17. Scarlett
Chapter seventeen
Scarlett
T he front door opens, and my body tenses before I hear the familiar deep timbre of Leo’s voice.
“I’m home.”
I jump up from the swing and step inside, observing several takeout bags in his hands. Brutus rushes to the bags, his nose inspecting tonight’s dinner. He thinks he’ll get something out of one of them, and knowing how easily I give in to his big brown eyes, he’s probably right.
“I picked up Italian for dinner,” Leo says. “I hope that’s okay.”
I smile. “I would expect nothing less.”
His lips curve up as he enters the living room, heading directly toward me. With only inches between us and the bags still in his hands, he leans down, capturing my lips in a tantalizing kiss, leaving me weak in the knees, wanting more.
“Did you have a nice day?” he asks, pressing our foreheads together.
“I spent my morning with Maddy, and then I went to the women and children’s center to read to the kids in the afternoon.” I softly press my lips to his. “But this right here is my favorite part of my day.”
“Mine too.” He brushes his lips across my temple and then places the bags of food on the coffee table in front of the sectional.
Pulling a large treat out of his pocket, he throws it to the other side of the room, where Brutus makes himself comfortable.
“Are we eating in the living room tonight?” I inspect the spotless space. It’s not a room we’ve used very often; even Brutus keeps his slobber far away from it.
He gives a half shrug as he removes his leather jacket, placing it on the back of one of the chairs. “Thought we could enjoy dinner and a movie tonight if you’re up for it.”
A delicious warmth spreads through me.
Dinner and a movie.
Something normal people do.
“I’d like that.” I sit on the end of the sectional, tucking my legs beneath me.
Could this be our new life? Would we eventually fall into this comfortable routine together? Leo would spend his days negotiating deals and interrogating those who got in his family’s way. And I would… Well, what would I do? Or, more like, what could I do, especially when I had a difficult enough time leaving the safety of the Alarie Estate?
I enjoyed the ease of being around Leo. The familiar closeness we once shared has become more apparent each day, although maybe we aren’t as close physically as we once were…
An alluring chill ghosts over my skin as I remember our intimate moment together seven years ago. A beautiful memory that got me through so many dark days. Saving me. But could we find our way to that place again with each other? Or would Leo eventually lose patience with me, ending this marriage after Le Diable is found, expecting me to move on and forget about our time together? Our marriage. Him. All of it.
I mean, a man can probably only go so long without sex. They have needs. Desires. Cravings. As far as I know, Leo isn’t getting any of those things met by anyone else. Or is he? God, I hope not. Is it even fair for me to be upset if he is when I haven’t given him what he needs?
This is too deep for a Friday night.
“Good.” Leo’s voice releases me from my thoughts. He removes the containers from the bags and sits on the sectional. Reaching for the remote, he asks, “What would you like to watch?” He rolls up his sleeves, revealing his veiny muscular forearms covered in black ink. My eyes travel over each intricate design, watching the way they curve around every ridge.
“Scarlett?”
Shit . “Hmm?” What did he ask me? And how can something as trivial as a forearm cause me to lose all train of thought?
Because you know what that hand attached to his forearm is capable of doing…
He grins as if knowing what I was just thinking about. “What would you like to watch?”
“Oh, right.” I shove my fork into a familiar pasta dish, twirling the noodles. “Actually…” I clear my throat. “I was hoping I could talk to you about something first.”
“Of course.” He turns all of his attention on me.
“I umm…” I scratch my neck. I can do this. I had been thinking a lot about it recently, and it was time to come out with it. “What happened at Maddy’s engagement party made me think about things. And you see, I was thinking…” I swallow down my nerves. Out with it, Scarlett! “I was thinking I could take some self-defense classes,” I rush out in one breath.
Leo runs his fingers through his hair, deep in thought. “Well, fuck.”
Was this a bad idea? I thought he would approve, but maybe I overstepped my boundaries. A sweat breaks out on the back of my neck, and I shove my hands beneath my thighs.
“I should have thought of that,” he admits.
Relief washes over me.
“You’re not mad?”
“Mad?” His brows furrow. “Of course not.” He leans against the back of the couch, rubbing his chin. “Would you be opposed to one of my brothers training you?”
My lips open and close. “Your brothers? I was kind of hoping it would be you who trains me…”
He studies me, his eyes focused as he leans forward, his elbows resting on his knees. “I would love nothing more than to help you with this, but I feel like I would hold back because I would be scared of hurting you.” His eyes soften. “And that’s the last thing I ever want to do.”
I nod, understanding. “Then who?”
“Mauro,” he says matter-of-factly. “He trains all of our men in hand-to-hand combat. He will be the one to train you. I’ll reach out to him tonight about this.”
“Okay.” My shoulders drop. Is this a good idea? I’ve been thinking about it a lot recently. Convincing myself that it would help if I knew some basics. However, maybe this would turn out to be a disaster, especially if I were to train with someone other than Leo. But I understand his reasoning and know why he wants it to be Mauro.
After all, with Mauro being the unofficial enforcer for the family, he’s probably the most skilled on the property and can teach me everything he knows.
God, listen to me. I sound like someone getting ready for battle when I’m just looking to learn the basics. Things I should have learned years ago.
“Is there anything else you wanted to discuss?” Leo asks, his head tilted to the side.
I shake my head, pulling myself out of my thoughts. “No.”
He hesitates as if he can tell there’s more on my mind but picks up the remote instead, giving me space. “So, what should we watch?”
“Something a little lighthearted?”
“You got it.” He scrolls through the streaming services until we narrow our options and pick one we agree on.
About halfway through the movie, when the friends who are fake dating realize they have actual feelings for each other, I sulk against the cushion, rubbing my tummy. “I ate too much.”
“Me too.” Leo pushes his containers to the side and lies on the sofa, bringing a blanket over his body.
He looks comfy.
He looks warm.
He looks—
“Want to join?” he asks me.
I bite my bottom lip, my heart beating a little faster.
He holds up the blanket, revealing a good amount of space beside him. “The offer only lasts for another ten seconds.” He slowly starts bringing the blanket down. “Ten…nine…eight…”
He’s giving me a choice.
But do I want to join?
Yes, of course I do. But am I ready to join?
It’s just a cuddle.
Basically, it’s one giant hug.
A giant hug with my husband.
The same man who cut up all my fruits and vegetables so I wouldn’t have to. The same man who purchased a custom nightlight for me. And the same man who restrained himself while I rode his thigh, seeking my pleasure.
“Three…two…”
“Okay.” A smile tugs at my lips as I scoot across the couch.
I burrow myself into the space beside him, aligning my back to his front. My head rests on his bicep, and he brings the blanket down, cocooning us in warmth. His other hand rests on my waist, his sock-covered feet tangling around mine.
“Is this okay?”
“Y-yes.”
His thumb, resting on my waist where my shirt has ridden up, caresses my skin back and forth, and my breathing increases.
“You’re not trapped here. You have the freedom to leave at any time,” he assures me.
“I know.” I reach for his hand by my head, intertwining our fingers, instantly relaxing me. “I never feel trapped with you. It just takes my body a moment to realize I’m safe.”
His body relaxes against me. “I understand.”
Gazing up at the screen, I observe the two main characters in a heated embrace. The man has the woman pushed up against the wall as she moans out in pleasure, tugging on his hair. Suddenly, the man drops down to his knees before her, hauling up the hem of her dress, revealing her underwear.
A slight throb takes over my center as I watch with bated breath for what’s to come.
Does the woman want the man to do this?
Does she have a choice in what’s going on?
But as the man pushes aside her panties and buries his face between her legs, she screams, “More!”
I realize...she’s the one in control of this moment.
She wants this.
And I suddenly find myself squirming, wondering what something like that might feel like. Would I like that? Would Leo even want to do that to me?
“Does that feel good for her?” I ask in a whisper before I can stop myself. My cheeks blaze in heat. Why did I ask that?
Leo’s body stiffens for only a second before his head leans closer to mine, his hand sliding to the front of my stomach.
“It does.” His warm breath caresses my ear, sending a shiver down my spine. “When done right, it can be the most pleasure a woman feels.” His fingers trace my skin, heightening my impending arousal. “See the way the man can’t stop. He can’t get enough of her. Of her taste. Of her smell. Of her desires.”
I can’t breathe as I watch the screen before me. The man’s hands grip the woman’s thighs as he continues his ministrations, the woman grasping his hair, holding him hostage to her core as her back starts to arch and her mouth forms a perfect circle. And then, finally, a scream fills the room. But I realize then that it’s not a scream produced by pain. One I had become so accustomed to leaving my throat months ago. But instead, it’s a scream released from her overwhelming stimulation. It’s a good kind of scream.
“Because providing her pleasure gives him pleasure in return,” Leo murmurs, his hard body molding right up against mine.
I swallow hard; my whole body is engulfed with pulses of need shooting throughout every vein.
I want that.
I want to be in control of my pleasure. My body. My needs.
The night outside with Leo by the tree, when I straddled his thigh, was a small step in that direction. But watching this scene unfold before me makes me recognize it wasn’t enough for me.
And I need more.
I tilt my head to the side, my eyes catching with Leo’s.
“Do you want that, wife?” he asks, as if reading my mind. His nose grazes my cheek, his lips peppering kisses on my skin. “Do you want your husband to make you feel good by licking your sweet pussy until you come just like she did?”
My lips part in both shock and longing from his words. “Please,” I breathe.
“All I want to do is worship you.” His eyes lock with mine. “Tell me you want that too.”
I nod.
“I need to hear you say it, Scarlett.”
“I want that.” A tremble rolls through me as his eyes darken with hunger. “But I’m…scared.”
He leans over me, gently pushing my shoulder down so that I’m lying flat on my back. His hand finds my cheek, his thumb gently stroking my skin.
“Are you scared of me?” For the first time I can ever recall, I note a hint of fear in his eyes as he waits for my answer.
“No.” I shake my head adamantly. “You don’t scare me. You’re the one person I trust most in this world.”
His face softens, all hints of fear vanishing from his eyes. “Then what are you scared of?”
I swallow, closing my eyes, emotions I worked so hard to keep at bay, deciding to come out and play. “I’m scared of having a flashback,” I admit. My eyes blur with tears. “I’m scared that being with you in that way will bring me right back to those days where I was…” Locked up like an animal. Used. Left to die. A tear slides down my cheek. “Broken,” I whisper. “But I want to try. I want to feel a semblance of control over my life again.”
Leo’s lips brush against mine. Softly and tenderly. “I’m going to prove to you that he didn’t break you, Firefly.” He backs away, watching me. “If you let me, I can remind you what it feels like to be intimate with someone you trust. Someone who only wants to make you feel good, to bring the light back into your eyes.” He wipes my tears with his thumb and then presses a kiss to the same spot. “As your husband, I want nothing more than to bring you immense pleasure. I want to take care of all your needs. And I want you to know that you are always the one in control when you’re with me. I bow down to only you, wife.”
A whoosh of air leaves my lungs as my heart pounds behind my rib cage. “Remind me, Leo. Please,” I say softly, almost begging.
“I will,” he promises. “But you need to do two things for me.”
“What?”
“The first thing is I need your eyes on me the whole time. I want you to see who is bringing you pleasure. I want you to be present in this moment with me. Only me, Scarlett. I don’t want you getting lost in your head.”
I let out a breath. “Okay.”
“The second thing is that if you want me to stop, you tell me to stop. It’s that simple.”
“I can do that.”
“Good.” He leans down, pressing his lips to mine. A kiss that starts slow and sweet but quickly turns hungry and consuming. I wrap my hands around his neck, tugging him into me as my tongue slides against his, tasting, exploring, savoring. He slowly parts, a mischievous glint in his eyes as he slides down my body. “Tell me one more time that you want this. Let me hear you say it.”
My heart rate increases, but it’s not from nerves or fear. It’s from pure excitement. “I want this.”
He lifts the edge of my shirt, revealing my belly button. His lips land on my skin over and over again. A fire erupts in my stomach as my fingers clutch the blanket; anticipation, as I’ve never felt, builds within me.
He continues slowly sliding down my body, taking his sweet time. Sending me into a haze of unrelenting lust. His fingers find the zipper on my pants, and he looks up at me. “I’m going to take these off. Okay?”
“Okay.” I stare at the ceiling, my heart thrashing recklessly.
“Scarlett.”
“Yes?”
“What did I say?”
What did he say? I rack my mind. Did I already do something wrong? Am I messing this—
“Look at me, beautiful girl.” My eyes meet his. “I want you to watch everything I’m about to do to you. I want you in this moment with me and only me. Are you here with me?”
“I’m here,” I breathe.
He slides my pants over my thighs, and I lift my legs as he continues to pull them down until they’re entirely off me and tossed to the floor. Nerves rattle through me as he stares at my black panties, his gaze unwavering. His thumbs slide under the edge of my underwear. “Now, I’m going to take these off. Okay?”
“Y-yes.”
He slips the fabric gently down my legs. A cold gust of air hits me as I lie here with my bottom half bare to him. His eyes ignite with a primal fire, desire and longing taking over him. But he clears his throat and, ever so slowly, lowers himself between my legs, his face right above my most intimate area. The pounding between my legs intensifies to an unbearable level as I tighten my thighs together.
“Spread your legs for me, baby. Let me see all of you.”
Letting out a breath, I widen my legs, allowing him full access to my center.
His tongue comes out, licking his lips, his eyes taking me in. “Such a good girl.” Slowly, he lowers his mouth with his eyes on mine as he sticks out his tongue, flattens it against me, and takes one long, leisurely stroke.
“Ohhh,” I gasp at the unfamiliar but satisfying touch.
“I’m going to make you come now, wife.” He reaches his hand for mine, gently squeezing. “Don’t forget, eyes on me.”
And with that, he buries his face between my legs, lapping up my center like it’s his favorite meal, not leaving a single crumb on the plate.
“Leo,” I pant, squirming with pleasure.
This feeling is indescribable.
It feels good. Really good.
But it also feels like too much.
Like a part of me might explode at any moment.
But I want to unravel.
I want to lose control.
With my husband’s head between my legs.
I begin to close my eyes, getting lost in this all-consuming pleasure trip, but Leo stops everything, and before panicking, I quickly remember his words.
I want you to watch everything I’m about to do to you. I want you in this moment with me and only me.
So my eyes pop open, noticing him smirk before he goes back to worshiping me.
“Oh, Leo… It feels so good,” I moan.
My words only motivate him to work harder and faster. His tongue swirls inside me and then over me before landing on my most sensitive part.
“You taste so fucking sweet.”
I squeeze Leo’s hand as incoherent words leave my mouth.
“Oh yes… I’m almost… I’m about to…” My back arches off the couch, and my thighs begin to quiver. His fingers dig into my hip, holding me in place while his other hand tightens around my hand. His lips slide up my slit, sucking hard on my clit, and I unravel, falling down a dark abyss as I collapse back onto the couch, spent and completely drained, panting fast and hard. Leo pulls every last bit of the orgasm out of me before he slightly pulls away, leaning over me.
Wow. Just…wow.
I had no idea it could be like this.
That it could be so freeing and empowering all at the same time.
His eyes never break from mine as he moves up my body, positioning himself over me.
“Are you okay?” he asks softly, his hand cradling my cheek.
I blink back tears, a small smile breaking free. “I’m more than okay.” As the lust fog dissipates, I come to my senses and realize I’m probably expected to do something for him in return. I swallow down the lump in my throat. “Do you… Do you want me to—”
“No,” he rushes out, his face softening as he kisses my lips tenderly. “Making you feel good makes me feel good. It’s that simple, Firefly.” He slides onto his side beside me and wraps an arm around my waist, pulling me alongside him. I snuggle my face against his chest as he wraps the blanket around us.
“Thank you, Leo,” I whisper. “For being patient with me and making me feel not so…” Alone . But I stop myself before admitting this out loud. “Well, what I mean is I don’t think I could get through any of this without you.”
His lips glide across my forehead, his grip around me strengthening. “Those seven years I went without you was a life not worth living, and now that I have you again, I won’t risk losing you. Never again. The price is too damn high because you’re worth everything to me.” He presses his lips to my skin as warmth cascades over every inch of me. “Everything.”