Chapter Eighteen
The Caged
My head is throbbing, that’s the first thing I notice when I awake. My mouth tastes like blood, my ears muffled. I try to open my eyes, but I am met with darkness, my eyelashes rubbing against something rough, like cloth.
“Tobias?” I whisper, my voice barely above a croak as my dry throat protests the act.
I hear rustling around me, as if someone is moving things around, but I can’t see.
A sharp inhale of ragged breath leaves my mouth as I feel something slide down my arm, something sharp.
“Tobias?” I call out again. My voice echoes and I know exactly where I am. He’s brought me to the dungeon.
“You couldn’t protect our son.” I scream as the thin blade cuts through tendon and bone, the spikes catching on sinew and muscle. My back arches as I fight against the restraints. It’s been so long since I’ve been down here. So long since he’s tortured me like this.
“Tobias, please!” I beg, my voice cracking.
“What good are you if you can’t protect our child?
You failed!” I scream again as I feel the blade hit bone.
My head is spinning, I feel like I am falling.
I bite my lip, drawing blood. “You failed as a mother. You failed as a wife. You failed as a queen !” The blade disappears and then I feel his hand slide in my hair, fisting around the crown sewn in place.
He pulls on it, ripping at my scalp. I can feel the strands breaking, feel the permanent stitches slicing through the delicate skin.
I don’t fight the scream as it feels like my head is being cleaved in two.
“I’m sorry! I am so sorry.” I stammer out, sobs wreaking havoc on my body. I knew this would happen. I knew he would blame me.
“I don’t believe you.” His voice is close to my ear, I can feel his breath against my cheek, smell the whiskey he must have drunk.
“Things were better, they were better. I don’t understand.” I whimper as the pressure is released.His footsteps dissipate slightly, and I can hear him toss the blade he was using on the table, the metal clinking against the other instruments.
“They were, Ela, but you ruined that. You let our son, our only child, be taken by the gods only know who. Were you being reckless? Purposefully endangering our son?” Silence fills the room, the only noise my ragged breathing.
“Answer me!” He snaps and I hear his hands slam down on the table, sending blades flying to the ground.
“No, I-I didn’t stand a chance. Please, Tobias. I never saw it coming. I-I never saw it coming!”
“Now you won’t see for a while.” My pulse skips. I wait for pain, I wait for anything, but nothing happens. My hands tremble as I strain my ears, trying to listen.
“What do you mean?” It’s quiet, my voice echoing around me. “Tobias?” He’s gone.
My hands pull at the restraints, the metal digging into my wrists.
I pull and push in every direction trying to slip free, but they don’t budge.
I slide my head down, attempting to catch the blindfold on something, anything, that might help me slide it off.
I don’t know how long I work, but it doesn’t move an inch.
My neck is cramping, my wrists and ankles burning.
I can still feel the icy air brushing up against my open wounds.
Every time I take a breath, it feels as if my arm is going to fall off.
Tears soak into the material as I relax. There is nothing I can do. I’m stuck.
I hear shuffling around me, someone walking towards me slowly. “Who’s there?” I whisper. Rough fingers graze my cheek, then I feel hot breath in my ear.
“Guess who?” His voice is deep, and I know it is Davel who is standing next to me.His rancid breath makes me gag and I turn away from him.
“Don’t.” I warn. His hand fists in my hair and yanks, exposing my neck and keeping me still. His lips are warm as they press onto my skin, his tongue flicking out to gather one of the tears dripping down my jaw.
“You always smell so good after he’s done with you.
” I try to pull my head out of his hands, but he holds tight.
His lips leave my neck, and I can hear his belt being undone.
I can’t go through this again. His hand slips from my hair and he’s silent for a second.
My pulse skips, my breath coming in short pants.
I can hear my blood dripping off the table and onto the stone floor.
My head is spinning, from pain and from blood loss. I won’t survive this.
“Please, don’t do this.” I beg.It’s pointless. There is nothing I can do to stop him. Nothing I can do to save myself.
“You almost got me killed, whore. I have been in these dungeons for weeks because you couldn’t keep your mouth shut. You owe me.” My ears strain, trying to ascertain where he is. His fingers brush my leg and then I can feel him climb onto the stone slab, on top of me.
My arms pull at the chains holding me down. I can feel my muscles straining, not wanting to cooperate. His fingers slide down my bare abdomen before thrusting into me. I scream out, bucking off the table as much as possible. He rips his fingers out before settling over me.
“Stop!” I scream as his hand finds my neck, squeezing until no oxygen can make its way through.
I gasp against the feel, searching for any tiny stream of air to inhale.
His other hand finds my hip and lifts me up before thrusting himself inside of me.
I scream out at the burning, blinding intensity.
I keep screaming as he pounds into me over and over again.
“Don’t stop screaming, whore. I like it when you fight.
” His voice is rough, breathy as he picks up his pace.
My screams grow hoarse before turning into sobs.
I can feel his legs shaking, his sweat dripping onto my naked skin.
I can feel as he empties inside of me, pouring himself into me while simultaneously draining me of every ounce of sanity I have left.
Iwon’t survive this.
The days and nights are long. I don’t know how many days I have been in here, strapped to this table.
There seems to be a rotation of who uses my body any way they wish.
Davel, random guards whose names I can’t remember, even silent men who make no noise that I can use to identify them.
I used to scream, used to cry, but after the third guard emptied himself inside of me, I stopped.
I hear his voice sometimes. Theo’s. I hear him telling me to hold on, hear him telling me he loves me. I know it’s not real, but it’s the only thing keeping me sane. Keeping me from descending into madness.
Tobias visits often. He slices into me, rapes me, and then knocks me out.
I always wake up without wounds, without pain.
All for it to start again. It happens too fast. Too fast to be poppy root.
I can’t figure out how it is he controls the speed in which I heal, only that it’s consistent. I fall asleep, I wake up healed.
It’s the same every time.
What if he can’t heal me one day? What if whatever magical medicine he is using stops working ?
I’m going to die down here.
I hope I die down here.
Something slams into my stomach, knocking the wind out of me. Hands come around my neck, cutting off my oxygen. I try to claw at arms and the person’s face, but the chains don’t allow it.I still can’t see, the blindfold a permanent fixture.
“ Whore .” He sneers as he suffocates me. Blood pools in my mouth and I fight to inhale as much as I can, but nothing breaks through. My body is on fire, as if lightning is shooting through my limbs, burning through every vessel and artery.
Burning through every remaining piece of my sanity.
Suddenly I can see it, amethyst and emerald. An odd combination. The lightest purple and the brightest green, calling me home.