Chapter 22
Chapter Twenty-Two
RILEY
“You missed such a fun night!” Lucy says the second she answers my call the next morning.
I sigh, rolling onto my stomach and propping my phone up against the pillows. “I’m so sorry I couldn’t come.”
I might not have gone out drinking last night, but I sure as hell feel like I did from how badly my head is pounding.
I really need to start stocking some food and water bottles in my room if I’m planning on locking myself away in here for hours at a time.
“For once, I actually believe you.” She laughs. “I’m honestly surprised the cops didn’t show up to shut the thing down; it got that crazy.”
“Do you have any sins you need to confess to?”
Lucy grins and taps the side of her nose with her manicured finger. “That’s a yes.”
She’s still wearing last night's makeup and looks surprisingly fresh-faced, considering she is yet to go to bed. Though, she’s swapped out her mini dress for a pair of sweats and a college tee.
“I’ll fill you in later, but first I want to know what the hell happened with you.”
“Kieran happened.”
“Uh oh. I thought you were all set on sneaking out before he got home?”
“I was, but then I literally ran into him on my way out, and he took one look at me and ordered me back up to my room like he’s my father. I swear I was this close to stabbing him with my stiletto.”
“Kinky. I bet Kieran is the type of guy to enjoy being called daddy.”
“Oh my god.” I bury my face in my comforter. “Can we stay on subject, please?”
She sighs. “Fine. You may continue your Kieran rant.”
I roll my eyes. “He hasn’t let me leave the apartment since Vegas except for going to campus yesterday.
At first, I didn’t mind because I had to study, so I didn’t care that my life had shrunk to nothing but textbooks and highlighters.
But now that finals are done, I have nothing to occupy my thoughts. ”
Lucy gives me a knowing smirk. “Except for Kieran.”
“He’s being ridiculously controlling, and now that we’ve… you know…”
“Had sex? Done the nasty? Gone at it like rabbits?”
“Lucy!”
“What? That’s what you meant, right?”
“Yes, but you don’t need to be so vulgar about it.”
“Sorry, no can do.”
“Anyway… Since we had sex, he’s gotten even worse. When he realized where I was going last night, he turned into a completely neanderthal, as if the idea of me going out was a personal attack against him or something.”
There’s a beat of silence, and then Lucy’s face breaks out into a huge smile.
I frown. “What?”
“Well… The sex kind of explains it.”
My eyebrows furrow harder. “Explains what?”
“That whole possessive man routine? It didn’t start until after Vegas, right?”
“Right...”
“And he freaked out when he thought you were going out in a slutty dress to meet up with other guys?”
I hesitate, then nod. “Yeah… So?”
“So, the guy is jealous!”
“Are you crazy? Why would Kieran be jealous? He made it very clear to Ronan that I was just a means to an end.”
Lucy sighs. “Riley… Have you ever considered the fact that Kieran was just trying to keep his brother off his back?”
“No, but—”
“But that could explain the caveman behavior.”
“Or he just didn’t want me to blow our cover.”
“Oh, yeah, I guess.”
“Regardless of whether or not he was lying to Ronan, that only makes his behavior last night even more confusing. You can’t treat someone like they’re disposable and then act pissed when they don’t sit around waiting for you.”
“Some guys are just like that. They don’t want the donut, but God forbid anyone else licks it.”
“Did you just compare me to a baked good?”
“An extremely hot, off-limits baked good.”
I roll my eyes but smile. “You’re the worst.”
“Yet, you keep me around anyway.” She winks. “So, there’s no chance of us even meeting up for a coffee?”
“I don’t know. But I can ask.”
“Does it make me a bad feminist if I think it’s kind of hot that you have to ask Kieran for permission to leave the house?”
I laugh. “Now that finals are done, maybe you should direct all your energy into finding a good therapist.”
It’s nearing nine in the morning by the time I end the call with Lucy and emerge from my room.
Kieran came upstairs to bed last night, and I was half-hoping that he would knock on my door and offer me an apology, but of course he didn’t.
So, once again, we’re back to avoiding each other.
After making myself a coffee, I take a seat at the kitchen island and wait for Kieran to show his face.
My right hand automatically goes to fiddle with my ring, and I frown when I find it missing.
I had completely forgotten that I had taken it off last night. It’s still sitting at the bottom of my underwear drawer, and I told myself I would put it on when I got home, but after the fight we had last night, I want to wear it even less.
I don’t need another reminder of how I let myself get too close to someone who clearly never cared for me in the first place.
I also took it off because I wanted Kieran to notice. I wanted it to sting the way his words did when I heard them.
My coffee mug is almost empty by the time Kieran appears at the bottom of the stairs, barefoot and wearing a pair of black slacks and a shirt that is half-unbuttoned as if he just threw it on. His hair is messy and damp from the shower and is starting to curl in that way that I secretly love.
I hate that he looks good. This would hurt so much less if he didn’t look like he just walked off the set of a cologne advert.
When his dark eyes meet mine, they harden.
“Riley,” he says coolly before stalking over to the coffee pot and pouring himself a cup.
I silently curse myself for not pouring the rest down the sink just to piss him off.
“I want to meet Lucy for coffee,” I say in place of a greeting.
“No.”
I grind my teeth and take a breath. “Jace will come with me.”
Kieran’s back is to me, but I notice the way his shoulders stiffen. “Jace doesn’t answer to you.”
“Whatever. If you could just have him pick Lucy up on the way, that would be appreciated.”
“You’re not going out.”
I fold my arms over my chest. “Why? Because Sean O’Keefe might be lurking outside Starbucks?”
“Don’t joke.” He turns around to face me. “I thought you were meant to be smart, Riley? Or did Declan buy your place at Columbia for you?”
I let my lips pull up into a smile. “You think your words can hurt me? Because believe me, growing up with Declan Walsh as a father gives you incredibly thick skin, Sullivan. So, go on, do your worst.”
We stare at each other for a moment until Kieran looks away, lowering his eyes to the floor.
He exhales. “I don’t want to hurt you, Riley.”
“Oh, really? You didn’t act like that last night.”
“I know, I’m…sorry.”
“Yeah, right.”
“Why do you insist on fighting me on every single little thing?” He runs his fingers through his damp hair. “Can’t we just have one conversation without ripping each other’s heads off like we did in Vegas?”
“Vegas was a lie.”
“Not all of it.”
His eyes meet mine again, and my heart skips a beat as I think back to the night in the pool.
I want to believe that not all of it was a lie, more than anything, but I can’t ignore what I heard. It’s all I can see when he looks at me. It’s in his eyes and written all over his face.
His eyes drop for a second. “I thought we were becoming friends.”
I lower my gaze to the floor, feeling the familiar sting of tears as I try to push the memory of Kieran’s body pressed against mine from my mind.
“I feel like I’m being suffocated.”
“By what?”
“Everything. This apartment, this arrangement…”
You.
The word is on the tip of my tongue, but I swallow it.
At this point, I genuinely wonder if marrying Sean O’Keefe might have been a better option. At least he was clear with what he wanted from me.
Finally, Kieran sighs and rubs the back of his neck. “What if I gave you something to do?”
“Like what, chores?”
“No, not chores. A job.”
“A job? Seriously? So, you want me to be a maid?”
The muscle in his jaw ticks. “I already have a maid. Look. Ciara is being put on bed rest for the remainder of her pregnancy and, like you, she is very headstrong and stubborn.”
“I beg to differ—”
“I was going to suggest to Ronan that you can spend a few hours over at their place every day to keep her company as well as help get things ready for the babies. I think you would have a lot in common.”
I hesitate.
I’m not very good with new people, and the thought of being forced to become friends with Ronan’s wife scares me a little.
“You want me to babysit your pregnant sister-in-law?”
“She needs distraction and you…” He gestures vaguely at me. “You need to get out of the apartment, so I thought, why not kill two birds with one stone?”
“But I don’t know anything about babies, and pregnancy kind of freaks me out.”
“Seriously?”
“There are literal humans inside humans! How can it not freak you out?”
He shrugs. “I guess I don’t think too much about it.”
“Urgh, you’re such a guy.”
“You’re missing the point I’m trying to make here, Riley.” Kieran sighs. “Can you just accept the hand I’m trying to offer you? Right now, it’s the best I can do.”
I exhale slowly.
It’s not exactly what I was hoping to get from this conversation, but it’s something.
From what I’ve heard, Ciara was put in a similar situation to me in terms of her marriage with Ronan, so maybe she might have some good advice for helping me deal with my situation with Kieran.
“Fine. I’ll do it.”
He visibly relaxes as he dips his chin. “I’ll make arrangements.”
I pause, watching Kieran carefully.
There’s something in his expression that makes me almost want to cower under the weight of his gaze. But instead, I decide to push him even further.
“What about coffee with Lucy? Surely, I can do that, too?”
His eyes narrow slightly. “You can invite her over here. That way, I can be sure you’re both safe. But only if you promise not to turn my apartment into a sorority house.”
And there it is again, that stupid twist in my chest. Because if Kieran truly didn’t care, he wouldn’t be offering me compromises. He would just say no and move on without a second thought.
But he’s trying.
Sort of.
“I promise.”
He nods before stalking to the fridge.
The silence falls between us once more as he starts pulling out cartons of eggs and packets of bacon, and I awkwardly fiddle with the hem of my t-shirt before deciding I’m better off leaving him alone.
As I turn to leave, I glance back at Kieran one last time.
He’s staring at my bare hand, and I swear for a moment, hurt flickers in his eyes.