Chapter 46 Beau
BEAU
“Damn, that sucks, bro,” Jace says as he inhales a sandwich.
Rhett, Mav, Jace, and I are sitting in Rhett’s living room while I try not to fucking hyperventilate. “Honey flipped out.”
Rhett nods. “Understandable. This is a shock, and I’m guessing it’s getting muddled with what happened to her mom since her parents just split up. Give her some time. She’ll come around.”
“I don’t know. She sounded like she didn’t think a paternity test would change anything.
Mel agreed to take one. We’re gonna do one of those non-invasive tests next week.
It’s gonna cost almost half my savings to expedite the damn thing, but I don’t want to wait.
Amnio costs less ’cause Mel’s insurance covers it, but it comes with more risks. ”
Paige brings us a tray of beer and sits on the arm of the couch. “I think I know why this is hitting Honey extra hard.”
“Why?”
She glances around at all of us and then motions to the kitchen. “I don’t think she’d want me to announce it.”
I follow her to the other side of the house, and she fiddles with a button on her sweater. When she doesn’t say anything, I sigh. “You’re killing me, Paige. Please tell me.”
“On Thanksgiving, she took a pregnancy test.”
“What?” I swear my heart feels like it might get drop-kicked out of my body.
“Bay and I suggested it because she’s been nauseated, but it was negative. Only… I get the impression that disappointed her. Like maybe Honey wanted to have a baby with you.”
I close my eyes. “This is so fucked. The woman I love and adore isn’t pregnant, while the girl I can’t seem to shake is the one who might have my kid.”
“Aww, you love and adore Honey?” She claps like her inner cheerleader is dying to jump out.
“Of course.”
She gives me a look. “Have you told her that?”
I rub the back of my neck. “It felt too early. I didn’t wanna spook her.”
“She’s not a damn horse, Beau. You could’ve told her. Maybe that’s what she needs to hear to see her through this situation.”
“But what if that paternity test proves I’m the father of Mel’s baby?” I shake my head. “Let me figure out what I’m dealing with first before I go making any declarations.” Because what if that only makes this situation harder for her?
Jace shouts from the other room, “Want me to write her a love song? You can sing it to her from her front lawn. You know, like how Maverick had to woo Baylee. Chicks love public declarations of love.”
“Thank you, oh wise one. Let’s hold off on the song.” Jace is the last person who should be doling out relationship advice.
When I rejoin my brothers in the living room, Mav elbows me. “I can spot you some cash if you need it.”
“Keep your money, bro, but I appreciate it. You have your own family to take care of.” He has a lot of responsibilities: his upcoming wedding, his new wife, little Leo, and Baylee’s mom, who now lives in their casita.
He was only in the NFL for one season, some of which he missed because of injury. Those funds won’t last him forever.
“Don’t be stubborn. Let me at least pay to expedite the test. I know you like to fly solo all the time, but I’d like to help. I’m sure Baylee would agree.”
Rhett nods. “Same here. Paige and I wanna pitch in.”
My throat tightens, and I suck in a breath. “If you’re sure.”
Jace jumps on me and puts me in a headlock. “What about me, bro? Can I help? I don’t have any cash, but I can babysit if the kid’s yours.”
I wrestle him to the ground and shove his face to the floor. “No one’s trusting you with a baby, doofus.” I stand up and dust myself off.
That night, I saddle up Prometheus and ride across our ranch. Across field after field. Into the dark night where not even the moon shows its face.
I think back to that day when Honey and I worked together. When she and I rode all afternoon.
Her sweet, light laughter rings in my ears, making my heart ache.
If I lose her, I’ll never forgive myself.
I can only hope that she gives me time to get the answers I need.
If I’ve fucked this up so royally that she won’t take me back, then I probably don’t deserve her.
And that’s a bitter pill to swallow.