Chapter 37
MILA
It hurts the way he talks to me. With disgust.
I need to think fast so I can get the fuck out of here.
He can see through me, I know that. He might have known me as Melissa, but he saw the real Mila.
His cock presses against my ass and I use that to my advantage by circling my hips. The pressure of the blade against my throat is a cruel reminder of just how much has changed between us.
I swallow hard. This is a huge risk.
I’ve never seen a man with such fury in his eyes.
As he pushes my face harder against the tree, the rough bark digs deeper into my cheek.
“Is this how you want to play it? Hmm? You think you can put me under your spell with your pussy to make me forget your betrayal?”
As the blade slides along my throat, I can feel its cold touch, and he places it with precision under my jaw.
“I thought you wanted me bad, Nikolai? Well, you got it.” With each beat of my heart, a thunderous sound resonates in my eardrums.
“I hate you, d’yavolitsa.” he spits out and I believe him.
His cock hardens against my ass and that sparks a glimpse of hope. Not all is lost.
I close my eyes as he leans in, his lips brushing against my neck, his hot breath beating against my skin. “If this is what hate feels like, then hate me harder.”
My heart skips as he drives the knife into the trunk, the sound of the impact echoing through the air. In a single, fluid motion, he pulls down my leggings, and the contrast between the icy air and my burning flesh creates a tantalizing sensation.
“You have no idea what you’ve just done.”
As he spins me around, his hands clench tightly around my throat, the pressure intensifying as I’m held captive against the sturdy embrace of the tree.
And shit, I’m so turned on.
He snatches the ice hanging off the branch, and it snaps loudly, breaking the silence. The sight of blood dripping from his hand, as he holds the weapon makes me clench my thighs together.
I let out a whimper when he kicks open my legs wider.
“Let’s see how you like the cold, shall we? Seeing as you’re the queen of ice.”
With each passing second, his fingers dig into my throat, making it harder to breathe. Darkness flashes across his eyes, but I’m not scared.
Deep down, somewhere, he wants me. Otherwise, I would be dead. He rips open my jacket, exposing my bare stomach.
He slides the ice between my breasts with a smirk as his hand moves lower. I let out a hiss as the chill of it meets the warmth of my skin, dragging along the sensitive area of my thigh.
“Cold enough for you?” he growls.
Loosening his grip, I open my legs wider out of instinct.
My head almost spins as he tosses me down into the snow. Before I can even blink he’s on top of me, his strong arms on either side of my head, positioned between my knees.
“I’ll take what I want and I’ll leave you shattered into a million pieces. It’s only fair. You break my heart, I’ll break your soul,” he whispers against my lips.
What he doesn’t realize, I’d give it to him. As soon as I have my brother, whatever happens to me doesn’t matter.
I’ve spent my life fighting to survive. I’m exhausted.
I don’t matter. I am no one.
“Break me,” I reply confidently.
“Don’t tell me what to do. You aren’t in a position to make orders.”
With a biting grip, he lifts my hips and forcefully tears off my panties. Then he covers my mouth and nose, cutting off my breath.
“I don’t want to hear you.”
Leaving his hand there, he works himself lower down my body. The warm blood dripping between his fingers lands on my lips.
My gasp is muffled as he lightly drags the ice along my slit.
“It’s funny, what can bring pain can also bring pleasure. Very much like us, isn’t it? Except when you tip the balance, everything falls apart.”
He follows the chill with the flat of his warm tongue.
Fuck.
I wiggle my hips, the sting from the snow on my ass cutting into my skin. He repeats the movement, circling the ice on my clit and I want to scream when his hot mouth connects.
Over and over.
“So fucking needy. I bet it’s torture, isn’t it?”
I can hear the amusement in his tone.
Every lick takes my breath away.
My legs start to tremble, and he slams my thigh down against the ground.
“You don’t get to come,” he growls. “This isn’t about you.”
His freezing hands push up under my sports bra and he cups my breast and squeezes. His mouth finds my clit and he sucks.
I want to scream, I want to tell him I need more, but this is wrong.
When he releases his hand, I gasp for air, my head going dizzy from the constant switch in temperatures.
As he clambers up my body, he pins my arms above my head with one hand, using the other to free his cock.
“Is this what you wanted? To be fucked like a whore before you die?”
I shake my head. When he sinks two fingers inside me, I let out a scream. As he rams the same fingers inside my mouth, I bite down as hard as I can, meeting his furious gaze.
“I’d say your pussy gives you away, it’s begging for me to fuck you. Tell me I’m wrong.”
He grips my cheeks, forcing me to look at him. He isn’t.
“Try it and find out, Nikolai. I’ve killed bigger men than you for less.”
His eyes narrow and he shakes his head. “You don’t deserve my cock.”
He lets me go and my head drops to the ground.
He zips himself up and stands. The next thing I know, I’m staring into the barrel of his gun. Nausea washes over me. I have to save myself to rescue my brother.
“You should have killed me, Mila.”
I wince at the way he says my name.
I hate this.
Anger bubbles inside me. I was doing my job. I’m doing this for my brother. I’ll do anything for him. Nikolai should be grateful to me for looking out for his daughter, and for saving his ass from the Reapers.
He needs to see the real woman he’s fucking with. The woman who will stop at nothing to protect her family.
“I could have. But, I chose not to,” I say flatly. Scrambling to my feet, I do my best to keep him in my sights. I wipe my cheek and glance at the blood on my fingers before looking at Nikolai.
Just because he let me stand, doesn’t mean he’s letting me go. But, I have a job to do, and that means I have to get out of here.
He tilts his head, running a hand over his jaw. As he takes a step forward, I take a deliberate one away. And again.
Right to where I need to be.
“Why didn’t you, huh? You’re not as good as you think you are?”
My hands clench, how dare he?
“You know nothing about me,” I spit out.
He chuckles. “Oh, I know. Trust me. One day, you’ll just be a distant nightmare.”
Ouch.
“I never meant to hurt you. I’m sorry, Niki.”
His jaw ticks.
“Don’t fucking lie to my face. You’re working for my father. You could have hurt my daughter. You deserve everything coming to you.”
And that tips my fury over the edge.
“You think you know everything, don’t you? You don’t have a clue about the real world, Mr. Volkov. I would never hurt Elena. Why do you think I killed her bitch of a nanny, that you failed to see was emotionally abusing your own daughter?”
His nostrils flare and he closes the distance between us.
“Fuck you, Niki. I didn’t break your heart. You don’t have one.”
He scoffs, gripping my cheeks.
“Coming from you.”
I push against his chest but the beast doesn’t move an inch.
“Why do you think I didn’t kill you?”
“Because you couldn’t. Even if you tried.”
I let out a laugh and his fingers dig into my cheek.
“Wrong. Because I fucking love you, Nikolai. That’s why you are still alive. Love.”
I am almost as shocked as he is at my outburst. That is the only explanation for my behavior. For what I let him get away with.
The silence stretches out between us, broken by the gentle rustling of the breeze through the branches.
His features are a stone mask.
My heart sinks as he releases his grip and steps back.
“So you lie to and betray the ones you care about?”
Tears start to pool in my eyes and I shake my head. “No. I do it for the ones I love. You should understand that.”
Maybe one day, once my brother is safe, he will believe me.
I can see the confusion etched on his face. I’ve thrown him. And this is his weakness and my opportunity.
I swiftly turn around, yank the knife out of the tree, and thrust it directly into his thigh. I know what I’m doing, so I miss anything important.
He lets out a groan, and his face turns red. He raises his arm, pointing the gun at me. His finger is on the trigger, making the blood drain from me. I step toward him with purpose. If anyone deep down can understand me, it’s him.
“You’re the one person in this world I would let willingly end my life. Just not now. Let me do what needs to be done, then I am yours… whatever you decide.”
His head drops and I take my opportunity. I run. As fast as I can until my lungs burn.