Chapter 12 - Owen
After the meeting was over, I took a run in the forest to try to clear my head.
The others were going to work on damage control.
Having two Omegas, especially ones that had been trusted with the children, developing this violence would only cause more suspicion within the pack.
With me being… well, me, it was decided that I wouldn’t be helpful.
The forest was quiet today. The sky was overcast but not dark, just that pale gray that stopped the sun from being blinding. I trotted through the trees, keeping close to the edge as I made my way around the town.
After talking to the others about Jasmine and explaining exactly what happened, I felt…lighter. And heavier at the same time.
This hatred that I’d kept close, the insistence on trying to deny what I knew was true by lashing out at Jasmine, was like a heavy chain that had wrapped around me. Every link had been forged carefully to keep me caged, and now I wasn’t sure if I was able to break free.
My father had died from a meth overdose. He started using while in jail because Jasmine’s grandmother accused him of attacking her. He always swore the accusations weren’t true, and I’d tried to believe him. I molded my actions as though I did, as though it wasn’t his fault that it all happened.
And if that wasn’t his fault, it wasn’t his fault the way he screamed, berated, and threatened to beat me when I told him that Jasmine was my mate.
Over the years, I’d hardened that shell around me. Turned it into a holding pattern, because that was more comfortable than really examining myself.
Maybe I would never trust her, or any other omega.
I doubted whether her ancestors were as innocent as the story had turned recently.
But I had blinded myself, on purpose. It didn’t just hurt Jasmine; it hurt my teamwork with the other alphas, it hurt the pack, and it hurt omegas in other packs, too.
I was part of the violence. My hatred had encouraged hatred from others.
So I needed to talk to Jasmine. Maybe if I could explain everything, things could start to change. They were right. It was unlikely that her heat would pass fully if we didn’t all have sex with her, and I wanted to get to a better place before that happened.
I found her at the infirmary, making a pot of coffee for all the doctors and nurses. The scent of herbs filled the air, and I glanced at a steeping teapot.
“Hi,” I said awkwardly as I stepped up to her. “Are the herbs helping?”
Her shoulders hunched inward. “They seem to be a little. They’ve calmed down and aren’t trying to break from their restraints. But it also might be the drugs the doctors gave them.”
“Right. Right. I, uh…I wanted to talk to you?” The word somehow turned into a question at the end.
“That’s nice.” She turned toward me fully. “I’m not going to talk to you.”
I gaped after her as she strode from the infirmary.
I awkwardly stood there, trying to figure out what to do next.
I’d been so sure that she would listen. That we could go for a walk or head back home or something.
Instead, she’d blankly shut me down. I wasn’t sure how I was supposed to respond to that.
“Alpha?” one of the doctors approached me. “Are you here for an update on the omegas?”
“No. No, I was looking for Jasmine,” I said, attempting and failing to hide the bewilderment in my voice.
The doctor frowned. “Alpha, I’m not sure that she should be here. This is a clinic, and it upsets people to see omegas hanging around.”
“It upsets people to see pack members coming to the infirmary, where anyone who needs medical attention is supposed to come?” I asked, my voice hardening. “Is that what you’re saying?”
“That’s not…I didn’t mean…I apologize.” The doctor dropped his head. “Forgive me.”
With a huff, I headed out the door. This was the attitude I’d encouraged, after all.
Could I really berate the doctor when that was the same thing I’d have done just a few weeks ago?
I sniffed the air deeply, catching Jasmine’s scent.
I followed. She was heading toward the trailer park, and I jogged to catch up with her.
I hadn’t gone far before I spied her, in the center of a ring of warriors, who loomed over her, their postures threatening.
Snippets of words drifted to me.
“Your fault.”
“Omega curse.”
“Fucking bitch.”
I didn’t bother to hear anything else. I shoved the warriors aside and snarled at them as I wrapped an arm around her waist. Jasmine jumped, then tensed. But she didn’t pull away.
“Alpha Owen,” one of them said.
I shut him up with a single glare. “Consider yourselves lucky that I’m more concerned with getting my mate away from you than punishing you the way you deserve.”
They were silent as I pulled Jasmine away. We walked swiftly. I would have slowed my pace for her, but she pushed hard, as though she was trying to escape me. We were closer to her old trailer than the house, so we went there. Maybe if we could just have a little bit of privacy to talk…
Jasmine tensed when I suggested it, but she nodded.
We went to her old trailer, and surprise rippled through me as soon as I stepped inside.
This place was…not worth living in. The floor sagged beneath our feet, and the furniture she’d left behind was in such bad shape that it was no wonder why nobody thought to take it.
“Is this—” I started, but she whirled on me.
“I don’t need your help.”
I focused on her again. “Pardon?”
“You with those warriors. I only played along because I didn’t want to cause trouble when the pack needs unity. But I don’t need your help. You’re a bigger asshole than any of them could be, so just leave me alone!” Jasmine’s hands clenched as she glared at me.
It was so unlike her that my jaw tightened. “That isn’t…what should I have done, just stood by?”
“You should have not been an asshole. A leopard doesn’t change its spots, and you have only been a bully ever since we were kids.
” She sucked in a deep breath and jutted out her chin at me.
“Let’s just agree that when my heat is in full force, we’ll fuck and then ignore each other.
That’s the best way. We don’t talk, we don’t fight, we just do what is necessary and stop causing trouble for the others. ”
I’d never heard her say fuck before. It stirred me, making me harden. My gaze dropped to her lips. Were they always so red and plump? “Would it change your mind if I told you I’m here to apologize?”
“No.”
“What if I explained why—”
“No! It’s not going to change anything.” She tapped her toes, fidgeting as she folded her arms, dropped them, then pushed her hair back from her face. Her mouth tightened, trembled, relaxed, then tightened again.
It didn’t take long for me to figure out what was going on. My cock pressed tightly against my jeans as her scent registered in a new way. I tried to breathe through my mouth, but it was no good.
“Your heat has come back,” I murmured.
Jasmine closed her eyes. She sucked in a breath to the count of five, then released it. “Yes.”
“You’re in pain.”
“Yes.”
I stepped toward the door. “Then let’s go back to the house. I’ll call the others and—”
“No.”
I stopped, searching her face. My heart beat hard, the desire making my insides shake. Heat built beneath my skin, and my loins grew tighter every moment. It made it difficult to think clearly, but I didn’t want to hurt her more than I already had. “What do you want?”
Jasmine bit her lip. “I told you. I think that sex is the one thing we won’t have to fake. And if that’s something we can have, even if it’s just when I’m in heat, then it’s something that we can be unified by. So…please help me.”
Her voice grew smaller, like she expected me to laugh at her. Instead, I stepped forward. My hands itched with the desire to touch her, but I made sure to move slowly. I took her hand, watching carefully. Her expression didn’t change.
“I do want to apologize,” I told her, reminding myself of the reason I’d chased after her in the first place.
“Then I suppose we’ll have to make time to talk through it. I just am in no condition to hear it right now,” she admitted.
Alright. She needed this pain to go away, and I needed something to show that I was genuine. “Is there still a bed here?”
She nodded and led me down the narrow hall. The bed was a creaky old frame and a lumpy mattress, bare and looking old and a little gross. But Jasmine pulled a pillow and blanket from the closet and put it down. When I looked at her questioningly, she shrugged.
“I wanted to make sure I’d have something here if I ever had to sneak away in the middle of the night.”
“Ah. I see.” I stepped closer, resting my hands on her hips. Though my body kept telling me to stop thinking, I wasn’t so interested in being a mindless beast. I moved slowly as I undid the button on her jeans. “How far do you want this to go?”
“Not all the way. Just enough to alleviate the pain,” she answered, cheeks flushed. Her hands fluttered, and I caught them between mine, then pressed a kiss to her palms.
The warmth of her so close to me calmed me. I kissed her wrist and pressed her hand to my cheek as I gazed down at her. “Are you sure?”
Tension drained from her shoulders as she searched my face. “I am. Are you?”
I nodded and guided her back onto the bed. “I’m sure. It’s an instinctual drive, and even if it weren’t, I agree with you. I think this is the best chance we have at finding any sort of common ground.”
She started to shove her pants off, and I stopped her.
Though we were both impatient, I wanted to take this slowly.
I wanted to give us both time to change our minds.
Jasmine watched me, her gaze guarded, and yet when she touched me, there was trust in it.
It made me shiver with anticipation as I pulled her pants down and eased her back onto the bed.
Her thick thighs pressed together, the hem of her shirt combining with her apron belly to hide her sex from me as she curled forward. She was doing it deliberately, and I had to remind myself that her caution was not unwarranted.
“Take off your shirt,” she breathed.
Heat stirred through my blood, and I bit back a groan.
Maybe it wasn’t caution, after all. Maybe it was something else.
I tugged my shirt off, quicker and rougher than I’d undressed her.
Jasmine let out a shaky breath as she reached for me, her fingers splaying against my skin.
I closed my eyes, releasing all the air from my lungs in one great woosh.
It felt like something had finally been released in me that I had been holding on to all my life.
She explored my abdomen and chest, fingers touching lightly at first, then with more confidence.
I savored the feeling, letting my own tension melt away.
I couldn’t tell her that I’d known she was my mate from childhood now.
It would only complicate matters. But oh, having her touch me was like rain after a drought.
“Owen?”
I opened my eyes again and looked down at her.
She searched my gaze, as though deciding something.
Whatever she saw must have been acceptable to her, because she reached for my hand and pulled me onto the bed next to her.
We arranged ourselves on the narrow mattress, but there wasn’t much room.
Jasmine shuffled backward and nearly fell off.
I caught her and pulled her closer. “Hey. You’re the one who asked for this. Why are you running away?” I teased.
Jasmine giggled. Her hands smoothed over my ribs and sides, then moved up my back.
I ran my own hands down her back, wishing I’d had the foresight to remove her shirt.
Too late for that now. It would mean parting again, and I didn’t want to do that.
Her heavy breasts pressed into me, and I gripped her soft thigh to pull it up over my hip.
Her hands tightened on me, and I pushed my hand between our bodies. As I cupped her sex, the sweet perfume of her arousal filled the air. She rocked against me, pressing the back of my hand into my cock, and then she gasped.
“Oh,” she breathed.
“Oh?” I repeated.
One of her hands moved to cup me through my jeans. “You’re very hard. Killian and Renz were both hard when they were touching me, but…” She rolled her hand against me, making me shudder. “I’m not sure fingers are going to be enough now.”
“I’ll try my best.”
I slid my fingers through her soaked folds, pleased at how wet she was.
I explored her slowly, watching her face as her eyes shifted to half-mast, her mouth dropping open.
Her clit was already hard and swollen. I touched it lightly, and she jerked her hips, seeking more.
I obliged, rolling the sensitive flesh between my fingers.
She shuddered against me, whimpering as she pressed closer.
Her hands roamed over me, exploring every inch of me as I circled her clit.
She was soon whining in wordless need, her hips rocking repeatedly.
I pushed two fingers into her and ground the heel of my palm against her, but she only made a frustrated noise.
“Not enough,” she panted. “Need more.”
I pulled my hand free and rolled her to her back.
I pinned her in place, spreading her legs wide around my hips.
Jasmine let out a breathless laugh as she grabbed me and yanked my mouth to hers.
She tasted sweet, like a mouthful of fresh spring water.
I groaned into her, fucking her with my fingers.
But she kept writhing, kept jerking like she needed more.
I broke from her mouth reluctantly and kissed down her front, shoving her shirt out of the way so I could lick first one taut nipple, then the other.
“Owen,” she panted. “What…what are you doing?”
I continued down my path. “I’m going to take the pain away, Jasmine.”
I moved back, half-falling off the edge of the bed as I got into position. I lifted her legs over my shoulders and kissed the inner crease where her hip met her thigh. Jasmine’s eyes were bright as she lifted herself to look down at me.
“Oh,” she breathed. “You’re going to…”
My mouth watered with the need to taste her, but there was something in her eyes. I forced myself to stop and looked up at her. “I’ll stop. We can go back to the others. What do you want me to do?”
She held her breath. And I held mine, too, waiting for her answer.