Chapter A Few Weeks After Halloween #2
Kush rolled around on the laptop, happy as could be.
“Well, there go my plans.” I sighed heavily.
“Probably for the best, right?” I stroked his head and grabbed the blunt.
It remained between my lips as I carefully put my bra back on.
Kush stretched as best he could and yawned, pawing in my direction.
I smiled and inhaled, blowing the smoke in his direction.
“There you go.” He raised his head and pranced around in the smoke as he purred some more.
I shook my head and giggled, petting him again.
“No, that’s all you get. I swear, you’re a bigger stoner than me.
” Kush made the cutest noises as I stood and dropped the rest of my blunt into a nearby ashtray.
“Even bigger than Haze,” I whispered to myself.
Kush made some more noises, and I turned to look at the chunkster on the bed, rolling around.
I laughed softly to myself and walked over to him.
“Who’s a pretty kitty?” I scratched his round tummy, listening to his happy purrs.
He rolled around for a bit longer before jumping from the bed and over to the closet.
“What’re you—” He scratched at the door and meowed loudly.
My smile fell, knowing exactly what he was doing.
I miss him too.
The cat continued to meow, loudly, until the door to my room abruptly swung open.
“Jesus, Indi!” Mary-Jane’s loud voice filled the dark room as the light from the hall seeped inside.
“Can you please try to keep him quiet? The neighbors have complained enough.” She waved her hand, coughing faintly from the smoke that seeped from my bedroom.
“Fuck, could you lay off the weed? This whole room reeks like a fucking skunk!” She scrunched her nose as Kush meowed again and clawed at the closet.
“Seriously! Can you not fucking control him? I mean, he’s literally destroying my fucking apartment! ”
Her eyes looked me up and down, completely unbothered by my appearance. “Oh? I thought you gave up caming?” she asked with a raised brow.
I noticed she was all dolled up, dressed in a strapless red leather corset and black leather mini-skirt.
Her hair was styled in one of her usual grunge go-tos, half her hair spiked and pinned up with silver rings and loops hooped through, while the rest flowed freely down her back.
She was wearing a black coat with faux fur and knee-high leather boots, and I knew she was going out. Again.
Typical.
I tried to hold my discontent back. “Yeah, well, I have bills to pay.” I made a face.
Lots of fucking bills, thanks to you.
Mary-Jane rolled her eyes and moved her red lips. “Yeah, you do. And speaking of, your half of the rent is due.” She crossed her arms as if waiting for me to pay her.
I scoffed and reached for my phone, tapping along the glass screen.
“There.” I tapped a button and looked up at her.
Mary-Jane’s phone dinged and lit up. I watched as she held it to her face, the light igniting her devious little smile.
“My half is all paid up. We good?” I knew she could hear the discontent in my voice.
Ever since Halloween, I had grown to really fucking dislike Mary-Jane.
Sure, we weirdly stuck together after everything happened with Haze, but not because I liked her as a person.
I was more or less living in this long-term state of shock.
And she was the only person who even knew what I had gone through.
I didn’t exactly have other options. Over time, I had settled in my emotions, and the reality of my situation and what happened hit me.
I quickly realized she had taken me under the guise of friendship and bonding, but really, it was to help herself financially.
There was always something I had to pay, and the more I stayed with her, the more I realized how much I didn’t fucking like her.
And I’m pretty sure that feeling was mutual.
“Perfect.” Mary-Jane flipped her red hair, her eyes still glued to her phone, as if I wasn’t worth her full focus.
“I still can’t believe your brother let you mooch off him for so long.
I mean, you lived together for so many years.
And you never paid rent.” She scoffed while shaking her head.
“That’s excessive, Indi. Even for you.” Mary-Jane coughed and waved at the lingering smoke.
Her eyes lifted to meet mine. “You’re lucky I had a place for you to crash.
Who knows what would’ve happened to you.
I mean, your brother is a wanted murderer who killed your rich boyfriend. So tragic.”
My jaw tightened with anger as I tried to swallow my attitude. “Yeah, well, none of that matters, thanks to you, right?”
Mary-Jane looked back down at her phone. “True. I mean, you’re here, and Haze is…wherever the fuck he ran off to. You still don’t know where he is, right?” Kush meowed some more. “What is his fucking problem?” she rudely asked.
I ignored her question and walked over to Kush. I picked the fat cat up, straining as I held him. “He just misses Haze. We raised him together since he was a kitten, and they’ve never been separated. It’s an adjustment for him. It’s going to take some time before he’s okay.”
If ever.
I stroked Kush’s head and tried to hide my own longing. “It’s hard.”
For us both.
She scoffed loudly. “How can anyone miss that psycho?”
“Careful. That psycho is my brother,” I snarled.
Mary-Jane rolled her eyes and tsked. “Don’t remind me,” she mumbled.
“You’re better off without him, Indi. We all are.
Haze was nothing but trouble. It’s no wonder things ended up the way they did.
” She sighed. “The only thing he was really even remotely good at was baking.” Her eyes fell back to her phone, and I did everything in my power to keep my shit together.
“Wow, Mary-Jane.” I cocked my head. “I half expected you to at least compliment his fucking, but I guess you can’t really say that now, can you? You know, since he never really fucked you the way he did me.” I grinned. “How sad. You really missed out.”
Mary-Jane's entire body stiffened in shock at what I had just said aloud. She lowered her phone and looked straight at me. “Oh, Indi.” Her cheery expression returned. “Do you really think bragging about fucking your twin is going to make me jealous?” My smile fell. “As if. Besides, you don’t even know half the shit we did together. But how could you, he and I dated for years. He only fucked you once. Sounds more like your loss.”
My face burned. “Pretty sure the only thing you two did was use each other. You kept him distracted when all he really wanted was me. Just like Carter.” I stepped towards her.
“Tell me, how does it feel to be everyone’s last resort?
To know that no one actually chooses to be with you, and even after they’ve had a taste, they still want me.
” I tilted my head. “That must really suck.” I tried to hide my smile.
Mary-Jane’s entire demeanor shifted, and I could sense her anger. “You know what? You’re going to need to pay me for all the damage your fat cat’s caused.” She pointed to the closet with no emotion. “And try to lay off the drugs, Indi. You’re making the whole apartment stink.”
I lifted my phone, trying to keep myself composed. “How much,” I grumbled through my teeth.
Mary-Jane shrugged. “Call it an even five hundred. Same as that pet deposit you still owe me.”
Fucking bitch. At this rate, I’m never going to be able to afford my own fucking place.
I tapped around on my phone and sent her both payments, draining my dwindling savings. “There. Anything else?” I asked sarcastically. I half expected her to ask for more.
Mary-Jane’s lips curled as she checked her phone and played with her long, vibrant red hair.
“We’ll see.” She looked at her phone again.
“Ope, my ride is here. Try not to have too much fun tonight. I just know how wild your nights can get with your cat.” She made a face, and I knew she felt good about her dig.
She spun around and left the apartment, leaving me all alone. And feeling like shit.
I waited for her to leave before completely losing my shit.
“Uh! Fuck me!” I groaned. “Why the fuck did I ever think moving in with her was a good idea?” Kush watched me pace around the room as my anger grew.
“I’m so fucking sick of this! I’m sick of living here, sick of seeing her fucking face, and I’m sick of waiting for Haze to just show up!
” I plopped down at the foot of my bed in a huff.
My heart was racing, and I felt as if I couldn’t breathe.
Panic and anxiety flooded my veins as I sat there and drowned in all my emotions.
“What is wrong with me? How could I just walk away? Why did I just abandon him?” Kush stumbled over and rubbed against my legs as he purred. “I know. I just…I miss him.”
I sat there in my sullen moment for some time, realizing that no matter what, this was my life now.
I was condemned to this apartment—this room—and I fucking hated it.
I felt like all of my depressed emotions were swallowing me whole, sucking all the life out of me and leaving nothing but pain.
If I didn’t escape, even for a few minutes, I felt like I would die from heartbreak.
“I—I need to get out of here.” I rushed from my bed and grabbed a thin slip dress.
“I can’t live like this anymore.” I grabbed a pair of black leather boots.
“I need to get out of here. I need to breathe. I need to feel something…anything!” Kush jumped from the bed and returned to the closet door, clawing and scratching as he meowed.
I stood and walked over to the closet, knowing what was inside it.
I need my brother.