Chapter 9
Emmy
After getting my things from Cole’s trailer, I climb into Cas’s truck, angling myself away from him and towards the window. I don’t want to look at him and see pity in his eyes. I’m absolutely mortified by the names that Chad was calling me and the things he was saying, but even more so from the fact that I told Chad I was sleeping with Cas, and he for sure heard every word of it. How could I be so stupid? As if Cas would want someone like me. Like Chad said, I was no good anyway. You know what? As soon as we get back to the house, I am just going to go online and start looking for somewhere else to live. Oh my god, but then it’s going to be awkward at the job site. Ok, so I am just going to have to go and get another job then. I’m sure I’ll find something. I’m mulling everything over and notice that Cas hasn’t even set off yet; he’s just sat there, and I can feel his eyes bore into me. This is it. This is where he’s going to tell me I’m not worth it and that Chad’s right. It’s where he tells me living with him isn’t working.
“Don’t do that, Emmy”
his voice makes me jump because it’s so low and deep, almost like he’s growling out the words. Confused, I turn to look at him, and he sees the question in my eyes “Don’t let that waste of space get in your head. Whatever you’re thinking right now, I can assure you that it isn’t anything like what I’m thinking or feeling. Do you understand?”
I nod my head, not trusting to say anything in case I burst into tears and start ugly crying. I turn back towards the window, rest my head on it, and he starts the truck. I can’t believe he knows what I’m thinking or feeling, like he's in tune with me.
I pull out my phone and shoot Hayleigh a message to let her know what happened and explain that I understand if I can’t be in the wedding anymore, especially considering Cas broke Chad’s nose. I’m just about to put my phone away when it starts buzzing, and Hayleigh’s face fills the screen as I answer it. Before I can even say hello, I can see she is scowling at me, and I’m a bit scared of what she is going to say.
“I swear to everything that is holy Emmy if you even think of stepping out of this wedding again, I am going to have no choice but to give you a little bitch slap. Do I make myself clear?”
“I just don’t want to cause any issues with the wedding, that’s all”
“Emmy for fuck sake it isn’t you that’s causing the issue and Pete knows that, Jesus even his mum knows that it isn’t you. It’s honestly scary, though, what Chad is doing. It really isn’t right. I’m just so sorry he keeps doing this. Where are you now?”
“I’m just on my way back home with Cas”
I see Hayleigh wag her eyebrows, and I try to give her a warning stare that hopefully conveys not to open her trap, but nope, no such luck.
“Oh, I bet you’re going home with Cas! All that testosterone…”
I don’t give Hayleigh the chance to finish. I tell her I love her and quickly end the call. I can feel my cheeks burning, but Cas laughs it off.
When we pull up to the house, he switches the engine off and turns in his seat to face me. “Look at me, Emmy.”
I turn to face him “I heard what you said to Chad about us”
oh god here it is, it’s now he tells me I’m ridiculous and he could never go for someone like me “and if would help for us to pretend, you know to get Chad off your back, then just know Emmy that I’m all in”
there’s something in his eyes as if he genuinely means it and my stomach does a flip at the thought, but it must just be the stress of what happened because Cas is only being friendly. Or does he really mean it?
When I walk through the door, Scruff bounds over to me, wagging his tail, and I drop to the floor and wait for him to jump into my lap. He gives the best cuddles, and it’s just what I need after the day I’ve had. I’m already attached to the little guy. Cas comes in, dumps our bags in the hallway, and stands over me with his hands outstretched. I put my hands in his, and he pulls me up and wraps me up in a hug. I swear everything in me melts.
“Go relax in the living room for me, I’ll be back in a few minutes”
Then he lets go of me and disappears upstairs. Wondering what that was about, I headed to the fridge to get a drink and sat in the living room with Scruff. I must doze off because Cas is gently shaking me awake.
“Sorry, I must have nodded off”
I look to Cas and see he’s showered and changed.
“I’ve gotta head on out to the club tonight, I’m sorry it’s shitty timing but I have to be there”
“Cas, it’s fine, really. You go…do your thing”
I wince at the awkwardness, but he smiles at me.
“Ok, well if you need anything just give me a ring, yeah? I’ve run you a bath, by the way”
Then he kisses me on the cheek and heads off out.
Part of me is grateful for him, but the other part is sad because I’m alone, and it’s the last thing I want. I sit there for a few minutes before getting up and going upstairs. I push into the bathroom and see that the bath is filled with bubbles, the petals I like to use, and the book I’ve been reading lately resting on the side of the tub. Shedding my clothes, I climb in and lie back.
For the next hour, I turn myself into a prune and read a few chapters of my romance novel. I swish in the water and notice it’s no longer hot but lukewarm. Putting my book down, I fish around for the plug and climb out. I feel refreshed and relaxed, but the sad feeling is still there. I’ve just finished putting my PJs on when I hear the doorbell. I briefly worry whether or not it’s Chad for round 3, but then I shake that thought away because, as far as I know, he doesn’t know where I now live.
Scruff is barking his head off at the door, and whoever is on the other side rings the bell nonstop. I yank the door open ready to just about give the person on the other side an earful and stop in my tracks when I see Hayleigh standing there grinning her head off with some chocolates and my favourite box wine (or shitty box wine as she likes to call it). I’m so shocked that she’s just turned up that I burst into tears. She takes one look at me and dives in, wrapping me up in a hug.
“Aww, what the bloody hell are you crying for, Emmy? I’m not that ugly, am I? And here I thought you loved me”
I chuckle and sniffle into Hayleigh’s hair and mumble “, Mm’sorry”
She shushes me and rubs my back. We pull apart, and she shakes her head at me “What are we going to do with you, eh?”
“How did you know I was home?”
She’s just about to answer me when the doorbell rings again. She looks at me as if I know who it is, and I shrug.
Hayleigh turns to the door “I’ll answer it then, and hold that thought we will come back to that in a minute”
When the door swings open, I see it’s a guy waiting with a food delivery. Hayleigh looks back to me “Did you order food?”
I shake my head no, and she turns back to the guy “Are you sure that food delivery is for this address?”
The guy checks the receipt “Yep. CJ is a regular. He said this was for his roommate”
Hayleigh thanks the delivery guy and takes the food, and when she turns to me, her face is practically breaking in two.
“Wow, he has got it really bad, Emmy!”
Hayleigh cackles as she walks into the kitchen.
“Don’t be daft, no, he hasn’t. He’s just being nice because of what happened today, that’s all”
Hayleigh turns around, giving me a look that says she thinks I’m stupid. “Oh, Emmy, you really are clueless. That wanker really did do a number on you didn’t he?”
she starts to dish out the food for us and I grab us two wine glasses and begin to fill them then remember that Hayleigh is on a detox. She notices and shakes her head “Oh no, you don’t! The detox doesn’t count when the best friend is sad, so pour away my friend”
“Hayleigh?”
“Hmm?”
“Why do you think Cas has it bad?”
“I’ll tell you why Emmy, because no one who doesn’t have it bad would run you a bath, come over to the best friend’s house to arrange for her to come over, however, can I just clarify I already was going to come over anyway but that’s not the point. He then orders you all your favourite Chinese food’s. Now you tell me, why do I think he has it bad?”
she smiles at me and despite my efforts I can’t help but smile back. We move everything over to the living room and Hayleigh puts on the TV and idly starts flicking through before she lands on a romcom. I’m just about to tuck in when the bloody doorbell rings yet again.
“Christ on a bike it’s like spaghetti junction in here today!”
I grumble as I get up but when I swing the door open my mouth drops open at the ginormous bouquet of flowers floating in the air. I stand shellshocked before a muffled voice tells me to hurry up and grab them. I take them off the delivery guy and he shake his head and mumbles something as he walks away but I’m too bloody shocked to say anything to him. I bring the flowers in, and Hayleigh turns around on the couch her mouth dropping open and mirroring mine.
“Shitting hell look at those beauties!”
she scrambles on and over the back of the couch and comes to grab the card inside them and I swear I see little hearts fly out of her eyes as she melts “Aww Emmy”
I take the card from her and read it.
‘I hope these make you smile. Cas x’
“Hmm-mm I rest my case”
Hayleigh’s smug smile turns into both of us giggling like school girls. As we dig into the food and watch the film my mind wanders to Cas’s thoughtfulness and his offer to help keep Chad off my back. Could I really live with Cas as my roommate and then fake a relationship without completely obliterating my heart in the process?
“Penny for your thoughts Em?”
“Nothing much, just thinking about the wedding.”
“You best not be thinking about ditching my wedding again?”
Hayleigh pins me with a glare.
I shake my head at her, “No, of course not”, but she gives me a look that tells me she doesn’t believe me at all.
“No, I wasn’t. I was actually thinking about maybe doing something together, something fun before your wedding, one that won’t interfere with your detox.”
Hayleigh nods and chews her food “Now that’s more like it. Let me know when and where and I am there. Now come on let’s finish our food and this film”
we settle in and finish our food and before I know it my eyes grow heavy, and I drift off before the guy gets the girl.
I hear the front door click shut and for a moment I tense wondering if Cas will be mad that I’ve fallen asleep on the couch or if I’ll hear him mutter about making a mess seeing as I don’t remember falling asleep or Hayleigh leaving. I keep my eyes closed and I feel a blanket drape over me and then Cas’s cologne is everywhere and I feel his lips on my head as he kisses me and he whispers so low I almost don’t hear it “Goodnight beautiful”
and then I hear his footsteps up the stairs and him go into bed. I don’t want to move just yet so I wait to make sure he will be asleep, and I take the blanket and head on upstairs.
I walk to Cas’s door, and I want nothing more than to knock and ask him what it all means and if it’s all just friendly or is it something more but I chicken out and settle for just placing my hand on his door. I turn around, go into my room, and climb into bed, my head filling with everything Cas.
My alarm wakes me up with it’s ridiculous beeping and I groan shutting it off. I pad downstairs and see that Cas has already left but he’s prepped the coffee maker for me and on the counter is a bag from the local bakery with my favourite cinnamon rolls inside. I smiled at the thoughtfulness and wanted to do something nice for Cas, so I started making him the one thing I know I can make well: beef stew and dumplings. I lose myself in chopping veggies when my phone pings, I open it up and see it’s Cas.
Cas
Good morning! Hope you have a good day today (smiley face emoji) xx
I smile at his good morning message and type back
Me
Good morning to you too. Thank you for the coffee and cinnamon roll (smiley face emoji) I’m making something nice tonight for you, to say thank you xx
Cas
You don’t need to keep thanking me, Emmy. Enjoy the rest of your day and see you later xx
I smile like a giddy teenager and finish putting everything in the slow cooker for the beef stew. Once done, I sit down with my laptop and log on. I start to research popular hen party ideas that don’t involve alcohol, but there aren’t many. Then I spotted a blog with ideas for hen parties, and one of the entries caught my eye. I click on it, and it takes me to a page with a local chocolatier that offers classes on making chocolate, and an idea pops into my head. I fire off a quick message to the chocolatier confirming the time and date.
I create a group chat with all the girls from Hayleigh’s last hen party and both her mum and Peter’s mum, I worry for a second about texting her since I’m not with Chad anymore but then remember that Hayleigh said they’re all well aware he is in the wrong.
Me
Hey girls! I know Hayleigh has already had her hen party, but I am going to throw her a bridal shower next weekend. I hope you all can make it. Don’t forget to bring a gift! Here are the details
Chrissy’s Chocolate Heaven
Chocolate Making Masterclass
7 pm Saturday 14th
Feeling pretty productive, I started browsing what I would buy for Hayleigh and Pete. I must spend a few hours surfing the web when I see a list of gift ideas on Pinterest and find one that has me howling with laughter. I click on the link, and it takes me to a well-known website where I can buy a Clone-A-Willy Moulding Kit for a reasonable price of ￡36.99. Because I like the colour, I bought it in neon pink, and then I felt bad because I didn’t have Pete anything, so I purchased the Clone-A-Pussy Moulding Kit in pink as well.
I get up and go into the kitchen, my stomach rumbling because it’s lunchtime, and I root around the fridge for something to eat. Cas and I haven’t been shopping, so there isn’t anything to eat. I huff and shut the fridge door then scream bloody murder when I see Cas bent over reading my laptop screen. At hearing me scream, he jumps a mile as if getting caught doing something he shouldn’t be and holds his hand to his heart.
“Shit me Emmy you scared the crap out of me”
we’re both catching our breath and then my cheeks blaze red when I realise what he must be reading.
I stammer “uh…that…that there…is not for me. It’s a bridal shower present for Hayleigh and Pete.”
I watch Cas smirk and nod, and then he holds up a bag. “I brought us lunch. Are you not too busy?”
Despite my embarrassment, I laugh, and we move to the island to sit and eat lunch.
“So, Clone-A-Willy, eh?”
I groan and cover my face.
“Oh jeez, please do not tell anyone I’ve bought those. I just thought they would be a fun gift for them to use,”
I shrug my shoulders trying to act nonchalant, but my cheeks still burn with embarrassment and if I’m being honest, part need.
“So, what are you planning on doing for the bridal shower?”
Cas asks me in between bites of his food.
“Well, I found and booked this cute place called Chrissy’s Chocolate Heaven. They offer a chocolate-making master class, and I thought it would be fun for everyone, especially Hayleigh.”
I feel a bit defensive and tense, ready for him to tell me it’s a silly juvenile idea.
Still, as always he surprises me by nodding along “I think that’s a great idea and will definitely not be expected. I could be a designated driver if you like? I could even get Vik on the job. He and Tanya have a thing for each other, so he should say yes?”
I smile at him “Thanks Cas, that will help a lot.”
We finish our lunch, and I start clearing off the table as Cas takes our rubbish to the bin. I turn around but don’t see Scruff’s squeaky dog bone on the floor, so I end up standing on it, which then causes Scruff to think it’s play time. He’s bouncing around between my feet and while I try and get away, I lose my footing and end up falling face first into Cas’s back, my hands flying forward to stop my fall which knocks him forward into the cabinets in the kitchen.
I’m mortified as I realise that my feet are slipping backwards on the kitchen tiles and my hands scramble around Cas’s waist but because I’m slipping, they end up much lower than I intended. Oh god kill me now, how on earth am I supposed to play this off.
Neither of us is moving and obviously one of us will have to make a move to get up and stand apart. Cas’s hands are clenched into fists on the kitchen side and his knuckles are white, for a brief moment I worry that it’s because I’ve upset him but then I feel the reason why and holy macaroni he is big…like B-I-G big! All of this happens in a few seconds, but it feels like an eternity and even longer now that I am standing here contemplating how to get up properly. Finally, Cas speaks, but his voice is so strained that I almost laugh.
“Emmy?”
“Yes”
I whisper.
“I don’t think you’re ready for what I really wanna do right now, so I’m going to need you to move your hands, ok?”
“Oh”
I don’t mean to sound all breathless, but it causes Cas to groan. My legs are still splayed behind me and because I’m not a bloody acrobat the only way I can move is to kneel down on the floor.
When Cas turns around and sees me kneeling on the floor, he bites his lip and groans again “Jesus Christ Emmy, you’re killing me”
then he holds out his hands to help me up.
We stand there staring at each other, and something passes between us. I find that I actually want him to take my head in his hands and kiss me, but just like my luck in life, his phone rings. He looks up to the ceiling and gives me an apologetic look and I know he needs to head back to work, but part of me wonders what it would be like to give in with him and let go?