Chapter Fifty-Three
“WHAT IS THIS PLACE?” I ASKED as Lucien slammed open the double doors, leading into a pavilion. Outside, it looked like a shrine with neatly tended magnolia trees and two empty rocking chairs. Inside, it was lived-in and homely.
Letting me go, Lucien flicked a switch, flooding the space with soft light. Floor-to-ceiling bookshelves kept watch over a large rosewood desk. A maroon silk rug rested on the floor, while a tan leather couch and two matching chairs waited by one of the large circular windows.
“This is my father’s study,” Lucien said quietly, guiding me toward the couch and sitting hard as if his knees suddenly gave out. I went to sit next to him, but he jerked me down, placing me on his lap.
My arm automatically looped around his neck for balance. “Eh, what are you doing?”
He locked his arm around me as I tried to scramble off.
He rested his other hand possessively on my thigh.
“Don’t let go of me,” he murmured into my ear as Dillon stepped into the office, his eyes darting everywhere, no doubt seeking exits and weapons.
“I’m doing my best to stay in control but.
..with you close, I have a much better chance of not killing him. ”
My eyes whipped to Lucien’s as he pulled back.
The bond between us flared bright.
His arm tightened around me as if he knew I could feel him, his forehead pressing to mine as he sagged into me.
I couldn’t stop it.
Couldn’t hide it even as Dillon took the chair next to the couch and sucked in a breath as my hair froze with crystals and my skin turned pale, pale blue. The frigid temperature of my blood sank into the scorching burn of Lucien, cooling him, soothing him, blaring all my secrets.
The padding of heavy paws announced Whisper’s arrival. His whiskers flared as he snarled at Dillon, prowled like a liquid shadow to the couch, then sat proudly at Lucien’s feet.
Tension rippled down Lucien’s thighs as he snapped, “Go on then. Speak.”
“About that drink?” Dillon never looked away.
“You’ll get one when you’ve explained. So...explain.”
“I think I should be saying that to you.” He waved at us, arching his eyebrow at me sitting on Lucien’s lap.
I tried to slip off and sit on the couch like an adult, but Lucien just held me tighter. “We owe you nothing and you’ll get nothing.”
Dillon didn’t speak for a long moment. “Fine. But first...I need a few answers from you, Rook. Just to put my mind at rest. Then I’ll submit to whatever inquisition you have in mind.”
Lucien’s grip tightened. A wisp of his jealousy bled through the bond.
“Alright,” I said softly. “What...what do you want to know?”
“Everything.” His face fell but his eyes stayed wary. “Were you truly just playing your usual games of chase or were you trying to run away from me?”
So, we were going straight to the hard stuff. Good to know.
I shrugged helplessly. “I have no idea what I should say to that.”
“Just tell me the truth.” Dillon narrowed his eyes.
“Tell me everything that happened since I last heard from you in Koh Lanta. I’d only just arrived when I realised you were already gone.
Were you trapped? Are you mad at me? Are you alright?
Just...tell me you’ve been safe for the past eight weeks, and I’ll drop it. ”
“Sorry for making you worry again.” I fell into familiar patterns, half-contrite, half-smug. “And I’m sorry for the hassle of the past ten years.”
He rolled his eyes with a groan. “You truly are driving me to drink, you know that, right?” He gave me one last search—his trained eye hunting out any injuries.
He wouldn’t find any (thanks to Lucien’s blood). He didn’t need to know about Cinderkeep (not yet, anyway). And...God, I wanted him to be on my side.
“Looks like you’re still in one piece. Nice dress by the way—way better than those scruffy shorts you usually travel in.
” He yawned and slouched with a great sigh, releasing the past two months of hunting me.
“Okay, I’ll stop fretting. However...you can expect an expensive therapist bill next time you go MIA. ”
My heart warmed. His eyes softened.
Seemed I wasn’t the only one affected by the years between us.
Glancing around the room, his gaze lit up as he spied a row of earthen jars on a sideboard by the library.
Pushing off the chair with a heavy groan, he clomped in black boots to the side table, snagged a jar, uncorked the wooden stopper, sniffed it, and took a long swig.
Lucien turned fiery beneath me, but I merely shook my head.
No matter what secrets Dillon had, I technically did owe him a drink.
Many in fact.
Bringing his pilfered beverage back to join us, Dillon sat in an exhausted sprawl and cheers-ed me with the bottle. “To you, Elara freaking Snowflake.”
I rolled my eyes. “You’re such a pain in my ass.”
“I’m a pain in the ass?” He snorted, taking another mouthful. “I haven’t slept in weeks, thanks to you.” Grumbling under his breath, he added, “If only I’d known what I was getting into being your personal security. I would’ve—”
“Locked her in a cage and thrown away the key?” Lucien cut in, his own experience tempering his words.
Dillon froze. “Excuse me?”
“Would’ve made your life a hell of a lot easier, rather than chasing after something so special, huh?”
“She’s not something, asshole. She’s someone.”
“To me she is.” Lucien nodded. “To Whisper she is. But to you and those you work for? I’m not so sure.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“It means—”
“Lucien.” Pressing my mouth to his ear, I whispered, “You’re smoking.”
With a soft growl, Lucien clung to me as if I could dampen the fire threatening to break out of his skin.
Dillon’s temper landed on me. “You know what...just tell me what you’re hiding, Rook. I know something’s happened.” His eyes narrowed. “You’re wary of me. And...I feel like I’ve let you down. Do you hate me because I wasn’t there to protect you?”
“She had me,” Lucien snapped. “I was there.”
“Yes, and that’s the problem.” Dillon narrowed his eyes. “You’re the problem.”
“How do you know that pear wine you’re drinking isn’t poisoned?” Lucien smiled.
Dillon scowled at the bottle then drank again as if he was too tired to care.
I thought I could do this.
I thought I could be brave but...
“Can I trust you, Dil?” I asked quietly.
He sat bolt upright. “What sort of question is that?”
“We’ve been together for over a decade. Are you loyal to me or are you loyal to Snowflake Corp?”
“You are Snowflake Corp.”
“Just answer the question.”
Lucien burned again and my body sent an automatic blanket of snow his way. He pressed a gentle kiss against my neck, shocking me stupid.
Dillon scowled.
I caught Lucien’s eyes and everything caught alight.
Our first meeting.
Our first conversation.
Our first touch, first kiss, first thrust.
He’d freed me from so much pain.
Captured my heart with so much belonging.
I could do this.
If Dillon hurt me, Lucien would heal me.
I would be brave.
Twisting on Lucien’s lap to face Dillon, I focused entirely on my bodyguard.
“I’ve trusted you like the grumpy brother I never had.
I secretly loved having you chase me because I knew that no matter where I was or how bad the pain got, you were only hours away to help me.
You’ve held me through some of the worst attacks.
You’ve travelled with me to some of the most remote locations.
And I’ve never once felt like I was just a job to you.
So I need you to tell me the truth, Dil.
I need to know whatever it is that you’re hiding because.
..the thought that you’ve been lying to me all this time hurts far, far too much. ”
Silence fell.
Dillon never looked away from me. It took an age before he nodded. “Fine.” Finishing the wine, he placed the empty jar on the coffee table and shifted to the edge of the chair. “I’ll be straight with you. I’ll tell you everything because...I agree. It’s about damn time we had this conversation.”
I swallowed hard.
“Before your parents died, I did have different reasons for guarding you.” He frowned, dropping his stare to the floor.
“No matter where you went or what you did, I was tasked in reporting everything back. They wanted to know who you saw, what mood you were in, if anything unusual happened.” The sentence lingered in the air, heavy and loud.
He caught my eyes again. “However, when your parents passed away, no one came for the reports I’d grown used to compiling.
No one paid any attention to me. Frank Lampton gave me carte blanche to do whatever was necessary to protect you and I think the rest of them forgot I was even on the payroll.
” His voice softened. “So if you’re asking me if I’ve reported where you’ve been, who you’ve met, and the differences in you, my answer is no. I haven’t. And I wouldn’t. Not now.”
Sinking back against the tan leather seat, he added, “I’ve grown incredibly fond of you, Rook. You’re a pain in my ass and I miss sleeping in my own bed but...I would never betray you.”
“Why?” Lucien growled. “If you’re so used to spying on her, why would you turn a blind eye when things are obviously not quite right with her.
” He smiled thinly. “And don’t think I didn’t notice your interest when she helped calm me down.
I know you saw her frosting. Are you honestly going to sit there and tell me you wouldn’t sell her out? ”
The question was eerily close to the one he’d asked me the first time he’d slept in my bed—after he’d stumbled into my pavilion in Cinderkeep and used me to take away his pain.
Exhaling heavily, Dillon shook his head. “No, I wouldn’t. Not just because Rook has always been special, but because...she seems to have found someone who’s similar to herself.”
“That doesn’t answer my question,” Lucien snapped.
“Money doesn’t matter that much to me,” Dillon replied with a weary shrug.
“So there isn’t a figure that would make me blab.
Besides, I’m not the nosy type, especially about things I don’t understand.
I’m...superstitious in that way. There will always be things in this world that don’t make sense and.
..the huldufólk have proven that there are unexplainable forces that you just don’t mess with. ”
“Hulldoo folk?” Lucien asked.
“Huldufólk. Back home in Iceland, you don’t build on certain sites. Don’t dig where the ground feels wrong—”
Lucien scoffed lightly.
Dillon didn’t find it funny. “Laugh all you want, but when machinery keeps failing in the same spot and livestock refuse to go near a certain hillside...you learn to leave certain things alone and respect what you can’t explain.
” Arching his chin at me, he added softly, “I’ve learned to respect Rook in the same way. ”
His eyes narrowed on me. “If you’re doubting my loyalty then let me assure you, I’m not trying to keep you safe for any other reason than I like you.
Alive. Besides.” He stretched out his legs, his black boots crossing at the ankles.
“If you died, I’d be unemployed. And after you?
I’d be bored to fucking tears guarding anyone else. ”
I laughed a little.
Lucien’s jaw flexed.
Whisper never took his eyes off Dillon.
“I have a question.” Dillon pointed at the panther. “Is that thing going to eat me the moment I turn my back?”
“That thing is the least of your problems.” Lucien’s fire kindled again.
“Easy,” I whispered, resting my hand on his arm that was slung arrogantly over my legs.
He glowered at me before visibly restraining himself.
“Now that I’ve answered your questions...is there somewhere I can crash?” Dillon yawned. “I’m exhausted.”
“Eh...about that.” I shot a wary look at Lucien before saying, “Perhaps it would be best if you headed home? You could take some time off and—”
“No way.” Dillon snapped upright. “If you’re planning on hanging around here for a bit then I’ll stay.”
“But—”
“Give me a chance to actually do my job and protect you, Rook. I’m staying.”
“Before you invite yourself into my home,” Lucien said softly, leaning forward to cage me in his arms. “It’s my turn to ask a question.”
“Fine.” Dillon sniffed. “What is it?”
Lucien smiled like a man about to unleash hell. “Are you in love with her?”
“Excuse me?” Dillon’s eyebrows flew up.
“Are you in love with her?” Lucien went fatally still.
My heart pounded. I already knew the answer. There was nothing—
“I love her,” Dillon said plainly.
What?!
The room turned blisteringly hot as Lucien turned into a human incense burner.
“I love her,” Dillon repeated like an idiot. “But...not in the way you’re implying.” His blue gaze fell on mine, softening with affection. “I love her like a pesky sister. I love her because she’s become my only family. And—”
His eyes dropped to my throat.
He blanched. “Rook...where’s your necklace?”