Chapter 38
ROSALIE
“Mommy, can we put extra chocolate chips in?” Ellis asked me as we added our ingredients to the big mixing bowl in the horsemen’s kitchen that evening.
Cole had to go work at the hospital and had been gone for over twelve hours now.
Ethan was away, staying at a hotel with Enzo’s son, so as not to distract us from Cole.
Enzo… I assumed he was working. He left early and hadn’t been back since.
Instead, he’d left Memphis and Dmitri outside the door and more men downstairs.
It was almost like being back in the past.
“Sure,” I said, smiling at her.
“I think my daddy will like extra chocolate chips!” she exclaimed, adding more to the bowl.
She’d enjoyed hanging out with Cole last night, but she went to bed early, and I went with her. I’d barely spoken to Cole. He’d been enraptured with Ellis, and I did all I could to keep from crying as I watched him try to play with her and learn all he could.
His coming into our bedroom all night had gotten annoying, so I’d locked the door. The only thing I knew from him was that he had a long day at the hospital and he’d be home later tonight. I didn’t even reply to the message. It didn’t matter to me what he did.
At least that’s what I told myself.
He’d made it clear he wasn’t interested in me anymore when he walked out on me. Now, he was zeroed in on our daughter, and I really prayed he stayed in her life and didn’t hurt her by running off.
The front door opened, and I looked to see Cole coming in, a bag in his hand. Ellis jumped off her stool and ran for him.
The most beautiful smile spread across his face as he bent, his arms open wide for her.
She rushed into them, and he hugged her tightly.
“Hey, Ellie-gator,” he murmured softly. “How’s my perfect girl?”
I swallowed hard as he doted on her.
“Ellie-gator?” She giggled as she pulled back to look at him. “I’m not a gator!”
He chuckled. “You’re my Ellie-gator. My Ellie-Belly. My Ellie-phant.”
She giggled louder as he tickled her.
I looked away and wiped at my eyes quickly.
Damnit, Cole…
“What have you and Mommy been doing today?” Cole asked as she took his hand and led him to the kitchen.
“Making cookies! Mommy said you like her cookies!” Ellis released his hand and climbed back onto her stool next to me.
“I do. Mommy’s cookies are my favorite,” he said, stopping at the kitchen island across from where I was sitting.
“Hey, Rosalie,” he greeted me softly.
“Hey,” I murmured.
“How was your day?” he asked.
“Nice.” I gave him a quick smile. “How was yours?”
He stared back at me, his blue eyes so sad. It made my breath catch in my chest.
“It was OK. Couldn’t wait for it to end so I could come home to you guys.”
“Mommy too?” Ellis asked, her eyes wide.
“Yes, Ellie-gator. Mommy too,” Cole murmured, tearing his eyes away from me and smiling at Ellis.
“Where did you go today, Daddy?” Ellis asked.
Cole reached out and adjusted the little pink apron one of Enzo’s guys had brought back to the house last night for her.
“I had to work,” he said.
“Where do you work?” she asked. “Do you sing like my other daddies?”
“No, I don’t sing, at least not as well as Mommy and likely your other daddies. I’m a doctor at the hospital.”
“You save people who are hurt?” Ellis asked, staring at him like he was a miracle.
“I try to.” Cole smiled at her.
“I want to be like you and Mommy when I grow up!”
Cole’s smile widened, his eyes glittering with unshed tears. “You want to be more like Mommy than me.”
“I want to dance but be famous like Mommy and smart like you!”
Cole chuckled. “I know you will be.”
She wiggled in her seat and added more chocolate to the cookie batter.
“That’s a lot of chocolate chips,” Cole said, eyeing the batter.
“She insisted,” I said.
“I think they’ll be perfect.” Cole leaned down and kissed the top of Ellis’s head. “I’m going to grab a quick shower. Don’t eat any of those without me.”
Ellis giggled and grabbed a cookie scoop. She loved scooping cookies.
Cole cast me one final look that made my stomach twist before he left the room. I watched Ellis dole out the cookies. She was slow and careful as she worked. I smiled. She really did remind me of Cole.
My phone buzzed, and I pulled it out to see Ryder’s name on the screen.
“Hey,” I answered.
“Hey, Red. Checking in on you,” his deep voice greeted me.
“Thank you. I’m OK. We’re doing good. Making cookies,” I said, breathing out.
“Oh, man,” he said. “I love your cookies.”
“You can come get some. It would be nice to see a familiar face.”
He was quiet for a moment. “Yeah?”
“Yeah,” I murmured. “I miss you.”
“I miss you, too.”
My heart jumped at his words. “Maybe come tonight after Ellis goes to sleep. I-I could meet you downstairs.”
“Sounds good,” he said, his voice doing something to me.
I shook my head, trying to push away the sudden surge of feelings.
Truth be told, I’d had these feelings for a long time with Ryder, but I always pushed them away.
I didn’t think he was interested, plus, I wasn’t sure how Anson would take it.
Not that Anson ever denied me a thing, but Ryder and Anson were best friends. I didn’t want to ruin that.
“OK. Um, I’ll text you when she’s out.”
“Perfect. Talk soon,” he said before we disconnected.
I finished helping Ellis and winced as I tried to hop over to the oven with the cookie sheet.
“Let me.” Cole swooped in, took the cookie sheet from me, slid it into the oven, and set the timer.
“Thanks,” I said.
He reached for me, taking me gently into his arms and helping me to sit down on my stool again.
“There you go,” he murmured. “How are you feeling?”
“Good.” I swallowed.
“You’ll be back to running through my dreams before you know it,” he continued, his voice soft in my ear.
My heart skipped at his words, and I looked up at him.
“I know. I’m out of line. I’m sorry.” He backed away from me and went to Ellis.
“I got you something,” he said, grabbing a gift off the counter, which he must have brought out with him.
Ellis’s eyes lit up as he handed the package to her.
She tore into the wrapping paper and then stared at the ballerina doll in her hands, her eyes wide. She looked from the doll to him.
“It-It comes with a matching outfit for you and a tiara to wear. Do you like it?”
“It’s so pretty! Can you open it for me?”
“Of course,” he said, his voice gruff. He took the package from her and tore it apart. He placed the little plastic tiara on her head and helped her put the costume over her clothes.
“Thank you, Daddy!” she squealed, turning in a circle in front of us, her new doll clutched to her chest. “I have to show Mr. Rufus! Mommy! Can we call other daddies and show them?”
“Sure, sweetie,” I said, smiling at her excitement.
She ran from the room, presumably to get her bear from the bedroom we were staying in.
That left Cole and me alone.
“I-I wanted to get her something,” he said, looking at me. “I’m used to getting stuff for Riot. He’s big into Ninja Turtles. Race cars. Loves motocross.” His voice trailed off. “I-I didn’t know if it was the right gift. I was scared to give it to her.”
“It’s perfect,” I murmured. “She loves it.”
He smiled. “Good. I’m-I’m shit at this stuff. I’m trying…” his voice trailed off. “Rosalie?”
“Yeah?”
“Why didn’t you tell me?” his voice cracked. “About her? I… I mean, five years? What the fuck? I-I missed everything…”
I stared back at him, my bottom lip trembling. “I was scared.”
“Of what? Me?” He came around the island and cradled my face. “Rosebud. Tell me.”
“I was scared of you. Of your life. Of-Of the woman you were with. I didn’t want to bother you. You left me. I-I thought that spoke volumes when you went with Enzo and left me behind.”
“Fuck,” he snarled softly. “Didn’t want to bother me?
Rosalie, we have a fucking kid together.
It’s not a bother. This shit is just wild.
I’m trying to cope with the suddenness of it.
You should have fucking told me! Goddamnit.
” He released my face and wiped at his eyes.
“I have missed my daughter’s birth. Her first birthday.
Her first day of preschool. Ballet recitals. All of it.”
“You left me, Cole. You still keep leaving me,” I snapped at him.
“How am I leaving you? I’m right fucking here!” His blue eyes flashed with his words. “I fucking kidnapped you, for fuck’s sake. I’d like to think that voices my feelings a lot fucking better than anything I could ever say to you!”
“What are your feelings?” I asked.
He let out a soft huff of air. “They don’t fucking matter anymore. You’re married. You’ve replaced the guys and me. Right now, all I’m concerned about is our daughter’s stability. You have enough cock, don’t you think?”
My face heated at his words.
“You’re a fucking asshole,” I said, my voice shaking.
He stared back at me, a muscle ticking along his jaw.
“You fucking replaced us. I held off, wanting you. Loving you. And you fucking replaced me. I never replaced you. I didn’t keep your daughter from you either.
And I sure as fuck didn’t dump Foxy in the ground and walk away without looking back and marry some giant tatted prick bastard who beats the fuck out of someone you said you loved! ”
His words were a slap in the face to me. I blinked back tears rapidly.
“Nice,” I said, wiping at my eyes. “Thanks for telling me.”
He exhaled. “Those… Those are my feelings. You asked. Now you know.”
I wanted to leave the room, but I had to endure because Ellis would come running back any minute.
“I-I have other feelings, too,” he continued. “I’ve been thinking all day about them.”
“What?” I asked, sniffling.
“You’re gone a lot. I’m really not. I can take Ellis, so you can travel and work—”
My heart thudded hard.
“No. You’re not taking my daughter.”
“She’d have a good life with me—”
I got up from my stool and grabbed my crutches.
“Where are you going? I want to talk about this— ” He reached for me.
“Get your fucking hands off me,” I said softly. “Or I will beat the fuck out of you with my crutches.”
He frowned and released my arm. “Where are you going?”
“I am going upstairs. Take the cookies out of the oven. We’ll try this again tomorrow.”
“You’re going to keep Ellis up there?” he asked, his voice shaking.
“We had a movie night planned anyway, and it’s getting close to her bedtime.”
“Rosalie,” he choked out. “I-I…”
“Save it. We’ll try again tomorrow.” And with those words, I hobbled away from him.
After Ellis went to bed, I lay next to her. We’d spoken to Evan, Anson, and Klaus, and the three had put on a production of The Three Little Pigs for us, complete with pig noses. Klaus doubled as the wolf and had ears. Ellis had laughed, and even I’d cracked a smile despite being upset about Cole.
Evan asked me what was wrong, but I told him we’d talk later, and he accepted that.
I let Ellis sleep for a little longer before I messaged Ryder to tell him I was ready.
Carefully, I got out of bed, grabbed a pair of sweatpants and a purple tank top, then put on my black zipper hoodie. I checked Ellis one more time before taking my crutches and making my way downstairs. I grabbed a little baggie of cookies off the counter and put them into my pocket on my way out.
No one was down there, so I left and came face-to-face with Dmitri.
“Hey there,” he greeted me, getting up from the couch he was sitting on outside the elevator. It was a big area, and Enzo had it set up with a TV and a sitting area.
“Hey,” I muttered.
“Where are you going?” he asked.
“Out.”
He raised his brows at that. “Where is out?”
“None of your damn business.”
“It’s my job to watch you,” he said. “Boss’s orders. If you leave, I leave with you.”
“I think the fuck not. Sit down. I’m going alone.”
He shook his head. “I don’t think you are.”
I closed my eyes and breathed out before pulling out my phone and calling Enzo.
“He’s in his office.” Dmitri nodded to the apartment. “Inside.”
I ignored him.
“Yes?” Enzo answered.
“Call your dog off me,” I said.
Enzo was quiet for a moment. “What?”
“You have a guard outside the door, and he won’t let me leave. He said he has to go with me, and I don’t want company.”
“I’m coming out.” He disconnected the call, and I ground my teeth. I didn’t feel like dealing with this shit.
I sent a quick text to Ryder to let him know the situation.
Rosalie: The guards won’t let me leave. Enzo is coming out.
Ryder: I’m coming up. Hang tight.
The door to the apartment opened, and Enzo stepped out. He was still in his black suit. He strolled toward us.
“What’s going on?” he asked.
“I’m trying to leave—”
“And you told me not to let her,” Dmitri said.
Enzo looked from Dmitri to me. “He’s doing his job. Your guys didn’t want you out. I promised them you’d be taken care of. I’m only doing what I promised them I’d do.”
“I’m not going out. I’m going to the lobby,” I said.
“Why?” Enzo asked.
“It’s none of your damn business,” I snapped.
“It is. You’re under my care. Everything you do is my business.”
The elevator dinged, and Ryder stepped out. He came right to me.
“Ah, I see,” Enzo murmured, eyeing Ryder.
“I’m taking her out for a bit,” Ryder said.
Enzo chuckled softly. “I don’t think you are.”
“I am not asking for your permission. She is coming with me.”
“While she leaves her daughter behind? I think the fuck not.”
“She’s sleeping. She doesn’t wake in the night. I’m only going to the lobby—”
“You don’t need to explain yourself to him,” Ryder said. “He’s not your guy. You don’t owe him an explanation, nor does he need to grant you permission.”
“You know what? Go.” Enzo backed away. “Dmitri can let you back in if you decide to come back.”
“I’m just getting some air,” I mumbled.
“Then get some air,” Enzo said. “Have fun.”
He walked away and went back into the apartment. Dmitri left, sank onto the couch again, and grabbed the remote.
“Come on,” Ryder said, leading me to the elevator, his hand on my lower back as he guided me. I hobbled into the elevator with him, and the doors closed.
He turned to me and pushed my hair beneath my hoodie and zipped me up all the way.
I stared up at him as he worked. Ryder was really beautiful.
“He’s an asshole,” Ryder murmured as he stared down at me. “Don’t let him get to you.”
I nodded as he backed away, my throat tight.
Enzo may be an asshole, but despite the time and space between us these days, I still did give a damn.
Damn me for that.