Chapter 12 #2
Alexi grits his teeth and stares down at his plate.
When she mentions her past horrors like they’re nothing, he sees red.
It’s a struggle to remain calm because all he wants to do is show her exactly what she’s been missing.
“That’s not true,” he tells her quietly.
“You’ve never been worshipped.” He looks up at her, struggling to get the words out past the blood roaring through his ears.
“You’ve been used. You’ve had things done to you.
But no one has ever worshipped your body or taught you what it is to be truly, purely desired. ”
Her voice small, Ulayna asks, “Why can’t you be the one to teach me?”
“Because I’m not sure I can,” he admits. “I’m not sure I can restrain myself from simply taking. And you’d let me, because it’s the only thing you know. But you’d hate me afterward.”
“What if you could? Restrain yourself, I mean. Would you teach me then?”
He shakes his head. Even sitting here having this conversation with her is trying the limits of his control. He feels like a caged animal.
He shoves to his feet, desperate to get away before he does something he’ll regret. Takes something he knows Ulayna isn’t ready to give.
“What if…” Ulayna hesitates. “What if you were physically restrained so that you couldn’t do more than I wanted? What if I were the one in control?”
His blood thumps thickly in his veins, and he has to grip the edges of the table to remain standing. “What, exactly, are you suggesting?” He doesn’t dare look at her, but he can feel her eyes on him.
“We tie you to a chair with your hands behind your back. That way, you can’t touch me. But… I can touch you.”
He lifts his head then and looks at her, really looks at her.
Her pupils are blown wide, her chest heaves with excited breaths, and her cheeks are flushed. She’s also gripping the table with white knuckles as if she too is struggling to hold herself back.
He fights to think past the sound of all his blood rushing south. “Is this truly what you want? A way to safely explore your sexual desires… with me?”
“Yes,” she admits. “I’ve been learning what I like with toys from Silk & Secrets, but I want to learn what it’s like with a man. And I choose you.”
Alexi groans, his knees nearly giving out at the thought.
“But,” she says, “I only want you to do this if you really want to. It’s important to me that consent goes both ways. If you don’t want to—”
He cuts her off with a harsh laugh. “Trust me, Ptichka, there’s nothing I don’t want from you.”
She bites her lip and blushes, but holds his stare.
Before he can think better of it or change his mind, he says, “Come with me to my office.”
Her eyes widen in surprise and excitement, and he can’t help the dark chuckle that bursts across his lips.
He turns on his heel and strides quickly down the hallway to his office, Ulayna following after him.
“Lock the door,” he commands once they’re inside.
Ulayna quickly obeys, and he struggles to push down the arousal that spikes through him at that.
This is about her, not him. He’ll give her what she needs, whatever that might be. Even if he has to suffer through hours of an aching cock with no release. He’ll let her take what she needs from him.
He walks around his desk and pulls open drawers until he finds what he’s looking for and pulls out a coil of rope.
Ulayna’s eyebrows rise in question. “Do I even want to know why you have rope in your office?”
“Probably not,” he says darkly.
From the other side of the room, he pulls a chair toward her. He hands her the rope and steps back. “You’re in control of everything that happens from this moment on,” he tells her. He smirks and opens his arms wide. “I am yours to command and do with as you please.”
Ulayna takes a deep breath, and he doesn’t miss the fact that she presses her thighs together as if trying to ease an ache there. She’s excited by this. And if he’s being honest with himself, so is he.
He has never, never given up control like this. But for his little bird, he’s happy to do it. More than that, he’s truly turned on by the idea of her using his body for her own pleasure. His aching cock is proof of that.
He sits down in the chair facing her and waits.
“Take…” Ulayna stammers, then finds her resolve. “Take your clothes off,” she orders.
Slowly, enjoying the anticipation in her eyes, he does as she commands.
His fingers work the buttons of his dress shirt, exposing his chest and stomach inch by inch. With deft fingers, he unclasps his cuff links and slips the sleeves down his arms.
His shirt falls to the floor beside him. Ulayna’s soft inhalation is music to his ears.
Unceremoniously, he toes off his shoes and socks. Reaching for his belt, he pauses one more time. He has to make sure. He could never live with himself if he inadvertently pressured her into this.
“Are you sure?” he asks.
“Yes,” she breathes. “I want to see you naked. You saw me naked and touched me. Now it’s my turn.”
He gives her a cocky grin and slides his belt undone. He flicks the button of his dress slacks open and slides the zipper down. Lifting his hips, he shucks his pants down his thighs and kicks them off.
The tight, elastic fabric of his boxer briefs does nothing to hide his erection.
He slips his thumbs into the waistband of his briefs, ready to push them down, too. But suddenly, Ulayna says, “Wait!”
He freezes.
“I want to be the one to take them off you,” she says as if surprised at herself.
He didn’t think it was possible to become more aroused, but when the rest of his blood arrows straight to his dick, he realizes he was wrong. His cock jumps at the idea, and he can feel precum leaking from the tip.
“Sit down,” Ulayna commands as she unspools the coil of rope and steps around behind him.
Eagerly, he sits and moves his hands to the back of the chair so she can bind his wrists together.
She circles back in front of him, dragging her fingers along his shoulders and chest. “If I do anything you don’t like,” she says, “promise you’ll tell me. I want us both to enjoy this.”
“There is nothing you could do to me that I wouldn’t enjoy,” he says, trying to reassure her.
She shakes her head. “What they taught us in the Program was… thorough. Not everyone enjoys all of it.”
Cold fury races through him at the thought. “Look at me, Ulayna,” he demands.
She meets his eyes, unflinchingly.
“Forget what you learned in the Program. This has nothing to do with that. This is about you discovering what brings you pleasure. If this never goes any further than you eye-fucking me, I’ll be happy. If you want to touch me, kiss me, bite me… Hell, if you want to whip me, I’ll be happy.”
“Whip you? Why the fuck would I want to whip you?”
Alexi shrugs as best he can with his arms tied behind him. “If it brings you pleasure, then it will bring me pleasure. I want nothing else.”
She shakes her head. “I don’t think I want to whip you. But I do want to touch you. And see you… All of you.”
“Help yourself,” he says, settling back into the chair.
She steps forward again and lets her hands run down his sides. He jumps a little, and his muscles twitch when her fingers trail across his ribs.
“Ticklish?” she asks.
He growls low in his throat. “Even you’re not that cruel.”
She laughs, but moves her hands to his front, stroking his pecs. She flicks his nipple and watches in fascination as it hardens under her touch.
He’s hard everywhere, and the feeling is divine under her fingers.
His breath speeds up as she runs her fingers down the divots and ridges of his abs, strokes the V above his hips, disappearing beneath his briefs. Her hands ghost over the dark fabric to trace the outline of his stiff cock pressing against the material.
She cups him, squeezing gently, and he can’t help the low groan that escapes. She smiles wickedly and increases the pressure for a few seconds.
He watches impatiently as she tugs his briefs down, and he lifts his hips to help remove the cloistering fabric. Finally, he springs free, his cock slapping against his belly with the force of his arousal. His briefs fall to the floor, and he kicks them off so that he is finally, gloriously naked.
Ulayna kneels at his feet. With a teasing look, she loops the rope around each ankle, securely restraining him to the legs of the chair.
Then she gently, reverently explores him.
As her hands glide over and around his shaft and massage his aching sack, he has to clench his teeth.
His hips buck, seeking more pressure, and he realizes it’s a damn good thing he’s tied to the chair.
Her slow exploration is sublime torture.
She moves lower and presses a kiss to the tip of his cock, and it jumps in her grasp. She looks at him as if in awe, then slides her lips around him.
“Oh god. Oh fuuuck.” He can’t stop staring at the sight of his cock disappearing into her luscious mouth. “Wait, Ulayna.” He pants. “I don’t… You…”
She looks up at him with big, hungry eyes, his cock still half buried in her mouth.
He swallows past the lump in his throat and tries again. “You don’t have to do that.”
She pulls back, and he slides out of her mouth with a wet plop. “You don’t want me to give you a blow job?”
He digs deep for some measure of control to keep himself still. And to keep from demanding that, yes, more than anything, he wants that. He wants her to shove him so deep down her throat she gags.
He groans and tries to shut out the mental image. Not easy when her lips are still inches from him, and her small hands are still wrapped around his shaft.
“Fuck, yes, I want that, Ulayna,” he says, his voice a dark growl. “But I only want you to do what you want. Don’t do anything just to please me.”
Ulayna’s expression turns contemplative. “I’m enjoying myself,” she says, then sucks him back into her mouth.