Chapter 46
I remember when my bloodmark appeared. How afraid Uncle Jim had been. How quickly he sprang to action, realizing the only way to protect me was to get rid of it by any means necessary. Because he knew, right away, that it meant danger. Danger for me, danger for others.
Evlynne knows it, too.
I glimpse the sheer despair swimming in her eyes, and my heart goes out to her.
I sit beside her, dangling my feet over the edge. “When I was being interrogated by the Command, Jayde Valence was only able to penetrate my shield because I gave her an opening. But Fisher did it without me even realizing it. Your son is incredibly powerful.”
“I know.”
“Does he have other abilities?”
“Telepathy and projection. Hopefully it’s just those three, and we’re not dealing with a manipulation power.
” She blinks faster, as if trying not to cry again.
“I just want to protect him, you know?” Tears cling to her eyelashes, and when she blinks again, a few of them spill over. “I don’t want to disclose.”
So that’s what she’s afraid of. Disclosure to the Authority. And Fisher has a bloodmark. This isn’t a simple case of reporting, Hey, my kid has telepathy. Jot it down in his file.
This is, Hey, my kid might be dangerous.
“They’ll start training him immediately, and if he does have a manipulation ability or healing powers, they’ll want to use him.
” She angrily shakes her head. “They’re not using him, Darlington.
I’ve spent the past six years doing everything I can to give him a normal life.
Kallister and Adrienne wanted us to live on the base because I’m a pilot and I should be more available, but there was no way I’d allow my child to live in this fortress.
He needs to be around other kids his own age.
I fought for our cottage in the valley. I don’t care that I have to fly up here at the crack of dawn every morning.
I don’t fucking care as long as he’s safe and happy. ”
“What if you didn’t disclose?”
She falters for a second, eyeing me suspiciously.
“Don’t tell me that didn’t occur to you. You don’t have to say anything if you don’t want to.”
I don’t mention my own omission, how I still haven’t told anyone that I’m able to hear Cross talking to other people. Granted, it hasn’t happened in a while, but it’s certainly something the Authority would want to know about.
“It’ll be hard to hide,” she says slowly.
“Beatriz or Jenni help him get ready for bed some nights, if I’m running an op.
And what if he swims in the creek with the other children?
He can’t wear socks and shoes every second for the rest of his life.
Someone will see the bloodmark eventually. You can’t hide it forever.”
“I was able to hide mine. Until last year, anyway. My bloodmark appeared when I was seven. Jim—Julian Ash—burned it off me.”
She frowns. “Burned it how?”
“He poured a pot of boiling water over it. Sometimes I still smell the burning flesh. Like a phantom scent.”
Evlynne grimaces. “Wow. That’s brutal.”
“It was worth it to him to keep me safe.”
That gets me a dry laugh. “Are you suggesting I burn my son’s foot?”
“No, I think the location of his bloodmark will make it difficult to hide. I’m just saying, I know the lengths a parent might go to in order to protect their kid, especially a kid with a bloodmark.”
Though I don’t know if that applies to my actual parent. I’m still choosing to believe my mother was protecting me by giving me to Jim, but after reading almost her entire file, I’m not any closer to knowing who Marina Serrano really was.
“What are you going to do?” I ask Evlynne. “If you can’t hide the mark, can you…” I think it over. “Can you hide him?”
“What do you mean?”
“I’m not trying to pry, but…is there another parent in the equation? Can you send him to live with his father?”
“His father doesn’t even know he exists. I never told him I was pregnant.”
“Why not?”
Her tone grows bitter. “Because he was a Prime, and he had no idea I was a Mod. It’s already bad enough I slept with one of those piss-veins—I wasn’t about to raise a child with one. If he even would’ve wanted that, and if the Company would’ve let me keep the baby, and that’s a big fucking if.”
“How did you get pregnant? What about the shots?” All female citizens on the Continent receive yearly injections. Nobody is allowed to start a family unless the Company approves the application.
She laughs harshly. “Those shots are ninety-nine point nine nine percent effective and I’m the one who beats the odds thanks to one night of drunken sex. Fucking unreal.”
Sympathy clenches my chest. “Maybe it wouldn’t hurt to contact the father? Tell him he has a son? Sometimes people’s perspective changes when they see their child, right? Or at least I would hope so.”
It’s a weak pitch, but short of encouraging her to burn Fisher’s mark off, I don’t know how else she can hide this from the Authority.
“I don’t know…Luckily, he’s not manifesting anything dangerous right now.” She hesitates, seeking out my gaze. “Look, Darlington, I know we’re not friends, but if I could ask you to keep this to yourself—”
“Of course,” I say immediately. “I won’t say anything.”
“Not even to Gray. I know you’re screwing him.”
“That doesn’t mean I tell him everything.” I keep my tone light but my gaze firm. “I won’t say a word. I recognize that this isn’t about putting myself in danger. If I said something, I might be putting a child in danger, and I’d never do that to you and Fisher. I promise.”
Relief flickers through her eyes. “Thank you.” She pauses. “Sorry I stranded you on the mountain that day.”
“Eh. It was a character-building exercise. And I made friends with a ridgehowler. It’s fine.”
She snickers. “If you did that to me, I would have slit your throat in your sleep.”
“The old Wren might have done that,” I concede.
“Really.”
“I recognize my flaws,” I admit. “I don’t always think before I act. I let my emotions guide me. But I’ve been trying hard to show some restraint. So…” I shrug, feeling embarrassed. “Growth, I guess.”
“Growth is good,” she says, and for the first time since we met, she gives me a genuine smile.
Nearly a week passes with no update on what Evlynne has decided to do. We don’t interact much after our heart-to-heart on the Ledge, which I suspect is intentional on her part. She doesn’t seem like the kind of person who enjoys showing any vulnerability.
Tonight is Mako’s birthday. It also happens to be the night of a red moon, so I suspect there would have been a bonfire on the mountain either way. But we’re letting Mako believe the excitement in the air is all for him. He deserves it.
The last time I saw a red moon was with Uncle Jim.
He wasn’t one for traditions, but every year we’d sit out on the front porch and watch that moon while he sipped on a whiskey and didn’t say a word.
When I was eleven, I asked him if he thought a red moon was a symbol of good luck, and because Jim couldn’t grasp the concept of lying to children to make them happy, all he said was, I don’t believe in luck, little bird.
Bad things happen. Good things happen. Luck has nothing to do with it.
Gray and I head up to the bonfire after dark. My rifle is slung over my shoulder, and I hope I don’t need to use it, especially against my ridgehowler. I haven’t seen Prince since our night together, but I like to imagine he’s still alive, prowling the high ridges and howling to his friends.
As we traverse the narrow trail, I keep stopping myself from looking up at the sky. The moon is a gleaming crimson orb, casting a reddish glow across the mountain. It looks huge tonight, as if it’s right above our heads. Like I could reach out and touch it if I wanted to.
Beside me, Gray is complaining about a missing part for the plane he’s fixing up, an Old Era relic that he can’t get in the air, no matter how hard he tries.
“Jasper really can’t track it down?” I say, grinning at his misery.
“No.” He groans in annoyance. “Because every factory in the Lost Continents is underwater, and that’s where it was produced.”
“I’m sorry, ace.”
We arrive at the party to find the fire already blazing and the music blaring. Mako, who’s clearly well into his bottle of grange, is overjoyed to see us, throwing his arms around me and nearly knocking me over from the force of his hug. The man is completely unaware of how large he is.
I join Tana and Luisa near the fire. They’re chatting with Evlynne and Karra, and in a rare victory, I don’t sense any hostility from either woman, even Gray’s ex.
Teriq and Fiona are here tonight, too, but I don’t see Adrienne or Kallister. Teriq greets me with a smile as they walk past us, but Fiona just nods. Stiff as always.
The most surprising guest is Poppy. Looking pretty in a loose linen dress and sandals, she stands nearby talking to Raven Persimmons while her mother keeps darting worried frowns her way. I’m shocked Fiona allowed the girl to leave their quarters and experience some real human interaction.
Since I don’t like big scenes, I wait until the next time Mako is alone, refilling his bottle from the grange barrel, before I approach him.
“Hey, I have a surprise for you.” I give him a conspiratorial wink, since I know his two favorite things in life are melodrama and surprises.
He immediately abandons the alcohol, setting his bottle on top of the barrel. “A birthday present?”
“Close your eyes,” I tell him.
He obeys. But then cracks one open.
“Close your eyes,” I repeat.
Huffing impatiently, he squeezes both eyelids shut. I reach into my canvas bag for the foil-wrapped package inside of it. It’s large, almost as big as a tablet.
“Keep your eyes closed and hold out your hand.”
“Are you going to put a snake in it? Because I’ll scream like a little girl, and I don’t want to scream like that on my birthday.”
“I promise it’s not a snake.”
He sticks out his hand, palm facing up.
I place the present on it and say, “Happy birthday. You can look now.”
Mako glances at his hand, frowning at first. When he peels open the foil and sees what’s inside, he does indeed shriek like a little girl, attracting several startled looks.
“Is this what I think it is?” He gawks at me in astonishment.
“Yep.”
“How?” he demands. “Did Reed get this?”
“Nope. I procured it all by my lonesome. While being held hostage, no less.” I grin. “I honestly impress myself sometimes.”
Mako continues gaping at the gold chocolate bar in his hand. Speechless, for once.
“I made friends with one of my captors in Tierra Fe last week,” I explain. “Convinced her to break into their stash of granos de sol.”
“I love you,” declares Mako. “I’m in love with you. I want to marry you and bear your children. I mean, I want you to bear my children. I just think we should have children together and get married.”
I stare at him. “No,” I say. “But happy birthday.”
With an ecstatic whoop, he lifts me into his huge arms and swings me around. As I fight for my life, Gray strides over, grinning at the display.
“You gave it to him, I gather.”
“Yes,” I confirm as Mako finally sets me on my feet. “And he screamed like a little girl.”
“He does that,” Gray agrees.
“I don’t even care that you’re making fun of me.
” Mako breaks off a piece of chocolate and pops it into his mouth, then moans as if he just experienced the best orgasm of his life.
Slowly letting the gold substance melt on his tongue, he looks from me to Gray, his face hardening with tenacity.
“This doesn’t absolve the person who deprived me of this joy last year. ”
“Of course not,” Gray says.
“I won’t rest until Raven Persimmons has been brought to justice.”
“Wouldn’t expect anything less of you, brother.”
I spend the rest of the night with Gray, stealing kisses and caresses, laughing at his silly jokes. He keeps pulling me away to dance, I think he just wants to be close to me, but I don’t mind one bit. I pass my bottle of grange to Luisa and allow Gray to tug me into his arms.
“You look like pure smoke tonight,” he murmurs before burying his face in my neck. I shiver when I feel his mouth on me, nibbling, teasing.
“Don’t start anything we can’t finish right now,” I warn, though neither of us has been in a hurry to finish things even when we are alone. We haven’t had sex yet, which I think is unusual for both of us. We both have the tendency to jump headfirst and deal with the consequences later.
When we return to the group, someone hands me my bottle back. I’m hot from the dancing and the bonfire, so I swig the rest of the grange, grimacing at the weird aftertaste. Whoever made this batch used too much sugar. It’s so sweet, it makes my teeth hurt.
I toss the empty bottle in the fire, and the flames crackle and soar up to the sky as the glass disintegrates in the pit.
“Do you want to go back to my quarters?” Gray rasps in my ear.
I peer up at him, a little breathless. “I would love to.”
We say our goodbyes and head for the trail, but after a few steps I realize I’m not breathless from anticipation.
I’m breathless because it’s hard to breathe.
My heart starts beating faster, and then faster and faster. My stomach flutters, panic suffusing my veins.
“Something’s wrong,” I croak, staggering forward.
Gray tries to steady me. “What is it?”
“I…” I feel dizzy now. My chest is starting to hurt, clenching tight. And I still have that sweet taste of grange on my tongue, making me sick—
My mind travels back to that day with Uncle Jim in the clearing. That overly sweet smell.
It stops your heart and then you die.
“Heartroot,” I wheeze before everything goes black.