Chapter 8
CHAPTER EIGHT
ANDER
D iesel grilled me for ages before letting me go, and as much as I’d intended on sitting in my car in the driveway to keep an eye on Raven all day, he made sure I left first before heading off to wherever he was going.
I could’ve just gone home, but I wanted to be close in case Raven needed me, so I headed to Riley’s.
I forgot that Reid was there until I parked behind his Challenger, knowing there was no point in trying to sneak off since the fucker was smoking on the front porch with Riley. His entire body was tense, and he was already walking towards me when I opened the car door to climb out.
“You son of a?—”
“Yeah, I know. I’m a bastard. It’s not what you think, bro,” I said calmly, letting him punch me to make himself feel better.
“You almost got them fucking killed!” Reid snapped, trying to punch me a second time, but Riley stepped between us and shoved him back a step.
“Enough. We can talk inside.”
“You knew he was back?”
“I did.”
Betrayal flickered in his eyes, and I was starting to think he was going to leave until he turned and stalked into the house.
“A heads up would’ve been nice,” Riley said dryly as she glanced at me.
“Heads up,” I chuckled. “Sorry, I forgot he was here. I wanted to stay close to your mom’s in case Raven needed me. I just dropped her off.”
She groaned, motioning for me to follow her inside. “You drove up to the house?”
“Yeah. Raven told Beckett about you hiding my car,” I said with a shrug.
“That fucking snitch. Your little girlfriend’s going to lose teeth if she doesn’t shut up.”
“Leave her alone, she’s been through some shit,” I replied as we stepped into the living room, not correcting the girlfriend comment. I weirdly liked it.
Guilt slammed into me when Blake popped into my head next, but I shook it off. I had to try to move on from her, we weren’t good for each other, and it was obvious nothing was going to change between us.
Even if she came back, she’d only leave again. I had to remember that.
Maybe focusing on Raven was a good idea.
My dick twitched in my pants at the thought of Raven hate-fucking me, and I didn’t realize I’d smiled until Riley scoffed at me.
“Whatever you’re thinking about, stop it. I don’t want to see your sex face or your boner.”
“Considering I’ve witnessed you fucking Luna on the hood of your car, I think you’ll get over it,” I answered with amusement, earning a glare.
“Well, maybe if you stopped sneaking up on people, you wouldn’t have to witness such things.”
“Or you could stop banging outside in public places. It’s not like my fucking car is quiet. How tight were her thighs around your head for you to miss my arrival?” I teased, my face softening when Luna walked in. She was sweet and the complete opposite of Riley. I liked her. “Hey, Luna.”
“You can’t be here,” she said in a panic, her eyes flashing to Riley. “What if the mafia shows up?”
“Then we hand him over so they leave,” Reid said flatly, crossing his arms and eyeing me with mistrust. It wasn’t that long ago that we’d spent most days hanging out, and I hated how we now felt like strangers.
“It’s not like that. I need to explain,” I replied, giving Reid my full attention. “I was dumb and got caught up with them a long time ago. Stefano trusted me to run things here, so when he stopped digging into my shit, I figured Zavier wouldn’t get dragged in. It was just small jobs, then they got more complex. I thought Stefano had no idea about anyone I was connected to here, so when I left, I thought I was steering them away from you guys. I left to keep everyone safe.”
“Well, good job. Lopez got shot and Raven got hit by a fucking car. It’s your fault everything went to shit,” he spat, pissing me off a little. I’d take the blame for the mafia stuff, but Raven walking away from them had nothing to do with me.
“From what I’ve heard, you dug your own grave with her,” I answered, not knowing much other than the fact that Raven wouldn’t have kicked them out because of me.
Reid and Logan did something all on their own, I’d almost bet money on it.
“You’re going to get her killed!”
“I’ve kept her safe!” I snapped back, jabbing a finger against his chest. “I found her alone at a Heights party on Saturday night, you know? Naked and fucking terrified as Devon and Michael tried to rape her. I handled it, and now she’s living with me so it won’t happen again.”
The anger vanished from his face, his shoulders dropping as he stared at me. “What?”
“She wanted to hook up with Michael for some reason, not realizing it was a trap. Raven’s smart as fuck, but when she’s angry, she doesn’t think things through. You guys hurt her, and that’s not my fault. When I heard about her and Zavier being run down, I got here as fast as I could so I could help. What did you guys do? I know she won’t speak to you, so what the hell did you do to her?”
“She’s living with you?” he asked as if he didn’t hear anything else I’d said.
“Yeah. Lopez stayed last night too. What the fuck did you do to make her hate you?” I demanded, not expecting Riley to be the one to answer.
“This dickhead lost his shit at the hospital when he found out Raven had been pregnant. Flipped out at her, called her names, then got in a fist fight with Logan for knocking her up. Logan bragged about fucking her, and Raven obviously snapped and threw them out. I don't blame her for cutting them off. I wasn’t there, but I heard Mom talking about it to my dads. It was super messy.”
Reid winced, not defending himself in the slightest. “I was blindsided and hurt by the fact that Logan and Zavier had been dating her behind my back. I was an asshole.”
That answered a bunch of my questions about what had happened between them all. I was a little surprised that Raven had agreed to date both of them, but I was even more surprised that Reid hadn’t been included.
He’d wanted her for forever.
“I know you were a kid too, but you fucking raised those two. How could you say cruel shit to her when she was that emotional?” I growled, wanting to snap his neck. “You need to get over yourself. If she wanted to be with Logan and Zav, then you should’ve just been happy that she was with guys who’d look after her.”
“What if it was Blake, huh? You’d cut anyone’s hands off for touching her!”
“Don’t bring Blake into this.”
“Why? Don’t want to hear the truth?”
“I don’t want to be reminded that I lost her, you dick,” I answered, taking a step back from him before I could punch him in the mouth. “We’re over. End of story. I’m not what she needs, and she leaves every time she comes back. You don’t see me tearing the countryside apart to make her stay. She’s better off without me.”
He shook his head, believing his own delusions. “Raven isn’t better off without me though.”
“Isn’t she?” Riley scoffed, having no issue calling him out. “You hurt her more than anyone.”
“They were all lying to me!” he barked, raking a frustrated hand through his hair.
“Because you’re too much of an asshole for them to tell you!” she threw back. “You can’t blame them for keeping it to themselves. Look how you fucking reacted when you found out.”
He went silent, muttering something about going outside for a cigarette on his way out the door, and Riley motioned for me to go with him. It would most likely end in a fist fight at this rate, but I followed him anyway.
“I feel like I’m dying without her,” he said without looking up from where he sat on the steps the second I joined him. “I hate not knowing if she’s okay.”
“Some girls might find the possessive alpha bullshit cute, but Raven isn’t that type of girl,” I reminded him as I sat beside him. “Gotta show you care by letting her lead.”
“It’s not that simple.”
“It is. Give her space, and trust that she’ll go to you when she needs help. Smothering her and dictating her life only makes her resent you. Trust goes both ways, dude.”
He finally looked over at me, questions filling his eyes. “Where the fuck have you been, man? I thought Lopez was going to jump off a damn cliff when you cut him off.”
“He was fine. He had you guys.”
“That’s what you think?” he snorted, shaking his head as he looked away. “He’s been a mess. We were all worried about you. You honestly didn’t bail and leave Zav to take the fall?”
“No. I thought I was steering them in the other direction. I didn’t know they’d come here looking for him. They think I told him things that I shouldn’t have. I’m going to fix it, I just need time.”
We sat in silence for a few minutes before he spoke, his voice quiet. “Devon and Michael didn’t hurt her?”
“I wouldn’t say that. She was smacked around a little and probably felt violated by Michael’s lies. He conned her into bed. They were messing around when Devon joined them and ruined it. She’d planned on sleeping with Michael, but not Devon.”
“Did you?—”
“I killed them,” I said honestly, putting my forearms on my knees and leaning forward. “No one fucking touches her without her permission. She’s safe with me, you know that.”
A deep sigh left him as his gaze returned to mine, conflict written all over his face. “I want to trust you with her, but I need you to understand why I’m struggling.”
“I know why. I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t care, Reid. I promise, I’ve got her and Zav,” I said sincerely, relief hitting me when he raised his knuckles to bump.
I tapped mine against his, a small smile tugging at his lips. “I’m so mad at you, but it’s good to see you.”
“Missed you too. I take it you aren’t aware that Raven’s dad’s back?”
“Clint’s back?” he asked with slight panic.
“Yeah. I took her home after the shit with Devon and Michael, and her dad was there with his friends. They were saying some gross shit about Raven, so I dragged her ass back to my house.”
“Thank you. Tie her up in the basement if you have to. She’s slippery,” he joked, making me laugh.
“She is. Once they clear out and Stefano fucks off, I’ll get her home,” I confirmed, not wanting him to think I was holding her forever, even if that thought was appealing.
“Convince her to stay away from that house. We’ve been trying to get her to leave it for so long, but she won’t. She can’t heal from her brother’s murder until she stops eating breakfast in the kitchen that it happened in,” he answered quietly, tossing his cigarette butt in the ashtray on the step beside him. “None of us can move on until then.”
I’d heard a lot about Josh since meeting these guys, so I knew how much his death had affected them.
“I’ll see what I can do,” I nodded, nudging his shoulder. “I’ll see if I can get her to talk to you if you promise not to be a prick.”
“You’d do that?” he asked with surprise, staring at me in disbelief.
“Of course. I know how much she means to you guys. Don’t fuck it up though. I’m only going to do it once,” I warned, making him nod.
“I just need some time with her. I’ve talked to her once, I just need to try again so she’ll stop running from me.”
“If you make her cry, I’ll punch you in the mouth and then your balls,” I replied, his eyes narrowing.
“Why do you care so much about her all of a sudden?”
“I’ve always liked her, you know that,” I shrugged, getting to my feet. “Before you get angry about it, it’s not like she likes me back in the slightest. I think she’d rather kill me than let me touch her, so you have nothing to worry about.”
“Facts,” he muttered, standing as well. “Just keep her safe for me.”
An idea popped into my head to soften Raven up a little, and I started walking towards my car. “Hey, I’ll be back later. I need to go and do something.”
“Like what?” he called back, making me grin.
“I need to prove I’m a good guy.”
Raven
The day went by fast, and I was dealing with a screaming toddler when Ander arrived. Kids were way too strong sometimes, and this little boy was lucky I had a good hold on him or he would’ve thrown himself backwards out of my arms.
I’d found him trying to eat one of the many shoes in this house, and he was upset that I’d taken it from him.
Jensen was home, trying to cook dinner before everyone else arrived, and I was a little surprised when Diesel let Ander in without complaint.
Ander ran an amused glance over me and the screaming kid, not asking before plucking him out of my arms with a grin. “Whoa there, kiddo. Where’d you learn dance moves like that?”
My arms ached from holding him, so I wasn’t mad that he’d taken over.
The kid, on the other hand, acted like he hadn’t even left my arms, continuing to scream and throw his body around like a demon.
“He’s very emotional,” Diesel sighed as he watched Ander try to calm the kid. “He flips out so easily.”
Ander silently carried him into the living room and placed him on the couch, letting him thrash about while he switched the TV off and turned the lights off.
“What are you doing?” I asked as we followed him, the kid choking from working himself up too much. “Ander?—”
“Hush,” he said quietly, half closing the door before standing next to me silently and waiting. Diesel didn’t say anything, so I did as I was told and shut up, the kid slowly calming down until he was hiccuping.
It was hard to see, but I was aware of Ander moving closer to the couch, his body dropping low as he got on the kid’s level.
“Hey. Do you feel better now?” he asked, and I could just make out the kid rubbing his eyes in the dim light from the cracked door. He didn't reply, but Ander acted like he had. “Good. Do you want to sit in the dark a little longer?”
He talked quietly to the kid for a few minutes about random things before standing, picking the kid up, and bringing him over for me to take.
“What did you do?” I asked slowly, and the little boy nuzzled into me, exhausted from his meltdown.
“Kids get over-stimulated, especially when they’re little and don’t know how to express their feelings properly. Between the noise, lights, and people touching him, I think it just got too much for him to handle and he freaked,” he explained, seeming to impress not just me, but Diesel too.
“How did you know it would help?” Diesel asked, staring at him like he’d grown two heads.
“I had a little sister who struggled with getting overwhelmed easily. It worked for her,” he shrugged, and I didn’t miss the use of past tense.
Diesel thanked us as he took the kid so they could get ready for dinner and we could leave, neither of us talking until we got into the car.
“Your sister?—”
“I got something for you,” he said, cutting me off and obviously avoiding the subject, reaching for the box that was by my feet. He placed it on my lap before starting the car, glancing at me when I didn’t move. “Open it.”
I knew what it was, and I wasn’t sure how I felt about it.
I hesitated before lifting the lid off the shoe box, finding a brand new pair of high top sneakers in my size.
“You got me shoes?” I asked with confusion, looking over at him as he started driving out of the driveway and onto the road.
“Yours are fucked. No strings attached, promise. I just need to know if you’re running from the mafia, that they’re not going to fall apart and slow you down if I’m not there to shoot people for you,” he said, like it was a perfectly normal reason to buy shoes for someone.
The black, red, and white patterns on them were exactly the type I would’ve picked myself too.
“Thank you,” I said softly, earning a grin.
“You’re welcome. I was worried you’d throw them at me and refuse to accept them.”
“I’m still considering it,” I joked, pulling them out to inspect them better. “They’re really nice.”
“I’m glad you like them,” he smiled. “I saw Reid today.”
That was one way to ruin the mood.
“Yeah?” I mumbled, putting the lid back on the box.
“I kind of forgot he’s staying at Riley’s, and I went there after dropping you off.”
“Is that why your cheek is bruising?” I asked lightly, mentally scolding myself for making it obvious I’d noticed.
“Yeah. I don’t blame him, I just bailed and everyone thought I’d fucked you all over. We had a long talk once he stopped wanting to swing at me.”
I tried hard to fight it, but I couldn’t help myself.
“How is he?”
“His usual asshole self. He’s missing you though. He’d like to talk to you when you’re ready.”
“I’m so mad at him, Ander. You weren’t there at the hospital. He said some really cruel shit to me,” I said softly, holding the box a little tighter on my lap. “I know it was stupid to have unprotected sex when I wasn’t on birth control, but he didn’t have to scream it at me when I’d just found out I’d miscarried.”
“He knows that, we had a good chat about it today. It’s not an excuse, but he was just freaked out and hurt that he was kept in the dark about everything. I told him his bossy bullshit isn’t cute, and you’re not the type to appreciate it. He knows he fucked up,” he said, surprising me a little.
“How do you know that’s not my type?”
“I’m pretty good at reading girls. You like a man who can protect you, but not control you. Someone who’s strong but gentle. I have a feeling you don’t mind submitting to someone who allows you to dominate them back sometimes,” he chuckled, giving me a wink. “Bit hard to do all of that with insecure men.”
I snorted, not being able to help the small smile that tugged at my lips. “The thought of spanking them really does it for me.”
“It’s not just about that though. You like the power balance where you feel equal, right? Real men know giving their woman the power is way better.”
“You don’t seem the type to allow a girl to take charge.”
“You don’t really know me then, do you?” he murmured, his eyes flicking to the rearview just before all the humor left his face. “We’re being tailed. Put the box on the floor.”
“Why—”
“Because if for some reason the airbags go off, I don’t want it slamming the box into your face,” he said seriously, glancing over to make sure I was doing as I was told. “I can outrun them easily, so I need you to hold on and trust me to get you home safely. Can you do that?” I went to turn and look out the window, but he reached over and took my wrist, distracting me. “Don’t look. I need to take off and catch them off guard. If they see you looking, they’ll know we see them.”
“Promise you won’t kill me?” I asked nervously, having no issue with fast cars, but knowing this car was a rocket on the road.
“I promise,” he said confidently, letting me go and putting his hand on the gear stick. “Hold on.”
My fingers dug into the seat on either side of my thighs as he put his foot down suddenly, sending me back into my seat so hard my teeth clacked. I squeezed my eyes shut as my stomach flipped, not opening them again until we took a corner and I felt like not looking was scarier.
He slammed through the gears as he sped through streets, taking us through Ashburn Valley and into Rawson Grove. The scenery whipped by faster than my eyes could focus on it, and after a while, I slowly released my grip on the seat and tried to relax.
At least there was still some light left in the sky.
The Supra engine roared, and I hated how calm Ander was. This speed was normal for him, and the thought of Reid and Logan driving at these speeds in the middle of the night made me feel sick.
Ander turned onto a straight stretch of road and floored it, pressing buttons on the dash until ringing filled the car.
“You’re not being very discreet, racer boy,” Cruz chuckled as he answered. “I thought you were trying to hide?”
“Got a tail. I need eyes,” Ander said quickly, downshifting and scaring the shit out of me as he pumped the clutch and sent us sideways around a corner without warning, straightening it out with ease as he sped up again.
“I’m watching you. There’s a black SUV following you, and it looks like they’re trying to trap you at the end of Kipper Lane. Turn off at Hewston Street and go left on Blair Street. If you’re fast, they’ll lose sight of you and you should be able to take the long way home if you head towards Pine Valley then turn off to the Heights at the last street. I’ll keep eyes on you until you’re there, but remember, the Heights are patchy. I won’t see everything if they’re in blind spots.”
“You don’t even know where I live.”
“Sure I do. That cute little one bedroom with the garage on Benson Street.”
“There’s no fucking cameras near me, I checked. How?—”
“Tracked your phone and went snooping this morning. Lock your windows better. Anyone could just climb right in and help themselves to your fridge. By the way, you’re almost out of butter,” he said seriously, making me snicker as Ander bit out a growl.
“Stay out of my house, asshole.”
“You basically told me to come in with shit security like that. No wonder you lost Raven the other night if all she had to do was open the window.”
“I broke the lock to get out,” I admitted, and he didn’t seem all that surprised to hear my voice.
“That’s because it was a shitty lock. I’ll send some better ones over with Zav. I’m meeting up with him on his way home,” he sighed, clicking away at his keyboard. “SUV’s starting to struggle, so make your move, bro.”
Ander barely slowed for the corner as we reached Hewston Street, drifting around it and racing through the quiet street faster than I could blink. It took literal seconds for us to end up on Blair street, and I relaxed more when Cruz announced our tail was quite far behind us.
We didn’t slow down until we’d almost reached Pine Valley and turned into the Heights, moving through street after street until we reached Benson Street.
My heart was pounding, and I was a little bit confused as to why my panties were damp.
Did I like this?
Ander hit a button and the garage door opened, forcing him to slow down and wait until we could pull inside.
He yanked the emergency brake on, making sure the garage door closed behind us before letting out a breath. “Will you hurt me if I say I enjoyed that?”
“Yes,” I practically panted, my body buzzing from the adrenaline rush.
“Worst experience of my life then,” he joked. “Cruz? Thanks, bro.”
“I’m going to start charging you per hour for bodyguard duty soon,” he replied with amusement. “I’ll drop Zav home in a few hours in one of our random cars to avoid someone following us.”
“See you later then,” Ander answered before hanging up and turning to me with a sinful grin as he switched the engine off. “Told you I wouldn't kill you.”
I unbuckled my seat belt and threw myself at him without a word, a needy feeling building inside me that I hadn’t experienced before. He was surprised but didn’t shove me back, one of his hands gently going to the back of my head to stop me from smacking it against the roof of the car.
There wasn’t much space in here, but he blindly reached for the lever to put the seat back a little more, tugging me into his lap to straddle him as I devoured his mouth.
“Bluebird, slow down,” he groaned, holding my hips to stop me rocking on him. “I don’t think?—”
“I don’t need you to think,” I answered as I kissed down his neck, my hand sliding towards his pants. Annoyingly, he stopped me.
“Yes, you do,” he huffed, fisting my hair and yanking me back a little harder than necessary. “Look at me. You hate me, remember? I have no problem fucking you, but I don’t want you to come down from this rush you’re on and accuse me of taking advantage.”
I leaned back and bumped the horn, startling myself, but he just grinned again as I tried to get control of my heart rate.
“I’ve never?—”
“Adrenaline rushes are wild. Racing and fucking kind of go hand in hand for a lot of people, just like fighting and fucking.”
I ground on him a little to try and relieve the feeling between my legs, a groan leaving me. “Can you die from being too horny?”
He laughed, his hand sliding to the back of my neck to tease my skin. “No, or everyone you know would be dead. Do you want me to get you off?”
I nodded, unsure what he wanted me to do. I felt stupid for wanting to ask, but he just slid a hand into my pants and teased my clit, encouraging me to lean back slightly. My hips jerked as he slipped a finger inside, a soft curse leaving him.
“You’re dripping, Bluebird. You liked going fast with me?”
My pussy clenched around his finger as I tried to find relief, but it wasn’t working fast enough. I ached, wanting more as I let out an annoyed moan. “It’s not working.”
“It’s been two seconds,” he said with amusement, grabbing the door with his free hand and shoving it open. “Hold onto me.”
He shifted to climb out, and I held on as his hand left my pants, my legs wrapping around his waist. He sat me on the edge of his hood and tugged my pants down my legs, almost making me slip right off the damn thing.
“What are you doing? I’ll dent?—”
“No, you won’t,” he said like I was crazy. “Lie back for me.”
I did without question, a thrill racing through me when he dropped to his knees and buried his tongue in my soaked pussy. This was exactly what I wanted.
My fingers tangled in his hair as I forced him closer, grinding against his face as I chased my orgasm, and a shriek left me when he grabbed my thighs firmly and practically motorboated my clit.
I came so fucking hard that I literally felt it shoot out of me.
“Fuck, that’s hot,” he exclaimed as he stood and wiped his mouth, staring at my pussy. I glanced down, finding wetness running down the hood.
“How’d you do that?” I panted, a cocky smirk taking over his face.
“You haven’t squirted before?”
“No. I kind of want to do it again,” I said with embarrassment, my pussy muscles still clenching with aftershocks. “Got any more fancy tricks?”
The sinister laugh that left him should’ve made me question it, but I knew he’d only do things that would feel good.
“I do. I’m asking you outright. Do you want me to fuck you?”
“If you make me come like that again, you can do whatever you want,” I grinned, barely getting the words out before he was pulling his shirt over his head and unbuckling his jeans. I eyed him hungrily, admiring his toned body as I imagined running my tongue over all the dips in his muscles. My eyes almost bugged out of my damn head when he kicked his boxers off to stroke himself and I saw the metal bars glinting in the garage light.
He gave me a knowing look, having no shame in holding his cock up so I could see the row of barbells under his shaft. I counted four, my eyes flicking up to his amused ones.
“Will I feel them?” I asked curiously, my breath catching as he stepped closer.
“Yeah. Not as well as you would if I fucked you raw, but they still make you come hard if I fuck you from behind. They rub your G-spot.” I went to move, but he stopped me. “I’ll flip you over when I’m ready. Right now, I want to see those pretty honey eyes widen as I stretch you.”
I blushed like an idiot, watching as he bent down to grab his wallet from his jeans. It was almost erotic as he rolled the condom on, taking his time to make sure it didn't catch on the piercings.
Once he was done, he tugged me towards the edge of the hood more and spat on my pussy, tingles moving through me as he rubbed his cock through it. I thought he’d been kidding about the eye contact, but once he was lined up and pushing inside, he held my gaze to watch my reaction.
I whimpered as my body opened for him, my eyes starting to flutter closed.
“Eyes on me,” he murmured, my body flushing at the command as I did as I was told.
He withdrew slightly before pushing in some more, feeling like forever passed before he was all the way in.
“You good?” he asked, waiting for me to nod before he started moving, his thumb going straight to my clit. I cursed, letting him hook my legs over his shoulders as he practically folded me in half and braced his hands on either side of me.
My hands were free, so I wrapped my arms around his neck to keep him close, not being able to breathe properly, but not really caring as he kissed me.
Once he knew my body was warmed up, his thrusts became more demanding and faster, giving me no choice but to cling on and let him slam into me.
I came twice in that position before he did as he’d promised and flipped me over, grabbing one of my knees to place it on the hood to keep me open as he fucked into me frantically.
The next orgasm hit me so hard I thought I was going to blackout.
Liquid dripped down my leg that was holding me up as he kept going until he let out the hottest fucking moan that I’d ever heard, his hips slowing as his cock throbbed inside me.
“Damn, Bluebird,” he panted, carefully easing out of me so he could bend down to grab his shirt. I thought he was getting dressed, but he started wiping at my legs and pussy, cleaning my juices from me.
“I like those piercings,” I said breathlessly, making him smirk.
“You can have them whenever you want. My body’s tingling. I don’t think I’ve come that hard since I lost my virginity.”
I knew he was just saying it, but it made me feel giddy.
He lifted me bridal style, making me scowl. “I can?—”
“I know you can. Let me,” he said as if I was being a nuisance, carrying me into the house and towards the bathroom. He put me down so he could turn on the shower, and I admired the scratches down his back from my nails.
He took his time washing me once he tugged me under the spray, washing himself before happily walking naked to his bedroom to find us some clothes.
I wanted to hate it, I really did, but I couldn’t.
Once we were dressed, he encouraged me to curl up on his lap under a blanket as he flicked the TV on, and I was asleep before he’d even picked a channel.