Chapter Sixty-Two
LOVE LIKE THIS SHOULDN’T EXIST.
Not for someone...something...like me.
I’d done everything I could to run from affection. I’d spent my lifetime killing anyone who tried to get close.
Yet her?
I would never get enough. Never be worthy enough. Never have the strength to let her go.
I studied her in the dark—drinking in her black eyelashes and imprinting her honeyed cheeks. I memorised her perfect lips and inhaled her delicious scent.
Whisper never took his glowing eyes off me as I sat upright and tucked the blankets tighter around her. She mumbled in her sleep and rolled over, looking so small and fragile and mine.
The surge of possession and blinding, blistering love almost made me buckle over.
It was the same level of connection I’d felt bleeding from her earlier this evening. An echo of her fear had rippled down the bond, distracting me from my father’s maps.
I didn’t know what had made her feel so desperately, but I felt the same way now.
If anything ever happened to her.
If anyone ever hurt her—
Fuck.
Fire raced down my arms, external and dangerous instead of internal and smouldering. Being this close to her soothed me—I didn’t have to work nearly so hard to contain the power stalking within my veins, but...I couldn’t sleep.
Not after what I’d read.
The scribbled note to some unknown sender—that I’d found tucked down the back of a drawer—haunted me like a dirty secret.
It almost seemed like fate was taunting me. Not only had I narrowed the screaming mountain that Lao Li mentioned to a potential disused cave system in the east, but...the note proved something was going on.
––––––––
To, K,
They’re trying to create another like my son.
Ever since you took him and sent him back...he’s different.
His crib keeps smoking. His bathwater keeps boiling.
I’m trying to hide it from the staff, but he’s getting worse.
There are rumours that the Eastern Crucible has been reopened.
And not for Brimstone reactors.
You need to shut them down.
Meilin and I are trapped and can’t get out, but Wen can be trusted. If you get this message, please find a way to destroy it.
And I’ll...I’ll find a way to stop my son.
Jin.
––––––––
Not save. Not help. Stop.
Did that mean my father was planning on killing me?
What if the one man who was meant to love me unconditionally decided I was too dangerous to stay alive?
But if he believed that, why had he given me a lifeline beyond his grave? Why give me access to Sovereign Retrieval? Who was he writing to?
What the fuck is going on in that mountain?!
The fire simmering in my chest grew hotter. I didn’t like so many unanswered questions. I didn’t like my past overshadowing my future, all while my present was still so unknown.
Rook shifted, her foot sneaking under the blankets to find me in her sleep.
The bond between us tugged, her feelings feathering into me.
Fear and worry, love and loyalty.
She frowned as if her dreams turned to nightmares. Nightmares full of loss and pain and panic.
I went to gather her in my arms, but...
I suffered the same feelings.
The same clawing dread.
Something was waiting in that mountain.
I needed to go. Had to find out. But...I didn’t want to risk hurting her.
She’d already seen far too much death thanks to me.
And if the note was true. If Lao Li’s ramblings weren’t pure madness...that meant my hands would be coated in blood before I was through.
Leaning over her, I brushed my lips over her cool cheek. “I refuse to put you in danger, little ice heart. Not now.”
Not now, when losing her would slaughter me.
If I let my vengeance be the reason she got hurt. If I took her with me into certain carnage and she suffered because of me...
I’ll never forgive myself.
Slipping out of bed, I padded silently through the darkness to the wardrobe.
I didn’t bother showering. I wanted to keep her on my skin—to use her scent as a way to control myself while we were apart. Pulling on my familiar black uniform and black boots, I wished I had a gun or two.
Then again, I was used to knives. I’d taken countless lives with a blade.
Palming a few daggers that I’d been given as a child—heirlooms with dragon-carved handles—I wedged them into my waistband. At least, wearing all black, bloodstains wouldn’t show if I cut someone’s throat tonight.
Whisper prowled toward me, his whiskers flaring as if tasting my burning.
Ducking to my haunches, I grabbed his cheeks. “Once again, I’m going to ask you to protect her.” Pressing my forehead to his, I stayed there for a moment before standing and stalking to the door. “Don’t leave her side.”
I paused on the threshold, my eyes catching Whisper’s as he went to stand guard over a sleeping Rook.
Rook continued to snooze safely.
My hands balled with the vicious need to keep her that way.
The urge to defend her was visceral—an instinct carved deep into my bones. My only purpose was to protect her—even from myself, which meant I would clean up my messes so she no longer had to suffer.
With one last look, I told myself I would return before she woke.
I was wrong.