Chapter 1 - Mira #2
Another thing I can be grateful for is that the elders made sure I had a state-of-the-art workshop in the tech lab.
It’s somewhere between a mad scientist’s lair and a cozy den for thinking and planning.
I have the latest and best computers, high-speed internet, and infinite storage capability and memory to run intensive programs. I have every tool I can dream of, and I can build anything my heart desires.
Both online and in the real world. My workspace is a neat array of wires, motherboards, rare metals, soldering equipment, neat drawers of electronic bits and pieces, and a wall of tools—literally anything and everything I need to bring my ideas to life.
The scary thing is that no one monitors the work I do here.
Yes, I have superiors in the tech lab, but mostly they leave me alone and only rear their heads when they want to take credit for whatever I’ve made.
So no one tracks my work. No one would understand it anyway… maybe Killian, my assistant, but that’s beside the point. I could dismantle this compound with the click of a button, yet somehow I still get no respect.
Apart from Kelsey, Killian is the only one who admires what I do.
To be honest, I think he has a crush on me.
Or rather, my brain. He’s a nice guy. Two years younger than me, and very sweet.
But I’m not interested. And it’s nothing personal.
He’s not my type, fine, but that’s not the point.
The point is that I don’t think I will ever date anyone…
ever. Not after what I felt when Jace rejected me.
My wolf cringes and snarls at the idea of me even admiring the sight of another man who isn’t Jace.
She hates Jace. But she can’t stop her natural instincts.
A lot of Omegas date other Omegas, so it wouldn’t be frowned upon for Killian and me to end up together, even though he’s younger than me.
It would actually be expected for someone of my low social status to date an Omega.
Some Omegas date Betas. And others are holding off and staying single while they wait for the Alpha to return in the hope that they will be his fated mate.
A load of bullshit if you ask me. Desperate girls who think their entire identity would be fulfilled if they were fated to the Alpha. Don’t they have any drive? Any self-respect?
My brain is both my superpower and my curse. When you’re this smart, it’s hard to suffer fools, but even harder to build relationships with other pack members. My friends are scarce, but the ones I have are everything to me. I’d do anything for them.
Kelsey is smart, too, but she hates being stuck indoors.
I tried to get her to be my assistant in my lab, but she went crazy after two days.
She works with the pack security team, which is rare for an omega because we are caregivers and creators and usually considered too weak for security work.
Supposedly, we are calmer than the Betas.
But her stubborn drive got her the position, and she spends her afternoons on patrol around our territory, protecting our estate on the shore of Devil’s Lake in the Rose Falls Reservation.
Crazy Kelsey. That’s her nickname because she won’t conform to the norms of the pack.
Sometimes I think she specifically chose not to become one of the caregivers or creators as a way of saying stuff-you to her parents for selling her or to the Alpha who purchased her to fulfill a certain role.
I think she’s inspiring and one of the strongest women I know. Hence why she’s my best friend. Stubborn, funny, and a little crazy.
Kelsey kicks a rock as we walk close to the river, just off the path that leads to the Omegas’ cottages. “I don’t see why they can’t just tell the pack that you’re the one who makes all the cool stuff,” she huffs.
“What difference would it make?” I shrug.
“You really aren’t bothered?” she scoffs. “I’d be furious. I am furious with you.”
“I think it is a waste of time to be bothered by that kind of stuff. Stuff I can’t change. I’m happy to make it. And I’m happy it works.”
She shakes her head, bending down to pick up a rock, then skipping it across the surface of the stream. “I tell anyone who will listen that my best friend is the one who makes our tech stuff.”
“And do they believe you?” I laugh.
She smirks. “I’ll make them believe me,” her smile spreads wide.
Just as I’m about to tell her not to waste her energy, a young shifter comes bolting past us, yelling loudly and incoherent excitement.
“What in the world!” Kelsey shouts, spinning around to dodge the kid.
“He hasn’t got his wolf yet, but he’s definitely got the zoomies, “she laughs.
Another three kids run past us, and Kelsey manages to grab one of them and pull them to a stop.
“What’s going on?” She demands.
The kid's eyes go wide with fright, then wider with excitement. “They’re back!” the kid shouts.
“Detroit, you have to be more specific than that. Who is back?” she scolds.
“The Alpha! And the Beta! They’re back from Black Ops!” Detroit starts wiggling with chaotic excitement, and Kelsey releases him. “Good heavens, he’s a little savage,” she groans, dusting her hands on her jeans.
My heart is sitting in the pit of my stomach.
My jaw clenches tightly, and my head begins to spin.
My wolf, Mika, wakes up, and from deep inside my chest, I feel the rumble of her anger.
She doesn’t speak to me in words, but I can feel her in the same way I feel myself.
I know what she is thinking and what she wants.
I will tear that black wolf to pieces! Mika snarls inside my mind.
But at the same time, a deep yearning floods me.
I hate that I still feel so drawn to him. The man who tore me apart.
Mika feels my pain and kicks harder at the restraints inside my mind, trying to shift into wolf form.
She wants to keep me safe from him. She is my best friend.
My protector. My wolf. She is me. But she is herself.
While we live in sync most of the time, there are moments, like this one, where she goes wild and I struggle to control her.
“Mira?” Kelsey grabs my arm to stop me from swaying as I try to calm Mika down and stop her from shifting me into wolf form so she can take the lead.
“What’s going on?” she asks, worried.
“My brother and Jace,” I grumble. I look up at Kelsey, and she catches the yellow glow that flashes in my eyes just before I manage to push Mika down. Another moment or two and Mika would have shifted me.
“Is Mika ok?” She asks, placing her hand gently on my shoulder. Kelsey knows what it’s like to have a wolf living inside you. To be part wolf and part girl. Her wolf, Kala, can be just as feisty.
“Not really,” I sigh, “her emotions are all over the place.”
“Right, can we blame her though? That guy is a first-class asshole,” Kelsey mutters. “I swear, Kala would like to rip one of his arms off…given the chance,” she smirks. Kelsey’s wolf is a beautiful girl with pale grey fur and pale blue eyes. During the pack runs, she and Mira always stick together.
Ok. So, Jace is back. So what? This doesn’t have to mean anything.
No one knows what happened. No one except Kelsey… and Jace, of course.
That day has played over in my thoughts a thousand times since it happened.
I had only just turned eighteen. Jace was two years older. Strangely enough, he was one of my biggest bullies throughout school and growing up… until that night, at the Silver Moon party at the end of the Summer festival.
The festival lasts for days, and during that time, for the first time ever, Jace wasn’t being a complete douchebag. For the first time ever, he was treating me like a member of the pack. Like his friend. Even his wolf, Jux, wanted to run with Mika during the night hunt.
And it was doing wild things to my heart.
Jace was showing me another side to him. He wasn’t the bully I’d always known. He was gentle, tender, and protective. He was kind to me, and he was the most gorgeous man I’d ever seen in my life.
Throughout the festival, we flirted with each other, teased a little, and played around.
He was the first guy I ever flirted with.
The first man I ever felt connected enough to even consider that with.
I decided that I wanted him to be my first. It felt right.
But first I had to pluck up the courage to kiss him.
It was after the festival, though, at the Silver Moon party, where it actually happened.
We were sitting on the green grass out by Devil’s Lake, away from the crowds and the chaos. Loud music was spilling across the lake's surface, and the moon was reflected on it like a rippling piece of art. Brighter than I’d ever remember seeing it. My senses were heightened.
My heart was beating a thousand miles an hour when Jace shifted closer to me and placed his hand behind me on the grass with his arm against my back, leaning his weight against his arms as though it was the most natural thing in the world.
All I felt was heat. Beautiful, intense heat, spilling from him into me.
My entire body became flooded with that heat, and my wolf started going crazy.
Mika was begging me to get closer to Jux. She needed to be closer to Jace’s wolf. She made my body spike with electricity that I could barely control.
It was she who pushed me to be as bold as I was.
I remember turning to face him and cupping my hand over his jaw. His eyes flared with desire. I could smell it on him. Need. Lust. An urgency so deep there was no mistaking it.
In a flash, he’d pushed me onto my back and was lying on top of me in the grass. His lips found mine, and his solid, beautiful body was moving against me.
He pushed his tongue into my mouth. I could taste him, and my senses were alive with his scent and the current of his pulse.
That moment was the most intense, heightened experience of my life.
When he pulled away and looked down at me, I couldn’t hold back the words.
“I think you’re my fated mate,” I whispered.
At first, he said nothing, but his eyes softened. Tenderness flowed into them. But almost as soon as the warmth came, it turned to fire, and he pushed away from me in a rage.
He sat up and half turned his back on me.
I sat in stunned silence, wondering why those words were so offensive to him. Surely he felt it too? Surely he knew what it meant. They always tell you that you’ll know when you meet your mate. There will be no mistaking it. I was so sure. I thought I knew. Mika thought she knew too.
Jace stood and looked down at me with that all too familiar cruelty back in his pitch black eyes.
“I, Jace Greenwood, reject you as my mate, Miranda Nelson,” he said.
My mouth dropped open. It was a double-edged sword. He agreed that he felt it too. He was agreeing that I was his mate… but he was also ripping the golden thread of fate that pulled us together right out of my chest to disconnect me from him.
Pain burned through me like a scorching fire, uncontrolled, blazing, and destroying everything inside me.
My wolf howled in agony, and I wrapped my arms around my chest to try and hold her together, to try and keep her safe.
“Why would you say that?” I gasped, pain in my voice, tears streaming down my cheeks.
Jace shook his head. He swallowed hard, and I could see the pain his wolf was in, too. Or maybe I was wrong. Maybe he felt nothing.
He turned away from me and walked back to the party.
Out of everything that has ever happened in my life, that was the moment that truly broke me. All of the bullying, all of the pain of childhood, was nothing in comparison.
It was a moment of such intense pain that I will never be able to forget it as long as I live. No matter how hard I try.
I sat alone, sobbing until I could barely breathe. Mika was shattered. She didn’t come out or speak a word to me for weeks after that. She didn’t want to run; she didn’t want to hunt. She only hid.
I think she retreated to protect me from her pain, to carry it on her own.
It took us a very, very long time to overcome what happened that night.
And the thing that saved us was that shortly after the Silver Moon party, Jace and my brother, Miles, left for Black Ops training.
It gave me time to heal. I had space away from him to do my best to recover and pull myself together.
I focused on my studies and building a life for myself in the compound. I built a career and made friends.
It’s a life that might not be what I always dreamed of, but it’s a good enough life. I have friends. I have a purpose. I get to do a job that challenges me and that I enjoy.
I often feel alone or displaced, but I deal with it and create moments of happiness for myself wherever I can.
I gave up on love that night. I gave up on fated mates and happily ever afters because there is no way in hell I will ever risk feeling the pain of rejection again.
By the Moon Goddess, I swear I will never be so stupid again.
But now Jace is back, and I’m going to have to see him eventually.
And Mika is already aching. She’s confused with anger and desire. A dangerous mix that I hope like hell isn’t going to get me into any trouble.
I place my hand over my chest and bite down hard on my lower lip.
“Hey, it’s going to be ok. Kala is here for her, and I’m here for you,” Kelsey says, pulling me into a hug.
The scent of her hair is like home to me.
She is home to me. I take several deep breaths to calm myself.
Inside me, Mika leans into the hug and takes comfort from Kala.
When I feel more centered, I nod and pull away.
“I don’t know what I’d do with you,” I sigh.
She rolls her eyes. “You’d be running the space station or something if you had no one to hold you back in life,” she laughs. “Come on, we'd better go and do our dutiful bullwhip and welcome our Alpha-to-be back home.”
Letting Kelsey take the lead, I follow behind her, toward the commotion. My stomach begins to churn again, and Mika paces up and down impatiently, agitated.
“Kels,” I grumble, coming to a stop.
“Mm?” She asks, pausing to look over her shoulder.
“You go ahead. I don’t think Mika is ready for this… nor am I,” I sigh.
She smiles sweetly. “I’ll come by later to tell you all the juicy news, “she promises.