Chapter 17
Chapter Seventeen
Izzy
Iwake up wrapped in Xavier’s arms, his warmth pressed against mine as the morning sun streams through my window.
For the first time in forever, I feel complete.
Whole. Like my world finally makes sense.
His steady breathing brushes against my neck, and when he shifts, pulling me closer, my heart stutters. He’s mine. Finally, he’s mine.
A slow smile spreads across my lips, and I stretch slightly, savoring the feel of his skin against mine. His lips graze my neck, and a shiver races down my spine. My body hums with awareness, the deep ache from last night lingering in the most delicious way.
I let out a breathless giggle. “Morning. If that’s how I get woken up, I’ve really been missing out.”
Xavier chuckles, the sound vibrating through me. “Good morning. I’ve been thinking.”
I tilt my head to look at him, my fingers trailing lightly over his chest. “Thinking about what?”
His stormy blue eyes lock onto mine, intense and unreadable, his lips a mere breath away. “I’ve loved you for a very long time, but I’ve been a chicken shit,” he whispers.
My breath catches. Xavier loves me.
Before I can say anything, I grip his hair and pull him down, crashing my lips into his. My tongue tangles with his, and my body molds to his as if we were made for this. For each other. My fingers dig into his shoulders as I whisper against his lips, “Then show me.”
And he does. Xavier claims me completely, in a way he never has before. No barriers. No hesitation. Just us. When we finally collapse together, tangled in sheets and sweat, I feel it deep in my soul. This is where I belong. With him. Always.
Later, after reluctantly getting out of bed, we get dressed. I pull my hair into a messy bun, biting my lip as I watch Xavier button his jeans. The thought of him leaving, even for a few hours, twists my stomach.
He kisses me at the doorstep, lingering just a second longer than necessary. “I’ll text you later, okay?”
I nod, smiling up at him. “I’ll hold you to it.”
He walks off, and I lean against the doorframe, watching him get into his truck. My chest swells with happiness, a light, warm feeling filling me. This is real. We’re real.
A few minutes later, my phone buzzes.
Xavier: I love you.
My heart skips a beat, and I quickly type back, I love you more.
But he never responds.
Hours pass, and something feels off. At first, I push it aside, telling myself he needed space. But the longer I sit with it, the more uneasy I grow. A nagging worry settles in my chest, and my fingers grip my phone tightly as I stare at our last messages.
By the time the sun sets, my stomach is in knots. I try calling. No answer. Something is wrong.
I grab my keys and drive, following the pull in my gut.
It leads me straight to the racetrack. I spot Xavier’s truck parked in his usual spot, but he’s nowhere in sight.
When I step out of my Jeep, my heart hammers against my ribs.
The pits are lit by fluorescent lights, casting eerie shadows across the dirt and asphalt.
And then I see him. Xavier. My breath catches. He looks wrecked, his clothes wrinkled and his hair a mess. Like he’s been through hell.
A sick feeling washes over me.
He stumbles forward, unsteady on his feet, like he’s drunk or worse.
His shoulders slump, his movements sluggish, like he’s barely holding himself together.
When his eyes finally meet mine, they’re clouded, something dark and haunted unsteady beneath the surface.
My stomach clenches as dread coils deep in my gut.
This isn’t just exhaustion. It’s something else.
Something worse. And then I see it. A mark on his neck.
Red. Angry. Lipstick smeared along his collar.
No.
I shake my head and step back. “Are you fucking kidding me?” My voice cracks, barely above a whisper. Please tell me I’m wrong. Please. Tears spill down my cheeks before I can stop them.
Xavier opens his mouth, but nothing comes out. His lips part, and his hands twitch at his sides, yet he doesn’t deny it. He doesn’t fucking deny it.
I feel like I can’t breathe. Like the air has been ripped from my lungs.
Then I notice movement behind him. I look past Xavier, and my stomach drops. A woman. Smirking. Satisfaction gleaming in her cold, dead eyes.
My world shatters. A choked sob escapes me as I turn and run. I don’t care where. I need to get away. From him. From this.
The chilly night air burns in my lungs, but I don’t stop. I can’t. My boots pound the pavement, each step fueled by the desperate need to escape, to outrun the image burned into my mind. Xavier stands there, disheveled, wrecked, and marked by her.
That woman.
I barely saw her face. Just the cruel smirk, the satisfied gleam in her eyes. Like she had won. Like she knew exactly what she was doing when she stepped out from behind him, like she wanted me to see it.
Xavier called my name, but I didn’t stop. I didn’t look back. If I had, I would have broken. I wouldn’t have survived it.
I don’t remember getting home. Mia’s there, sitting on the couch with her legs tucked under her. The second I walk in, she looks up, her eyes widening. “Izzy? What the hell?”
I shake my head, moving past her, numb. I don’t answer when she follows me to my room, hovering like she’s afraid I’ll shatter. Maybe I already have.
I collapse onto my bed, burying my face in my pillow. I don’t cry. Not yet. I feel empty.
Mia sits beside me, her voice softer now. “What happened?”
I swallow the lump in my throat. “Xavier,” I whisper.
That’s all I need to say. She understands.
The next day, I throw myself into work, hoping the hum of an engine and the smell of oil will drown out the ache in my chest.
Mia’s with me in the garage, leaning against the workbench with arms crossed. She hasn’t left my side since last night. “You’re gonna have to talk about it at some point,” she says.
I shake my head, tightening the bolt on the engine I’m working on. “No, I don’t.”
Mia huffs. “Izzy…”
A car pulls up outside. I glance over my shoulder, wiping my hands on a rag, but the moment I see her step out, my stomach drops.
The bitch from last night. Nolan called me last night and told me her name is Marie. He was pissed about what happened.
She looks put together, perfectly composed, like she didn’t just tear my world apart last night. Like she didn’t smirk while my heart shattered.
Mia stiffens. “Who the hell is that?”
I don’t answer. I already know.
The bitch’s heels click against the pavement as she approaches. “Izzy.”
I cross my arms, masking the storm brewing in my chest. “What do you want?”
Her lips curve, but her gaze holds something almost pitiful. “I thought you should know,” she says. “I’m pregnant.”
My world tilts. I blink, her words slamming into me like a wrecking ball. “What?”
Marie exhales, as if this conversation is so hard for her. “It’s Xavier’s,” she continues, her voice gentle, a little too gentle, like she feels bad for me. Like she’s being the bigger person. “I found out a few weeks ago.”
A sharp ringing fills my ears. My stomach clenches, and the world around me warps as if I’ve been punched in the gut. The ground tilts. My stomach lurches, threatening to empty itself right here on the garage floor.
“No.” The word rips from my throat, raw and broken.
I grip the edge of the workbench so tight my fingers go numb, my nails digging into the metal, like if I let go, I’ll fall apart completely.
My lungs seize, refusing to pull in enough air.
I suck in a breath, but it’s jagged, painful, like I’m breathing in broken glass.
Mia steps forward, a hand hovering near my back like she’s afraid I’ll collapse. Maybe I will.
Marie tilts her head, eyes glittering with amusement. “Why would I lie?”
Something inside me snaps.
I lunge forward before I even realize what I’m doing. Mia’s arms wrap around me, holding me back as I struggle against her grip. My fury is white-hot and blinding. “You fucking…” My throat burns. I can’t breathe. I can’t see anything but her smirking face.
“Izzy, don’t,” Mia hisses, tightening her grip. “She’s not worth it.”
Marie takes a step back, clearly unbothered. “I thought you deserved to hear it from me.” She sighs, adjusting the strap of her designer bag. “But I think we both know what needs to happen next.”
I stop struggling. I already knew the second the words left her mouth.
Marie walks away, leaving the destruction she caused behind, and I turn to Mia. My voice is barely a whisper. “I have to go.”
Mia’s brows furrow. “Go where?”
I swallow the lump in my throat. “California.”
Mia’s whole body tenses. “Izzy, don’t…”
“I have to.” I cut her off. If I don’t leave now, I never will.
Mia shakes her head, stepping in front of me, her hands gripping my arms as if she can physically hold me here.
“Dammit, Izzy, don’t do this to yourself.
You love him! You don’t walk away from that!
” She grabs my arm, her nails digging in like she thinks she can hold me here.
“Please, just…just talk to him. Listen to him. Don’t let her be the only voice in this. ”
My throat tightens, and my chest aches so badly I think I might break apart. “What’s there to say?” My voice cracks. “He’s going to be a father, Mia.” I shake my head, forcing out a bitter laugh. “I can’t be in the way of that.”
Mia’s grip tightens. “You don’t know the full story. What if she’s lying? What if…”
“It doesn’t matter,” I whisper, shaking my head. I can’t do this.
I yank away, my breath coming too fast. “I’ve been accepted to that college in Los Angeles. It feels like fate is telling me it’s time to let go.” I inhale a shaky breath.
Mia’s eyes brim with frustration and something else, something close to heartbreak. But she sees it. She sees that I’ve already made up my mind. No matter how much I love him, this changes everything, and I can’t stay.
So I don’t. If I stay, I’ll drown in this. I leave, carrying the wreckage of my heart.