Chapter 3
CHAPTER THREE
RAVEN
I jerked awake as someone nudged me, my eyes flying open to find Marco standing in front of me. It took me a second to realize I was at their house on the couch.
“Hey. Sorry to wake you, but dinner’s on the table.”
“Dinner?” I mumbled, panic hitting me when I realized I must have fallen asleep while watching the kids.
As if knowing exactly where my mind went, he chuckled. “Yeah, dinner. Poppy said you passed out at ten this morning. Don’t worry, Luke and Poppy had the kids handled.”
“I’m so sorry. Please don’t fire me,” I begged, turning my attention to the doorway as Rory spoke.
“You lasted longer than I expected. I bet twenty bucks on you falling asleep by eight,” she teased, crossing her arms. “You needed the sleep.”
“No, I needed the money.”
“Well, right now, you need dinner. Come on,” she encouraged, waiting for me to get to my feet before walking ahead into the kitchen, leaving Marco to follow behind me. There were kids everywhere, multiple tables spread out across the dining room to make enough space for everyone. It felt weird being here without anyone my age, but thankfully, Noah motioned for me to sit beside him.
My stomach growled as I smelled the delicious food on my plate, the roast beef and vegetables piled high. Noah snickered, and my face heated when I realized how loud it had been.
“Noah,” someone warned, shutting him up. I looked over at Rory, and she gave me a nod of encouragement, my hand getting a mind of its own as it grabbed my fork and shoveled a large piece of potato into my mouth.
No one mentioned how fast I ate my food, everyone having random conversations as they helped feed the younger kids. Diesel offered me seconds, and I happily took some more meat and potatoes, eating until my stomach hurt.
“When did you eat last?” Noah asked curiously, the concern in his gaze sweet, but everyone was looking at me, and I hated it. I wasn’t that hungry, I just hadn’t had that much food in front of me for a long time.
Even when they’d sent food to my house, we rationed it to make it last.
“Excuse me,” I mumbled with embarrassment, pushing back from the table and speed-walking out to the back patio for a cigarette, scolding myself for being rude and eating like a savage animal.
I wasn’t alone for long before Rory appeared, understanding on her face.
“Noah isn’t very good at reading the room. He didn’t mean to embarrass you. I’m personally glad you enjoyed your food.”
“I’m the worst employee. I slept all day and then ate like a pig at your table,” I forced out, taking a drag of my cigarette.
“Have you not been eating at home? I can send more if?—”
“No,” I blurted out, making her frown. I didn’t want to tell her what Dad had done, but I wouldn’t put it past her to send more. He’d only just sell it again. “My dad sold most of the meat you gave us. I’m sorry, I got home and it was all gone. I?—”
“That’s not on you. I know what it’s like to have a selfish father,” she said calmly, sitting in a chair at the outdoor table. “Beckett told you you’re welcome to stay here, right?”
“I appreciate the offer, but that’s my home,” I said quietly, getting a nod in return.
“It is. Stay between the two places if you want. It’s obvious you’re not sleeping or eating properly. I won’t pry, but you can talk to me if you want. I know what it’s like to be too paranoid to sleep. Did you want to come to fight night? We’re heading to the Shed soon. Beckett’s fighting.”
“I don’t want to offend you, but I really don’t want to get involved with crew stuff,” I said slowly, a light laugh leaving her.
“I’m not offended. You’re more than welcome to go to bed and catch up on more sleep. I just thought you might want to watch Beckett fight, that’s all. You two seem to be good friends. It’s rare she gets along with other women.”
Watching Beckett fight would be awesome.
“Should I go? Would Beckett like that?”
She grinned. “If you’re trying to impress Beckett, that’s almost impossible, but she wouldn’t be mad about having you cheer her on. I promise, we have extra security for fight night since a lot of people outside the crews go. Currently, we’re not at war with any other crew. You’re technically the dangerous one, since you have the mafia after you.”
“I’m putting everyone in danger,” I groaned, raking a hand through my hair as I finished my cigarette. “I shouldn’t be here.”
“You don’t think I could handle the mafia? Have faith in my lack of patience and my itchy trigger finger,” she scolded. “Who do you think I am? A rookie?”
“You’re the woman that girls like me want to be when we grow up,” I said without missing a beat.
“That’s concerning,” she grumbled, but I could tell she appreciated it.
“You came from nothing and built a fucking empire, Rory. Just because people don’t all know you were once that neglected Heights kid yourself, doesn’t mean they don’t look up to you. They see everything you’re doing for those less fortunate,” I promised, a smile tugging at her lips.
“Okay, motivational speaker. How about you find your shoes and a jacket so we can go and watch my sweet daughter beat people up?”
I laughed at that, waiting for her to stand so I could follow her back into the house, almost running into Noah, who gave me a look of apology. He went to speak, and I shook my head.
“It’s fine. To answer your question, I ate a few days ago.”
His eyebrows shot up in surprise. “Days?”
“Yeah,” I mumbled, slipping past him and heading towards the living room, where my hoodie and shoes still were from this morning.
Diesel and Marco were sitting on the couch, kids piled up on their laps as they watched something on the TV. The baby was asleep on Diesel’s chest, and he gave me a smile when he saw me.
“Hey. Feel better after a nap and some food?”
“A nap? I slept all day when I was supposed to be working,” I huffed, slipping my ratty shoes on. Marco’s eyes lingered on them, but he didn’t say anything as Diesel shrugged.
“Sleep was more important. A good sleep and a meal can fix anything.”
“Are you guys going to the Shed tonight?” I asked curiously, since it seemed they were comfortable and weren’t moving any time soon.
“I am,” Diesel confirmed, motioning to Marco. “He’s on babysitting duty with some of the others. I’ll help with the kids for a while though, so you go with Rory and I’ll catch up after. And Raven? Don’t let Beckett con you into a fight with anyone. I know she’ll try.”
“I don’t want my name tied in with crew activities. I already have a fucking hit out on me,” I grumbled, wincing as one of the kids sitting next to Marco repeated the curse word.
They didn’t seem bothered by it though.
“Don’t panic, he arrived with that word,” Diesel drawled with amusement. “Go on. Rory likes being early.”
I said goodbye as I pulled my hoodie on and walked off to find Rory, only having to wait a few minutes for her to finish getting her things together before she led me out to the garage. There were cars everywhere in here, all worth millions of dollars, and the thought of having that much money made me feel a little sick.
There were a lot of people living here though, so it wasn’t a surprise to see so many cars.
“I’d hate to know what you guys pay for insurance,” I said absently, and Rory let out a laugh as she unlocked a shiny red car.
“It’s sickening, you don’t want to know.”
“What’s this one worth?”
She eyed me for a second before answering, and I knew she didn’t care about me knowing, it was just that she knew I could never even think about having that kind of money. She didn’t want to seem like she was bragging.
“I haven’t loved a car since I lost my Corvette forever ago. I like cars a lot, but I get a feeling that I can’t describe when I really love it. I got that feeling while sitting in this car, and just knew I needed to bring it home last month. It’s a 2024 Maserati MC20 Cielo. It’s worth almost three hundred thousand.”
I almost didn’t want to get in with my shoes on.
“It’s gorgeous,” I admitted, moving to open the door, but she grinned.
“You want to drive it?”
“Absolutely not. I can’t afford to fix it if I break it,” I said instantly, and she rolled her eyes and walked around the car to me.
“I can afford to fix it. Go on, get in the driver’s seat. My kids grew up with fancy car privileges, so it’s refreshing to see someone appreciate it for what it is. I’ll explain how the fancy buttons work.”
“Promise you won’t bury me in a shallow grave if I dent it?”
“I’d never do that. I only dig deep ones,” she joked, giving me a nudge to get me moving.
I walked around to the driver’s door and climbed in, glancing at her as I tried to figure everything out.
The guys had always had older muscle cars, nothing like this.
She explained how everything worked, then she put the garage door up with a button so I could slowly back it out into the driveway, the sound of the engine screaming money.
I put it in drive and carefully made my way out onto the road, relaxing the more I drove.
I glanced at Rory, finding her already watching me with a smile on her face.
“What?” I asked, flicking my eyes back to the road.
“I think this is the first time I’ve seen you react to something with this much excitement.”
“It’s not every day I get to drive a super sports car,” I said as my face burned a little, but she just smiled wider.
“My kids take for granted that they can have whatever they want. I wouldn’t call them spoiled, but they always got nice things like cars for their birthdays. Don’t be embarrassed for enjoying something, Raven. I think you personally need to find more things to enjoy.”
“I enjoy lots of things.”
“Like what?”
“Like, sitting on the old school roof with the guys and watching the stars while we throw random shit over the edge, or when we practice shooting there. I love spray painting things and fighting too, but I don’t really fight anymore unless I have to,” I explained, steering the car onto the road that led to the Shed. “Some nights, we’d stay up late watching movies, while other nights, we’d stay at the Pit until the sun rose. Well, we did all of that when there was a we.”
“You can still do all those things on your own.”
“It was the company that made it fun,” I sighed, parking in front of the Shed and switching the engine off before turning to her. “Thanks for trusting me with your car.”
“You’re welcome,” she replied as we climbed out, just as Beckett arrived with Jett in her passenger seat, and for a second, I panicked that Logan would be in the back.
“Hey,” Beckett smirked as she joined us, nodding towards her mom’s car. “She let you drive it? She won’t even let me do that.”
I gave a surprised look to Rory, who rolled her eyes and replied in a dry tone. “You want to race it. That’s why I told you no.”
“I didn’t think you wanted to rub shoulders with the crews?” Beckett teased as she turned her attention back to me. “Changed your mind?”
“Your mom said you were fighting, so I thought it might be cool to watch,” I shrugged, following them as they all started walking inside. It was a little nerve-wracking being in the Psychos’ Shed, I couldn’t lie.
“Emerson,” Beckett said to Jett as she went to walk off, pointing at me. “Stay with Raven.”
“I don’t need a babysitter,” I argued, her eyebrow raising.
“No, but he does. Tag, you’re it,” she deadpanned before walking away, but Jett just chuckled.
“So, where do you want to sit? By the bar? The back corner? We can stand near the cage when the fights start if you want to be closer,” he offered.
“I’m surprised Logan isn’t with you,” I said instead, and I didn’t miss the grimace.
“He’s too busy staring at his phone, hoping you’ll call him.”
“He’ll be waiting a while.”
“Raven—” He gently grabbed my arm to stop me leaving, and I yanked it away from him.
“Don’t fucking touch me.”
“Can you just listen for a second then? I know you’re angry, you have every right to be, but maybe talking to Logan would be good for both of you. He didn’t mean to hurt you,” he said quickly, making me pause my plans to walk off on him. When he saw he had my attention, he continued. “He’s insanely in love with you, and he hates that you’re grieving without him.”
“Why did he brag to Reid like that?” I asked quietly, and he scoffed.
“Because he’s a fucking idiot. He won’t make excuses for how he acted, he just wishes that you wouldn’t shut him out. I don’t want to guilt you into talking to him, but the guy cried himself to sleep the night you were in the hospital. Don’t tell him I told you that though, I’m sworn to secrecy.”
“The fuck was he crying for? He wasn’t hit by a damn car.”
“No, but you were, and his emotions are still fried from finding out he’d knocked you up the same time he found out you’d lost the baby. He was hit with panic, joy, then devastation all in one moment,” he answered calmly. “Maybe just send him a text? Even if it’s just to say to leave you alone and you’re not ready to talk yet.”
We were interrupted by Maddox, who smacked Jett in the back of the head with a scowl. “What did I tell you? Mind your own business and stay out of it.”
“I’m just trying to help,” Jett grumbled as he rubbed his head, glancing at me. “I’m sorry for overstepping, I just wanted you to know that he’s really sorry and missing you.”
“I don’t want to talk to him, but can you tell him I’m sorry too?” I asked softly, making him frown.
“What for?”
“I’m just sorry,” I said before walking towards the corner to find a seat, dropping into it and pulling my hood up to hide a little. I was nowhere near ready to talk to Logan, but I hated knowing he was grieving too.
I couldn’t lie, I hadn’t expected it to hit him that hard.
It didn’t take long for Jett to sit beside me, but he didn’t talk, just keeping me company as more people arrived so the fights could start.
Reid
“Took your time,” Riley teased as I parked beside her car and switched the engine off, giving her an amused grin as I opened the door and put the window up.
“I had to get gas.”
“Where’d you go to get it? Lightning Cove? I’ve been waiting for ages.”
“You’ve been here for five minutes,” I deadpanned, locking the car and following her into the Psychos’ Shed. It was fight night, and since Luna had decided to spend some time with Penn at the Thieves’ compound, Riley figured we should watch the fights.
I’d seen Beckett fight before, and she scared me a little.
We moved through the crowd towards the bar, and I didn’t miss the way Diesel eyed me as he poured drinks for people. I hadn’t done anything to piss him off, so I had no idea why I was getting the stink eye.
Riley noticed too, having no issue calling him out for it. “Stop glaring at my friends.”
“Who told you she was here?” he asked me, not replying to Riley.
I frowned, not knowing what he was talking about, and then my gaze caught on familiar blue hair in the back corner. “Raven’s here?”
“You’re going to leave her alone,” Diesel grunted, handing me and Riley a beer each. “She wanted to watch Beckett fight. She’s had a long week, so let the girl breathe.”
“Did something happen?” I asked with worry, forcing my attention back to Diesel. “Is she okay?”
“She’s fine. Stay away from her,” he said sharply, ending the conversation.
“I think we should ignore him so you can go and say sorry to her face,” Riley muttered, but she led me in the opposite direction from Raven to watch the fight.
I sipped my beer, trying to keep my eyes on Raven through the cage. She was sitting next to Jett, not that they seemed to be talking. Her eyes were glued to the violence in the cage as two girls beat the shit out of each other.
“Okay, so since I’m the one who’s good with girls, I’ll give you some advice,” Riley started, ticking things off with her fingers. “If you make eye contact or pass her, just smile. Don’t grab her arm and demand a conversation. If she speaks to you, just be cool. No serious shit unless she starts it. Also, don’t do that alpha growly bullshit. It’s not sexy, she won’t appreciate it.”
“You’re good with pussy, not relationships or serious things. Luna’s the first girl you’ve ever dated, and it’s been messy,” I said bluntly, making her glare at me.
“Hey, I’m figuring it out. We’ve been together for a year now, you know? I’m not a rookie anymore.”
I rolled my eyes, looking back at the cage just as one of the girls hit the ground. Raven’s eyes landed on me, and she jerked back as if I’d slapped her. Jett started looking for what had startled her, and he winced when he saw me.
It took everything in me to shake my head at her, letting her know I wasn’t going to bother her. I wanted nothing more than to grab her, throw her over my shoulder, and take her back to Riley’s so we could talk.
Confusion flickered across her face, and I dragged my attention away from her in hopes that it would relax her. Maybe she’d come to me if I made it obvious I wasn’t going to corner her and demand that she went home with me.
It was no surprise when Jett appeared in front of me a few moments later. “What are you doing here?”
“Watching Beckett fight,” I answered, wishing her fight would start so I could leave. “I didn’t know Raven was here. Tell her I won’t bother her.”
“I can do that. Shall I tell her anything else?” he asked slowly, and I frowned.
“Like what?”
“Ugh,” Riley said with annoyance, nudging me. “How about that you’re sorry and you were a dumb idiot?”
“Oh, yeah. That too,” I muttered, peering around him to find Raven watching us intently. She shifted her gaze away when she realized I’d caught her watching me. “And that I miss her.”
“Have anything to say to Logan?” Jett encouraged, earning a dirty look from me.
“No.”
“Seriously?” Jett groaned, motioning to Riley. “Back me up here, Riley. You want him out of your house eventually, right?”
She chuckled, draining her beer before replying. “I don’t give a shit how long Barron stays. It’s not like I’ll fuck my girl any quieter for his sake. If he leaves traumatized, that’s on him.”
I’d heard enough out of their bedroom to scar me for a lifetime, but I didn’t exactly have anywhere else to go.
“Logan’s presence putting a damper on your sex life, Emerson?” I joked.
“No. I just miss walking around naked and fucking Beck in the living room,” he smirked.
Beckett’s fight was called, and he darted back to his seat, leaning closer to Raven to talk to her.
I hated how relieved she was by whatever he said about me leaving her alone.
Riley explained Beckett’s opponent's history to me, and I was a little worried that she might actually beat Beckett, but I should’ve known better. It took two seconds into the fight for me to realize the other girl was using her all, while Beckett was just toying with her.
Maddox and some others were shouting encouragement as Beckett started throwing punches, and even Raven was on her feet yelling.
Blood sprayed as Beckett broke the girl’s nose, not stopping her attack until she was physically dragged off by Skeeter, who was very obviously Beckett and Ryder’s biological father.
Not only did they look similar, but Beckett shared his crazy.
My attention wasn’t on Beckett though, it was on Raven.
She was grinning so wide, talking a mile a minute to Beckett the second she was out of the cage, and I wanted to know how they’d become so close over the past week.
I’d heard they were becoming good friends, but seeing them interact was proof. Raven’s guard was down, and Beckett’s shoulders were relaxed, telling me that both of them were comfortable in whatever conversation they were having.
Riley started talking to Maddox about something, so I took the time to go outside for a cigarette, wanting to get out of the noise for a moment.
I leaned against my car, staring at the door as I wondered if I should just leave, but then Raven stepped out. It was obvious she was just as surprised to see me, her whole body tensing.
“You stay, I can go,” I murmured, fishing my keys from my pocket.
“Reid.” Her voice cracked, and I tucked my keys back into my pocket, holding her gaze.
“Yeah?”
She looked ready to run, and as much as I wanted to comfort her, I knew it would only scare her away.
When she didn’t answer me, I took another drag of my cigarette, giving her one more second before I spoke again. “I’m sorry that you couldn’t be honest with me and that I reacted like a piece of shit in the hospital when I found out.” She blew out a shaky breath, and I risked it as I took a step closer, tossing my cigarette on the ground. “I’m sorry we made you feel like you were just some girl we were fighting over, and that when you needed me to comfort you, I made you feel worse.”
Her lip trembled, but this time when I stepped closer, she stepped back. It took all my willpower to stop moving.
“You have no idea how much you hurt me,” she finally said, her voice quiet. “I didn’t need you calling me stupid or careless. I’d been hit by a fucking car, Reid. I’d just found out I’d lost a baby that I hadn’t known about, and instead of the comfort I needed, you and Logan beat each other up and made me sound like a piece of ass you’d dragged home from a party. I never belonged to any of you. You can’t be angry at Logan for being with me when you rejected me.”
“I can’t be with you, Raven. I can’t do that to Josh,” I said weakly, her face wiping free of sadness as anger took over.
“Josh was thirteen, your promises to him were typical for teenage boys, but not grown men. Do you think Josh would like this? That you choose him over me again and again? That you called me names, insulted me, and would prefer me to be miserable than see me find someone?”
“But he?—”
“He’s fucking dead!” she snapped, throwing her hands out wide. “He’s not here, but I am! You keep trying to make a ghost happy instead of me!”
Angry tears burned her eyes, and when she stalked towards me, I stood still and let her punch me. There was some force behind it, telling me just how pissed she was, and then she smacked her hand into my chest, doing it again and again until she weakened and a tear fell.
My body ached, it was still healing from the damage Logan had inflicted, but I deserved every hit she threw.
“I hate you so much,” she whispered, yanking back from me and shoving her hood over her head, walking off into the dark towards the road. I watched her go, knowing chasing her wouldn’t change anything.
“What the hell did you do now?” Riley muttered as she appeared beside me, her eyes on Raven’s retreating figure.
“Let her get her anger out a little,” I answered, rubbing my sore cheek. “I’m kind of proud of her swing.”
She snickered, giving me the side-eye. “You’re one kinky bitch, Barron. C’mon, come back inside for another beer. Maddox wants to fight some prick, so there’s more entertainment coming.”
I’d rather follow Raven to make sure she got home, but I reluctantly walked back inside with Riley, bracing myself for Beckett’s wrath that I knew was coming my way.