Chapter 14
Chapter 14
BEAU
I ’ve been on edge waiting for the society to tell me what’s next and they seem to have gone silent. I know there’s more coming because I still have a key I’ve never used. Not to mention, I’m dreading how fucking hard it’s going to be to keep my distance from Iris. She’s obviously still going to be mad at me and I don’t blame her. But fuck if her hot temper doesn’t get me going.
I watched her with King by the pool and she’s different with him. She’s soft and quiet, always smiling. I’ve earned my share of her smiles in the past but not as constant as I saw on her face just now. Maybe it was for show . Maybe she’s trying to make me jealous in hopes I’ll feel like shit for the way I treated her, or maybe she can see King for who he really is. He’s good at hiding himself from others, but if you look close enough, he has two different sides to him.
Too bad, Kens. I don’t need you for that.
The last I heard from him he was being extra vague, so I’m confident he’s doing something for the society. My gut twitches thinking about everything that happened the night I got a similar text and I hate that he’s going alone. I wish they’d let us use our resources to get whatever they want done instead of controlling every aspect of the process. We’re stronger together, we always have been, but in the end, I get it.
With this kind of shit going on, the Brotherhood has to be careful. One wrong move and an entire society, older than our great-grandfathers, could crumble. I’m sure there are too many big dogs in the house for something like that to happen, but it still makes you wonder. One day I’ll understand it all better and maybe then it’ll make sense.
He’d texted earlier, asking me to keep an eye on Iris. If he only knew I’ve been doing that already, I don’t need a request coming from him to make sure she’s safe when I can’t seem to get her off my mind.
Female giggles in the hallway pull me from my thoughts and have me reaching for my doorknob within seconds. I open the door to a stumbling Iris and on instinct I’m reaching for her. With a quick glance over my shoulder, I make sure no one else is watching us and tug her into the privacy of my room.
“What the fuck, Kens?” I scold. She’s being careless and noisy. This place may seem safe, but there are still too many unknowns for her not to give a fuck.
“What? I’m just here to see you guys.” She stumbles over her feet, using the wall to catch herself all while wearing a wide grin.
“You’re drunk.”
“Something like that.” She puts her index finger over my lips to quiet me. I can smell the sweet liquor on her fingertip, making me want to taste it. “Shhh. They’ll hear.”
“Who will hear?”
“Them.” She looks around the ceiling of my room and drives home the feelings I’ve felt since I got here. People are watching. They’re always watching and I’m sure this interaction will come back to haunt me. I have to tell King, see if he’s noticed the same thing.
She hiccups and a look of frustration flashes over her face. “Oh, wait. I’m mad at you, Beau Beaumont. You’re a mean liar.” She’s feisty yet fucking adorable.
“Here. Sit on the bed before you fall and hurt yourself.” I guide her to the edge of my bed and step back until I’m leaning against the wall. I need to put space between us; it’s too hard to keep my hands off of her when we’re close.
“Yes. You’re a liar.” I don’t encourage her to share her thoughts, but she continues anyway. “You called me a slut and I’ve only ever been with two people, Beau Beaumont. Let’s count how many you’ve been with. I bet we can’t even use our fingers and toes to count and it be enough. Who’s the slut, now?” She bends over to take off her shoes as if she’s about to use them to help her count.
She’s right. I’ve definitely made my rounds and I am a fucking liar. And I wish like hell I could tell her why I’ve pushed her away… but I can’t. It’s a burden I’m having to live with even if it kills me inside to do so.
“Ok… there was me… that blonde girl when we were at the theater as kids. The one at the park the first night I saw you.” She huffs, shooting me a little irritated glare, before remembering the next. “The one in the mall the day after that.” She stops to think and before I stop her, she yells, “Oh! Let’s not forget the one in your truck on prom night. Real classy, that one. Lemme borrow your fingers and we’ll keep going…”
“Shhh. Okay. You made your point.”
“Don’t shush me. I’m here to say what I want to say. I’m my own woman, Beau Beaumont, and I can talk.” I nod knowing if I told her to stop, she’d only get louder, maybe toss some shit at me as well. And a sick part of me likes having her sassy mouth tell me off. “There’s that one girl, Cassandra... Cassie. Wait, no. Her name was Candy or something like that. You hurt me, Beau. You said mean things and I don’t know if I’ll ever forgive you for that.” Her lower lip trembles with her admission, making the knife twist a little more in my heart.
“Who was your second?” I regret asking the second the words come out of my mouth. I don’t want to know this shit, but I’m a glutton for punishment. If she says a guy named Jordan, I’ll want to kill him again. If she doesn’t say Jordan… I’ll still want to kill him all over again.
“Just a guy in Georgia.” Fuck. “He was a tool and I hate him too. Just like you, Beau.”
“No, Kens. I’m nothing like any guy from fucking Georgia.” I move to pick up some of my clothes in hopes of changing the subject and distracting her. She stands and bumps into me as I pass and so help me my body lights with fire over every single inch she grazed.
I turn to see her head lowered and sadness written all over her face. “Why can’t you love me?” she whispers and my heart fucking sinks. I brush my finger under her chin and make her look at me. She has no clue just how deep my feelings run for her. It’d scare her if she had any real idea.
“I do love you. I fucking love you so much that I’d drop everything for you. I’d defy my entire fucking family… the society and the goddamn world for you. I’d even betray my fucking best friend for you… I already have. And that makes you dangerous.” She leans her head against my chest and my hands automatically brush up and down her back while her fingers rub over the soft cotton of my shirt. I catch her scent being this close, the smell driving me wild for her. Can’t she see how difficult all this is for me?
“You’re the dangerous one. You’ve got me so wrapped up in what you guys are doing that I can’t think past the two of you. How am I supposed to do this without you, Beau?”
“Do what?”
“Life.” Her weighted confession has me drawing in a swift breath. I push her from my chest, hating the distance, but needing it to meet her gorgeous eyes.
“You need to sleep this off.”
“Hold me while I sleep.” She tries to nuzzle up against my chest again, but I keep her in place.
“I can’t do that.” It would be too easy to give in and take what I want. However, I’ve never chosen the easy route in life and I just saw her with King. That means something to me, he’s my best friend.
“Why not?”
“Because I know you’re talking to King now.”
“That doesn’t mean we can’t talk. ”
“Kens… you need to go home. Go home and get some sleep. I promise you’ll hate me again tomorrow.”
“I hate you right now.” She says it, but she doesn’t mean it. Things would be a lot simpler if she did.
“I know. Come on… let’s get you home.” I take her arm in my hand and guide her to the door. She goes willingly and doesn’t say another word until we’re outside.
“You know there’s room in my heart for both of you. And I know there’s a lot going on right now with school just starting up… but I’m not going to give up on us, Beau. I’m not going to let you throw everything away because you’re too scared to stand up for what you want.” I stop in my tracks while she continues to walk. I stare at her, watching her sloppy steps as she calls, “I can get myself back to my room. I hate you, remember?” I’m starting to believe she keeps repeating it to remind herself to hate me, because even she doesn’t believe those words.
The girl I love walks across both our back lawns, past fifty or so half-naked obnoxious drunk girls now screaming and making out in the pool, and finally, through the back door of her sorority house. Not once did I allow my eyes to divert from her retreating form. I had to soak in every second I got of her.
She’s my entire focus. Always.
I can’t go to class without wondering about her. I can’t fucking shower without thinking about how I’ve never taken one with her and then I catch myself thinking about all the other things we’ve never done before. I can’t go to sleep without looking out my window to make sure she’s home safe. Then I can’t sleep, because I’m so fucking sexually frustrated that I resort to jacking off to the memories of how she felt, naked in my bed.
Some would say she’s become my obsession. And I agree.
A shrill scream from one of the party girls being dunked, finally snaps me out of my stupor and I remember that King hasn’t made it home yet. I need to make sure I’m still awake when he gets back tonight. It’s time we have a serious talk without anyone else in earshot. I have to keep in mind I can’t trust that anything around here isn’t bugged.
KINGSTON
After the initiation test, I stripped down, and we burned my clothes next to the dead man who’d bled out at my feet. The older guy who had given me the task had placed a light gray robe the same color as the jewels in the dagger on my shoulders. I’m not completely in yet, but the Brotherhood of Darkness acknowledged me tonight and rewarded me with a robe to match them. Granted, mine is a different color than theirs, but it’s a step in the right direction.
Hunter-green robe guy walked me back to the parking area after another member had given him some sweats, which he then offered me once we were back at my car. I had to leave my robe behind but was promised I’d have it again while going through certain tasks until the induction process was complete.
Anticipation, anxiety, and confusion took over my mind the entire drive back to campus. I wanted to be pleased and proud at completing another level, but I’m aware I shouldn’t feel such a way after taking a man’s life. I’ve killed in the past, but there’s always been a reason, some sort of threat or whatever I’d been pushed to get rid of and it was mostly done without witnesses or any evidence left behind. What happened in the woods earlier felt nothing like the other deaths had—this time I was killing to gain the respect of who knows how many people.
Parking my car, I instantly glance around, feeling like someone’s watching. They always are, right? The various masked faces have proven my suspicions to be true—they’ve just stopped hiding their presence from me. They want me to see them, to know I’m always being tested in some way. I wonder if it’s the real reason they had me kill for them tonight? One of them witnessed what I did to Matthew, and they probably wanted to see if I’d kill again just as easily. I proved I will.
Pulling up Iris’ number, I shoot off a text.
Me
I can’t stop thinking about you in another sexy dress. Got any other colors to show me?
She has a sparkly red number I’d love to see her in for sure. She had several other colors in her closet, but that one stood out. The thought of Iris’ creamy skin next to all those sparkles as I shove the material up and over her hips, then follow the trail with my tongue, has me wishing it wasn’t so late. She’s probably already done her nightly routine and tucked into bed to watch a movie. I’d offer to be her bed warmer, but I really need to talk to Beau. I may just have to slip in beside her once my conversation with Beau is over.
Punching in my house code, I step through the door to a fairly empty downstairs. A few are in the kitchen and living room, but I’m sure the other younger guys are upstairs jacking off or whatever they do in the evenings. The juniors and seniors who are society members are probably still at the park. Bypassing the others, I stride straight for Beau’s room. I’ve wanted to call him from the moment I got in my car, but who the hell knows if my phone or car are being bugged. I highly doubt they want me spilling details to my best friend when we haven’t been through the entire process yet.
My fist barely hits the door before he’s opening it and tugging me inside.