26. Harper
Chapter 26
Harper
At some point, I fall asleep, and I don’t stir until the light of dawn starts knocking on my eyelids. Outside, the sky’s brightening, and the miniature display of the airplane’s path indicates that there’s only an hour left of our flight.
Oh my god. One hour and I’m back in New York.
Only the thought of my sister can stop me from spinning into a panic spiral.
I spoke to Riley at the airport. Cian called Finn to request they pick us up, and he handed me the phone so Riley and I could chat a second before hanging up. The hope and relief in my sister’s voice triggered the same emotions in me.
If Riley really is happy to see me, maybe that means she can forgive me for all the bad blood I’ve injected into our relationship over the years.
Thinking of Riley got me through so many tough moments in the past two months, and I could not be more excited to see her. Focusing on that keeps me sane…that, and the sight of Cian’s sleeping face.
Damn it, I hate him for throwing away my cellphone.
If I still had it, I could snap a picture of this, and once Cian and I go our separate ways, forever, at least I’d have this small souvenir. I’ll have to memorize this moment instead.
In Hawaii, I learned to really appreciate a beautiful view.
Somehow, the plane lands too soon and not soon enough. We’re the first ones down the jetway, and Cian holds my hand the entire time. I try to move as slowly as possible.
I don’t want this to end.
I want to tell him that whatever’s happening between us doesn’t need to stop just because our time together is over, but that’s stupid, so I keep my mouth shut as we shuffle forward in sleepy silence. The path snakes left, then right, and as we approach the end, light from the terminal hits us. It’s eight in the morning, Eastern Time.
Like horror-movie déjà vu, I feel an apocalypse brewing . I’m living in that moment when the first victim realizes she’s in the wrong place at the wrong time, right before something horrible happens.
But then I see Riley and Finn waiting for us at the gate. They must’ve bought tickets to meet us past security.
I suppose that’s another benefit of mafia money.
I stop walking. They haven’t seen us yet.
“Har—” Cian’s about to ask me what’s wrong when I fold my arm around his and yank him left. We’re out of the flow of jetway traffic in an alcove, invisible to the boarding area.
This may be our final moment alone, and I refuse to give it up without saying anything .
“What is it?” Cian traces my cheekbone with his thumb. “What’s wrong?”
I love his sleepy face more than I love flowers. In fact, would trade every blossom on Earth to possess all his sleepy expressions, even if it kills all the bees and butterflies and ruins the ecosystem for good.
I trace his face with my eyes, then my hands, then my lips. Throwing my arms around his neck, up on my toes, I kiss Cian with everything I’ve got. I love that I don’t have to explain it to him. He knows exactly what I’m saying. I know by the way his arm encircles my waist and the fingers of his other hand knot themselves in my hair.
Cian’s lips love me.
I don’t know about the rest of him, but for now, his lips will do.
No one’s ever kissed me this way.
What took you so long to get to me? I want to shout at him. Couldn’t you have come sooner?
All those years of dying a slow death under my father’s thumb. If I’d had Cian then, I could have survived it all. I’m sure of it.
If I’d had Cian, I never would’ve considered leaving New York City.
My back thuds against a wall as Cian presses us against it. Our panting between kisses goes unheard beneath the chorus of footfalls and rolling luggage of chattering tourists and vacationers stretching and yawning from that red-eye flight.
Cian grabs my ass, and I bite his lip. One of his hands flies up the back of my shirt, and the electricity zaps through us when our skin touches. We open our eyes and stare each other down. Because we need to stop.
This is no longer the time or place.
We both understand that when we round that corner, I’ll run to my sister, and he’ll walk to Finn. No one can learn what happened on that tiny island in the Pacific.
I gulp around my thick, dry throat.
Dear lord, I’m in so much trouble.
Cian tucks his forehead to mine, our noses brushing. “What was that?”
Cheeks flaming, I roll my lips together. “Just in case.”
“Just in case what?”
“I don’t get a chance to later…”
My words darken the mood, and Cian pulls away like my touch stings.
Or maybe I’m imagining that it hurts him the way it hurts me.
“Let’s go.” Cian puts his facade on, and that man who captivated me disappears.
I nod to hide the fact that I’m fighting back tears. He doesn’t reach for my hand again, and I don’t reach for his, and it’s awful because I need his strength more than I’ve ever needed anything.
Ten steps later, we reach the gate waiting area. Tears stream down my face at this point, and I’m so glad not to be the only one. Riley’s never looked more like my twin than she does now, bawling as badly as I am.
I fling myself at her and glory in her nostalgic, comforting lavender scent. She smells like our mother during the good days, when we were little, and Mom could spend all her time with us and away from Thomas Brennan. Like a me-sized glove around my whole body, she squeezes me hard.
Riley and I hold hands like children as we take the lead. Cian and Finn hang back, which is good because the pair of them together are terrifying . Over six-foot-tall, hulking monsters prowling through the airport, glaring at whoever’s unlucky enough to catch their eye.
If it were just Cian, he’d seem more like an intimidating, bulked up runway model having a bad day. But him looking glum next to Finn multiplies the fear factor by quite a bit.
I think I’m shaking. Am I smiling? I hope I’m smiling. Travelers abound in every direction. Claustrophobia intrudes my senses. The airport in Honolulu was more open, spread out, and peaceful. Harmonious with nature.
JFK is like a sixteen-lane highway at rush hour.
Smells, sounds, fluorescent lights, crowds. I don’t have my feet on the ground until Riley pulls me down into a booth at a diner in whatever terminal this is. The guys lurk nearby. I can sense their joint testosterone output the way heat from a bonfire hits from several paces off.
“There’s so much to say,” Riley begins with a laugh. “I don’t know where to start.” Her laughter summons mine like a spell.
I swipe at my damp cheeks. “I know exactly what you mean.”
Apologies. Hawaii. Cian. Riley. Finn. Cian.
“Why don’t we start with grilled cheese sandwiches?” My stomach approves of my sister’s suggestion. And now I realize I need to pee . An eight-hour flight and who knows how much wine? I didn’t get up one time.
“Yes, yes, yes.” I rise from the table. “Give me one second!”
Thankfully, there’s a bathroom right across from the diner that I make a beeline for.
After I wash my hands, I check out the horror-show that is my face and splash some water over my cheeks. God, I really look like hell.
But I feel light. Lighter than I have in a while, and I don’t understand why.
As I grab for a paper towel, footsteps echo behind me. I glance into the mirror just in time to see a woman with wide sunglasses raise an object resembling a nightstick above my head.
Her hand falls, and a sharp pain spears the back of my skull.
Then, everything goes black.