Chapter 12
Ember doesn’t understand why I’ve done this.
Taken away her freedom.
Locked her up in my tower.
Done things to her that I, myself, can’t even understand.
In the day she floats around our flat, she eats the food Cole cooks. She smiles softly at Phoenix when he brushes his knuckles against her cheek. Swats Flint away when he makes a rude joke, insinuates something sexual that makes her cheeks flush. And those bright blue eyes ringed in inky-sapphire track Cole whenever he leaves the room, walks away from her, her gaze boring into his broad back.
But it’s the nights.
Under the cover of darkness and depravity, she lies beside me, or under me, and I bury myself inside of her. I stare into the eyes that have haunted me and I hate myself as I fuck her. Because she looks at me with something like hatred and love tangled in razor wire and dripping poison. But it doesn’t stop me. It won’t. She’s burrowed her way beneath my skin since the day she was born. And until that night of her eighteenth birthday, I didn’t feel any sort of ways towards her, nothing except some sort of protective love, the kind that then quickly morphed into something else. Something darker.
Twisted and sick and obsessive.
I couldn’t stay away.
Watching, monitoring, waiting.
I knew then, even though there was no set plan, no discussion with my best friends, who are so much more than that, no blood or DNA shared between us, but brothers in every way that matters, that she had to be mine. Perhaps she always had been.
Bonfire Night.
The one night a year, boys who enjoy playing with pyrotechnics can run free, create chaos, face fire. It’s our night. Their night. I gave it to them. My gift in thanks. For everything they do for me. For us. They fuck and fight and kill, and I clean up the mess. That’s why, this year, it felt like the universe”s way of telling me we were always supposed to end up right here.
With my girl in the opposite corner of the L-shaped couch from me. Phoenix curled over her, his arms slowly tangling around her without her noticing until she was caught, she shifted uncomfortably, like he set her skin on fire, maybe ice shot down her spine. But all the same, those big blue eyes came to mine across the shadows of our dimly lit living room, curtains and blinds drawn at our backs, she sought me out through the gloom seeking permission. Checking. To make sure I wasn’t going to lunge across the three sofa cushions between us and strangle my best friend for touching her.
I wanted to.
But I didn’t.
Flint at their feet, his back resting in the corner joint of the couch, a spliff between his lips, two sets of legs draped over his shoulders. Nix’s went over his right automatically, but it took my adopted brother at least four attempts of grabbing Ember’s ankles and yanking her legs into place over his left before she finally gave in with a heavy sigh and left them there in defeat.
That’s how I know this will work.
I knew that Flint would want her just because I did. It’s some sort of sibling rivalry, he’s only a year and a bit younger than me, but the second he moved in with me and my parents we were brothers. Any woman I brought home, he wanted. Anything I showed interest in, he was suddenly interested in too. That’s why I didn’t try to hide Ember when she wandered into the wolf’s den.
I knew Cole would be pissed, Phoenix would be too busy with his dolls to be anywhere close to the house, and Flint, well, he’s always studying me. Less now that we’re older, having been brothers for years, but sometimes, just for shits and giggles, he likes to try and steal away my playthings. Like some sort of sexual kleptomaniac.
A film plays on the big screen TV, light flickering over the room, the pale grey walls, and light coloured furniture nothing more than obstacles in the dark. All of our family present except for Cole.
It’s been over two weeks; we’re nearing the end of November and there’s not been a single word said about Ember.
No missing person’s report, no campaign for the revered surgeon’s daughter. I’ve had my crew watching her house, movements to and from every property the family is associated with, and if anything, you’d think they hadn’t noticed their only daughter’s absence at all.
It makes me sick.
That family.
They don’t fucking deserve her, especially if they did to her what I suspect they did.
I don’t really deserve her either.
But I deserve her more than they do.
My family does.
She doesn’t realise it yet, but she’s already transitioning from captive to family member. That’s all I’ve ever wanted. It’s why, despite wanting her to myself, I must share. No other man or woman could come into this family with the grace and ease she possesses. And that’s just it, anyone else, any relationship outside of this family would tear us apart because these boys, men, they’re mine. I hold their leashes, I command them, they love me, and I love them, and I would die for any one of them, all of them. They would do the same for me. No one else would understand, but Ember would.
Does.
She doesn’t fully realise it yet, but she gets it.
She’s it for us.
Flint sees it.
Phoenix gets it.
I just need to find a way to get Cole aboard this train too.
He’s going to make this as difficult as it can be, and I understand why. He doesn’t trust anyone. He doesn’t want relationships. He’s barely living, existing on the outskirts, it’s where he’s put himself. I see him dying, and I’ve tried everything I can, but nothing’s helped. Ember, she could be his cure. Like I already know she’s going to be all of ours.
And we hers.
She needs us as much as we need her.
I don’t think there’s a redeemable bone inside of my body, but if redemption were ever something in my grasp, it’d be because she put it there. Dragged it close enough for me to find.
That’s what she is to me.
Everything.
I know this is going to be the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do, share her. It’ll take a while for the idea to really bed in, for me to not fly into a fit of rage at the thought of anyone else touching her. And I’ll probably fuck it all up before we get there. But I’m going to try.
For my family.
Ourfamily.
So, as I turn my head towards her, finding her already staring at me, I smile a little, not much more than a twist of my lips, but I know she sees it. And with a jerk of my chin, a single blink from her, she ducks beneath Nix’s arm, easing her legs out of Flint’s death grip, and crawls her way towards me like some sort of fucking sexual deviant, she just doesn’t realise what the fuck she does to me.
The way her arse bounces with the movement of her hips, knees depressing the couch cushions, hands out before her. Both other sets of eyes in the room swing in her direction, watching from behind, and I’m not mad about it. She’s fucking perfect.
She breathes in deep as she tucks herself into my side, my arm open for her to get close before I curl it possessively around her shoulders.
“You smell good,” she whispers lowly, almost like she didn’t mean for me to hear it.
She stiffens in my hold, her hands curled up beneath her chin, resting against my rapidly beating heart, her breath held as she waits.
I huff a laugh, my breath stirring her thick, blonde curls, “Yeah?”
Slowly, turning her face up towards me, my chin already dipped, ready and waiting, she swallows hard, exhaling with a small, embarrassed smile, “Yeah,” she nods.
And although I wanna kiss her, I feel him watching from the darkness of the corridor and decide instead to flick my gaze onto his hiding spot, let him know I’ve known he was there all along. Only to catch sight of Cole’s back as he walks away.