Chapter 32
H ayes turned back to his girl after speaking briefly to Donovan. The other guy liked to joke around but Hayes knew he took his job seriously.
Fuck.
Every time he looked at her in that hospital bed, hurt and so fucking small, it was like a knife being stabbed into his gut.
And it made him so damn angry he could hardly breathe.
Nobody would touch her like that again.
No one.
He’d nearly left, but nothing felt right without her.
If he lost Devi after losing May . . . yeah, he wouldn’t survive that. But he decided that he also couldn’t live alone anymore. Either way, his life would be dark and soulless.
Devi lit up his life, as cheesy as it sounded. And there was no going back now. There was no returning to the way his life had been.
All he could do was make sure that nothing happened to her.
Yeah, he was going to be one overprotective bastard.
Should he tell her all this? She was dealing with enough right now, though.
Something was different with her. There was a darkness in her face that had never been there before.
Overloading her was a real possibility and he didn’t want to do that. All of that could wait until she was in a better headspace.
“Come on, baby girl. Let Daddy get you cleaned up.”
She sucked in a breath, then nodded. “Okay.”
“Good girl.” The trust she was giving him made him feel light.
Drawing back the blankets, he lifted her carefully into his arms.
“I can walk,” she told him.
“You tried to walk last night and fell on your ass. You’ve probably got a bruised butt.”
“I do not! And I was just a bit light-headed. I’m fine now.”
“You’re not walking,” he stated as he carried her into the bathroom.
He noticed that she still had her toy squirrel in her arms. It was worn, obviously well-loved.
“You’ve owned Coco for a while.” He set her down on a seat in the large bathroom.
“My mom gave her to me. She’s always been my bestest friend.”
Bestest? Her Little was peeking out. But she was still watching him with those big, worried eyes.
“So cute. Do you have any other toys?” He turned the shower on as she shook her head.
“No?” he asked then realized he’d left the bag of stuff that Donovan had brought with him out in the other room. “Wait right there, baby girl. Do not move. Understand?”
“Yes,” she said.
When he returned she was sitting exactly as he left her.
“You can relax, baby,” he told her as he pulled some items out. Donovan had done some shopping. There were a pair of soft, buttery yellow pajamas as well as some panties still in their packaging.
“Oh, those are pretty,” she said with wide eyes. “Who do they belong to?”
“You.”
“Me? Someone bought them for me?”
“Donovan did.”
“He did?” There was wonder in her voice. “That was so kind of him.”
“I told him to get you some stuff,” he muttered. He didn’t want that asshole getting all the credit.
The smile she gifted him was the first true smile he’d seen from her since she’d woken up in the hospital. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome, baby girl.” He turned to her after laying everything out. “Let’s get you undressed.”
She tensed.
“Well, maybe we should get Coco undressed first.”
She stared down at her toy. “Coco is a squirrel!”
“So?” he asked.
“So she doesn’t wear clothes, Daddy!” she cried.
There was some silence as she watched him for a reaction. He deliberately let his face soften.
Surprisingly, considering he was more used to frowning than smiling lately it wasn’t actually that hard.
“That’s Daddy’s brave girl,” he murmured. “Trust Daddy to take care of you?”
“That’s all you’ve done lately. Are you sure you’re not sick of it?”
“Sick of it? I wish I could do more for you.” He helped her stand and then he carefully took off her nightgown, leaving her in just her panties.
There was a soft blush in her cheeks, but he didn’t make any comments. He didn’t want to make her feel more awkward.
Just a Daddy looking after his girl.
He crouched in front of her. “Put your hands on my shoulders.”
“I haven’t . . . I haven’t shaved in days,” she said with a hint of shame and embarrassment.
“Want me to shave you as well?” he asked matter-of-factly as he took her panties down and off her legs.
She let out a strange noise and he glanced up to see she was bright red.
“You . . . you can’t do that!”
Hayes shook his head. “Of course I can, baby girl. I want to give you whatever you need. Maybe next shower, though.”
He tried not to stare too hard at her body. Her flat stomach and the curve of her hips. He could clearly see her ribs and it concerned him.
He kept those concerns to himself though as he helped her sit so he could wrap up her sore arm to protect it from the water. Once that was done, he stripped off his top. He was bound to get wet, helping her shower and he wanted something dry to get changed into.
Another strange noise came from her. This time when he glanced at her, he saw that she was staring at his bare chest with round eyes.
Her mouth was parted slightly and a surge of satisfaction filled him.
“Like what you see, baby girl?” he asked.
“You . . . um . . . I . . . yes,” she breathed out. “Very much like.”
“That’s good,” he told her. “I’m going to strip down to my boxers, all right? But they won’t come off. It’s just in case I get wet.”
“Okay. That sounds reasonable. Uh-huh. You should just take it all off.”
“All of it, huh?” he asked with amusement.
“Yeah, all of it. Wow, you’re so muscular. And gorgeous. Sexy. I like the chest hair.”
“Glad you like the chest hair, baby,” he told her as he picked her up again to sit her down on the bench in the shower.
Grabbing the detachable shower head, he checked the temperature of the water before he used it to wet her.
“How is that?” he asked as he put the shower head away so he could grab the soap.
“Good, Daddy. I want a bath, though.”
“A bath would be easier.”
“And then I could have bubbles.”
Hayes started washing her. He moved as quickly as he could, not wanting her to get cold.
“Yep, you could have bubbles and Daddy could take his time washing you.” He rinsed her off before grabbing the shampoo to do her hair. By the time he had washed her hair, she was starting to shiver.
Yeah, a bath would be much better.
He turned off the shower and picked up a towel. “Urgh, this thing is like sandpaper and it’s thin. I’ll get Donovan to pick you up some decent towels.”
“It’s o-okay, I don’t need n-new towels.”
“Yes, you do. This piece of crap is going to wipe off a layer of skin.”
“I r-really don’t.”
He wrapped her hair in one towel and her body in another before picking her up.
“Who is in charge right now?” he demanded.
“Um, you?”
“Me. I’m the Daddy, you’re the baby girl. So there’s gonna be no arguments over towels.”
“So when I’m Little I’m not allowed to argue?” she asked, giving him an exasperated look.
“No, you’re not allowed to argue whether you’re Little or Big,” he informed her.
“Daddy!” she cried. “That’s not happening.”
“Hmm, well, I could make it a rule,” he said as he stood her on a mat.
“You can’t make it a rule.” She attempted to stomp her foot, but started to wobble.
“Whoa. Be careful. No stomping your foot.” Reaching around, he gave her ass a light slap.
Nothing hard. Just to get her attention.
“Did you . . . did you just spank me?” she asked as he continued to dry her off.
“It was one smack. And you were heading toward a temper tantrum, which isn’t allowed.”
“I wasn’t having a tantrum, Daddy.”
“You stomped your foot and nearly fell over. That was naughty. Put your hand on Daddy’s shoulder while I put your panties on.”
She did as he said with a huff. “Spanking Devi isn’t nice.”
“Stomping your foot at Daddy isn’t nice, either,” he informed her.
“You were going to make no arguing a rule!”
“Well, you best hope I don’t or you’ll have a lot of trouble sitting since you seem to like to argue.”
There was silence. When he glanced up after putting on her pajama bottoms, she was looking worried.
“Hey, what’s wrong?” he asked.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to argue so much.” Her gaze was lowered and he hated that.
“Devi, look at me.” He put his finger under her chin and tilted her head back. “I shouldn’t have said that not arguing was a rule, okay? That bit about you not sitting comfortably was a joke.”
“Oh, so you’re not going to spank me for breaking the rules?”
“I won’t spank you for arguing,” he clarified. “Unless you’re arguing about doing something that would compromise your safety or health. But I will definitely spank you for breaking other rules.”
Devi was so confused.
Did the fact that he wanted to spank her mean something?
Don’t read anything into this, Devi.
You can’t let yourself hope.
He took the plastic cover off her arm and then helped her get the pajama top on. Thankfully, Donovan had bought her a short-sleeved top. Hayes had to rip the sleeve open slightly but he got it on over her arm.
By the time that was done, she was exhausted.
Picking her up, he carried her to the sink and set her on the counter next to it. The mirror was all steamed up so she couldn’t see herself.
Then she saw him putting some toothpaste on a bright pink toothbrush.
Oh, thank goodness.
She reached for the toothbrush, but he shook his head. “No, Daddy will do it for you. Open.”
She could feel herself blush. “I can do it.”
“Baby, open for Daddy.”
Dear Lord. She opened her mouth and he brushed her teeth, helping her turn and rinse.
God. That felt so much better once it was done.
“Come on, baby. Let’s get you back in bed.”
“Coco!” she cried. “Me want!”
Me want?
Really? She sounded like a toddler. She braced herself for any ridicule or scolding.
But all Hayes did was pick her up and then grab Coco, handing the squirrel to her. She hugged her toy tight, burying her face in Hayes’ chest as he carried her back to the bed.
“Here you go, baby. Let’s do your hair, then you can have a nap.”
“Naps are for babies,” she grumbled.
“And Little girls who are recovering from surgery,” he informed her as he settled in behind her with a hairbrush.
Where had that come from?
Had Donovan bought that for her too? Hayes took off the wet towel.
“I’m a big girl, Daddy.”
He sprayed something on her hair that smelled like strawberries.
“What was that?”
“Detangler,” he muttered as he started brushing the knots out of the bottom of her hair.
Had he done this for May? He was good at it. He knew how to brush so it didn’t hurt too much and he even had detangling spray.
Unless . . .
“Donovan got me detangling spray?”
Hayes growled. “I told him to get it.”
She bit her bottom lip, amusement filling her. She felt lighter than she had since waking up in here. He was so possessive.
Wait . . . he was being very possessive.
That was odd, wasn’t it?
Maybe it was because he wanted to Daddy someone.
After he brushed her hair, he braided it.
“There you go, baby girl,” he told her. “Time for a nap. I’ll pull the curtains.”
“No nap. Devi big girl. Big girls don’t nap.”
“How old is baby Devi?” he asked as he got off the bed. “What age do you regress to?”
She didn’t like losing the feel of him against her. She wanted him back with her, touching her. But she resisted begging him to return and hug her.
That wasn’t his job.
So she rested back against the pillow. She really was tired and just from a simple shower which was silly.
“I don’t know.”
“Hmm, are there things you like to do? Or things that interest you?”
“I used to hide with Coco under my bed when Derick was on a bender,” she said without thought. “I’d pull everything in around me under the bed to hide me. So maybe I’d like to make forts.”
“You would hide from your father under the bed by yourself because he terrified you?” he asked in a low, scary voice.
“I wasn’t alone,” she said in a small voice.
“You weren’t?” he asked.
“I had Coco.”
“A soft toy. How long would you stay under there?”
“I don’t know. Until I woke up and felt safe to come out.”
He started pacing up and down the room, swearing.
“You’re going to put a hole in the floor with all your pacing.” It was a sad attempt to make him smile.
He paused and turned to look at her. “That motherfucking bastard.”
“Do you think . . . I mean . . . have you heard whether the police have found anything out?”
“Not yet, baby.”
She could tell that he had attempted to soften his voice, but it still sounded tight, tense.
Then he walked over to her. Reaching out he lightly massaged her head. “Close your eyes, stop worrying about all of this.”
“You’re so bossy. You can’t just tell me to stop worrying. That never works.”
“It doesn’t? We’ll see.” He gathered her up into his chest and held her against him as he lightly rocked back and forth. “Go to sleep.”
Yep. Not going to happen.
Yawning, she snuggled into his chest. This felt so nice.
“That doesn’t work either! You can just order me to sleep. What if I don’t wanna sleep . . . Devi might wanna play . . . Devi . . . don’t . . . wanna . . .”
Gradually, her eyes closed and she stuck her thumb into her mouth.
Hayes smiled with no small sense of satisfaction as she drifted off to sleep. He laid her down, watching her suck on the thumb of her good hand. Then he tucked the blankets around her.
Didn’t want to sleep, huh?
Couldn’t boss her around?
Oh, she was in for a shock. He ran his hand over his face as he straightened.
A quiet knock on the door had him rushing over before Devi was woken up.
Kent stood on the other side with Liam, both of them looking grim. Liam held a battered backpack. It looked familiar.
“Devi’s asleep,” he said. “What’s going on?”
“Leave Donovan watching her,” Kent said. “We need to talk.”