22. Chapter 22
Chapter 22
Tate
I wake with a start. It’s dark and it takes me a moment to realize I’m in my bed. I was in such a dead sleep that I don’t even remember my head hitting the pillow. A brief panic hits me when I remember why it’s been so long since I’ve seen my bed. Just as quickly as it hits me, the panic begins to fade. He’s okay. He’s awake and still just as pissed at me now as he was after the announcement.
I prop the pillows behind me and lean against the headboard, scrubbing a hand over my face as the fog of sleep slowly begins to clear. When my eyes adjust to the dark, I see a figure curled up beside me. Joy. One leg hangs out while the rest of her is wrapped up in the throw blanket I usually keep at the end of the bed. One bare leg hangs out. She isn’t wearing pants. It doesn’t matter that I can’t see in the dark, that doesn’t stop me from instantly recalling what those legs felt like wrapped around me.
Squinting at the clock on my bedside table, I find I haven’t actually slept all day and night even though it feels like it. It’s 9:00 at night. Growling in my stomach reminds me I haven’t eaten anything since the breakfast sandwich and coffee Joy picked up from the café across from the hospital. I still can’t believe she drove back and forth, forgoing sleep, just to be there for me and to make sure River and I ate. Definitely above and beyond considering we’ve been in limbo since just before Gray got hurt.
Trying my best not to wake Joy, I carefully slide out of bed to make my way to the bathroom. She doesn’t stir, so I leave the door cracked and do what I have to do using nothing but the glow from the nightlight. She must be exhausted. I half expected to wake up to an empty house.
My stomach growls again, letting me know that I need to eat if I plan to go back to sleep. With my eyes adjusted to the dark, I see Joy has stretched out a bit more, revealing more of her naked thigh and the book she must have been curled up with. I’m not sure when she went to sleep, so I decide not to wake her before I head to the kitchen in search of food.
There are no leftovers since I haven’t been home to cook. Needing more than a quick snack, I scan the fridge for something fast and easy to make. My eyes land on a package of cheese. Grilled cheese sandwiches. Perfect. I grab the butter and sliced cheese, set them on the counter beside the bread, and get started.
“Hey.”
My back stiffens at the sound of Joy’s voice behind me. I finish flipping the sandwiches over before I turn around. And it’s a good thing, because goddamn. My eyes trail over her still half-naked figure, and it’s several long seconds before I remember how to speak. Instead of one of my T-shirts, she’s wearing a thin white camisole with the outline of her nipples visible in the dim light of the kitchen, and a pair of simple pink panties. Holy fuck.
“Did I wake you?” I finally ask as I turn around to press down on the sandwiches with a spatula.
As I wait for her response, I silently beg my dick to behave. I’m a thirty-eight-year-old man, I should be able to control myself. I turn back around to face her once I remove the grilled cheese sandwiches from the stove and place them onto a plate. Her eyes travel the length of me and I’m painfully aware that we are both standing in the kitchen half dressed. I’m not even half dressed, standing here in just my boxer briefs.
“No,” she breathes. “You didn’t wake me. I guess I’m just awake for the same reason you are.”
“Hungry?”
Her gaze drops down for a split second before returning to my eyes. Smirking, I grab a second plate, placing two of the four sandwiches onto it before passing it to her. Disappointment briefly crosses her gaze but vanishes as she looks down at her plate.
“I don’t want to take your food,” she objects.
“Sweetheart, I am not going to eat four grilled cheese sandwiches.”
Leading the way, I walk to the small kitchen table and pull out a chair for Joy before taking the opposite seat. She has a confused look on her face as she picks up a sandwich and takes a bite. Then, she closes her eyes and moans. She fucking moans, and I have to shift in my seat to adjust my hardening cock.
“This is delicious. You cooked for me even though I was sleeping?”
I meet her eyes, and once again I forget my words. She’s always beautiful, but sitting across from me, her hair a mass of thick, unruly curls, no makeup, and no walls up, I can’t look away. I’ve never had anything like this before—someone who shares my space and immediately makes it better just by being here. I clear my throat to try and get rid of the tightness in my chest.
“Of course, I made enough for you.”
“Thank you.” She gives me a small smile before starting on her second sandwich.
Grilled cheese is one of my specialties, so it doesn’t take long before I’m paying attention to my food and not the look of surprise on her face just because I made her something to eat. When I glance back up, she lets out a small chuckle and presses her teeth into her bottom lip.
I raise an eyebrow and swallow the last of my sandwich. “What is it?”
“I was just thinking about the first time I was here.”
Memories of that night instantly flood my mind. I remember every second I’ve spent with her, so it doesn’t take much for the vivid images to begin replaying. The way she looked wearing my clothes. The kiss in the rain. Our shared midnight snack. Lounging under the blanket, watching that insane documentary. The expression on her face when she came apart around my fingers. The way she melted at my words of praise.
When I return my attention to her face, her eyes are on me. “And the last time I was here.”
I lose the battle over my now fully erect dick. It took an inordinate amount of strength to get out of bed with her lying there. But I haven’t forgotten her words to me just before Gray’s accident. She ended things. Said she can’t do it. She asked for space.
“Joy, we should talk.”
“It’s late. It’s been a long few days. I don’t want to talk.”
My brain screams at me to shut this down. I do my best to avoid messy situations, and I already know she’s it for me. If we do this and then she decides she doesn’t want anything more with me, I’m not sure I’ll recover from it. But after these last few days, there’s nothing I’d rather do than lose myself in her.
“Please.”
The raspy word from her lips is enough to lure me to my own destruction. I don’t give a fuck what happens to me after this. The first night she was here, I turned her down. I wanted her even more than I wanted my next breath, but I sent her away because I thought she deserved someone who could give her more. The look on her face still haunts me. Combine that with how fucking bad I need to feel her body beneath mine and there’s no way I’m going to tell her no.
“Sweetheart, is this what you really want? I won’t be the one to stop this; I’m not that good of a man.”
She stands and rests her hand on the back of the chair. “All I care about is right now. And after the past few days, we need this.”
Goddammit. I told her I wouldn’t be the one to stop this, but I can’t help my hesitation. She didn’t answer my question. Didn’t say she was sure this was what she wanted. But she’s right. I need to lose myself in her, even if it’s just a short break from reality. If she decides she doesn’t want to be together just because I own the ranch, I’ll figure that out.
She doesn’t move from where she stands beside her chair. Her peaked nipples strain against the thin fabric of her top and her breathing quickens under my gaze. Without any further hesitation, I stand and am in her space after just a couple long strides.
“I should put a stop to this,” I say before covering her lips with mine.
As soon as our mouths connect, heat courses through me and I pull her close, so our bodies are flush. Her soft frame melts into mine as I slide my tongue into her mouth. There’s no turning back. I’ve missed her mouth. And her touch. The stress of the last few days melts away and is replaced by desperate need.