Chapter 13
THIRTEEN
Fuck. Shit . Shit . Fuck .
In less than a week, my whole world had completely been turned upside down.
There was a reason I lived under a strict regimen. Daily exercise and training. Eating healthy. Frequent doctor checkups. Planned vacations. And it was all because I was running from a past I didn’t want to confront. I was happy where I was at, and so close to getting what I wanted most in life: retribution for my past, thereby securing hope for my future.
And now, someone had shoved me back into the world of my past, the asshole.
When I found out who’d ordered this, I was going to slit his neck from one end to another, like a gutted fish. I’d done it once before and wouldn’t hesitate to do it again. Someone was clearly out for my torture, but I wasn’t having any of that shit.
Not only was I going to have to deal with these fucking cravings again, I was also beholden to Knight—something unacceptable in my world.
He first took me to see a nurse, a girl named Olga, Phee for short, who took one look at me and proclaimed in a charming New Orleans accent, “Lord, not another one! Let me get the buprenorphine.”
After my withdrawal and delusional rantings had calmed down, he’d brought me back to his house—a place I’d never been. Not this one, at least. He'd stripped off my dress, showered and put me in a pair of sleeping shorts and a long t-shirt. Told me to get some sleep, and that we’d figure out what to do next, once I’d rested.
As soon as he was gone from the guest room, I’d jumped from the bed and was looking for a discreet way out of this place.
I couldn’t deal with being any more beholden to him than I already was, and being surrounded by his gorgeous and homey house was a temptation too big for even a strong woman like me. Everywhere I looked, it reminded me of a man I’d once fallen in love with, and those memories were best shoved back where they belonged: in the past.
He’d helped me tonight, been there for me when I really needed him but, despite my gratitude, I couldn't stick around and thank him. I would send him a stripper and basket of goodies as a thank you tomorrow.
My window faced a turquoise blue pool and a stunning view of the mountains beyond. His house was a three story mansion, built into a hill, and he had a row of cars on the side of the house. On the edges of my view, I could see them lined up, all nice and neat in a row. I’d bet my antique French vases that one of those cars had a set of keys inside.
Moving silently, I slipped out the window and onto the roof of the sunroom. As I made my way down the house and towards the driveway, a car began to snake its way up Knight’s driveway.
I stilled, lowering myself to the clay tiles, watching cautiously as my car suddenly appeared around the corner, followed by a black, familiar looking Hyundai SUV. Well fuck a duck , someone had found my Mercedes and brought it to me. Looks like I’d be sending two stripper baskets tomorrow.
When they stopped, Dante stepped out of my car, then waited as the Hyundai SUV parked next to it. Once the car door opened, out popped the head of Avery Wailani.
Fuck two ducks , what the hell was Avery doing with Dante?
Avery grew up in the middle of King territory and even hung out with Dante when they were kids, just like me and Knight, but they had a big falling out in high school and had avoided each other since. Her father was from Japan and her mom from Hawaii, and the result was stunning, with gorgeous tan skin, almond shaped, multicolored eyes, and gorgeous cascading black hair.
Even though she’d grown up around the made men of the King territory, her family was deeply religious, and as soon as she was old enough, she became a cop for the city.
I was shocked to see her here, as she tried to avoid being seen with anyone associated with the mafia these days.
Knight stepped out to meet them, inviting them in and I hesitated, trying to figure out what to do.
So far, I was feeling fine, however I knew that the buprenorphine would wear off soon. But, I had to know what they were doing here.
After all, it was literally what I did: collect secrets.
After climbing back inside, I snuck down the bamboo hardwood stairs, gritting my teeth as I passed the artwork on the walls. Then, unable to pass them by without looking, I went back, pulling in a shuttering breath as I studied them.
They were all women: one playing a cello, the painting smudged as if she was a part of the music. Another one was underwater, her hair splayed out, and air bubbles escaping her lips. One was naked with a view her back, but her face was turned towards the viewer, a coy smirk to her lips.
A knot formed in my throat, my eyes burning with unspent tears.
They were soulful and emotive; exactly the kind of paintings I would’ve chosen for my own home.
We were so alike, Knight and me. I’d only been here an hour but it already felt like home to me. From the smell of sage and coconut, to the cozy, unpretentious decor, and then there was that deep, intense connection I felt when we were together. From the first day we’d met, there was something there between us, the kind of connecting energy that no one understood except for him and me.
I’d felt it as a kid, even if I hadn’t understood it. But now that I had more experience in life, I knew it was something rare and special.
I took a minute to revel in this feeling—the utter ache and longing inside me for something more in my life besides ambition and revenge.
It was too bad I wanted to kill him. We could’ve been happy together.
After a long moment, I pulled myself together, pushing away the tormenting yearning inside me to face my reality. I had to work with what I had. I took shitty lemons from assholes and threw them back in their faces.
And besides, I’d already made this deal with Rook, and couldn’t go back on my word… could I ?
I was afraid I was beginning to forget why I hated Knight so much…
And then I remembered how it felt—to be alone, suffering from heroin withdrawal. And then, later on, to be totally paralyzed, having to pee myself, then sit in my mess for hours on end. The torture and endless pain.
In the end, it only made me stronger and I had to focus on that.
"Avery, you came."
Knight's voice, a deep rumble that made a shiver of need crawl through me. I hated that even just the sound of his voice could make me feel vulnerable.
“It wasn't really a choice," she responded, and I finished slinking down the stairs, then peeked into the kitchen from the shadows, catching her brief glare at Dante. “Tell me what you need. I’m not killing anyone or getting rid of evidence.”
“You should know we don’t need you for something like that.” Knight pulled out a baggie and laid it on the hand-carved farm table in between them.
"What's this?" Avery didn't touch it.
"That's what I want you to find out," Knight responded.
"It looks like a junkie needle. Tell me what's so special about it." Avery didn't look impressed.
“We found it. The doctor thinks it’s heroine."
“Where’d you find it?”
Knight didn’t immediately answer, only giving her a stark stare. Finally, when she didn’t make a move, he said, “It was found in the middle of the strip.”
“And?”
“This is important to us.” Knight's voice had grown even darker, a low growl, betraying his anger.
“And what the hell does that have to do with me?”
“It has to do with Tatiana.”
"Tatiana?" At this, Avery looked concerned.
Years ago, I’d helped Avery with a problem she’d had. One of my girls had alerted me to the fact that Avery’s boyfriend was physical with her, and I’d taken care of him—in ways she didn’t want to know about.
Avery looked intrigued, bending over it. "I didn't know she used."
"She doesn't."
At this, Avery looked up at him. "You think someone injected this into her?"
Knight didn't answer her, instead, pressed the baggie closer.
"And you expect me to find out where this came from?"
"It didn't come from us," Dante said, "and we can't accuse the cartel of it, or that would start a war. Bourbon has made it very clear that there's to be no violence in the streets right now."
Avery crooked an eyebrow upward. "Only just now?"
When the men didn't answer her, she sighed, touching the top of the bag lightly. "You know I don't get involved in mafia business. That's the deal we struck when I became a cop. I stay out of your business, and you stay out of mine." She was looking at Dante.
"I don't fucking care," Knight leaned over. “If you don't want more people dead because of this, then you will take it and find out where it came from."
"Are you threatening me?”
"He's not." Dante said.
"I fucking am," Knight said. "I don't care what it takes. This could only be the first step in whatever this person has planned for Tatiana. I won't let anything stop me from protecting her. So, like I said, unless you want more deaths on your hands, I would take care of this for me."
"I don't care what you have to do," Dante responded to Knight. “Do whatever it takes to keep Tatiana safe, but you will never threaten Avery again, do I make myself clear?"
I could only stare at them in shock. I'd never seen Dante or Knight fight, and I had no idea Dante even had feelings , never mind any for a woman.
Now that I knew why Avery was here, I needed to get the hell out of here, before Knight realized that I wasn’t resting.
I turned to go, heading for the front door when Avery's response made me still. "Calm down, you two. I'll do it." I heard the bag rustle, “But just know that I'm doing it for Tatiana , not for you."
For me?
Avery had been proud to join the police force, even though most of the people she knew worked for the mafia. I was sure, just like me when I was a kid, that being ‘good’ was a liability in her world.
But she’d faced all that pressure with courage, doing what she felt was right.
I hated that she was willing to cross the lines of her own morality for me.
I had my fingers on the door knob but turned my head to see the alarm system just in time. It would probably beep if I opened the door. I hesitated, trying to decide what to do, when I heard them saying their goodbyes.
Shit, shit.
I rushed towards the open window and was halfway through it when firm hands wrapped around my waist and pulled me back into the room. "Where do you think you're going, polva ?
I hated the way my body prickled with want as he pulled me against him. “I’m just checking the weather. Look - hot and dry today.”
“And it’ll be the same tomorrow and the day after.” Knight threw me over his shoulder and headed towards the stairs. “Why aren’t you resting?”
It'd been a long time since I'd blushed, and I certainly wasn't blushing now, but I was acutely aware of Dante and Avery now staring at me.
"You know how to let yourself out," he said to them, running up the stairs.
As soon as we were at the top, and I'd heard the door shut behind them, I slid down so that my legs were wrapped around his waist.
Knight kept his hold over me tight, and I stared into his creek-bed brown eyes, trying not to reveal the way my skin was buzzing from the contact.
How incredible it felt to be like this again, so close, with only our breath between us.
He stared into my eyes intently, and I couldn't look away. Couldn’t let him win the stare down between us.
"You haven't answered my question."
My mind raced, trying to remember what he'd asked, but it was difficult to remember with the way my heart was pounding in my chest.
He leaned forward, his lips kissing my forehead. “Why aren’t you sleeping, little polva?”
“Because, I—” I said, suddenly realizing that I’d already been thinking about how I could score more heroin. It was easy in this city. I inhaled sharply, hollowed out at the thought.
“You wanted more heroin,” he finished for me, as we walked back towards the guest room, passing more beautiful artwork.
“No.”
He gave me a sympathetic smile, which only pissed me off.
“I don’t need you to save me, Knight.”
“I know that.”
“Then put me down,” I began to struggle against him.
“That’s not happening, little polva.” We got to the guest room and I grabbed the doorway, stopping us.
“Stop calling me that.”
“If you only knew what it meant, you would crawl on hands and knees to beg me to call you that.”
I rolled my eyes. “I will never crawl on my hands and knees for you.”
“That’s a promise I’ll make you break,” he said, his gaze heated. He tenderly unhooked my fingers and I let him. Staring into his eyes, he threw me onto the soft bed, then crawled over me.
My body tingled with pleasure from his body over mine, the soft mattress under me. I was pressed up against the leather headboard, the large image of another underwater woman, her eyes a stark blue, looking down at me.
I suddenly realized something about all the paintings of women in Knight’s home. They all had black hair and blue eyes.
That couldn’t…
That couldn’t be a coincidence. Could it?
Silence permeated the air and, once again, my gaze was drawn to his lips. Lips that I’d been obsessed with as a kid, lips that were soft and sweet and demanding all at once. Lips that I wanted to nibble and taste.
“Not thinking about running, are you Tati?” His hands went to my wrists, moving them up over my head.
“Yes,” I admitted the truth. I was beginning to have feelings, to open myself up to him again. I needed to run as far and as fast from him as possible. I put my hand on his hips, cinching my fingers into them tight. “Are you going to let me go?”
“That depends.”
I suddenly realized that he was pulling my wrists into soft, leather bracelets. The bastard was tying me up.
I wrapped my legs around his waist, yanking him to me, and his cock hardened against my stomach. “On what?”
“On whether you’re going to take suboxone or methadone.”
He was talking about the drugs that would transition my withdrawal over time.
“No.” I lifted my chin stubbornly. “I’m not taking months to get off this drug. I’m stronger than that.”
“That’s what I thought.” He released my wrists, already bound, and wrapped a hand into the back of my hair, fisting it. He tugged until I was looking upwards, exposing my neck to him. His teeth scraped the delicate skin there, and a sudden flush of warmth spread from my cunt, outward. I hitched a breath as his lips moved downward. His fingers still clasping my hair tight, pulling it taught. God it was so hot. “My answer is no. I’m not letting you go.”
I whimpered with need, when there was a sudden noise at the doorway, a clearing of a throat. It was Phee, the nurse, looking at us like she was ready to go into war. “I’m ready, sir.”
“How many times do I need to tell you, Tatiana? You cannot escape me.” Knight bit my ear, whispering, “You’re not doing this without me. We’ll go to hell and back, together.”