37. Harper
Chapter 37
Harper
It’s one o’clock on a Sunday afternoon, and for some reason, Finn and Rory are drunk. Riley and I only ventured down to the lounge because…well, because I was hoping to run into Cian.
The way we left things outside Shane’s office was wrong. I don’t know what was supposed to happen, but that wasn’t it.
Only, Cian’s not here.
When we walk in, Finn and Rory are playing pool, except they’re acting ridiculous because they’re shit-faced. I’m ready to spin on my heel and waltz back out again, but Riley doesn’t budge. She covers her mouth with her hand because she’s smiling like an idiot, all goo-goo-eyed over Finn.
Drunk Finn must be cute to her or something.
Gross.
I start to tug Riley’s sleeve, but then Finn glances up and sees us standing there.
When his eyes lock on Riley, the heir to the Irish Kings turns all melty, like a cone of soft-serve ice cream. Thirty percent of me is horrified by how sappy, gushy, and absolutely insane this is. Seventy percent of me is helplessly mesmerized by the sight.
Finn is a terrifying guy but seeing him soften like that for my sister yanks on my heartstrings. He really does love her.
And I know exactly what he’s experiencing on the inside because I…
I’m in love with Cian Mahoney.
It’s like a gong clangs though my entire body. Like a foundation in my heart caves in, and butterflies burst out.
I love Cian. So much. It’s irrational and strange and unbelievable, but I’ve never been so sure of anything before in my life. He’s the only one I love and the only one I want. I don’t care where I am as long as he’ll be there.
And I need to tell him that. Right now. Five minutes ago. Yesterday. The night he rescued me. What the hell took me so long to realize it?
When I snap back into the moment, Finn’s got one hand on my sister’s ass and the other in her hair and man , I need to find Cian quick so I can get some of that for myself. The floodgates of my desire open all at once. I want him, need him, crave him so much, I’m ill.
“Where’s Cian?” My voice is one notch beneath a shout.
“Airport,” Rory replies.
An airport? As in… leaving the state of New York without so much as a goodbye? As in, disappearing on his next assignment before I get the chance to tell him he’s the love of my life?
The ground sways. “Which airport?”
“JFK.” Finn appears eager to claim his kisses, but Riley’s focused on me. When our eyes meet, our twin powers kick in.
“I’ll drive you.” She finishes kissing Finn and strides my way.
“What are you going to do?” Finn calls after us.
“Top secret!” Riley grabs my hand, and we power walk—as quickly as I can, anyway—to the garage, where she produces a set of keys. One of the sports cars chirps, we climb in, and my sister and I are off the estate in minutes. After learning to drive in the boondocks with me, she’s gotten really comfortable driving in Manhattan.
She rolls the windows down as we ride, the heat oppressing us. Riley’s always loved summer air, no matter how humid and stuffy it gets. She sucks it in happily, racing through green-lit intersections like we’re in a video game and she plans to win.
“So?” She almost yells over the wind and noisy city air. “What are you going to do?”
Signs for the airport pass us by.
I take a deep breath. “Say something.”
Finn texts us the flight information, so by the time we arrive, I can tell Riley which terminal we need to go to.
“Pull over up there. I’ll go inside and?—”
I point toward an open patch of curb, but my sister interrupts me.
“No way. I’m not losing you in an airport again.” She navigates into the parking deck across from the terminal. “Let’s wait for him out here.”
“What if he’s not coming out, Ry? He could be going off on an assignment for all we know!” My heart trips a little as I crane my head in every direction, searching for any sign of the man I love.
“Calm down.” Riley uses her ‘mom’ voice. “Finn said Cian only went after them to talk. He’s not getting on any planes.”
“But what if you’re wrong?” The hysteria in my voice surprises even me. “And we don’t know where he parked. Or what kind of car he drives.”
“That’s not actually true.” Riley turns a corner in the lot, and a man appears down the aisle. Keys in hand, head down.
It’s him .
“Riley!”
She slams on the brakes. “What?”
I can only point.
My sister tracks my gaze and sees the enforcer we’re looking for striding away from us.
Cian Mahoney.
I already knew I loved him but watching him doing something as mundane as walking to his car fills me up from the bottom of my feet to the top of my head with a deep, newfound affection.
I throw open the door as Riley lays on the horn.
Cian jumps, head whipping in our direction. As soon as he spots me, that cold, pretty-boy persona he wears melts right off. The same way Finn’s gruff, deadly demeanor softens to mush when he sees my sister.
I start making my way toward him. I’m irritatingly slow, so he meets me halfway and blinks at me, his jaw dangling open. “Harper? What are you doing here?”
“I need to talk to you.” My fingers land on his forearm, and that giant hand of his floats up to cup my elbow.
“What is it? What’s going on?”
“Where’d you park?”
Cian presses a button on his key, and a deep blue Audi a few spaces up beeps.
As she passes us, Riley gives me an encouraging smile before maneuvering toward the parking deck’s exit, leaving us alone.
I’ll have to go the rest of the way on my own.
My heart jackhammers against my ribs, the reverberation bouncing down my legs and rattling my knees.
Once we’re in the car, Cian turns the engine over and hits the AC.
“Um…” I brush my shorter hair behind my ears once, twice, three times because I can’t comprehend how I ever spoke to Cian to begin with. He’s so dazzling. How did I not fall for him the moment I laid eyes on him?
“Harper, what are you doing here?” The sensitivity in his voice weakens me, but I’m fighting to tap into the courage that brought me all the way here. “What’s wrong?”
“What’s wrong is I can’t handle it. I never cared before, but now that I do, it’s unimaginable.”
“Slow down.” He moves one hand to my shoulder and squeezes. “What’s unimaginable?”
“The thought of not seeing you anymore.”
His eyes widen, and his beautiful lips part. He’s gaping at me.
Great. This is off to a terrific start.
“What I mean is…” I backpedal as hard as I can. “Thank you for coming all the way to Hawaii to bring me home. Spending time with you there changed my life. And I want more time with you. I don’t even know if you want that, but I…”
My eyes well up. Perfect. Just perfect.
I’m becoming a one-woman crying machine.
Cian’s still staring at me like I’m nuts.
“I just didn’t know that you cared about me. No one ever has before, not like that, and if I’d known that, I… Look, I’m sorry for the way I acted that night at the bar. I’m sorry I didn’t call you.”
Cian grips the back of my neck and pulls me across the console for a kiss. It’s so fast that I nearly get whiplash, and for a moment I worry my stitches might pop again. But then his lips devour me to the point of deoxygenation, and any thought of discomfort or pain flees my mind.
Ironically, him kissing me this way is like I’m breathing again for the first time in days. I don’t know how I’ll ever stop.
He pulls away, leaving us both panting.
“I didn’t know you cared either.” Cian presses another savage kiss to my mouth, his hand sliding down to the back of my neck.
When he releases me this time, I know it’s now or never.
“I’m in love with you, Cian Mahoney.”
“Say that again,” Cian growls against my lips.
I’m probably going to regret this, but I carefully crawl across the car to straddle his lap. He already has one of his massive hands under my dress, yanking my panties aside. His fingers slide into me like they’re dipping into a honey jar.
I moan against his open mouth as our tongues tangle together.
I drown in his kisses, hips twitching as his fingers explore my hot, moistening body.
How did I get here? Who cares?
This man is all I need.
“I love you. So much that I don’t know how I ever existed without you.” My words come out in a muffled rush, but Cian growls at me anyway as he unzips his pants. He works until his velvety skin rubs up against me. “ Ah .”
“I love you, too, Harper Brennan.”
My eyes snap open, our gazes locking. My heart actually stops beating.
“Really?” I whisper.
Cian nods, carefully lifting me by the hips before easing me onto his erect dick. The way he feels inside me is so amazing, my head drops back like I’m stargazing.
“I love you,” he repeats, holding me still as he kisses along my jaw. “You’re a spoiled brat, a pain in my ass, and you’re in my thoughts every minute of the fucking day. You drive me crazy, and I don’t ever want to be sane again.” As he bites down on my neck, I gasp, all the breath lost from my lungs. “I sure as hell know I never want to live without you either.”
I squirm my hips, whimpering. “Cian?—”
“No one’s ever going to hurt you,” he growls against my skin, his fingers digging into my hips. “I won’t let anyone between us ever again. If they try, I’ll rip them to fucking pieces.”
“Cian, please,” I gasp out, so full, I need more ?—
“I’ve got you, baby.” Cian works me up and down his shaft as if God intended for sex to take place in cars. And even though my side aches, I revel in the experience because this is everything to me.
He’s everything to me.
“Oh.” Pleasure builds as I ride him. “Oh, god, Cian, yes .”
We steam up the tinted windows while trading more I love you’s.
Something tells me we’re going to be saying that to each other for a long, long time.