Buck

Chapter 9

Buck grittedhis teeth when Mari laughed at something one of her sisters said. It was a rich, full-bodied sound that invited a person to join in, and it brought an unbidden smile to his face.

She said something back and her sister nodded emphatically. He didn’t want to be charmed by her. Needed not to be. Despite his orders—and his own body’s response—to the contrary, he had rules about how he conducted himself. Rules that didn’t involve duping a completely innocent woman. Talk about one hell of a moral dilemma, one that was eating him up inside.

Avoiding her was out of the question, but interacting with her was problematic. He could see from the light in her eyes that she wanted to pick up where they left off. To gather intel, he needed to understand their process here. They were getting ready to finish up the harvest, and if one of the Navarro’s were involved in participating in Nacho’s transshipments through this region, then Buck needed to know who the players on the plantation were.

He looked at Mari again and cursed that he had to deal with all this subterfuge, going against his direct approach to life. It was too true that as SEALs, they did a variety of special operations in any environment. They often gathered intelligence behind enemy lines.

He didn’t want to look at Mari and see the enemy, but the reality of it was forced on him by the circumstances of the mission. He had gotten to know her. She trusted him because she had no reason not to do so. But he didn’t want to bend that trust this way. He wanted to tell her what was going on, but the CIA and Joker nixed it.

So, he was stuck with playing this game.

As the dinner broke up and several people started clearing, Mari’s sister, Anna, nudged her away from the table. It was clear she was steering Mari toward him. He was eager to talk to her again, eager to be with her, eager to be deep inside her. He didn’t want it mandated by his damn command.

“Buck,” she said, “I find myself saying once again. This is the last place I expected to see you. I’m thrilled, of course, but what is going on?”

He wished he could tell her everything, but he couldn’t. That made his mouth tighten.

“We’re here at the DEA’s request to protect you and your family from harm.”

Her eyes widened. “My sister said something about us being in danger. Truth be told, I’m glad you and your team are here to protect us.”

Buck wanted to shake her for being so trusting. She had no idea what she was up against. Or just how he was going to use her to get whatever dirt he could on her family. The thought, mingled with the realization of just how personal this job and Mari had become to him, increased the gut-twisting turmoil within him. His entire body was strung too tight; he felt as though he was going to snap.

“How was the rest of your trip?” he asked.

“Quite successful. I bought buildings all up and down the West Coast. The last one in San Diego.”

“In the Gaslamp Quarter?” he asked.

“Yes. It needs work, but the brick is beautiful, and the floors beneath the terrible linoleum are hardwood.” He loved the passion and the bold self-assurance in her. “I’m so excited about making it our headquarters there.”

Grateful for a conversation that kept his mind off the sensual chemistry between them, his smile was genuine. “Congratulations.”

She stepped closer, shooting everything to hell. “That means I will be making periodic trips to San Diego,” she whispered. She was standing so close, the urge to reach out and caress his fingers along her soft cheek, down the side of her neck, was nearly impossible to ignore. He slid his hands into his camo pants pockets, forcing him to keep his wayward hands to himself, and against his mission protocol, he stepped back.

Curiosity and confusion filled her blue eyes, and he wanted to break something with his bare hands. Her chin lifted, showing him that she wasn’t deterred by his behavior. She wrapped her arms around her stomach and exhaled a deep breath, then a light of understanding filled those crystal-clear orbs. She looked around. “I get it,” she added as a light, warm breeze ruffled through her silky, unbound hair. “This is too public.”

“Yeah,” he drawled. He scrubbed a hand along the evenings stubble on his jaw, hating that he had to be so…underhanded.

“Meet me in my room later. I’ll leave my French doors unlocked,” she whispered.

Heat shot to his groin, thick with the aching, pulsing need that constantly smoldered just below the surface when it came to her. Inhaling a steadying breath, he met her gaze. “Mari,” he said gruffly.

The youngest of the sisters—Carmen—rushed up to them in that barely contained energy most teenagers possessed. “I need you to help me pick out some shoes to go with my dress.”

“Carmen, manners,” Mari said.

“Oh, sorry.” She looked at him. Her mischievous eyes reminded him so much of Daisy, his heart softened. “I’m sorry for interrupting, but I need my sister. It’s a matter of life or death.” She giggled as she pulled Mari away, and he watched helplessly as she sent a sizzling look at him before she disappeared inside.

He wrestled with his moral quandary all the way back to the small warehouse the US had partitioned out with small sleeping areas strung with hammocks, accommodating all of them, including Kat and Russ and their logistical people. There was a common area with couches and an entertainment center set up. The place smelled of home sweet home for now.

“Briefing,” Blitz said, poking his head into Buck’s cubicle.

They gathered in a good-sized room with a concrete floor, which must act as the office when the warehouse was actively storing coffee. There was a clean, cut-grass scent along with wood tones from the palettes, and a burlap smell from the bags they packed the coffee in. Luckily the place had environmental controls as coffee needed to be kept at a consistent temperature.

Folding tables and electronic equipment, along with a widescreen monitor had been set up and the team was used to these types of working conditions on the fly. The room also doubled as the TOC. They were also in direct contact with the DEA Office in La Cruz and the Costa Rican drug control police, Policía de Control de Drogas.

Buck took one of the folding chairs around the plastic table. Kat came in with Russ and Joker. Joker glanced at him, and Buck got the distinct feeling that he was pissed. He hadn’t been his usual self since the crash, and it was as if something was weighing on him. The other guys filed in with D-Day sitting next to Buck.

Kat stood and flipped on the screen with a remote. “Just a refresher to begin with.” She put up a picture. “This is our primary target—Ignacio ‘Nacho’ Siachoque, head of the cartel. We, at this time, don’t know what gang he might be working with.” A picture of a grayed-out face with a question mark came onto the screen. “His former second in command, Raymondo Casadas was killed in our raid on his compound in Nicaragua.” Casadas’s face came up on the screen. Bald head, empty brown eyes, and craggy features. Buck remembered him—he’d put a bullet between his eyes. “We’re working to identify this new threat and will keep you posted.”

“Is he in Costa Rica?” Blitz asked.

“It’s been rumored that he is here, slipping over the border and hooking up with ‘friends.’ Friends who are moving their cocaine, namely,a gang who’s accepting the drugs, storing them, then shipping them out all over the world.

“Understandable,” Professor said. “This country continues to be a relevant transit hub for cocaine due to its strategic location and vast maritime territory, a perfect conduit to Colombia, Mexico, and the US.”

“There’s a lot of money to be made,” Gator said. “Unfortunately, drug trafficking and greed are turning this country into a security nightmare with contract killings, drug control disputes between armed groups, and forced recruitment of their youth.”

“We’re here to remove at least one of those cogs in the wheels,” Kat said and shut down another Shadow Syndicate—SombreSindicato— or as they refer to themselves, Sombre. “Now onto the Navarros and their plantation. It consists of ninety-six acres and produces coffee in the tons per year. Their profit is bolstered by their very exclusive and profitable hotel, Maravilla Natural. It’s part of the estate and located on an additional one hundred and fifty acres of untamed tropical forests purchased five years ago. The plantation was founded in 1808 and is still family-run by all the Navarros.

“Jorge and Isabel Navarro are the eldest living relatives who work both properties in a reduced capacity. They had two children, Francisco and Raul. Francisco died in a farming accident, leaving Raul to take over running the estate. He married Emma Solano, who he met in San Diego, and they had five children: Sofia, Anna, Maritza, Diego, and Carmen. They and their respective spouses are all part of the family business.”

Kat clicked to the first picture, showing the family. “Sofia married Victor Morales. He is their marketing whiz, and she is currently practicing medicine while helping out when necessary. They have one son who’s five and a daughter who is two.” Sofia and Victor and their daughters were all smiling for the camera.

“Anna is married to the processing manager, Marco Quesada, and they have a nine-month-old son. She handles all the hotel administration and Marco is responsible for the harvest of the final green bean product. She has her MBA, and his degree is in crop science and engineering.” She put their family picture up, Anna holding a chubby baby on their back patio.

She moved to the next sibling. There was a collective male response to her photo. Couldn’t Kat have gotten something other than Mari standing at the edge of the pool, clad in a hot pink bikini testing the water with her toes, and looking at the camera with a playful, sultry look that simply sizzled? She looked like a billionaire’s plaything. Except she was anything but. The front of his jeans suddenly felt snugger. “Maritza is unmarried and unattached.” Kat’s gaze flicked to him, then back to the screen. “She is the face of the company and the head roaster, making decisions about what coffees to present to the market. She actually has a Masters in Coffee.” She was heart-breakingly beautiful. His life had suddenly gotten so complicated. He was going to be her personal security detail, and the person who was forced to pump her for information, looking for any dirt he could find. God, he hated this mission.

“Diego is married to Fernanda, and they have two daughters, ten and twelve. He oversees all the cultivation and the greenhouse, holding a degree in Botany. His wife also has an MBA, and she handles all of the accounting and finance for the plantation and hotel.” The picture of them was the cutest. They were all dressed in the same T-shirt with the logo while planting trees. He noted that Fernanda was quite a beautiful woman.

“Their youngest, Carmen, is graduating from high school and is planning to join Anna in running the hotel when she’s finished with college.” Carmen’s solo photo was from her school picture, and he was reminded again of his younger sister, Daisy. All in all, it was a beautiful family, and he wanted no part in destroying it.

“What we don’t know is who the shipping person is. We need to run that down, unless you can find out the information directly from Maritza,” Kat said.

He clenched his jaw and gave her a curt nod while Joker watched him. Everything in him rebelled.

The best thing he could do for himself was put on his running clothes and get the hell away from people, especially his CO. The pressure was building in Joker, just like the pressure of going to Mari’s room tonight pressed in on Buck and made him want to pummel something.

As the meeting ended, Buck, lost in thought, didn’t immediately leave. When he rose and turned to go, Joker stood in the doorway to the office, his arms folded as he watched Buck. Kat was leaning against one of the tables, her butt up against the lip.

Joker didn’t say anything for a moment, then growled, “What was that?” There was something there that hadn’t been there before…the openness in his boss was gone, replaced with nothing but inflexibility. Buck knew the man was in charge. It didn’t have to be said, but even when he wanted to be accepted by the team, Joker never pulled his punches. He made his decisions and expected the team to carry them out. But now he was resolute, and there was no mistaking that this man came from Jackman Navy Royalty, that he was destined to become an admiral someday.

He met Joker’s obvious agitation with an impassive expression. He wanted him to spell it out, so the words meant something. “What was what?”

Joker scoffed, his moss-green eyes flashing. Lifting his chin in obvious confrontation, he said, “Your interaction with Maritza was tense, broadcasting that you are reluctant to engage her. I could see it. Kat saw and so did Russ.”

Buck swore softly. When he looked at Kat, she nodded. He’d wanted to get the hell out of here before he said something he would regret. Buck stared at his CO, his respect for Joker off the charts, compounding with every mission they completed. He looked away and exhaled heavily. Outside he could hear birds singing in this idyllic setting, but for him, it was paradise lost. “Tell me the parameters,” he said flatly, his fury barely controlled. “Is getting her in the sack part of the mission?”

Joker’s eyes were as piercing as a hawk. His face was leaner and etched with something that was dogging him, but he still had the same aura of power. He stepped forward, a calculating glint in his eyes. “Whatever you have to do here to get her compliant is what’s necessary. If you act differently from your time with her in San Diego and LA, she’ll feel it.”

“She’s not involved, LT. I know it. My gut says it.”

Joker came over to him, his face mottled with barely controlled rage, his eyes hard as steel. “I know you don’t want to be here, Buck. I understand what your problem is, but get over it. Now.” He jabbed Buck in the chest, his expression hostile. “This is a classified mission. Don’t risk your career on principle when you were aware of what you signed up for.” He jabbed him again, his fury making him tremble. It took all of Buck’s common sense to override his own anger. Putting hands on his LT was not going to happen. “If she cares about you, then she will understand why we needed to keep this information from her. If she doesn’t understand, do you really want that kind of trouble in your life?”

Buck shifted, his gut tied up in knots.

Joker shoved Buck’s chair angrily against the table, then paced back and forth, fury radiating from him in waves. Kat pushed off the table and took a couple of steps. The tension in the room was brittle.

Buck’s face stiff and expressionless, he watched and waited, not even attempting to convince him again. This was nonnegotiable, and he was going to have to comply no matter how hard it was going to be. Everything about being part of the brotherhood kicked in hard.

He stared at Buck, his gaze cold and unyielding. “You engage her and dig into her business, find out what’s going on here, give us the players. That’s the mission. It might not be one you approve or want to participate in, but that’s what we got. Are we clear?”

Buck wanted to hit something.

Joker gave Buck one last, drilling stare, his tone ominously quiet. “If you don’t want to do it for the mission, do it for your brothers who almost died out there.”

Cold hard reality hit Buck, and his emotions were split so hard he felt he was being torn in two.

“It’s an order, Buck. Find a way back and do what needs to be done. The sooner, the better.” He felt as if he were standing in the middle of no-man’s-land as Joker left. Without a word, Kat went after him.

With anger eating away at him, he swore savagely, so damned mad he could barely see straight. He would think this through rationally, but not now. Now he had to clear his system, or he would do something irrevocable.

* * *

“Don’tyou think you were kind of hard on him?” Kat asked, walking up to Joker, who had his hand braced against one of the windows as he stared out. She was feeling a bit tired and leaden, and all she wanted to do was crawl into a corner and die. The nausea was back, and the dull heaviness in her abdomen made her feel even more sluggish. But she forged ahead.

“Buck needs to get onboard. If we find out that someone on this plantation was responsible for anything to do with Nacho, theyre going to pay the price.”

“What happened in that mission was hard on all of us.”

He remained rigid and silent, then he took a deep jagged breath and said, “I made a bad call, Kat. I should have waited for intel, backup…something.”

The thought of losing them all filled her with a cold, killing rage, but there was nothing but compassion for Joker. “It wasn’t a bad call, Elias. You made the call that needed to be made. We had him. We were so close.”

He didn’t respond. She saw he was seething, but she wasn’t sure if that anger wasn’t more directed inward than toward Buck, who was just voicing his reluctance. His honor and integrity demanded it. Kat knew that Buck couldn’t have reacted any other way. It was who he was.

“I understand your anger.”

It was as if those few words uncorked his temper, and anger flared in his eyes, the muscles in his neck suddenly taut. “Do you?” He slammed the flat of his hand against the wall, the sound loud, making her pulse jump. “I almost lost my team. All of them. As it was, we lost three people in that debacle.”

“What is this really about?” Kat stared at him, her heart suddenly tight, the realization dawning on her with a tidal force. She knew by the tightness in his voice and the rigidity of his body that this wasn’t just about the safety of his guys, but this was much closer to the heart.

Joker remained motionless at the window, not saying anything for a long time. Finally, he said, his voice strained, “When I woke up…Pippa…her face.” The anger banked, anguish filled his eyes, and he rubbed at them. “The reality of marrying a SEAL right there for me to see. Her pain, her gut-wrenching fear. I know I can’t think about her when outside the wire, but it’s damned difficult.”

She shivered against a sudden chill, understanding Pippa’s anguish. “You don’t have to tell me,” she whispered, using her voice to pull him back. “I’ve lived it. Every moment of it, wondering, praying, hoping that Wicked always comes back to me. He is everything.” She took a hard breath. “So, maybe Buck is experiencing the beginnings of what we each have.” Kat paused, her voice soft with compassion as she added quietly, “Maybe you can think about that before you take your fear, anger, and guilt out on him.”

He went still, then inhaled sharply and shook his head. “I’m going to blame Wicked for bringing you into this life where you are close enough to figure us out, lady.”

“He’s taught me a lot of things, but I already knew all about your alpha ways, Lieutenant. He doesn’t get the credit.” She took an uneven breath. “But our road to love was pretty bumpy.”

For the first time since she had come into the room, he met her gaze, and her throat got tight when she caught a tiny glimmer of humor in his eyes.

Joker’s voice was so strained, so raw with the pain of putting Pippa through hell, and the torment of his team’s close call, it was an agony to hear. “Pippa and I…we had our differences, but in the end, it was all about love.” Kat was shocked to find herself fighting tears. What the hell was wrong with her? She interrogated hardened terrorists, and the scum of the earth without batting an eye. She never got emotional on a mission.

She nodded hearing how raw and stripped he felt, finally understanding the source of his rage. It was his beautiful wife having to endure the possibility of his death. “Yes, that’s all we fight for. Buck will find his center, and he will keep his oath and his commitment to us. We both know it. He’s just fighting himself as relentlessly as you are.”

Joker swallowed hard. “There you go again, making me think.”

“Sometimes that’s hard to get a SEAL to do. I liken it to either a stubborn fool or an ornery jackass.”

He barked out a laugh, then shook his head again, struggling to get some degree of calm, but he failed. His mouth tightened, his eyes narrowed, visibly trying to check his renewed fury. It wasn’t finished, but they would find the resources, the composure, to see this through to the end.

“We’re not leaving here until we’re done, Kat.” He didn’t say anything for a moment, then he looked at her, his expression cold and controlled, his eyes even colder. “Ignacio ‘Nacho’ Siachoque is going out either in a body bag or in our custody, and we’re going to dismantle his entire fucking organization.”

Her eyes as cold as his, she said, “He’s never going to see us coming.”

* * *

His clothes drenched in sweat,Buck stacked bags of coffee beans with the speed and precision of a robot, the ache in his shoulders turning hot and sharp. He wasn’t going to think. He’d come out here determined not to, using hard physical labor as a vent for the undercurrent of bitterness that kept trying to pull him under. He changed his clothes and stormed out of the warehouse into the hot sunlight, and in another lifetime, before the Navy had tempered him into steel, he would have gotten roaring drunk and picked a fight.

Instead, the desire not to betray his team and his country, or disrespect and dupe a woman he was caring for more than he’d ever thought he could, was burning holes in his gut.

Sweat blinded him, and he stopped and yanked off his T-shirt, using it to mop his unshaven face. After the last bag had been stacked and the foreman had thanked him profusely, he hooked his hands on his hips, trying to ease the burning tension in his shoulders. God, he hurt. From the inside out.

Exhaling heavily, he straightened, his face rigid as he downed several bottles of water. Ignoring the pain in his shoulders, he went and took a hot shower, his muscles taut and on fire.

It had taken him a lot of years to learn how to shut down and disconnect. But he had learned the lesson well at the hands of his grandfather. Disconnection was a little like riding a bronc. A good rider had to empty his mind of everything except sticking on, of holding on against every clever trick that old horse might throw. Now, he had to focus. Focus. The SEALs had taught him that as well, and combat had taught him all about letting go and trusting his training. This wasn’t much different. He had to empty his mind. He had to stay the course.

The sun was going down, and he couldn’t put this meeting with Mari off any longer. The chatter of birds echoed in the clear still air, and off in the distance, he heard a door slam.

The back of the house was just as beautifully manicured as the front. He knew the layout like the back of his hand. He had memorized it. He walked up to the French doors and turned the knob. There was a peculiar stillness in him, and he stopped, massaged his eyes, a nasty feeling settling in his gut. Exhaling sharply, he clenched his jaw and swore, then stepped inside, his commitment made.

The room was dim, only the light from the bathroom’s ajar door filtered into the shadows. He thought he was in control. He thought he was going to be able to compartmentalize his emotions into iron-clad boxes. But when she stepped out, he knew he was fucked. There was no numbing himself where Mari was concerned. She would feel it, and at this moment, he was incapable of shutting down.

“I’ve missed you,” she said softly.

His shoulders sank with resignation. He couldnt stop drinking her in, his heart doing that crazy pounding when he saw her. She was here, breathing, so near him, touchable. He clenched his fists to keep from reaching out.

“You have to remember, first and foremost, I’m your bodyguard. I’m deployed and on a mission. This isn’t normal. There’s a viable threat against your family and that includes you, as well.” Especially her. “My…our job is to keep you safe, and it will go so much more smoothly with your cooperation. Got it?”

She nodded. “Yes, sir.”

She was so goddamn sweet, looking so tempting in her see-through gown. He wanted to fuck her until the pain went away. She crossed the distance between them, grabbed the back of his neck and pulled his mouth down to hers.

He pulled her flush against him. He didn’t have to seek, she was there, and he took her mouth, then took more. His relief swelled and he unleashed it, his hands mapping her contours as the kiss turned raw, primitive. She was the hunger inside him, and he hooked her knee, drew her leg up and ground into her softness. She thrust back, her tongue pushing between his lips and doing amazing things as her fingers sank into his hair. He ached, throbbed, and died inside at what he had to do as her mouth molded savagely over his. He trapped her against the wall, her passion flooding over him, not even a SEAL could handle those kinds of waves.

There was a rushed knock against the door, the handle turning, “Zazu? I have a couple more shoes to show you. I need your opinion,” she called, caught up in her teenage angst. He knew it all too well.

He tore his mouth from hers and drew back, then he carefully laid his hands flat on the wall alongside her head. She made a soft, whimpering noise. “Ah, I love my sister, but I could kill her right now.”

He chuckled low, his dick as dangerous as a loaded weapon. He couldn’t resist her before, and now… His breathing labored with hers as he met her gaze.

“God, I love how you kiss, feel,” she breathed. She captured his mouth again, her hands running over him.

“Za? Are you asleep? Wake up!” Carmen demanded.

Mari growled, “Hold on. Give me a minute.” He let her go and hot-footed it to the French doors. She looked at him, her passion crossing the distance and like a physical caress, stroked his erection, hardening it into a painful agony.

Then he slipped into the night, knowing that there was only one thing he could do to relieve this need, and solidify his mission. Regardless of his conscience, he wanted her, and he was going to have her.