CHAPTER FIFTEEN
Blair
I arrived at the studio for another swimwear ad two days later, pulling into the parking lot with jitters in my belly just like the previous time. However, this time, my fear came true because a Range Rover was parked near the entrance.
My stomach turned, and I took a deep breath. So I was going to see him this time.
I told myself I got this and headed off to the dressing room, but halfway there, he appeared in front of me, and my heart stopped in my chest.
Nope. I wasn’t nearly as ready to see him as I’d thought I was.
“Blair, it’s so good to see you here.” His lips formed a wide smile that revealed his thousands of dollars’ worth of white teeth, which shone unnaturally. He leaned in and kissed my cheek, his mustache scraping my skin. “Ever so early.”
I ordered my muscles to relax and smiled, holding my breath against the strong scent of his cologne. “Good morning, Mr. Dyson.”
He ran his hands down his navy pressed jacket as though to even some invisible wrinkle. “Mr. Dyson? Why so formal?” He leaned back to me. “I’ve told you many times to call me Will, sweetheart,” he whispered in my ear.
I closed my eyes, feeling the bile rise in my throat. William, or Will, was the local government official and Dad’s business associate. He helped Dad secure construction permits, which made him very important to Dad’s business empire.
Also, he was fixated on me.
Only later did I learn that he’d decided to sponsor the swimwear brand because he’d heard I was involved with it.
It gave him an opportunity to ogle me without having to account for it, and each time I had to pose in swimwear in front of him, I felt like something withered in me more.
Dad found it convenient and told me to keep him interested.
“A new hairstyle? I like it.” He ran his fingers over a strand of my hair, and I fought not to shove his hand away.
“Thank you, William. I have to go. I don’t want to keep the makeup artist waiting.”
He placed a hand on my shoulder. “I can’t wait to see what you’re going to wear today. You’re doing such an amazing job.” His thumb brushed over my skin, and I fisted my hand so I wouldn’t slap him.
“Mm-hmm. See you later.”
“Later, sweetheart.”
I took measured steps as I continued ahead, feeling his gaze on me the whole time. Finally, I slammed the door of the dressing room shut behind me and leaned against it with my eyes closed.
I never did anything to encourage him, but then again, I didn’t have to.
He was already obsessed with me, which had started the previous May, a month before I turned eighteen.
He was a year shy of fifty then. Dad had introduced me to him and told me to make sure I never gave him a reason to be unsatisfied.
He was too valuable an asset for him for that.
Ever since then, I’d been on the receiving end of his flirty comments and smiles, and I couldn’t complain whenever he “accidentally” brushed his hand too close to my breasts or ass because it was what was expected of me. All for the family.
And then there was everything else.
I shuddered, pushing the memories aside and focusing only on the task at hand. His presence would make the shoot much harder to handle, but I could manage it. I’d handled much worse. This would be a piece of cake compared to all that.
The shoot felt like it dragged on. I pretended the whole time William wasn’t watching me across the room as I changed poses on a deck chair, his gaze making me feel wholly naked again.
I was already devising ways to avoid him once the shoot finished, but he didn’t even give me a chance to take another route to the dressing room, approaching me right away.
His shoes crunched in the sand surrounding me.
“Would you like to go for coffee with me?”
My stomach turned. I grabbed the bathrobe from one of the assistants and tied it tightly around my waist in three seconds flat.
“Sorry. I’m busy these days.”
His brows went low, and coldness blasted off him instantly. “That’s such a shame, Blair. I would love to spend some time with you. It’s been a while since we’ve been together.”
And if I had any say in it, it wouldn’t happen ever again.
But I didn’t have any say in it.
Though, for now, I could handle Dad’s anger once he found out I rejected William. It would buy me some time until I could no longer delay the inevitable.
“I know, but you know how busy it can get. All these photo shoots and other stuff.” I released a loud sigh and fanned my face in exaggerated moves, putting on an airhead kind of expression. “I have to go now. Bye, William.”
I didn’t wait for his reply and walked away, not caring how rude I might be or how he hated people dismissing him, just like my dad. Until Dad told me I absolutely had to go out with William, I would make sure to stay away from him.
By the time I changed back into my clothes and reached the parking lot, his car was already gone.
It was after midnight when I returned home, my body heavy with exhaustion. All the anxiety coursing through me since I saw William had taken its toll, but I knew I wouldn’t be able to sleep. Bad thoughts would haunt me, so I needed to silence them first.
I dressed in a black high-neck swimming suit and went outside to the pool, not bothering to bring a towel with me.
Clouds shrouded the moon, so the only source of illumination in the otherwise dark garden was the small lights dotting the bottom of the pool.
I stopped at the edge of the pool and stared at them, reminded of the flashes of cameras and all that followed.
My next ad shoot was scheduled in three days. I didn’t want to go.
Filming ads was just one of many things I didn’t enjoy doing.
The long, grueling hours in our home gym as instructed by my mom to stay in shape?
I hated it. Going to various functions and networking when I could barely stand those people?
I hated it. Always suppressing my emotions because I didn’t have the luxury of having outbursts in public?
I hated it. I was molded by what society expected me to be through and through.
Society wanted pretty packages. They wanted glamour.
That was the currency around here. And I wanted the comfort of fitting right into that image they had of us, so much that it was deeply ingrained in me.
My personal videos were the only thing I had that was completely me—the only thing that was real, a piece of freedom in the otherwise oppressive world. But I would never be allowed to post them publicly.
I jumped into the pool.
What did I really want? Who was I without all the money and preconceived notions? If I wasn’t supposed to assume the role my parents wanted me to, who would I be?
I swam underwater for as long as I could, my lungs burning when I broke through the surface and gulped for a breath. I leaned my head against the edge of the pool, letting my body float as I looked up at the few stars I could find among the dark clouds.
“Do you want to drown yourself?”
I gasped, looking to the side to see Zach sitting in the chair by the patio table. His eyes raked over my body, and even in the darkness surrounding him, I could see them shining.
The image of his face between my legs flashed in my mind, and I felt my body heating.
“Not even that will save you from me.”
I put my feet on the bottom of the pool. “How long have you been here?”
“The whole time.”
My heart jolted against my rib cage. “You should’ve told me you were here.”
He smiled. “And miss seeing you so troubled? Not a chance.”
I pushed myself out of the water to sit on the edge. “I’m not troubled.”
“Maybe you think you’re a good liar, but I can see through your lies.
You would’ve gone to bed if you weren’t.
” I shivered. I didn’t like how he already got the hang of my daily routine.
“What’s bothering you? Maybe your conscience?
Perhaps everything you’ve done to others is starting to wear you down? ”
I raised my chin, avoiding his question. “As if you’re the one to talk about sleeping. Why aren’t you sleeping?”
His smile vanished. “Isn’t the answer obvious?”
I tilted my head, waiting for him to reply.
“What you did to me didn’t scar me just physically. It scarred me mentally too. Insomnia is another one of the things I have you to thank for.”
I dropped my gaze, the same old guilt resurfacing from the corners within me where it always dwelled. My red nail polish on my toes shimmered under the illumination in the water.
“I’m sorry about that, Zach. I keep trying to tell you that—”
“I told you I don’t need your fake apologies.
” He stood and crossed over to me, stopping right behind me.
My muscles locked as he crouched and collected my hair with his hand, pushing it to one side of my shoulder as he brought his lips to my ear.
Goose bumps erupted all over my skin, my toes curling in the water.
“Tell me, why did you mess with me? Why did you mess with all those people like me?”
My teeth dug into my lip, my eyes shuttering closed.
I told myself not to be influenced by his nearness, but it was so hard.
His warm breath fell on my skin in soft caresses as he waited for me to answer.
He didn’t release his hold on my hair, and tingles spread across my skin from where his fingers touched my shoulder.
“Because I could. Because it gave me control. I felt it was better that I owned the world before the world owned me. Because everyone worships power, and exerting power over others taught everyone I was at the top of the food chain, and no one could mess with me.”
“That’s pathetic,” he said, but still, I could feel his lips moving closer to my ear.