23
I follow Ruby through the glass door and blink at the bright lights inside Main Street Drugstore. I feel like I’ve been in a cloudy fog for the last week. Angry, sad, and stupid. But that’s what I get for getting too close. For letting Ford Montgomery in.
He charmed me. With his broody good lucks and aw-shucks grin and we’re-just-friends promises. I trusted him.
And it was a mistake. Because I lost him.
But did I ever really have him?
He wants to know, and I don’t blame him. But how do I talk about it? All these years, it’s been my dirty little secret. I’ve never told anyone. It’s not like ripping a band-aid off. It’s like peeling the skin off my skeleton. All the gory parts will show. What if he’s disgusted by what he sees? What if one day he decides I’m not enough anymore?
It’s better this way. The closer I get to being free of Gavin, the closer Ford comes to learning the truth.
“Reese?”
I shake myself out of my daze and take in Ruby’s smiling face. I hitched a ride into town with her, because I refused to borrow Ford’s truck. After our fight, I don’t want anything from him.
Except him.
I miss him. It’s been a week since he called it quits. A week since I’ve been in his bed. Since those calloused fingertips have run up my body with the gentle ease I’m used to. My body aches for him. But he’s right. It’s better this way.
No strings. Just friends. Without any of the benefits.
“C’mon,” Ruby says. “You haven’t had a Resurrection shopping experience until you’ve bought cow dewormer and a bolo tie.”
We shop the aisles, and I add a box of hair color, nail polish, a few bags of gummy bears to my basket. Then I make my way toward the pharmacy. I want to show Gavin I’m still filling my prescription. But I’ve stopped taking the pills.
The spectacled pharmacist looks up from her screen. Snaps a bubble. “You’re sure this is your prescription?”
“Yes, I’m pretty sure it’s mine.” I watch as she slowly moves the orange bottle and a clipboard to the counter.
I sign my name as the pharmacist snaps another bubble. “I don’t know. What did you say your name was again? Are you—”
I grab up the pills and turn on my heel before she can ask any more questions.
“Are people always this nosy here?” I ask Ruby as we check out.
Ruby giggles. “Small town. Your business is their business.”
I laugh. “Should put that on the town crest.”
Linking arms, Ruby attaches herself to my side as we push out the front door and exit onto Main Street. The hem of her floral sundress flares as she bounces us down the street. “Let’s go see Dakota’s bakery.”
We turn the corner when I feel eyes on me. I freeze. My heart pounds in my chest. A black SUV is parked two blocks away. Gavin? Paparazzi? I squint, trying to get a better look. Before I can, it slowly drives off, turning down a side street.
“Reese?”
I shake off the chill that’s settled in my bones.
“Let’s go.”
A purple paradise awaits us in Dakota’s bakery. Every shade under the sun decorates the shop. Though it’s still under construction—paper screens obscuring the windows, and the countertops unfinished—the décor is above and beyond. Marble and lilac accents, floral garland, penny tile, and a flashing neon pinball machine complete the space.
“Oh, Dakota,” Ruby gasps, hands clasped to her heart. She spins, taking it all in.
“It’s beautiful,” I tell Dakota. “It reminds of Paris.”
“Best compliment ever,” Dakota says. Her long black hair is curled in loose waves around her face. There’s a dusting of flour on her cheek. “Thank you.”
“When do you open?” I ask.
“Two weeks.” Dakota takes off her apron, revealing tight-fitting jeans and a silk blouse, and drapes it over the counter. “The night of the rodeo. It’s our unofficial official opening. We’ll have a booth there. Then the next day, we’re officially open.” She slides a platter of pastries our way. “Eat.”
“Right on Main Street,” Ruby says, picking at a pumpkin scone. “Nobody can miss it. It’s the perfect place.”
“It’s a dream,” Dakota agrees. “I never thought I’d have this.” Her eyes take on a faraway sheen. “Any of this.”
Dreams.
It hits me like a lightning strike.
I want my dreams.
“If ranch work isn’t your thing,” Dakota says to me, wiggling her dark brows, “I could always use help at the bakery.”
I smile. I’m learning I might not be able to trust Gavin, but I can trust these women. I like them. Dakota always has a fresh pastry for me, and Ruby brings flowers to brighten up my chalet. It feels like I’ve been let into a glimmery circle of light.
The door swings open. Fallon walks in, duffel bag hooked over her shoulders. She’s in torn jeans, boots and a tank top tied at the midriff. Her sharp hazel eyes scour the space before landing on her sister. “You ready?”
Dakota laughs. “If you say so.”
Fallon pounds on the wall. The reverberation causes a photo to hang crooked on the wall. “Time to drink.”
Sunday afternoon and Nowhere is busier than church. Scuffed wooden floors. Dirt-cheap whiskey. Grizzled men huddled on corner barstools. If the walls and floors in Nowhere could talk, they’d have serious stories to tell.
Beef, the bartender from my dance-on-the-bar escapade, groans when he sees us. He runs a massive hand over his bald head. “You’re back.”
“I am back.” I bat my eyes at him. “I’ll behave this time.”
“I’ll vouch for her,” Ruby says.
“Shots?” Beef asks, his face softening slightly in Ruby’s presence.
“Shots,” Dakota instructs, bellying up to the bar. “I’ve been working all week. Keep them coming.”
“I’ll look at the menu, but I already know I’m getting the fries,” Fallon says, dropping onto a bar stool.
“Comin’ up.” Beef gives me a conspiratorial look. “Try not to dance on anymore bar tops.”
I lift my hand. “Scout’s honor.”
“This is it,” Dakota says as we take seats at the bar. Dakota and I are sandwiched between Ruby and Fallon. “The cure for idiot men is Nowhere.”
I arch a brow. “Why Nowhere?”
Ruby looks thrilled. “Because they realize what they have when you’re here.”
“Is that why we’re here?” I ask. “To bait Ford?”
“How is your broody cat daddy?” Fallon asks me.
“I wouldn’t know,” I say. “I haven’t talked to him.”
“That explains it,” Dakota says.
“Explains what?” I ask.
Dakota smirks. “Why he’s moping all over the ranch.”
I feel a tiny sliver of satisfaction I’ve managed to get under Ford Montgomery’s skin.
“I’ve never seen him so grumpy,” Dakota says.
Fallon shakes her head. “He’s always grumpy.”
“Do you like him?” Ruby looks hopeful.
Beef returns with the shots, crystal clear tequila and a deep honey-colored whiskey. The color reminds me of Ford’s eyes.
My cheeks heat. “I mean, we’re friends,” I say, trying to act like I don’t care. To kill the sting of the lie, I could take the shot. But I don’t need a stiff drink to deal with this.
Fallon scoffs. “Men and women can’t be friends.” She slugs down a shot, then drinks mine. “They’re either trying to kiss you or trying to kill you. Trust me, I know.”
Beside me, Dakota’s gone pale.
I bite my lip, look at Fallon. “I hope it’s okay, but Ford told me what happened to you last year. I’m sorry.”
Fallon lifts a hand like she’s waving away my apology. “Whole town knows. You might as well join the club.” Another shot.
Dakota eyes her sister, a worried expression on her face. “Are you sure you should be drinking with your medication?”
“No, I’m not sure, but YOLO, right?”
Dakota and Ruby share a wide-eyed look of concern.
“Fuck Danny or Aiden or whatever the hell his name was,” Fallon says, raising her empty shot glass. Dakota winces. “Rot in hell, asshole.”
“Yeah, fuck that guy,” Beef says, setting down fresh drinks and a water for me. With a flick of the wrist, he sails a fancy pink drink down to Ruby who promptly attaches it to her lips.
“Okay, so at this bar, we do this thing,” Ruby says when she comes up for air. Big blue eyes wide, she leans in. “We tell the truth, we don’t bullshit.”
“Honesty for honesty?” I ask.
“A-fucking-men,” Fallon enunciates.
“What happened between you and Ford?” Dakota asks. “And I only ask because for one perfectly pleasant month he wasn’t broody and bitching and I’d like to solve the mystery for my own sanity.”
“We’re on a break. Or something.” I laugh, then sigh. “I think he got scared. I hurt him when I wouldn’t open up.”
“People who are scared push,” Dakota remarks. “I know he’s been through a lot in the past.”
Damn it. It makes sense. Ford told me about his ex and her betrayal, and I probably just tore open the wound with my silence. That night, his gaze held a weight I hadn’t seen before. Like he was trying to get himself under control. Like he was worried. Like he cared too much and hated himself for it.
A ghost of a smile plays on Ruby’s lips. “Maybe he’s scared because of what you mean to him.”
I pick up my water. “We don’t mean anything.” The harsh statement goes straight to my heart. It feels like it’s boiling.
Fallon leans an elbow on the bar. “What about you? How’s your love life, Beef?”
Beef runs a hand down his scraggly beard. “I’ll let you know when she moves in.”
Ruby and Dakota hoot as Fallon pounds the bar top. “Now I have to know. A name.”
“Nope. Bad luck.” More shots appear in front of us. “This one is special. She’s got a mouth like a razor blade.” Goofy grin on his face, he moves down the bar.
Fallon wrinkles her nose. “Ugh, god, delete that image from my brain.”
Dakota’s thoughtful expression returns to me. “The ranch is for secrets, but they always come out.”
Ruby breathes through her shot. “I lied to Charlie about my heart condition.”
“And what happened?” I ask.
Pink stains her cheeks. “He loved me anyway.”
My chest is heavy. Even if I told Ford about Muirwood, there’s no love between us.
“We all have painful pasts but that’s why you find your people,” Dakota says. Her dark eyes linger on me. “The right people can handle it—hold it—but you have to tell them when you’re ready.”
“I don’t feel like I have any people,” I admit, cradling my bangles to my chest. “Sometimes I feel like a square peg trying to fit in a round hole.”
“That’s the best way to feel.” Fallon grins at me. “Then you show ’em how the fuck it’s done.”
I smile at her.
“You’re not a square peg,” Ruby croons. Her voice is strong, firm. “You’re our circle. And you have us.”
Happiness washes gently over me.
Turns out, this is exactly what I needed.
In the music industry, true friends are a rarity. Other singers, songwriters acted like they were your best friends, when really all they were waiting to do was screw you over.
Here, in this dirty dive bar, with these women, I feel like I belong. Like it’s one more inch toward New Reese. Toward a life of normality.
A cowboy in a bolo tie approaches. A Sharpie in his hand, gaze lasered on me. Hard glares on their face, Ruby and Dakota swivel on their barstools, blocking me in.
But it’s Fallon who stands.
“You don’t know her,” she growls with a mean smile. “And if you think you do, no you fucking do not, understand me?”
I smother a grin, touched by her protection. It’s clear Fallon lives and breathes to bully men at the bar.
The man looks at me. “I just wanted a—”
“Out.” Fallon snaps her fingers. “ Beef .”
Floorboards rattle, and with a sigh, Beef appears. He flexes a fist. “Let’s go, man. You bother the women, you bother me.”
“Do you miss that?” Dakota asks, wagging a finger at the man who’s being escorted out of the bar by Beef.
“No way. I miss nothing about that life.” I prop my chin in my palm, my stomach warm from the whiskey. “I don’t want to be a superstar—”
“I do,” Fallon interjects with a grin.
“I just want to be Reese. It probably sounds weird giving it all up, but…”
“Not weird at all,” Dakota muses with a smile. “I thought I wanted a big fancy bakery in Paris or New York, but this life I made beats everything.”
I glance at her—listening as she explains her past with Aiden King.
“Whoa.” I sit back in my bar stool, awed by her story. “You survived, Koty.”
Her eyes glisten. “I did.”
“I didn’t know what I wanted,” Ruby says. “Or even what I could have with my condition. And I found it here.”
A stab of hope rattles inside of me. I’m inspired by Dakota and Ruby. Both of them made something good out of shitty circumstances.
It’s like a whole world of possibilities expands in front of my eyes. What if I went to school? What if I started my own label? And then—What if I stayed here? What if Ford and I worked it out?
For the summer. There’s still so much time. It seems like a shame to waste it.
“We can change our life at any time,” Dakota says sagely. “Sometimes you just need a boost.”
“And more tequila,” Fallon says.
My boost was Ford. All summer he’s had my back. He’s been my rock.
“Ugh,” I groan. “I miss him.”
All eyes turn to me.
“Who?” Dakota asks.
“Don’t say it,” Fallon warns me. “Then you’re in it.”
I wince. “Ford.”
Ruby squeals.
I bury my face in my hands. “I disgust myself.”
“But the question is…” Ruby bounces in her chair like she’s my own personal shrink. “Why do you disgust yourself?”
“Because I’m hiding from him. Because I reacted on the defensive. Because I’ve never known what a normal life has looked like until I got here and met Ford. He’s showed me things no one ever has.”
At Fallon’s raised eyebrow, I laugh. “Not like that. Boring things like balancing a checkbook and opening my own bank account. But he’s also the best damn kisser.” I finger the gold horseshoe necklace around my neck, my heart a wild thrum inside my chest. “And I’ve kissed a lot of guys. But…”
Ruby claps her hands together. “But?”
“But not like Ford,” I say softly. “He’s a man.”
“A cowboy,” Ruby whispers. She looks swoony.
“Yeah.” A hot flush creeps up my cheeks. I’ve already said more than I should have. Surprisingly, it feels nice. Honesty.
“Is it hot in here?” Ruby exhales. She fans her face. “Or is it just me?”
Fallon grins. “It’s because you’re a ho for a cowboy, Ruby, and that’s okay to admit.”
Dakota mainlines a shot. “One thing about grumpy cowboys with impeccable face cards—they’re gonna put you through the mattress.”
“Ugh,” Fallon says, slapping a hand to her face. “Why are you so domestic and gross?”
Ruby bites her lower lip. “Which reminds me…did anyone tell our cowboys where we are?”
“Do they care?” I ask.
Dakota laughs. “Blue-collar men gossip worse than any female in Hollywood. I guarantee you they’re sitting around right now talking and worrying and wondering where we are.” Her smile is wicked. “Trust me. It’s good to make them sweat every once in a while.”
“You’ll find the right time to talk to Ford,” Ruby says sympathetically.
“Or the wrong,” Fallon quips. She slugs down a shot and tries to stand but falls into her sister.
Dakota steadies Fallon. Hiccups. “We need to call someone.”