Chapter 15
Chapter Fifteen
Adelaide
I yawned, my jaw cracking, as I gently set a sleeping Axel in his crib, being extra careful not to wake him up. River was currently working to shut down the party so that people around here could actually catch some sleep—people like me. I was sleeping more and more lately, the pregnancy slowly but surely draining my energy as the baby grew.
I pressed two of my fingers to my lips before I pressed them to Axel’s forehead. His little nose scrunched up, and at that moment, he looked exactly like River, even if Axel wasn’t biologically his. I smiled to myself at the thought of my man.
He was so damn good to me. I didn’t know what I’d done to deserve him, but I’d never take him for granted.
He had allowed Joey to come to visit me, all while knowing my history with him, and instead of being all territorial and possessive like Tristan had always been, River invited him here to see me, and he just trusted solely in the fact that I wouldn’t fuck around on him.
He’d let Joey and I have our moment together, and there had been nothing but understanding in his eyes when I’d finally come back to him. He really did understand that I would never be able to let Joey go, and he was okay with that.
And Joey… fuck. He had changed so much—changed for me . He wanted to be better for me, and I loved him so much for that. We may not be together, but he was trying his damnest to prove to me that he was worthy of remaining a part of my life.
It was why he always reminded me to keep him with me.
“What’s got you smiling like that?” River quietly asked as he stepped into our room, softly shutting the door behind him.
I turned to look at him. “You,” I honestly answered as he strode toward me.
He quirked an eyebrow at me. God, he was so perfect. How was it possible that a man so rugged could still be so fucking gorgeous? “Me?” he asked as he drew me into his muscular arms.
I wrapped my arms around his neck. “You,” I repeated, nodding my head as I smiled up at him. The corners of his lips twitched with a smile of his own. “You’re incredibly good to me, River,” I told him honestly. “I don’t deserve you, not after all of the shit that I’ve done in my life.” I brushed my fingers over the stubble on his jaw, letting it tickle my fingertips. “Thank you for staying with me.”
Reaching up, he gently cupped my jaw. “Always had a soft spot for you, darlin’,” he huskily confessed. “You stole the breath from my lungs the moment you aimed those beautiful, brown eyes at me.” I swallowed thickly. “I had a soft spot for you, even when Tristan dragged you to the clubhouse from Joey’s. You were so fucking angry at the world, yet I thought you were the most breathtaking fighter I’d ever laid my eyes on. You didn’t give up. Didn’t give in to him.”
“How come you never made a move before?” I asked him, honestly curious. If he had, it might have saved me so much heartache. I might have been able to save Tristan from hurting so much, too.
“I had to wait for the right time, darlin’. I needed you to come to me first.” I frowned. He leaned down and lightly brushed his lips over mine. “I knew the moment you came to me first, Tristan would be the least of your concerns. Joey would be, too. Because I knew when I got a taste of you, it wasn’t going to be enough. I was going to want you a hell of a lot more afterward. I was going to want you to be mine in every way possible.”
My heart warmed at his words. “I wish I had made the decision a hell of a lot sooner,” I whispered. We’d lost so much time because of me.
River’s lips tipped up at the corners the slightest bit. I bit my lip at the sight of his beautiful smile lighting up his features. “Everything happens on its own time, and I knew that as long as I stayed patient and waited for you, I would have you here with me where you’ve always belonged.”
Then, River claimed my lips in a soft, slow kiss. A quiet moan crawled up my throat as I pressed myself harder against him, allowing him to drag me over to the bed. He quickly yanked my shirt over my head, and he placed hot, open-mouthed kisses all over my skin until he reached the edge of my black bra. With skillful fingers, he undid the clasp and tossed it somewhere across the room.
I gasped softly, digging my fingers into his hair as he let his lips meet mine again as he eased my body back on the bed, his strong, muscular body coming down with me.
I groaned in protest when Axel’s crying reached my ears, dragging me from my peaceful sleep. I blinked at the alarm clock beside me, only to see that it was just 3:02 in the morning. “I’ve got him,” River whispered before he leaned over to press a kiss to my forehead. He slid out of bed and yanked on a pair of sweats.
I watched him through sleepy eyes as he strode over to the crib and picked Axel up, cradling him in his arms as he strode out of our room.
If he was like this with his nephew, my heart was going to melt at my feet to see him with his very own kid. I knew River was going to shoot Red down that day, and I was so glad that I stepped in. I knew River would never deny me something that big.
Turned out, it was one of the best decisions I made. Not only was Axel now going to have a warm and loving family, but River had a piece of his brother that would never be tainted by the shit that occurred in their past. And I think he needed that more than he realized.
Our baby suddenly made its appearance by creating a small flutter in my belly. My eyes widened in shock as I stared down at my stomach, unable to believe it. I was barely fifteen weeks now. This wasn’t possible. At least, all my research told me it shouldn’t be.
But then again, the doctor had told me that it may very well be possible that I feel the baby move earlier than usual since I was so small to begin with when I got pregnant.
Another flutter drew my attention back to my belly. It was unmistakable. Before long, I would actually be able to feel the baby kicking and hitting my belly.
Tears of joy trickled down my cheeks as I quickly flicked on the lamp on my side of the bed and placed my hands on my very slightly rounded belly, laughing softly. I sniffled as River stepped back into the room, carrying Axel who was greedily drinking from his bottle.
“Woah, darlin’, what’s wrong?” River demanded to know as he quickly strode over to me.
“The baby moved,” I told him with a smile. “It was like a flutter, kind of like when I was a little girl, and I would get butterflies in my belly, but the baby is definitely active,” I told him. “I’ll be feeling the baby kick in no time.”
River grinned—an actual full-on smile that melted my heart and soul—and he sat beside me on the bed as he transferred Axel to one arm, adjusting the bottle so it rested against his chest. With his free hand, he rested his hand between mine where I was still cradling my small belly.
“Fuck, I can’t wait until I can feel our baby move,” he admitted. “I never imagined myself as a dad before you, darlin’.” He lifted his head, letting those blue eyes that I loved so much meet mine.
“You do incredibly well with Axel,” I noted.
“Not even going to lie, darlin’, I probably never would have taken care of him had you not been here to give me the push that I needed.” I knew that whether he realized it or not though. “I never wanted kids until I found your ultrasound pictures. That day, I suddenly realized that with you, I wanted it all.”
I leaned my head on his shoulder tiredly. “I still don’t understand how you didn’t lose your shit when you found out,” I told him. Any normal man would have flipped the fuck out.
River lightly shrugged since my head was on his shoulder. “I told you, Adelaide. I’m not Tristan or Joey. I could never be angry with you like that, and if I ever got that angry, I would walk away and calm down before I ever exploded at you like they’ve done in the past. I made a promise to myself that I would be better than them for you. I’ll never raise my voice at you, and I’ll do my damnest to always be reasonable with you.”
“Guess that explains why you didn’t lose your shit about the garage either,” I commented.
He released a quiet laugh. “Honestly, darlin’, I was more worried about you and what was going on in that pretty little head of yours than I was about some money I may have had to spend to fix some damages you may have caused. For you to lose your shit like that, I knew something had happened, knew you were hurting. I just wanted to help you.”
Oh, my heart . “I’m surprised Tristan didn’t at least leave here sporting a black eye,” I said quietly.
River snorted as he shook his head, clenching his jaw before he forced it to relax. “Trust me, darlin’, I wanted to do more than black his eye, but I restrained myself from hitting him at all. You were hurting enough, and I knew hitting him would only hurt you more.” Why in the hell was River so fucking perfect ? “Instead, I threatened to put a bullet through his skull if he ever made you that upset again.”
I tensed, hating that I was still protective of Tristan after everything that had happened between us. But it was my fault that he was hurting this much, why he felt the need to come to me in the kitchen in the first place. River sighed softly as he looked down at me, understanding in his gaze.
“I know that you don’t ever want anything to happen to him, darlin’. I hate it, but I understand it.” I swallowed thickly. “Tristan has never tried with you, so it bugs the fuck out of me that you’re so protective of him.” I frowned. “But if someone ever does something to hurt you again, emotionally or physically, I won’t be held back, no matter how much they mean to you. And if Tristan ever makes you that upset again, he may not live to see the light of another day,” he warned me, his blue eyes flashing dangerously. “You’ve been hurt enough.”
“River, you know that I’ve got history with him—” I started, feeling a little panicky, but he cut me off.
River shook his head, clenching his jaw. “Adelaide, I wouldn’t give a shit if he was currently the father of the kid that you’re carrying inside of you. He’s known you almost his entire life, and he knows how to get under your skin. What he did the other day… he fucking did that shit on purpose, whether you want to admit it to yourself or not. He knew he could get to you. He knows you still feel something for him, and he’s going to keep bringing it up to the surface as much as he can. I promise you, he doesn’t give the slightest shit how much he hurts you while he does it. Tristan is a selfish son of a bitch, and he will go to whatever means is necessary to take you back home with him.”
I instantly went defensive. Tristan and I had our differences, but I knew he still cared about me in his own sick, twisted way, just as Joey did.
“Tristan fucking cares about me, River?—”
“Not in the way he fucking should, Adelaide,” River cut me off, his voice remaining calm, though I knew if had he been arguing with anyone else, he would have lost his shit already. “You’re a woman that deserves to be treasured.” I swallowed hard at his words, my chest tight. “I know you’re not the easiest woman to please and that sometimes being with you can be like handling the most fragile piece of glass—one wrong move, and it could all go to shit. I know that you’ve got a temper, and ninety-nine percent of the time, you speak without thinking first.” My breath hitched in my throat. He knew me so fucking well. My heart swelled in my chest as tears burned at the backs of my eyes.
He looked at me, letting his blue eyes meet mine. “You’re an independent woman, Adelaide, and you don’t like feeling like someone is controlling you. You require a certain kind of care and love, and Tristan doesn’t give a shit enough to understand that. He never will. As long as he’s happy, not a fucking thing else matters to him.”
I opened my mouth to speak, but he cut me off before I could. “Adelaide, I love you,” he confessed, making my breath hitch in my throat again as those tears I’d been holding back spilled over onto my cheeks. “I love that you’re not easy to please. I love that I have to handle you with extra care. I love that you’ve got a fiery ass temper and that you’re not afraid to speak what you feel. I don’t mind that you’re an independent kind of woman, Adelaide. I don’t want a woman I have to control all of the time. I want and need a woman who is capable of making her own decisions and capable of taking care of her family if the time ever comes for it.”
He gently set down a sleeping Axel on the bed and reached over to cradle my face in his hands as tears streamed down my cheeks. “Tristan and Joey never understood you, Adelaide. They never tried to. I think Joey understood to an extent, but both of those men just wanted to keep you on a tight leash, and it made them lose you multiple times.” My bottom lip trembled as a quiet sob fell from my lips. “Darlin’, you require a special kind of love and care, and I’m prepared to give that to you. You don’t need to be controlled. You just need some freedom, Adelaide, and I know that as long as I give you everything you need, you’ll be here right beside me where you belong, where I need you to be. And that’s something no other man will never understand about you.”
“Fuck, River,” I choked out as I threw my arms around his neck and pressed my lips to his. He instantly kissed me back as I straddled his lap, wrapping my legs around his hips. “I love you, too.” My voice trembled on my confession, but how could it not when River had just poured his fucking heart out to me?
He peppered gentle kisses all over my face. “Promise me you’ll never try to make excuses for Tristan or Joey ever again,” he begged me. “Because if I can figure you out, then they could have, too. Joey is trying now. I know that. But when you were his, he still didn’t get it.”
I nodded, realizing he was right. I hadn’t once felt trapped with River as I had with Tristan and Joey. With River, I could be independent. I could be myself without having to worry about any backlash. I could snap at him without fear of him getting angry at me and trying to dominate me, trying to pull that leash tight around my neck.
Turning to the side on River’s lap, I reached over and picked Axel up, holding him in my arms as River leaned back against the headboard, his arms wrapped around me as I leaned my head on his chest, Axel cradled against my belly.
I was home. I never wanted to be anywhere else.