24. Maverick Carter
Chapter twenty-four
Maverick Carter
The last place I want to be is surrounded by my brothers right now. Don’t get me wrong, I love them, but I don’t want to be under a microscope tonight. I thought about dropping Evie off, then going back home to transfer all my feelings to my punching bag. But I knew if I canceled, they’d all drive to my house and demand to know what was wrong.
“You want the next game?” Adrian asks, holding out a pool cue. He just lost to Levi the way we all do every time we play him. It’s rare that he loses. His winning streak is ridiculously long, and usually I’d be all for trying my hand at breaking it, but not tonight.
“I’m good. I don’t feel like losing tonight.”
Adrian raises a brow but doesn’t comment. He hands the cue off to Grayson instead. Levi gives me a knowing look that I don’t like.
“You never turn down an opportunity to beat me. What’s going on? ”
“Nothing,” I say and lean against the wall nearby.
We’re all hanging out in our usual spot–Grayson’s basement. The whole thing has been converted into a man cave. There’s a huge TV with large recliners, every gaming console there is in the newest version, and a pool table that should look worse than it does considering how much we’ve played on it.
“I just don’t feel like playing. You win every time, so what’s the point?” I add, hoping he’ll drop it.
“I lost just last week at the pub against Dahlia,” Levi says.
Grayson laughs. “It’s not a fair game if you let her win.”
“I didn’t let her win,” he says, then smirks. “But she didn’t play fair either.”
Adrian sighs, leaning against the wall on the other side of the pool table. “I miss the days when we didn’t share about our personal lives so much.”
“Me too,” I mutter under my breath, but Grayson’s eyes flick over like he heard me.
“I for one love that we’re sharing. I say we go around talking about our week,” Grayson says with a grin. “I vote we start with Mav. He looks like he’s got something to get off his chest.”
I glare at him. “I do not. My week was fine. How about you share first?”
His eyes take on a maniacal gleam that lets me know I’ve made a grave mistake.
“I’d love to share. This week I helped Sloane with book research. We were determining how handcuffs would work in a kiss scene where one of her characters is held captive. I’m pleased to report–”
I cut him off. “Fine, fine , I’ll talk if you don’t say another word about your book research .”
Grayson smiles like he knows he’s won, because he has.
“Wait,” Levi says, looking to Grayson with wide eyes. “Does that mean Kiana is going to get kidnapped in the next book?”
“I cannot confirm nor deny your theory,” Grayson says, looking like he’s enjoying this way too much.
Sloane is actually Levi’s wife Dahlia’s favorite romance author. She recently started writing romantic suspense, and Levi has been reading them with Dahlia.
“But now I know that there are handcuffs and a captive! You spoiled the whole book for me. Now I’m going to have to read it with Dahlia and pretend I don’t know what’s happening.”
“I didn’t spoil the whole book. Besides, for all you know, our research–though highly productive–might not make it into the book. Now.” Grayson claps his hands and looks at me. “It’s Mav’s turn.”
I look at Adrian, the only one who might sympathize with my plight. He just shrugs. Great. The one brother who’s supposed to love privacy and hate anything close to sharing feelings has gone soft. On a normal day, I’d be happy for him. Today, I’m tempted to take one of the signed footballs Grayson has displayed on the wall beside me and throw it at his head. Then grab it and throw it at my other two brothers.
I groan and scrub my face with my hands. My beard scratches my palms. It’s grown out a little too much, but I haven’t had the energy to trim it. All of my energy has gone toward worrying about Evie.
“We know it’s about her, if that helps you get over sharing it with us,” Levi says.
Grayson and Adrian nod. Figures that Grayson would know without me telling him. He somehow manages to see everything even when he’s the center of attention .
“What if it has nothing to do with her?” I ask because I’m feeling ornery.
“Then you would have already told us,” Adrian says in a flat tone.
I sigh. “I don’t know what’s wrong. It feels like every time I take a step, she takes ten back. I’ll think we’re getting closer, that I’m making progress, and then she shuts down.”
Levi nods in understanding. “It’s hard when you’re ready but she’s not.”
“Yes, exactly,” I say, raking a hand through my hair. “I’m trying to be patient. She’s been through so much, but she won’t talk to me. We’ll have a moment where we get so close, even almost kiss, then she disappears for days.”
“I understand,” Levi says, and I’m sure he does in a way. When he saw Dahlia again for the first time after five years apart, he wanted to date her right then, but she wasn’t ready.
“What do I do?”
He sighs. “As much as you’re going to hate hearing this, you have to stay the course. A lot happened between me and Dahlia before she wanted to be with me again.”
“Yeah, he almost died,” Grayson says.
Levi rolls his eyes. “I didn’t almost die. I got shot in the shoulder.”
“You still got shot ,” Grayson says, then looks at me. “If you want, I can shoot you in the foot or something, speed things up for you.”
Adrian reaches out and whacks him on the back of the head. “ Ow !”
“Thank you,” I say to Adrian, who merely nods.
“As I was saying .” Levi’s voice is pointed. “Just keep doing what you’re doing. Let her know you’re there for her. She’ll come around soon enough.”
“And if she doesn’t?” I ask quietly.
“You move on,” Adrian answers. “Not everything is meant to be.”
Moving on from Evie would feel akin to walking on broken glass, but I know what he’s saying is true.
Grayson scrunches his face up. “That’s stupid. Of course they’re meant to be together, Mav’s been in love with her his whole life.”
“I have not,” I say and he sighs like I’m the exasperating one.
“I know you were with she who shall not be named for a while.” I give him a sharp look. “But it’s always been Evie. And if I’ve learned anything from my future wife, it’s that the it’s always been you trope never fails.”
“I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I hope you’re right,” I tell him.
“Don’t worry, I usually am.”
I turn the passenger seat warmer on for Evie while she puts Beckham in his car seat. As we get further into September, the temperatures at night are beginning to cool. I know Evie tends to get cold easily, so I’m sure she’ll appreciate a warm ride home.
“There you go, all set,” she says to Beckham before shutting the door.
I watch her walk through my headlights, before opening the passenger door and climbing in. Even in the dim lighting of my truck, she looks beautiful. Her long brown hair is down today, and I wish I had the privilege of being able to run my fingers through it. She tucks her hands into the sleeves of her pale blue sweater, confirming my suspicions about her being cold .
“Ready to head home?” I ask, still feeling the residual awkwardness of the past few days looming over us.
“I was ready to be home when we left it,” she says with a soft laugh.
“I felt the same way,” I tell her as I back out of MJ’s driveway.
She doesn’t say anything for a moment, and I wonder if that’s all I’ll get out of her tonight. It’s when we’re pulling onto the highway that she finally speaks up.
“I’m sorry if I made things weird,” she says.
“ You ? I’m the one who was walking around in nothing but a towel.”
A surprised laugh shoots out of her. “I guess that’s true, but I feel like I made everything weird. I don’t want that between us.”
“Me either,” I agree with her, placing emphasis on the words so she knows I mean it.
“So we can go back to being friends? Without all the awkwardness?”
“I didn’t think we ever stopped being friends?”
“Of course not, I just mean that we had that moment and–and well that’s it I guess.”
I glance over at her. She’s wringing her hands in her lap.
“And what, Wilder? What were you going to say?” I ask, because I can’t help it.
I’ve spent the past two days agonizing over what I did wrong to make her run away instead of kiss me. There were no interruptions, no baby monitors going off. We should have kissed right there beside my laundry room. I know she wanted to. It was written all over her face. Something happened when I leaned in though. Suddenly she was pushing me away and running off, leaving me freezing cold and confused. If I had to guess, it’s related to the pain Ezra caused, but I don’t know for sure. I wish I could have just a glimpse into her head.
“Nothing, there wasn’t anything. I just want to be friends, that’s all. I don’t like it when we don’t talk.”
“I want to be friends too. We are friends. That’s never going to change.”
It’s true, too. Even if we become something more, we’ll always have our friendship.
“I don’t want to lose you,” she whispers into the dark.
I reach over and take her hand. The slight tremor I feel in it breaks my heart. She’s scared. So, so scared. I wish I could take all of her fear away. The most I can do is reassure her, though.
“You can’t lose me, Wilder. No matter what. Don’t ever let yourself think otherwise. You can’t do anything that would make me leave. Okay?”
“Okay,” she answers, her voice sounding thick with emotion.
I hold her hand the rest of the way home, and she doesn’t pull away.