Chapter 20 - Jasmine
Jace and I rolled to our sides, getting into a more relaxed position so we could wait out his knot.
I reached down to feel the place we were joined, smiling when my fingers brushed the proof of our compatibility.
I was afraid that the heat was the only reason why the four of us had enjoyed sex so much, but this experiment just went to show our physical connection ran deeper than that.
My body ached in a pleasant way, muscles loose and tired from it all. I giggled as I rested my head on Jace’s arm. “So much for it not being a marathon again.”
Jace cupped my buttocks while Renz, Owen, and Killian moved around the room, cleaning up. It was nice not to have to worry about that.
“In the morning, we’ll check to see how sore you are. After four knots like that, I just hope you aren’t bruised.”
“I don’t feel bruised.” I touched the space where we were still connected again. “You forget that female wolves are built to take knots, just like you males are meant to give them. Though after feeling the knot, I understand why some people like fisting.”
Jace lifted an eyebrow. “How do you know about fisting?”
I smirked at him. “I may have been a virgin, but I read books.”
He chuckled and pulled me closer. I let my eyes drift shut. Jace stroked my hair, then gasped with pain. He jerked away from me, and my eyes snapped open. Jace’s eyes were wide, his mouth hanging open. A horrible gash was slashed across his throat.
I screamed, jerking back. I fell off the bed onto the hard floor. It shook beneath me, and I screamed again. Killian and Renz lay nearby, their hands wrapped against each other’s throats. Owen was half-collapsed into a chair, his skin white as bone with a grisly pool of blood beneath him.
The smell of smoke filled the air. I stumbled to my feet and raced to the window. Outside, the town was in flames. And bodies. So many bodies—
“Jasmine!” someone cried.
My body jerked. I couldn’t look back, though more voices called me now. I couldn’t turn, couldn’t bear to see my husbands dead again.
“Jasmine, wake up!”
“Come back to us!”
I gasped. Something yanked inside of me, and then suddenly I was lying on my bed. My body was twisted up in the blankets, shivering, covered in sweat. My four mates pressed around me, their eyes worried. And alive. Very alive and very whole.
“Give her space,” Jace said, pushing slightly.
All of them were dressed, while I was still naked. I pressed trembling hands to each of them, and slowly I understood what had happened. How long had I been caught up in the trance?
“You were having a nightmare,” Killian said gently.
I shook my head, fighting back a swell of nausea. “It was a vision of the future.”
“A vision?” Renz repeated.
“Yes. I’ve had them before, but never that intense.” I shuddered again, pulling the blankets over my body. I was just so cold!
“What do you mean?” Owen asked.
With a sinking heart, I turned toward him. “Yes. I have some psychic abilities.”
“Why didn’t you tell us?” Hurt filled his eyes.
Jace put a hand on my shoulder. “She told me, close to the wedding. I advised her to keep it quiet at the time, considering…well, everything. With everything else happening, I got so distracted I forgot about it.”
I leaned against the headboard, wincing. “I didn’t think about it again. I don’t have them often, and that’s the strongest vision I ever saw.”
“What did you see?” Killian asked.
Owen shook his head. “Let’s let her get dressed first.”
Renz went to my wardrobe and picked out clothes, checking with me that they were what I wanted before bringing them over. I dressed quickly, though I wished I could shower first. But the vision was still strong behind my eyes. We needed to figure out how to avoid that future.
After I’d dressed, we all sat on the bed again, and I explained what I had seen. I rubbed my forehead, and my stomach knotted. “I was at the center of it. All those dead pack members, and I was the only one alive. This house was the only one not on fire.”
“That sounds terrifying,” Renz murmured.
Jace gently rubbed circles on my back while Owen stroked his thumb over my knuckles. Killian rubbed the back of his neck, his expression dark.
“Somehow it’s my fault. I’m the reason all this chaos is happening.
The Goddess must have wanted me tamed somehow, but it’s not working.
” Tears pricked my eyes. I wasn’t doing enough.
There had to be something I should do, but I didn’t know what it was.
Maybe it was the hugging ritual Penny told me about.
Maybe I needed to try harder to get the light that had cleansed Burgess.
“It’s not your fault,” Jace told me. “None of us knows exactly what is happening. You can’t blame yourself when all of us are a part of this.”
At this, Owen let out a tight breath. “Honestly, if anyone is to blame, it’s us. We are the ones who set the treatment of omegas in the pack.”
“Or,” Killian growled, narrowing his eyes at me, “or this is all one of your omega plots. What else haven’t you told us, huh? What else are you planning behind our backs?”
I drew back, stunned. “Killian?”
The others started to protest, but Killian didn’t seem to hear. He roared suddenly, lunging toward me. Owen dragged me off the bed, and we fell with a crash to the floor as Jace and Renz threw themselves in front of Killian. He clawed at them, snarling and kicking as he tried to get at me.
Jace rolled to his feet and pounced on him. Between the three of them, they wrestled Killian down on the bed, twisting his arms behind his back. I stared at Killian, heart in my throat as his eyes turned jet black.
He’d been right. He was afraid the dark energy was starting to affect him, and now…now, it’d taken him entirely.
“Killian,” I breathed, reaching toward his face.
He snapped at my fingers and nearly tore away from the others.
“Get out of the room,” Jace grunted. “Lock yourself in the bathroom and call our seconds. Go. We’ll handle this.”
I grabbed my phone off my nightstand and hurried into the bathroom, where I locked the door.
After I called the seconds, I sank to the floor, listening to the noise from the bedroom.
My vision was coming true. Killian had been taken by the darkness because of me.
I should have figured out how to stop this already.
This was my fault.
And I was going to lose them all, one by one.
***
Killian was locked away. The Burgess alphas had brought over the strait jackets they had used on their possessed pack members and had a long discussion with Jace, Owen, and Renz, but I wasn’t part of it. They had left Penny at home, insisting that they weren’t going to risk her coming.
I kept researching, reading far and wide, but even though I kept finding hints about the old omega culture, I couldn’t figure it out.
The feeling of being useless only grew worse and worse.
The most I could do was keep working in my garden, because the herb mixtures I made at least seemed to soothe Killian.
After he was taken by the darkness, there was a strong influx of others as well. Violent acts kept popping up through the pack, and most of them were found to be possessed and locked away.
Eventually, I couldn’t take it anymore and called Penny, asking to meet up. She didn’t want to come to Tyrell—not that I blamed her—so we decided to meet up in the city. It took some convincing for Renz, Owen, and Jace to be comfortable with the idea, especially with me going alone.
“There haven’t been any reports of the darkness in neutral territory except the grasslands,” I pointed out.
“Yeah, but we can’t take the time to go with you,” Jace grumbled. “And I don’t like the idea of you going alone.”
I sighed. “I know what you mean. I don’t really like the idea of going alone, either, but I’m sure that it will be fine. Honestly, it sucks, but I think I could be more open with Penny without you guys there.”
Owen nodded. “No, I understand. When we’re nearby, you want to word things in a way that won’t make us feel protective. Because you still blame yourself.”
When did he start knowing me so well? I managed a small smile, nodding once.
It was strange to be so open about this.
Part of me felt like I should lie, pretend that their reassurances were enough.
The truth was, though, they were alphas.
They were used to this sort of responsibility and the pressure that went with it.
And they would say I wasn’t to blame and try to make me feel better, regardless of the situation.
I needed someone outside of the pack. I needed someone who had gone through the same thing I was going through now.
“Take my car,” Jace said, giving me the keys. “And let us know how it goes, okay?”
***
“… and that’s how it is,” I said to Penny.
We were sitting in a café, two cups of untouched coffee between us.
I leaned my elbows on the table, hunching over.
“I’m sure that this is getting worse because of me.
I keep thinking, maybe if I weren’t there, then it would get better. The darkness would leave.”
Penny reached across the table and squeezed my hand. “The Goddess wouldn’t have chosen you to be their wife if you needed to leave to defeat the darkness.”
I winced. “I suppose.”
“I know how tempting it is to think that if you run away, everything will be fixed. But that’s not how it works. You have to face this. That vision isn’t the be-all, end-all. It was a warning, yes, but remember that the omegas who came before us left spells in the land to warn us of the darkness.”
“But if I were doing my job, I would have found the answers already.”
Penny shook her head. “You can’t think of it that way. The Goddess placed you with your alphas for a reason. I don’t know why she doesn’t give us answers, but she likes for us to figure things out on our own. What I do know is that we can’t give in to despair. That’s what the darkness wants.”
***
After Penny left, I headed back to the car, only to find Owen there. I slowed to a stop at the sight of him. “Did you follow me?”
He nodded.
I rubbed my aching forehead. All that talk about me going on my own, and them saying that they couldn’t leave the pack business, and Owen had followed me anyway. Was it because he was worried about me, or because he, too, blamed me?
After what we had been through, I didn’t want to assume the worst of him.
“Let’s hear it,” I said, leaning against the car beside him.
“I knew that you blamed yourself, but I didn’t realize that you blamed yourself as much as you apparently do,” Owen said softly.
I wrapped my arms around my middle. “And now that you have heard it? Now that you know, I have been considering running away.”
Owen reached for my hand, and I braced myself. He took my hand gently and rubbed his thumb over my knuckles. “I’ve thought about it, too.”
“You…what?”
He gave me a small smile. “I didn’t always want to be an alpha, and even these days, I feel like I’m not good enough. I’ve done some shitty things and made some terrible mistakes. There are plenty of times when I’ve felt like the pack and the other alphas would be better without me.”
I turned my palm to his and squeezed his hand. Just a few weeks ago, he wouldn’t have opened up to me like this. “I thought I was the only one who felt that way.”
Owen shook his head. “You are doing enough, Jasmine. We wouldn’t be where we are without you. I don’t think I’d have so much hope if you weren’t here.”
My heart swelled. Warmth spread through me, and I smiled at him. He smiled back, and I felt a sweep of determination through me. I wasn’t going to lose them to this darkness. I would figure this out, somehow.
I loved them too much to give up now.