14. Amber
14
AMBER
I never knew it could be like this, and it isn’t just the sex – which is completely incredible — but the way Bronco takes charge without being demanding or overbearing, it’s like something out of one of my romance books. Things like this don’t happen to people in real life. Okay, he fucked me into next week, but he wasn’t rough, and he kept asking me how I was feeling, and if I was okay. Guys don’t do that — not that I’ve been with that many — but I’ve had enough experience to know that it isn’t the case. It’s like Bronco takes this job as seriously as he does all the other important things in his life.
Now, as I ride him — my hands splayed out on his chest as he holds my hips — rocking me back and forth on his huge dick, I feel completely in control. I feel… powerful. That’s how he makes me feel. Plus, I never knew this man was such a dirty talker in the bedroom. It’s so sexy. If this is his idea of vanilla, I’ll take it.
“Fuck, baby,” he groans. Even this, me moving slowly on top of him, isn’t rushed or frantic; it’s controlled and delicious. He’s hitting me so deep inside, I’m seeing stars. I had no clue that dicks could really be that big and be enjoyable, but he did make sure I was fully warmed up beforehand. Something I’m now appreciating.
“So good,” I agree. “So fucking good.”
He sits up, bringing our bodies closer. Closing his lips around my puckered, needy nipple, he groans when he suckles. The rhythm is perfect; a slow, rolling of the hips and a thrust at the end. He has me right on the edge, and I can’t get enough. My clit brushes against his pubic bone over and over, and it’s keeping me right there. I know when I orgasm again, it’s going to be mind blowing.
“Ride me.” He licks my nipple like the dirty man he is, then moves his attention to the other side. “Ride this big cock, AJ. Your pretty pussy ain’t ever gonna go back now.”
“Back to what?” I breathe. “Having sex with my bullet?”
He kisses his way over the tops of my breasts, then my neck, then covers my jaw in kisses as I bounce like fucking him is the only thing that matters in the world. And right now, it is. Right now, I’m his queen, and it feels so fucking perfect.
“You’ve missed dick, haven’t you?”
“I’ve missed this dick, clearly,” I pant. “It’s nothing like the other?—”
He holds a finger up to my mouth. “Let’s not talk about fuckin’ other men while I’m doin’ you.”
“I just meant, this is rocking my world.”
He grins against my skin, pressing a kiss to my lips. “It’s rockin’ mine too, bestie.”
“This is so bad,” I groan.
“Bad?”
“Us!”
“Doesn’t feel that way to me. It feels very right.”
“I know.” I run my hands over his pecs, loving how he feels beneath my fingertips. “It does, and I’ve got to look at you in daylight and pretend like none of this happened.”
“But we’re fake datin’,” he reminds me. “So we could keep it up.”
“Keep up fake datin’? Or keep up… this?”
“You think you can give this up?” He balks. “I’ll be honest, baby, I can’t.”
My world rocks all over again. “Friends with benefits?”
“Better. Best friends with benefits.”
“Right there,” I groan as he plucks my nipples with his fingers, cupping them and squeezing them together. I start to come undone.
“Ride it, baby. Show me how much this pussy loves my cock.”
Oh, my.
“Bronco!” I yell, tipping my head back as my orgasm explodes. “Yes, yes, yes!”
He watches me fall apart, a smirk on his face that will stay embedded into my brain for the rest of time. Oh, he’s quite pleased with himself, and so he should be. I’ve lost count now how many times he’s made me come. We had a ten minute breather, then our hands wandered, and here we are.
“You look so fuckin’ sexy when you lose control,” he breathes against my skin. “You make me crazy.”
“You’re an expert at getting me worked up,” I say, my breathing ragged.
“I like to think I’m talented.”
“More than talented.”
“Why, thank you.”
He doesn’t let up. Instead, he moves his hands down to my waist and our mouths find each other. We’re all tongues. It’s so illicit, so bad ass, and the wild abandon side of my nature is digging it. More than he could ever know. “And anyway,” he goes on. “If we say we’re datin’, even though we’re not, it’ll keep everyone off our backs.”
I immediately jump on the defensive in my mind: does he not want people to know? Is he ashamed of me? Am I good enough? But I squash all those thoughts down. Bronco isn’t like that, and he’s right in a way; the women of the club are nosy. They’ll want to know all the details, and once they know, they’ll switch their attention to something else. Maybe this friends with benefits thing could really work out? Especially if I get sex like this on the regular. Regular? I want to facepalm myself. He’s still inside me, and I’m already overthinking this entire situationship, which is what this is in a nutshell.
“You may have a point.” I gasp when he lays down, tilts my hips, and rocks up into me.
I don’t just see stars this time; I am the damn stars. He fills me to the hilt, then lifts me off. There’s more pressure than before, and then he moves faster. It’s so good, every single fire is alight inside me as we fuck. Up, down. Up, down. His hand grips my ass, the other one still resting on my hip as I go into sensory overload. And it is so fucking good.
“AJ!” he cries. “Better come because I’m barely holdin’ on.”
His words are my undoing as I tumble again, loudly. Gripping his shoulders, I pound down on him, rocking my hips into his as we moan and groan our way through another orgasm.
He stills, and I can feel the spurts of his cum shooting inside me as I slow my hips. I collapse against his chest, panting like I just ran a marathon. “Holy shit, we’re gonna fuck each other to death.”
He grins against my cheek. “Not a bad way to go.”
I wrap around his body, snuggling into his neck as I breathe him in. He still has the same sexy pine scent with a hint of musk, but now it’s mingled with sex. I swear, if I could bottle it, I’d be a millionaire. He’s the epitome of sex on a stick.
“I know I’m gonna be paying for that tomorrow,” I groan.
He kisses the top of my head. “Because my big dick broke you?”
“I haven’t had sex in a long time, two years—” It was a one-night thing and I didn’t enjoy it.
“I’ll take that as a compliment.”
“You should, because I know enough to realize that you’re a stud between the sheets.”
He chuckles beneath me. “Are you just buttering me up so we can go another round?”
“Another?” I gasp. “Really?”
“Don’t sound so shocked. I can go all night. Just need a little minute to recover, then I’m good to go again.”
“You’re insane,” I tell him. “I’m going to need recovery time.”
“That tight pussy loves it.” Oh, his dirty words. “You know it, and I know it.”
“Shut up, fake boyfriend , or I won’t cook you breakfast in the morning.”
He traces circles on my back. “I don’t expect you to cook for me.”
“I want to, it’s the least I could do.”
“Like a down payment?”
I laugh. “Something like that. I know my vibrator can’t work like that mouth can.”
“You liked that, huh?”
“Mmhmm, I think we both know I more than liked it, Bronc.”
“So I could be your cabana boy after all.” He smirks.
I know he doesn’t want a girlfriend, he’s said as much over the years. Even if he has hinted at the idea of settling down, I don’t know if he’s truly ready for that. He’s never had a real relationship before, not a serious one, so how could he know it’s what he wants? And with my past forever haunting me, I’m not sure it’s what I want. How would I know when all I’ve known since I was sixteen is violence. I’ve never known what love is, not truly, or if it even exists. Even when around the MC… I see and feel all of the love the men have for their women, and vice-versa. It’s evidence that love is very much alive and well. Still, I can’t shake how I feel.
I try not to think about that now. I don’t want to ruin the happy moment I’m having being in my best friend's arms, trying not to overthink every damn thing about him that I’ve overlooked all this time.
Not only is he the sweetest man on the planet, as well as kind and thoughtful, he’s got a body made for riding.
“Or you could tell me why a guy like you has been single for so long?” He mentioned he hadn’t had sex in six months, which is quite a long time when I’ve seen him in action over the years. I have to admit, Bronco is one of the nicest guys in the MC. He’s never treated a woman badly, none of the guys have, but he’s always been upfront about it, and the girls knew what to expect. It’s why sweet butts hang around, after all. I’ve never heard any of them say anything bad about him.
“I just haven’t met the right woman.”
“So, that’s the reason?” I laugh. “Who knew?”
He bumps me with his hips. “Smart ass. I could ask the same thing about you, but now I know a little more about your past, I can see why.”
Tears spring to my eyes. I’ve talked about this with Audrina briefly in a moment of panic, but not to him. Now we’re this close, I want to tell him everything.
The good. The bad. The ugly.
“I’m sure you can understand why. Living in a religious cult isn’t exactly screaming a happy, perfect life.”
“How did you get into it in the first place?”
I sigh. “My brother. After our mom died, he was my sole guardian when dad took off. He’d always been fascinated with shit like that, and when he met Vince at a church meet, he got the idea to join Vince’s little posse.” I shudder at the memory. “And it was fine for a while, good, even. They had houses, a village, their own produce; a little like the Amish, but with electricity.”
“How old were you when you were married?”
I hold my breath. “I?—”
“You can tell me. None of this is your fault. You said you were fourteen when you moved?”
He has a good memory. I wonder what he’ll think of the next words out of my mouth.
“I was sixteen.”
“What the fuck?” He shifts, looking up at me as I try to bury further into his neck. “Amber?”
“I thought Vince was so charming,” I whisper. “And he was good to me at first. Funny. Handsome. He always had a big, warm smile, and he treated me like a princess. But after we ‘married’, things slowly changed, especially when…”
His hands still on my back. “Especially when, what?”
I swallow hard. “After I had two miscarriages and couldn’t get pregnant again. In their church, that’s considered the work of the devil. He’d accuse me of cheating on him, he was crazy, paranoid, often leaving me for days at a time to indulge in the other women in the sect, drinking all night, coming home with a different woman….”
“Did he ever hit you?”
I’ve hidden enough from him, and I won’t lie anymore. “Yes.”
His sharp intake of breath has me wanting to retreat, but I need to do this. He needs to know some of what happened, then maybe he’ll see why I am the way I am. Why I’ll never get married again, have a family, or probably settle down. I never want to be controlled ever again.
“I’m sorry, baby. I’m sorry he did that to you.”
“My brother didn’t care,” I whisper. “We’d never really gotten along, but I thought he’d stick up for me, tell Vince to lay off me, but he didn’t. They both have multiple wives, and Erica was scared for Olive. Hell, I was scared; it’s the main reason we decided to leave Illinois.”
“This is insane, AJ. No wonder you ran for your life.”
“Yeah.”
“What’s the name of the religious group?”
I shake my head. “No, I’m not telling you that.”
He lifts my chin. “Because you know I’ll kill him, and your brother.”
“Yes, that’s exactly the reason. Like I said before, I don’t want you going to jail. It’s not worth it.”
“But what about all the other girls he could prey on?”
My eyes blur with tears when I think about that. “I know, trust me, that’s the part that haunts me, and the women who are being used and manipulated who don’t see it. One of my brother’s wives tried to stop us the day we ran away.” I tell him briefly what happened and his arms tighten around me.
“Even back then, you were a tough little cookie. I’m glad you knocked that bitch out.”
“I wanted to do more,” I admit. “I was so angry. She almost blew everything. I’d worked so hard to line this up, stash money away so we could get a bus to anywhere, and it was almost all for nothing.”
“But you made it out,” he reminds me. “You survived.”
“Since then, Erica has always been talking about trying to bring them down. She can’t let it go. It’s got me worried that she may have started something.”
“We need to talk to Star ASAP. Give me the name of the cult, I’ll find a way?—”
“No, Bronco. I know what you’ll do, and I don’t want that on my conscience.”
“Why not? He doesn’t seem to have one, or your brother.”
I know his words are true, but I still couldn’t stomach being the instigator of someone’s death knowingly. I’m just not made that way. I know Bronco thinks I’m some kind of badass, but that isn’t 100% true. I have doubt, worry, and fear all the fucking time.
“I know, but I want to handle this myself. I promise if I need your help, or if Star can’t get any trace of Erica, then I’ll tell you, but you have to promise me you won’t do anything.”
“Not gonna promise that,” he says. “I’ll fuckin’ cut his throat in front of his entire family if we ever come face to face.”
And that’s exactly what I was worried about. I know he would. Bronco isn’t just the big, oafy nice guy with a heart of gold. He loves hard, and if you hurt someone he cares about, you will suffer horribly. It’s how he’s made. I’m no stranger to what goes on in the MC, and while the club is legit and everyone works in their businesses, I’m also fully aware the club has done illegal things in the past. People have disappeared. Mafia and rival MC club wars have broken out. So-called drug fueled shootings on the news have been unsolved, or blamed on gangs, but I know the MC was involved. I’ve often reasoned with myself; if they only kill the bad guys, is that really considered a sin? I’m not deeply religious these days, but I still believe there is something higher than all of us. I also believe that bad people should be taken from the earth, unable to breathe the same air as us, or hurt anyone else. I do believe in vigilante justice to a degree, but Bronco is too close to this. The fear of him getting caught and locked away is too much for my heart to bear.
“Please don’t say that,” I chide. “It makes me nervous. I’m sure he’ll get what’s coming to him. In fact, I believe it strongly.”
“So he has no way of knowing where you are, right? You haven’t contacted your brother or anyone else?”
I shake my head. “No. I never had a phone, so he could never contact me. I even changed my legal name.”
“Were you always Amber?”
“Yes, just my last name.”
He starts to stroke my shoulder again. “I hate that you suffered.”
“It made me stronger.”
“Even so. That shit ain’t right. The fact that you escaped means they held you captive?”
I sigh. “Not in so many words. We were free to go around the village, but it was blocked off with a huge gate and fences to keep us in, and others out.”
“Sounds like a prison,” he huffs.
“It was in a lot of ways. Though, you have to understand, most of the people there want to be there. They have no reason to leave because it’s what they want, or think it’s what they want.”
“How could anyone want that?”
“I was a child, I had no choice in the matter,” I say. “And by the time I was old enough to know any better, I was brainwashed. That’s what they do.”
“It’s sick.”
“Yes, it is, but here we are.”
He’s silent for a while, then, “I’m a little mad you didn’t tell me this sooner.”
I laugh without humor. “You think I want to relive it? To have you do your own private investigation just to seek revenge?”
“No, but it’s me.” He really sounds hurt. “We’ve known each other for ages, and this is the first time you’ve ever mentioned a cult.”
“A part of me still lives in fear of him, and my brother. I was convinced they’d seek retribution for what we did. But as the years passed, I realized that finding us would be like finding a needle in a haystack,” I say. “They also wouldn’t leave home for long periods of time, so in a way, I knew we’d be safe if we could get out of Illinois.”
His voice sounds hoarse when he speaks next. “I hate that you had to run in fear of your life, constantly lookin’ over your shoulder.”
I lift up and stroke one side of his face. “That’s over now. They can’t hurt me, I promise.”
He doesn’t look convinced, but he takes my head in both his hands. “I won’t let them.”
I know he means it. I don’t need any reminders of what he’s capable of when it comes to violence, but when it’s toward people who commit crimes, I’ve no issue with it in the slightest.
It’s then I realize he’s still inside me. We’ve been lying here talking about my past, and this hulk of a man is still buried deep.
As if just realizing it himself, he smirks. “You like havin’ me between those pretty thighs, don’t you, babe?”
I roll my eyes. “You’re not bad.”
His eyebrows raise. “Not bad?” He rolls me over and I squeal, laughing as he pulls all the way out. “Ever fucked in the shower?”
“I can’t say I have.”
“Want to?”
“You really are insatiable.” It’s not a question. He’s a freaking stallion.
He grins. “How is your fake, vanilla boyfriend doin’ so far?”
I swing my arms around his neck. “He’s the best I’ve ever been with.”
He kisses me slowly. “Glad to hear it.” He lifts himself up, offering me his hand. “Let’s see how many positions we can do in one night.”
I laugh. “You’ll be the death of my vagina, you know that, right?”
My eyes dip to his ass as he turns. “There are worse ways to go, Princess.”