Chapter 18 Wanting So Many Things
I hate it when Oliver and Mason fight. I hate the way Mason provokes him, and I hate how pointless and unneeded I feel in the crossfire of their arguments.
When I get back to the kitchen, Mason is gone, but I keep thinking about the fight even as Oliver and I eat the chicken parmesan he made us for dinner. My thoughts swirl around and around until I can’t take it anymore.
“What’s wrong with him?” I blurt out.
Oliver raises a brow. “What’s wrong with him? He’s an asshole. Didn’t I already tell you that?”
Yeah, and I believed you, but that was before I started sleeping with him and saw how careful and attentive he can be. Almost sweet. Sweet in a filthy, inappropriate way, but still.
Oliver frowns as he takes another bite of the chicken. “I’m telling you, Lane, stay away from him.”
“I am.” My gaze drops to my plate. I hate lying. I hate it so much. But I just don’t see any other way. If Oliver found out, he’d be livid with me. He wouldn’t want me to stay at his house anymore if he knew I snuck into his brother’s room every night and, um, let him do all sorts of stuff to me.
I poke sullenly at my food. Even though it’s tasty, I don’t have much of an appetite.
Is Mason really that bad of a person? He keeps provoking Oliver and treating him unfairly, but he’s not like that with me.
They obviously have some baggage, beyond the usual brotherly squabbles.
It’s not my place to delve deeper and try to solve it, but it still rubs me the wrong way that my best friend and the guy I sleep with dislike each other so much.
Mason can’t be all bad. He’s not the best person in the world, I know; he’s been to prison, for fuck’s sake.
I don’t care about that, but picking fights with my best friend is different.
Maybe I should try to minimize our encounters even more than I already do.
Maybe I should stop letting him mark me with hickeys, even though I love it.
I should stop it all around, to be fair, but I’m obviously not going to do that.
I’m not the best at setting boundaries and sticking to them, though. The very existence of the forbidden fling between Mason and me is proof of that.
Oliver and I spend the rest of the day in his room, farming materials for a weapon upgrade. I hear the telltale thuds from the garage, so I figure I’m safe to venture into the kitchen to get us a couple of drinks.
Apparently, I waited too long. As I cross the hallway, Mason comes up the stairs, sweaty and shirtless, fresh from the gym.
I try not to acknowledge him, to just pass him. His bulk takes up the space of the narrow hallway, and I try to sideline him and slip past, but he moves effortlessly to the side when I do, blocking me.
I glare up at him to see his mouth tilted in a smirk.
“Going somewhere, puppy?”
“Let me pass.” I try to keep my voice steady, but the frustration paired with the anxious anticipation of what he’s planning is getting to me.
When I try to force myself past, Mason switches our positions, and I find myself pressed face-first against the wall.
He leans in, and his sweaty bulk covering my back overshadows my whole world. His scent takes me back to last night, when he was inside me. How his abs rippled and his grunts filled my ears as he came.
He doesn’t say anything—he simply leans into my neck and pulls my T-shirt down my shoulder. I gasp as he latches onto my skin, sucking and licking like he usually only does after we’ve had sex.
In his room. Not out here. Out here is dangerous. Out here is bad.
Oliver is at the other end of the hallway.
He could walk out at any moment and find us like this, and I don’t think Mason would get away with his bug excuse this time.
Despite all that, I let it happen. My eyes flutter shut, and I feel my blood swell to two areas of my body: my neck, where his mouth is sucking hard and determined, and my cock, which is rising fast between my legs.
His teeth brush my skin, too soft to mark me but whispering a silent promise: soon.
I squeeze my lips shut to be quiet, but I can’t help the little moan that slips out when he pulls back and murmurs in my ear, “See you tonight, puppy.”
With that, he saunters to his room at the end of the hallway, and I’m left panting and painfully hard, hands against the wall, my groin throbbing along with the hickey he just sucked into my neck.
I nearly collapse to the floor but keep myself up from sheer will and grit. Once my erection has gone down, I go back to Oliver’s room.
“Is Mason back from the gym yet?” he asks.
“Uh, yeah.” He’s back, alright.
“Good. I need to ask him to stop leaving his dirty dishes in the sink. It’s fucking annoying.” When I sit down, he looks at me oddly. “Where are our drinks?”
“Oh.” Crap. I totally forgot. Mason distracted me and made me lose focus. “Um, I’ll go get them.”
I make my way through the hallway again in a daze, my mind cloudy with a heady mix of arousal and white-hot shame.
If Mason wanted to get me even more desperate for our nightly routine, he did the right thing, and going by the smirk on his lips as I enter his room, he seems to know it.
I should scold him for what he did, for the danger he put us in earlier today, but when I see him sitting naked on the side of the bed, the rational part of my brain short-circuits.
I sink straight to my knees, looking up at him between his legs.
He chuckles and ruffles my hair. “Someone’s eager for a treat.”
I am. Fuck, I am. I inhale a shuddering breath, already deep into the submissive state of mind only Mason can conjure.
He wraps his hand around the base of his shaft and brings the head of his cock to my lips. “Go ahead. Have a taste.”
I groan at the first salty pulse of his precum as I wrap my lips around the fat head. Soon enough, he grows hard in my mouth, swelling against my tongue.
“That’s a good boy,” he whispers. He brushes my bangs aside and makes me look up at him. “What do you want this time, puppy?”
His cock slips out of my mouth. “I want…” My face heats up, and I look away.
“It’s okay,” Mason says. “You can tell me. Or would you rather show me?”
I nod eagerly.
“Well, then. Come here.”
I stand up and take my clothes off before I crawl into his lap. “I want, um… like this.”
Mason grabs my hips, and I gasp as the head of his cock catches on my rim. “You want to ride me?”
“Yes.”
“Come here, then.” Mason takes me with him as he scoots further up the bed until he’s got his feet planted on the mattress, lying flat on his back. “Get yourself ready for me, puppy,” he says, and he gives me the bottle of lube.
My cheeks heat furiously. “I want…”
“Want me to do it?”
I nod.
Mason smirks. “Turn around, puppy. I want to see that pretty hole.”
I spin around in his lap until I have my backside turned to his face.
“Mm. Come closer.” He grips my hips, urging me to back up toward him.
I feel his breath hit my crease, and when his thumbs part my cheeks and he swipes his tongue over my hole, I give a surprised moan, too loud.
“Shh. We need something to keep that mouth quiet.” He grips his cock and nudges it against my face.
“Here. Suck on this. Now be a good puppy and don’t make a sound. ”
I wrap my lips gratefully around his cock as he licks into me.
He’s moaning too—we both are, enjoying each other like this.
I come close to losing my balance multiple times, but Mason holds my hips in place as he plunges his tongue into me, lapping over my hole, circling my rim, probing my hole with his finger, getting it to open just slightly before he dives back in with his tongue.
When he squirts lube onto his fingers and starts fingering me open, I have a hard time focusing on his cock, so I just keep it in my mouth while I hum and moan.
Once he’s pushed a sufficient amount of lube inside me, he pulls out his fingers. “Ready, puppy?”
I look to the side. Mason is holding a condom packet out to me, so I take it, rip it open, and roll the condom over his slick length. I expect him to order me to turn around, but instead he nudges my hips forward again, and suddenly, I understand what he wants.
I hover over his cock while he grabs his base and guides himself inside. I gasp as I sink down, feeling the slight burn that quickly turns to pleasure.
“Mm, just like that,” Mason says. “Fuck, you should see yourself, puppy.”
I whine as I start riding him, placing one hand on the wall for leverage and shifting back up, shuddering as I take him deeper.
“Such a good puppy,” he groans. “So good.”
I want to turn around to see his face, but I don’t want to interrupt him. I don’t want to lose this moment between us. I keep riding him, keep sliding up and down, rocking, thrusting, enjoying every moment to the fullest.
This is all we have—these stolen nights where no one knows what we’re doing, during the summer before the end of it all. Oliver will leave, and Mason… Mason won’t be part of my life anymore. His hands won’t be gripping my hips, his cock won’t be pushing through my insides, and his voice won’t be—
“Oh,” he moans. “Oh, fuck.”
His hands tighten on my hips, and there’s a thud as his head falls back on the mattress. He bucks into me hard, filling the condom with his release and taking me a bit by surprise. I didn’t know he was that close.
“Fuck,” he mumbles, stroking my hips, breathless. “That was so good. So fucking hot.” He reaches over and grabs my neglected cock. I sit back and whine as he strokes me hard and fast, and it doesn’t take much for me to explode in his hand.
He chuckles and brings his hand to his mouth. When I look back, he’s licking his palm, smirking. “How was that, puppy?”
“Good,” I gasp. His cock slips out of me, and I turn around to face him. “Really good.”
“You liked that?” He ruffles my hair, still smirking.
I lean into his hand. “Yeah. Did you?”
He licks his lips, and his touch turns softer, pushing my bangs out of my face. “Yeah. Yeah, I liked it, alright.”
I smile as a strange sort of triumph fills my chest.
He liked having sex with me, which… I mean, it shouldn’t be such a revelation, but still. He liked it. He really liked it.
“Do you like me?” I want to ask, but I don’t dare. The very thought sends a spike of anxiety through my chest where the triumph used to be, and my smile falls.
I shouldn’t even care if he likes me or not, but when I look down at him now, at the way he licks his lips, I want to taste them, and I want… I want so many things, things I never planned on wanting. My mouth falls open, but I close it quickly and look away.
All those desires bundle up in my chest and burst out in the form of an anxious wave of emotions, and it’s enough to make me crawl out of Mason’s lap, put on my clothes, and leave without saying good night.