Always Been You
Raven
Liam had told Taylor and me to return to the party whilst he and Zack dealt with the body. Damon had gone off to see if there were any traces or anything left behind. Although we returned to the lively party with upbeat songs playing, I still felt glum.
So… you know about Zack and me, Taylor said through the link as he passed me a beer bottle. I looked at him and nodded.
Why haven’t you gone public or accepted the bond? I asked, unable to resist. Taylor looked pained; his eyes were fixed on a spot in the distance.
Zack doesn’t want anyone to know yet, he said he needs time.
Well, even I was surprised that they were mates, but now that I knew, I could just see how perfect they could be. I stepped up to Taylor and hugged him tightly.
I’m here if you need to talk. I know you have a lot going on, yet you’re still smiling.
Isn’t that what you do, too? He asked softly, looking down at me, concern clear in his eyes. My heart skipped a beat. I knew this was my chance to share my own problem, even if I usually kept it inside.
I do… but I don’t want to bother anyone. Besides, it’s nothing new, the same as you I guess… I found my mate, but thanks to certain issues, we can’t be together.
There I said it.
Oh, damn girl, I’m sorry, Taylor said apologetically. I shrugged.
It happened three years ago; I’m just thinking of rejecting them now.
Rejection will hurt, Taylor said, sounding pained.
But is staying in this deadlock any better?
Have you tried to work it out with them? Like, have you asked why he or she can’t accept it? Taylor asked gently.
I looked down at the bottle I held. Have I tried?
No, not even once... all I did was just run away and act like the victim. If those two idiots couldn’t talk, then wasn’t it my job to make them sit down?
I’ll take that as a no… Taylor said wryly.
Yeah…
I needed to sit down with them… I really had to do this, but how would I get them to? I guess that was a problem for another day.
“Well thanks, Taylor. Honestly, just that one question has got me thinking,” I said, giving him a small smile.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it like that.”
“I know, but you’re right. Well, I’m heading home. I’m moving to the packhouse tomorrow, so I want to finish my packing.”
“Damn, you’re moving? I never knew…”
“Yeah, I think I need my own place,”
“Well, I’ll help you with moving your stuff.”
“I will actually take you up on that offer,” I replied brightly. “Thanks!”
“I think I’ll head home too,” Taylor said. We looked around, everyone seemed to be having fun but since the murder, our hearts weren’t into it.
“When do you think they’ll announce it?” I asked quietly as we walked out into the woods.
“My guess is as good as yours,” he sighed deeply.
“Who can it be? Like, why would someone do something so twisted?” I mused.
“I know, I don’t get it. It’s weird.”
We fell silent, trudging through the pack grounds until we reached our homes. Or in my case, Dad’s house…
“What time tomorrow?” Taylor asked.
“After training?”
“Perfect, see you then.”
He gave me a salute before going over to his own house and I slowly went to the front door. Sadly, I didn’t have a key, but it wasn’t that late; it wasn’t even twelve yet. I did the door; I could see the living room light on, so hopefully, they’ll be in.
Mom, can you open the door?
No response. I knocked on the door. Still nothing.
Dad? I called through the link.
You found your way home, I’m surprised, his curt reply came.
That was the plan, nice and early, I chirped lightly. He didn’t reply but the door was pulled open. He stood there, clenching his jaw. I stepped inside, stopping when I saw the pile of luggage thrown at the bottom of the stairs.
“What is this…?”
That was my stuff.
“What does it look like? I saw you were planning on leaving, so I just thought I’d bring your stuff down... since you are in a rush to leave. Not once did you think to tell us?” He spat. I shut the door slowly, frowning deeply.
“Still, to go into my room and just take my stuff out?” I asked, looking at the suitcases, some that I hadn’t even packed, and a few extra black bags that had my stuff in them. My anger only began to rise when I saw my teddy bears and plushies just tossed in a pile at the bottom of the steps.
“My house, that bedroom that belongs to me. So, where are you going?” Dad asked, crossing his arms. I looked up at him and shook my head.
“I never should have even stepped into this house; that was my mistake. I don’t need to tell you where I’m going,” I said, about to go upstairs when Mom stopped me, placing a hand on my arm.
“I brought everything down. There’s nothing up there,” she said, pursing her lips. I frowned. So basically, they wanted me to leave ASAP?
Fine.
“Raven, are you going to tell me where you are moving to? Or should I say with whom?”
“Piss off,” I muttered, trying my best to stay calm, but the anger that was blazing within me was taking over.
“Excuse me? What the fuck did you just say?” Dad growled.
“I said, piss off! Or are you deaf? I have done nothing, Dad! Nothing but try my best to be a good daughter! I don’t even get why you hate me so fucking much!”
“Raven, don’t talk to your father like that,” Mom scolded lightly.
“Really, Mom? The one time I’m flipping speaking up for myself and you’re telling me to stop? If you even told Dad once to stop this behaviour of his, even once, I’d think you at least cared for me. But you never have, you always side him!”
“He’s my mate-”
“And I am your daughter!” I cried in frustration. How the hell can they be like this?”
“This is her appreciation for us, Kim, after everything we have fucking done for her.”
“Done for me? What have you done for me? Apart from telling me since I was a child how useless, annoying, and irritating I am,” I said. No matter how used to it I had become, it still hurt…
“You’re ungrateful! Despite being a disappointment, I kept you under this roof!”
“How am I a disappointment? Tell me!” I shouted, no longer caring to keep my voice down.
“If it wasn’t for you, my son would still be alive!” Dad hissed, making my blood run cold. What brother? “You are the harbinger of bad luck! Since you cast your shadow on this house, I have not seen one happy day!”
Brother? I couldn’t focus on Dad. I was confused, what brother?
“…useless, unwanted.... Just leave, I don’t want to see you here…”
I looked at Mom, who looked upset but I didn’t know what to make of it.
“What brother?” I asked.
“Like you need to know,” Dad spat.
So, he wasn’t going to discuss it, fine.
“Okay… don’t tell me. I’m out,” I said, grabbing the first of my two suitcases and carrying them out.
Dad picked up the next two and tossed them out. I heard something break, and with it, it felt like something inside of me was breaking. Mom just stood there whilst Dad was just raging with anger.
“I never knew I had a brother… and clearly you guys don’t want to tell me, so fine.
But I do want to say one thing before I go.
You said you lost your son because of me…
I’m sorry for that, even though I have no idea what I have done, but I hope you realise you are also losing the only child you do have,” I said quietly.
They were my parents at the end of the day, but I wondered, was there really not even one ounce of love in them for me?
“That won’t be much of a loss,” Dad spat, grabbing a few more of my items and throwing them out of the door. I moved out of the way just in time or I would have been hit by one of the suitcases.
“What the fuck?” A cold, dangerous voice spoke.
My heart thudded when I felt the huge aura behind me. His scent hit me hard, but more than that, the anger in his voice terrified me. Clearly not only me; Dad looked like he had just seen a ghost.
“A-Alpha Liam…”
“What the hell is happening?” Liam asked, his voice menacing, stepping forward as he looked at the bags strewn across the front yard.
“Raven’s apparently leaving, aren’t you?” Dad said, his voice not even holding an ounce of venom.
“Tomorrow. I was going to leave tomorrow but Dad decided to throw me out a day early,” I shot back icily. I didn’t care if his stupid reputation was ruined, I was so done with his fake ass.
“Care to explain, Mr Jacobs?” Liam asked. His voice was so cold that I shivered. His anger was something I was still not used to.
“It’s late, I am going to bed.” Dad started to turn away until a menacing growl ripped through Liam’s chest.
“I am your Alpha. Don’t you dare turn your back on me.”
Before I could even comprehend, he was before Dad in a flash, one hand around his throat as he slammed him up against the wall. Mom screamed and my hand clamped over my mouth.
“I… I’m sorry, but this was between my daughter and-” Funny he should call me daughter now…
“Liam, leave him,” I said quietly. He wasn’t worth it. Neither was this entire thing. I didn’t want others to come out of their houses for the drama. Liam’s hold tightened until I walked over to him, tugging at his jacket. “Leave him. Help me?” I asked quietly, motioning to the luggage.
His eyes, that were burning a deep magnetic blue, glared at Dad one final time before he shoved him to the ground roughly.
“This isn’t over,” he said, and something told me he wouldn’t drop it, not until he had gotten to the bottom of it.
He turned to me, his eyes dipping to my legs, before he looked away and grabbed a few of the bags. Wow, how much can he carry? Okay, I think we’d be able to manage alone. I grabbed what I could as Liam picked up the final one, walking off towards the packhouse without another word.
Go be a whore, Dad’s final words came through the link.
I won’t react. I’ll just walk away, like I always do…
When will I stop and actually speak up?
“Here’s the room… I’m next door,” Liam said curtly, making my heart hammer. He looked down at me, raising an eyebrow. “It wasn’t planned.”
“I didn’t say it was,” I said when he unlocked the door and picked up the bags. A few were in the hall downstairs as we hadn’t managed to carry them all up the stairs in one go. The packhouse was empty, as everyone still seemed to be out partying. “Good,” I said, looking inside the room.
Boy, did this room need a personal touch. Well, fear not; I had plenty of stickers, plushies, and posters to decorate the place!
“If you want anything done, I’ll get the boys to do it tomorrow,” Liam said, his husky, sexy voice making my stomach flutter.
I glanced at him to see him leaning against the doorframe, his arms crossed over his chest, his jacket straining against his huge, bulky muscles, and his intense gaze burning into me.
“I can do everything myself,” I said, slipping my hands into the back pockets of my shorts as I swivelled around on my heel and stared around at the white wall.
“I’ll get someone to get some black paint…”
“Who said I like black?” I asked lightly, despite how my heart was thumping. He raised an eyebrow.
“Don’t you? Black and purple are your favourite colours, aren’t they?”
“Mmm…” I said, trying not to look at him. Why was it so stuffy in here? His eyes were burning into me.
“I’ll go get your bags,” he said, turning and walking out.
I sighed, looking around the room. This was it, my new home… a home that meant having Liam around often… we needed to talk. All three of us…
His footsteps and his intoxicating scent returned as he placed the stuff down just as I drew the blinds, scanning the room. It was a good size, bigger than my room at Mom and Dad’s house.
“What is up with you and your dad? Did something happen?” He asked, and I could sense the anger in his voice…
“No, nothing at all. Dad was just being Dad,” I said lightly. The same way he’s been for the last twenty years of my life. “Liam… can I ask a favour?” I asked quietly, turning back to him.
“Sure,” he said, shoving his hands into his pockets.
I walked over to him, my heart thumping as his eyes trailed over me. Don’t look at me like that… like I mean so much to you when I don’t…
I hated how my core throbbed under his gaze, the way my heart was pounding and the urge to be in his arms consumed me.
“Can we talk? Like a proper talk. You, Damon, and me? Please?” I asked softly, stopping a foot away from him. As predicted, his eyes darkened, and he clenched his jaw. “Please?” I said softly, stepping closer.
I placed a hand on his chest, my stomach knotting at the sparks that coursed through me. I had heard of the power of a touch... I had also seen it first-hand with Uncle El and Aunty Red, then again with Kia and her Al.
“What’s there to talk about?” He asked quietly.
“Us. We can’t carry on like this. I can’t deal with this forever. We need to talk, tell each other what our issues are and find a solution,” I said quietly. I wasn’t sure if it was the alcohol in my system or what Taylor had said, but I needed to do this.
“My issue? My issue is that I am not fucking enough! I would love you so fucking much that you wouldn’t need another… is Selene trying to say I alone am not enough?”
Sadness and pain washed through me. I could see the pain in his eyes. He removed his hands from his pockets and gripped my waist, making me gasp. My heart thudded as I placed my hands over his, but it was his next words that threw me off completely.
“Tell me, Bite-size, wouldn’t my love be enough?
I know I’ve done nothing to prove myself for the last three years, but I’ve always loved you.
Even now, no matter how much I fucking hate our situation, I do love you.
I left before I did something I regretted.
This is not my fucking justification, but I loved you before I even knew what the fucking feeling was…
I’ve always wanted you, Raven, no one else, just you. It has always been you.”