Chapter Thirty-Four
THIRTY-FOUR
ASPETH
Dinner is far more fun than it should be. I know I’m supposed to be distracting Hawk and keeping him busy so the others can work on the counterfeit pass, but I’ve forgotten how enjoyable it can be to just talk to him. He’s as obsessed with the guild as I am, but has a jaded, almost world-weary view of it while mine is more optimistic. He’s sick of the politics, but still loves the joy of finding something new and exciting.
“Not that I get the chance to much anymore,” he admits. “I’m too busy on rescue missions. It’s like the guild isn’t training anyone worth a damn any longer. I’m constantly being shuffled off to haul out some twit who didn’t realize he was digging next to a support beam and collapsed an entire cave. Or some Five’s gearmaster forgot to pack rations and now they’re all too weak to make it back to the surface on their own.” He shakes his head, making a face. “Who mucking forgets to pack food?”
It does sound idiotic.
Hawk eats three more servings of soup and I devour nearly a full loaf of bread, especially after the barkeep brings me a tiny pot of honey to dip the delicious bread in. We sip ale, too, but it’s expensive and we don’t want to drink Hawk’s funds away.
He refuses to admit that he’s afraid of spiders. Says I’m exaggerating.
He does mention that his name was Wallach before he became Hawk.
I try not to hold it against him.
He also mentions that he picked the name Hawk because it sounded fearsome…and it was easy to spell. “I’m not good with those little feather quill pens the guild uses,” he says, turning his palms up. “My hands are too big. So the less I write out, the better.”
“It’s incredible timing you got the name when you did. I imagine there’s always a ‘Hawk’ in the guild.”
“There is, and timing has nothing to do with it.” One side of his mouth draws up in a smile. “The old Hawk was getting ready to retire. I made sure I did him a few favors and hinted that I wanted the name when he was heading out. He decided to retire the same day I graduated to full artificer.”
Clever. Clever and sneaky.
He tells me that someday he’d like to be a guild master, training his own recruits. “No Taurian’s ever been a guild master before, though,” he says with a shake of his head. “We’re too valuable in our retrieval roles, I guess.”
It makes me sad, because he’d be an excellent—if stern—teacher. I should know. He’s done more to prepare us for the tunnels than Magpie has, but she gets all the credit.
Well, so to speak. I’m not sure she’s bragging about us at the moment. So far all we’ve found is a dead body.
Okay, and a ring.
That we stole.
And I plan to steal a second one.
My thoughts turn in circles as I finish off the bread and I worry that the others aren’t managing without me. Which is silly, but I still want to know what’s going on. I feign a small yawn, smiling at Hawk, and then lick a droplet of honey from my thumb. “I must be tired after all of those weapons drills earlier.”
“You need your sleep. When the Conquest Moon’s upon me, I’m not going to let you have a moment’s rest.” His gaze is locked on my thumb, and he pushes his bowl aside. “Shall we head home?”
Even though he’s not looking me in the eye, I feel scorched by the intensity of his gaze. I know he’s thinking about sex. I know I certainly am. I flick my tongue over my thumb again and his tail slaps against the nearest chair so hard it sounds like a whip cracking.
Something inside me clenches with arousal, and I suspect if I dropped under the table right now, he’d let me. The thought fills me with heat, and while I’m a little appalled, I’m also titillated at the idea. “Are we…cutting through an alley?”
Is that me suggesting something lascivious? Absolutely.
This time, I absolutely see a hint of red gleaming in his eyes. “Aye.”
I should be alarmed, but instead, I’m excited. “Then let’s go.”
He plunks down a coin with a meaningful slap onto the table and then rises to his feet. As he does, I get an absolutely obscene eyeful of the bulge in his pants, so thick and heavy that it’s obvious to all what’s going on. I glance around the near-empty tavern but luckily the barkeep is busy polishing a glass and the slitherskins aren’t looking in our direction. There are a couple of humans near the hearth who smirk at us, and when Hawk growls low and terrifying, they quickly pay attention to their mugs again.
Hawk takes me by the hand and all but hauls me out after him. I’m breathless with excitement, and not entirely surprised when we stop by a familiar alley across from the brothel. There’s no one outside of it except for a couple of sex workers looking for customers, but it doesn’t matter. He pushes me up against the nearest shadowy wall and tugs on the front of my bodice, freeing one of my breasts from its corseted cage and holding it to his mouth, an offering. He sucks on the tip so fiercely it’s a mixture of pleasure and pain, and I whimper, digging my hands into his clothing.
“Fuck. I’ve been staring at these pretty tits all night, watching them heave with every breath you take. How am I supposed to concentrate?” He flicks his thumb over my nipple and then lowers his head again, nipping and sucking on the sensitive tip. “Want to fuck you, Aspeth. Are you ready?”
That makes me pause. “You—do you mean here ? In the alley? Or in general? Because I’d rather my first time not be in the streets—”
“Not here,” he growls, and when he looks up at me, his eyes are gleaming red in the moonlight. “Home. Tonight. But I’m gonna make you come first.”
And he mouths my nipple with such obscene dedication that all I can do is moan and cling to him. His tongue is big and broad, and it feels as if he’s going to swallow my entire breast, but he only teases it, toying with my nipple until it’s flushed and sensitive and every brush of his lips over my skin is making everything tingle.
He pulls up my skirts and fits me against his hips. “Wrap your legs around me.”
I do, panting, and when he bucks his hips against mine, I realize he’s freed his cock from his pants and the hard length of him is rubbing against my pussy underneath my layers of clothing.
“Where are your drawers?” he grits out, surprised when his cock slicks through the folds of my pussy.
“Not…wearing tonight,” I manage, locking my arms around his neck. “We’re not having sex here, right?”
“Just rubbing,” he promises me. “Fuck, you feel so good.” His cock glides through the wetness of my folds, dragging and striking against everything, and it feels as if I’ve caught on fire when the head of him slides against my clit. “I’m going to come on you, mark you with my seed. Your pussy is going to be soaked.”
I gasp at what a filthy mental image it is. “Do it.”
Hawk groans, thrusting against me, and then hot seed spills all over my skin even as he shudders over me. He comes, and it’s a rich mess of slick heat that spurts over my thighs and pussy, coating my skin. I cling to him, watching his face as he climaxes, and it’s fascinating how tightly wound he is…and then seeing him relax with a haze of pleasure. I scratch absently at the short, stubbly fur that covers his neck, the deep russet that almost matches his guild uniform.
He leans over me, nearly crushing me to the wall. “Too fast,” he manages. “I should have lasted longer.”
“I didn’t mind.” I squirm a little, because I’m wet and sticky down below my skirts and it’s a strange feeling.
Hawk rubs his big head over the top of mine. “But you didn’t come, did you? And after I promised I’d take good care of you.”
His hand slips under my skirts, sliding into the wetness between my thighs. I whimper in surprise as his fingers drag through my labia, seeking my clit—and then I hiss because I’m so wet down there that his gentle, seeking fingers practically glide over my skin. He holds me close, murmuring sweet nonsense in my ear about how pretty I am and how much he likes it when I lose control, and all the while my thighs quiver and quake as he fingers me into bliss.
“That’s better.” He presses his muzzle to my sweaty brow in what must be a Taurian version of a forehead kiss, and then gently sets me onto my feet. I sway, knees weak, and he puts a supporting arm around my waist, even as he adjusts my skirts, smoothing them so they hang properly. Once that’s done, he adjusts my bodice, tucking my shameless breast back into my chemise and then adjusting the entire thing so my clothing looks pristine…and hides the mess between my thighs.
I flush just thinking about it, because it’s obscene and naughty and I’m enjoying being obscene and naughty with him far more than I should. “Well, now,” I say, and take a tottering step forward. Sure enough, everything between my thighs is wet, wet, wet. I’m not going to be able to take a step without thinking about him and what we did. How he came this close to taking my virginity in a dirty alley across from a whorehouse.
It makes me pause. “Hawk? If we have sex tonight, you can make me pregnant, correct?”
He looks down at me, incredulous. “You’re asking now?”
“Seems like a good time to ask.”
“Aye, I can.” His voice is terse, and I suspect this is just now occurring to him, too. “There are charms we can use but…I don’t have any on hand. It usually falls to the woman to handle such things.”
“When was I supposed to get a charm?” I ask him. “Before I came to Vastwarren and everyone would wonder who Lady Aspeth was fucking? Or after I got here, in between drills?”
Hawk grunts. “Excellent point. I’ll get you one.”
But that changes things. We were intending to head back to the dorm and have sex tonight. We’re both ready, and we both want it. Except…“If we’re going to have sex, shouldn’t you get one before we do?”
He runs a hand down his face. “I’ll get one first thing in the morning.”
“So you and I…tomorrow, then?”
“Aye, tomorrow.” He squeezes my hand. “We still have time before the Conquest Moon.”
“How much time, exactly?”
He rubs the back of his neck with his other hand, expression awkward. “The morning?”
Oh goodness. Not much time at all. “And it has to be before then?”
He nods. “So I can be gentle. I don’t trust myself once the hand of the god is fully upon me. Not with it being your first time and all.”
I chew on my lip as we walk back to the guild dormitory in silence. I should be thinking about the Conquest Moon but instead, I find myself thinking about what happens afterward. I haven’t allowed myself to think that far ahead, yet now I can’t seem to stop. What does the future look like if I take the rings and head back to my family’s hold?
What does the future look like if I stay Hawk’s wife?
I’ve never really allowed myself to dream about what happens next. It’s always been assumed that I would marry to keep the family bloodline going, and that it would be to someone who brings either wealth or artifacts to reinforce our claim upon Honori Hold. My parents were an arranged marriage, and their parents before them. I’ve never contemplated what I’d do if I wasn’t tied to the hold and its obligation to its people.
But if I could…
I’d love to stay. Join the guild. Hunt for artifacts. More than that, I’d love to simply research and study the ones that the guild has. Immerse myself in the Old Prellian culture that I love as much as everyone else in the guild. Go cave diving at my husband’s side.
Come home to him every night and curl up in his arms and talk about nothing more urgent than the day’s findings (or lack thereof).
I suddenly want that so badly I ache. My eyes burn with unshed tears and I blink rapidly, holding tightly to Hawk’s hand.
This is what happens when I allow myself to dream, so I won’t think about it at all. It hurts too much.
We’re quiet as we walk back to the guild dorm, both of us lost in thought. I keep my hand tucked in his, though, because I’m afraid of letting go. I think about Hawk’s words, about how this is no longer convenient, no longer transactional, and he’s right. I’m feeling entirely too much and I’m terrified of what this could mean.
As we head up the sloping street toward Magpie’s nest, I see a light shining in the window. I check the front of my bodice again, immediately feeling as if I’m back in the alley with one breast hanging out. “Someone stayed up late.”
“Never a good sign.” Hawk gives my hand a squeeze and then releases it. “Let me talk to whoever it is. Keep quiet and stay behind me.”
As a holder’s daughter, I’ve never stayed quiet, much less hid behind a man. My back stiffens. “It’s probably Gwenna.”
“Or your ex finding out you’ve married and come to cause trouble.”
My mouth snaps shut. He might be right. I tuck my cloak tight around my dress and let him take the lead.
Inside the dorm hall, there are two men seated on the bench, both in guild livery. One jumps up the moment we step through the doorway.
“The guild needs all Taurians in the city to report to the Everbelow,” the first one says. “There’s been a terrible accident.”