Chapter 36
Harrison left to have a drink with a friend and talk about whatever it was that ridiculously rich people talked about, probably plans for world domination or something else equally as asinine.
I’d admit I did make myself giggle when he dressed in a three-piece suit. Was this friend the president or a king? What would happen if he dressed in jeans and a sweater like a normal human meeting a friend? Would the Brooks brothers roll over in their graves? Would he be instantly disinherited?
I had to wonder what casual-Harrison looked like. Not DA Astrid, or Mr. Astrid, just Harrison.
Did that person exist outside of the time he spent in bed with me?
Did other people get to see that lighter, sweet side of him? Or was the warrior always out for blood and justice the only thing other people knew?
With a smile on my face and the tension that I thought had a permanent place in my back now gone, I took the opportunity to learn a little more about Mr. Harrison Astrid by snooping around his apartment.
Under normal circumstances, I would have considered it an invasion of privacy—I would have still done it, but I would have admitted it was wrong. But he had asked me to move in with him. I thought I had a good grasp on who he was as a man, but I hadn’t known him that long, and I had to be sure.
I started rummaging through his closet of never-ending suits while I let my mind wander.
There were some hard decisions that I had to make. Did I want to live with Harrison? I did, but was I ready for the things that would go along with living with Harrison? He had said no one in the office needed to know, but realistically speaking, they would find out. They always found out. Lawyers, secretaries, and paralegals were nothing but gossips, always looking for the next scandal. Minding other people’s business was what made them good at their jobs.
If it came out that I was living with and sleeping with my boss, it would definitely hurt my reputation, but we weren’t breaking any laws. It was an ethical gray area that I could easily argue was perfectly legal. I was a consenting adult, and Harrison was not holding my job over my head. There was no misconduct happening within the office that anyone ever needed to know about. I could go to Mrs. Lakeson and ask to be assigned to someone else’s desk after explaining the new personal relationship, but we had already put her through so much, and no one else’s work met Harrison’s expectations.
I didn’t know if I was going to be comfortable making this a long-term decision, but in the interim, I would admit it was better to live here in the lap of luxury where it was safe than in the only-sometimes-heated single room that I had been in. The idea of going back there to spend another winter almost freezing to death every single night was just unbearable. Although I would never be able to enjoy the change in my living situation knowing Sabrina was still there.
Tonight I would talk to Harrison about the status of his charges against my landlord or at the very least the possibility of finding new housing for Sabrina. Maybe he would let her stay in the apartment he first gave to me. I could just imagine her face when she saw the city views and luxurious accommodations.
I didn’t find any autopsy tools, severed heads, or women’s shoes in his closet. So there was no reason for me to tell him no.
There was, however, a limit to the generosity and charity that I was willing to accept from, well, anyone, but especially the man that I was sleeping with.
So I needed to run back to my apartment and grab some clothes, a few personal mementos, and let my best friend know where I was so she didn’t try to send out a search party. If she filed a missing person’s report and then I was found in the district attorney’s home, that would definitely get out, quickly.
I got dressed and then wrote Harrison a note letting him know where I was and that I would be back, just on the off chance he got back before I did. I didn’t plan on staying long, though, it was really just a quick in-and-out trip.
I headed downstairs and waved to the doorman on my way out, then put my earbuds into my ears and turned on some music. It had been so long since I just listened to something that made me happy.
Honestly, after last night and this morning, I felt lighter.
Despite the work and workout I had earlier, I felt energized and shamelessly rocked out to some Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera, and a little Pink. I was on cloud nine. This had to be what happiness felt like. I had never let myself truly feel this way before. I was always waiting for the other shoe to drop, but this time, I wanted to feel it. I wanted to bask in this feeling for as long as I could.
It was almost like I was a new person; there was a little dance in my step, and I smiled at people as I walked past them on the sidewalk. Of course, this being New York, they all stared at me like I was on drugs, or a danger to society, or worse, from California.
Since Harrison had taken his car and driver, and it was the middle of the day with the sun still up and people about, I figured it was safe enough to take the subway.
While in the subway, I got this nagging feeling at the back of my neck, the same one I got every time I was being watched. But I was in a good mood, so I decided that it was just all in my head, or people were staring because I was a New Yorker smiling on the subway. That shit was weird. A homeless man naked on a subway was totally normal. A woman smiling and genuinely happy in the New York winter was a sign of the apocalypse. Homeless, you could understand. Crazy was unpredictable.
I ignored the feeling and went about my business, getting off at my stop. Despite the shady neighborhood and the frigid weather, it was still a beautiful day, and I decided I was going to enjoy my walk to my soon-to-be former apartment building.
I still had that same nagging feeling tickling the back of my neck, but I ignored it, thinking it was all in my head. I did at least have the sense to turn off my music and pay a little bit more attention to my surroundings. For the first time I could remember, the guys were not sitting on the stoop, and I wondered if Harrison had made good on his threats to have the building and the landlord investigated.
It didn’t matter. I just needed to grab some things, and I’d be out. I ran up the stairs, made it to my door, and closed it behind me. My stuff seemed like it was all still here, like no one had ransacked the place, although I wasn’t quite sure how to tell. It wasn’t like I had dressers or anything to store things.
I grabbed a trash bag from under the kitchen sink and started throwing in clothes and anything else I wanted to keep.
It took me less than five minutes to get everything I needed. I looked around, seeing if there was anything else, and I realized that there was nothing in this apartment that I even wanted. This was all part of the old Eddie, the one who managed to convince herself that this was what it took to succeed in life. You had to sacrifice until you were miserable, letting people take advantage because of your rental situation. Never again. I was actually thinking about that as I got ready to leave, wondering if maybe that was the area of law I wanted to specialize in. I didn’t think it’d make me rich, especially because I had no intention of being on the landlord side of things, but maybe working for Legal Aid or some other legal clinic would make enough to support some kind of life, or who knows, maybe I would end up as Mrs. Harrison Astrid. The notion made me laugh, but something inside of me wanted it to be possible.
“Well, I think that’s it,” I said to absolutely no one.
I took one last look at the life of the old “Edwina Carmichael” then grabbed the trash bag, slinging it over my shoulder, ready to turn the page to the next chapter of my life. The one where I still worked like a dog but treated myself a little better and let other people, really one person, help me achieve my goals.
“Yeah, I don’t even think you’re going to be needing that, doll,” a deep, heavily accented voice said behind me.
I turned around to see two large men wearing dirty jeans and matching faded black hoodies and knit beanies standing in my doorway.
“Can I help you?” I said, taking a step back.
“We sure hope so, doll,” the big one on the left with greasy red curls sticking out from the beanie said. “You see, we were sent to pick up a package.”
“A package,” I repeated, taking another step back, trying to use my peripheral vision to see if I had anything that could be used as a weapon.
There was an old aluminum bat lying against the bathroom wall. I remembered Sabrina brought it over for something. I thought there was a mouse or a cockroach big enough to be a mouse or something that we’d had to battle.
I moved a little to the left, trying to get a little closer to it.
“Yeah, someone sent us to pick up a secretary, a little girl who’s been unable to mind her own business and keep her hands off other people’s property. Does that sound familiar to you?” The big red-headed guy said again, taking a large step toward me.
“Sorry to say, but no, it doesn’t. I’m not a secretary. I’m a paralegal. And I don’t really know my neighbors. I prefer to keep my nose out of other people’s business. You understand.”
I offered a shy smile, hoping it came off as friendly and they would think they had the wrong person. I tightened my core, trying to stop the shaking that was starting to run through my limbs.
“What’s the difference between a paralegal and a secretary?” the smaller man on the right with inky black hair and dark, menacing eyebrows asked.
“Secretaries make more money and do less work,” I said, barely keeping the shaking from my voice.
“Yeah, that sounds about right,” he snorted.
“Sure wish I could help you, fellas,” I said as I shrugged, moving just a little closer to the bat. It was almost within reach. Just another half step or two, and I would be able to grab it. This apartment had never felt so big.
“Yeah, see, here’s the thing: I don’t think it matters what your job title is because we were given a picture of the package that we were supposed to pick up.”
The big guy pulled his cell phone from his back pocket and turned the screen, showing a picture from the jail cell last night. It was of me, and my arms and legs were wrapped around Harrison. My face was twisted in bliss with my eyes closed, but it was clear enough and easy to tell who the girl in the photo was.
“And you see, I’m pretty sure you’re the blonde package that we’re supposed to be delivering to our boss.”
“I’m afraid you guys have made a mistake,” I said, taking another step toward the bat. “There has to be some kind of mistake.”
“See, I don’t think there is a mistake.” The big guy took another step toward me. I threw my bag at him, grabbed the aluminum bat, and swung with all my might, hitting him in the ribs.
He doubled over, and I lifted the bat again, high above my head, and swung it down like an axe, hitting him in the back. He made a pained yelping sound before he landed on the floor with a solid thunk.
The little guy came at me next.
“That was almost impressive,” he said with a laugh. “Too bad that’s the last brave thing you’re ever going to do, kitten.”
“Oh, I don’t know about that,” I said. “I’m not the rich bitches you’re used to kidnapping.”
I took another swing with all my might but the man dodged back, much quicker than his larger counterpart, and then grabbed the bat and yanked it from my hands hard enough that I had to catch myself before I landed on the floor.
“See now, that was just rude,” he said before kicking out and hitting me behind the knee, making me fall to the floor on my knees.
The next kick pushed me flat on my stomach, and he pressed his boot in the middle of my back.
“Now, here’s what’s going to happen. You’re going to be a good girl for us. We are going to stand up, all of us. We’re going to walk downstairs calmly, and you’re going to get in the car that’s waiting for us. You’re not going to say a word. You’re not going to say a thing to anybody cuz, let’s be honest, even if you did, what the fuck is anybody in this neighborhood going to do for someone they don’t know.”
“Please don’t,” I said. “I can get you whatever you want, like, I have money.”
I tried not to cry, but tears were burning behind my eyes, and my hands were shaking. Even my knees felt like they were going to collapse under me at any moment.
The big guy got back on his knees and then finally stood up, still breathing heavily, rubbing the spot on his back where I’d managed to hit him with the bat. A small point of pride grew in my gut. At least I’d fought back.
“No, Seamus. Why don’t you lock the door and give me and the girl here a moment alone so I can get some payback and maybe teach her some fucking manners?”
“We don’t have time for that,” the little guy, Seamus, said.
“Girl, you’re screwing a rich-ass motherfucker, a man with a silver spoon so far up his ass he can taste it, and he’s allowing you to live in a shithole like this? Shit. Fuck, bitch, we might be doing you a favor.”
“You might have a point,” Seamus said. “If she stayed here, she wasn’t going to survive the winter anyway. Still, we don’t have time for any fooling around now. I’m sure you’ll get your chance later. Come on, we’re running out of time. Pick her up, and let’s go.”
Seamus and the Big One each grabbed an arm and dragged me to my feet. I tried to fight them, but my back was screaming with every single movement. My head was swimming, and I just wanted to throw up, then curl up into a ball and sleep.
I tried pulling my arms out of their meaty grip, and it was absolutely useless. There was nothing I could do to get out of this.
Thinking as quickly as I could, I started loosening my shoe, nudging it with my other toe. When we got to Sabrina’s door, I used it, kicking it off my foot, trying to hit her door, praying she was home and saw what was happening.
I thought I heard a door open, but I wasn’t sure. I was fading in and out of consciousness as I was dragged downstairs and then thrown in the back of a car that reeked of whiskey and cigarettes.
The men argued outside the car for a minute. I thought it was about who was driving, but I couldn’t be sure. I was still dizzy, and it seemed like the world was spinning around me. Still, I tried to use the distraction and slide out of the other side of the car. I got about two steps away from it, opening my mouth to scream out for help when a big, meaty hand pressed over my lips and pulled me into a body. The putrid scent of sweat, body odor, and stale cigarettes was nearly enough to choke me. It made my eyes water, and I wanted to vomit.
“What did I say about you being a good girl?”
He pushed me against the car, hitting my head on the doorframe, and everything went dark.