Chapter 17 - Mira
One of my favorite things to experience is the fresh, crisp scent and the current of electricity in the air right before a rainstorm.
Sitting on the wooden bench right outside my cottage with a steaming cup of hot chocolate in my hands, I watch the sky as it grows darker and moodier.
It’s beautiful.
And it always evokes deep emotion from me when it’s like this. That static ripples through my veins and into my thoughts. It calms me and makes me realize how small we are in comparison to the sky, yet how connected we are nonetheless.
Two nights ago, Jace spoke to me about some very personal things. I got the feeling that he hadn’t ever told anyone. That means something. The fact that he felt he could share it with me. I just haven’t worked out exactly what it means yet.
Regardless, I want to do something nice for him.
It will be a way of saying thank you for how tender and caring he’s been toward me when I needed him.
And it might be a way to help him heal pieces of himself from the past. Pieces he hasn’t confronted since returning home.
He’s changed so much, and there is a possibility that in that change, he will find a new perspective toward his father, too.
That’s why I contacted Jeremy secretly and invited him to dinner tonight at the cottage.
Of course, I, like the moody sky, have trepidation and static rolling through my body because I’m hoping like hell I’ve done the right thing and that this doesn’t backfire.
I guess the worst-case scenario is that they don’t get along and it's stiff and formal, but at least I would have opened the path for them to communicate outside of pack business or daily tasks.
I sip my hot chocolate, then glance at the time on my phone. Thirty minutes.
Jace will be home any minute now from training, and thirty minutes later, Jeremy arrives. Did I give him enough time to get ready for dinner? Yes, stop worrying. He’s usually ready within fifteen minutes after taking a quick shower and changing his clothes.
My stomach knots a little tighter.
It’s ok. You made a good choice. It’ll be good for them to spend time together away from the other elders, away from everything else.
“The sky is angry this evening,” Jace says, catching me by surprise.
“She’s not angry, she’s expressive,” I smile, standing up to greet him. He slips his arm around my waist and hugs me. Then steals the hot chocolate from right out of my hand and takes a big sip. He grins mischievously, handing it back to me. “It smelled too good to resist,” he chuckles.
“Jace…” I hurry after him into the house, ignoring the butterflies in my chest, so I can tell him his father is coming for dinner.
“Don’t worry. I’m getting in the shower right away. I’ll be ready before they get here,” he smiles, glancing over his shoulder at me.
“Huh?” I blurt out, confused as hell.
Firstly, how did he know? And secondly, who are they?
He turns to look at me, amused by my expression.
“I am the Alpha. And that means there are no secrets in this pack. Someone always knows something,” he laughs.
“You know about dinner?” I sigh, relieved that he isn’t angry.
“I know about dinner. It was a good idea, and I appreciate you doing this for me,” he says, cupping his hand below my chin to tilt my head up. “Thank you, Mira,” he says gently.
He turns away, heading for the shower. “By the way,” he calls out from the other room. “Miles is coming too.”
“What?!” I blurt out, storming into the room. He’s already half undressed, and I have come to a stammering halt, tripping over my feet, my words, and my thoughts as my eyes do their best not to devour every inch of him like a pervert.
“What, what?” he laughs.
“Why would you invite Miles?” I ask, looking everywhere else but at him.
He carries on stripping his clothes off as though there is zero awkwardness in the room, despite my cheeks glowing poker hot red.
“I assume you invited my father because you figured we might need to work on the past, and how we’ve drifted apart. Rekindle that old connection. Get to know my family again… all that?”
“Well…yes…” I agree, no longer even trying to avoid staring at his gorgeous, divine nakedness.
“Well… I invited Miles for the same reason,” he grins, then spins away and walks into the bathroom before I can say another word.
In silence and disbelief, I stand in the bedroom with my mouth gaping open and my thoughts in a jumble.
I want to argue with Jace, but I can’t. Miles and I are family, and we drifted apart years and years ago.
Pretty much when my parents died. Which means he’s ever felt like a brother to me.
He lived a life that was so different from mine, his status ranking him far above me and providing him with luxuries I couldn’t even dream of.
But I don’t have anything to confront him about. Nothing to say to him. There is no relationship to heal.
Brother. Family.
Mika argues wordlessly with me, and I roll my eyes.
Fine, yes, brother. But what does that even mean? I huff back at her.
Regardless. This is happening whether I’m ready for it or not, and the dinner has just gotten times more awkward. And I'd better call in and order another pizza. A whole extra wolf at our table, especially one as hungry as Miles, there has to be enough food.
Jace, Jeremy, Miles, and I sit around the little wooden dinner table near the glass patio doors in my cozy cottage.
Mostly, we’re silent, and the awkwardness levels are extremely high.
“Great pizza,” Miles grins, glancing at Jace and then me.
“Good choice of toppings,” Jeremy adds, clearly grasping at absolutely anything to talk about.
The absurdity of this tension makes me giggle, and I shake my head. I’m the hostess. I need to at least try to improve this situation.
“How are things going at the pack house, Jeremy? I haven’t been around there much lately with new training programs I’m doing at the lab,” I ask cheerfully.
Jeremy perks up.
“Oh, it’s going great. Better than it has in a long time, actually,” he nods, taking another bite of pizza.
“Better? Why, what’s happening?” Jace asks, confused by his father’s uplifting tone.
Jeremy looks at his son in confusion, then chuckles. He knots his brows as though the answer is obvious. “You are happening, Jace,” he laughs.
Miles raises his brows and pulls his mouth down at the corners; his expression silently shows surprise and intense curiosity for whatever is about to happen. I think my face looks identical.
Eagerly interested.
“Me?” Jace snorts, “How?”
Jeremy laughs again. “Son, you’re making big changes in the pack. Obviously, you’re aware of the fact that it would impact things on every level?”
“Yes, uh, I know that. I just…”
“I’m proud of you,” Jeremy says casually. His words were as calm as if he were commenting on the weather.
“Pr…”
Jace can’t even find his voice. He’s staring at his father in shock.
Jeremy looks up at Jace and then glances at my face and Miles. We’re all staring at him as though he’s just given away a state secret.
Jeremy’s eyes go wide, and he stumbles over his thoughts for a second. Does he realize this is the first time he’s ever said anything like that to his son?
Jeremy scoffs, “Um, I mean, look…” he sighs, scrunching his nose as a sign of his emotional discomfort.
“Yes, I’m proud of you, Jace. I’m sorry I didn’t say it before.
I’m a stubborn old man, you know. Have always been stubborn.
That’s never going to change. But here’s the thing.
You came back from Black Ops, and you got to work right away.
You made changes in this pack that others wouldn’t dare to even try because of the old ways and how people can be so set in stone.
"Sure, I was shocked at first. It was unheard of for Omegas to become hunters. To let them train and all that. But in all my years, in all my life, I have never seen the pack functioning as smoothly as it is right now. Those women are proud. They are proud to be a bigger part of things, and now we have more hands to attend to the work. Things are running better than they ever have…and… I’m proud of the man you’ve become. ”
For a moment, the dinner table is absolutely silent.
My heart is beating so hard I imagine everyone can hear it.
Jace’s face slowly breaks into a smile, and he lets out a breath of relief.
“Thanks, Dad. That means a lot to me,” he says. He speaks as though his heart is flooded with emotion, but he’s keeping himself in control. Managing them.
Jeremy smiles and nods once in acknowledgment. No emotional outburst, no over-the-top drama. Just two men who have somehow managed to ease away years of distance between them in the space of a few minutes and one conversation.
I grin, picking up another slice of pizza and trying to hide how happy I am because now I’m the one ready to let my emotions get the better of me.
Miles glances at me and winks.
“I’m glad to hear that the changes aren’t being met with as much animosity as I was expecting. I thought everyone would be pushing against them,” Jace remarks.
“No, they’re being received well, Lexus and I are very impressed and really…
the results speak for themselves. But Jace, not everyone is happy about it.
I don’t think I have to mention which elder is speaking against you, but along with him, there are a few pack members who are bitter.
Just watch your back. Some people take longer to adjust to change than others. ”
“I understand,” Jace nods. “I hope that in time they see the good I’m trying to bring about.”
The rest of dinner is a lot more talkative and relaxed.
We discuss the hunt and how it went. We talk about the future in excited tones.
And when the pizza is finished, I stand to gather the boxes, and Jace and Jeremy are still deep in conversation about things I think they’ve wanted to share with each other for years.
For the first time, they are speaking as friends instead of what they were before.
Miles follows me to the kitchen, carrying the dinner plates.
As I fold the empty pizza boxes so they can fit in my recycling bin, Miles silently rinses the plates. The awkwardness is back, but this time it’s my turn. I let out a frustrated huff, trying to ease off some of the tension.
Miles turns toward me and bites the inside of his cheek.
“I didn’t want to come,” he blurts out.
I pause, stunned that he would be so brutally honest. His words cut into me. They hurt. My brows furrow, and I pull my mouth tight.
“That’s a nasty thing to say, Miles. I know we aren’t close, but you didn’t have to be so harsh in your honesty,” I snap, angry with him.
Maybe in the past, I would have turned silently away, thinking how it isn’t worth creating drama to let someone know that they’ve hurt me.
But not anymore. I’ve been learning about myself, about what is good for me.
And it’s not good for me to let people say or do whatever they want to me while I sit silently and let it happen.
Miles looks horrified. His eyes shoot wide, and his mouth drops open. “No, wait, Mira, that’s not…I meant…. I didn’t mean…”
With my arms folded across my chest, I glare at him. Challenging him.
“What exactly did you mean, Miles?” I ask, my gaze piercing into him.
He chuckles nervously and pushes his hand through his dark brown hair.
“I meant that I was embarrassed to come to your home and ….I don’t feel that I deserve your hospitality or kindness after what I did to you in the past.”
He is struggling to look at me, and his eyes keep darting around the kitchen.
He lets out a heavy breath and closes his eyes for a moment while I wait, understanding that there is more he wants to say, and it clearly isn’t easy for him.
At the same time, I’m riveted to his words. Eager to hear what he means.
“When we were little, after Mom and Dad died, I abandoned you. I got given this amazing life with all these perks because I was a Beta wolf, and I just sort of…left you and Aunt Rayanna to live your own lives,” he sighs.
“You were a kid, Miles. You didn’t know better,” I say gently.
“But I did. Of course I did. You are my family. And then, worse, when you were getting bullied, I did nothing. Nothing. Sometimes I even saw it happening, and I just kept walking or pretended I didn’t notice.
Even if you weren’t my sister, I should have stopped them. I just thought…” he swallows hard.
“You thought that if you helped me, they would start treating you the same, and you didn’t want to risk it,” I say, fully understanding his fear as a kid.
He nods, embarrassed.
“I’m so sorry, Mira. I still carry that guilt. I always will.”
I sigh, tilting my head to the side.
I’ve never wanted or expected anything from Miles, but him admitting these things means more to me than he might know. Or even than I might know.
“Ok, so what are you going to do about it?” I ask bluntly.
He knots his brows in confusion.
“Do?”
“Yes,” I laugh. “You feel bad. You have guilt. So fix it,” I smile.
“Mira, it’s not so easy to…”
“Bull swat. You did me wrong in the past. Fine. It’s over.
We can leave that in the past and let it be.
But now you have a chance to make things right.
It’s not my job to chase you and beg you to want to be my brother.
It’s up to you to put in the effort, Miles.
Call me. Stop by and visit. Invite me for dinner.
Come here for dinner. I don’t care how… just put in the effort. ”
Miles chuckles, smiling so wide that dimples form on his cheeks, and for a second, he looks like a kid. That confused little boy who lost his parents and did his best to navigate the world without them.
Suddenly, he strides across my small kitchen and pulls me into a hug.
“I will, Mira. I definitely will do all of those things,” he says, his head buried against my hair as he holds me tight.
My heart swells with happiness. I planned to do something sweet for Jace tonight, to help him heal old wounds with his father. I never knew I’d be receiving the same gift.