Chapter 8
CAM
What the actual fuck? That was what I thought on the drive from Taylor’s house to mine. She was quiet. I couldn’t resist peeking at her out of the corner of my eye about every thirty seconds. She stared out the passenger window, her fingers tucked into the long sleeves of her sweatshirt.
A sweatshirt that didn’t hide the fact that she wasn’t wearing a bra.
In the cab of my truck, her sweet, fruity scent was potent. Her hair was damp, as if she’d just showered, and I wondered if it was her shampoo.
That shit in her house had been fucked up. Her dad… Jesus. My blood was simmering with the need to go back and beat the shit out of the guy. Point out what a father’s job really was. End him for even hurting my little red for even one second.
But that wasn’t what Taylor needed right now. I had to be what she needed and I’d prove it by words and actions. I’d build her trust in a way that was real. That was honest.
“He ever hurt you?” I asked finally. I had to unclench my jaw to get the words out. Because if she said yes, then I was turning around and giving him a world of hurt. I didn’t give a shit that my brother was the sheriff.
She jumped at my question and then a sigh escaped.
“No. Tonight was… more. Usually he yells. A lot.”
“Yells?”
She glanced my way, then out the window again. There wasn’t anything to see since it was late.
“Tells me to make him dinner. Wonders why I never washed a shirt of his. Tells me I can’t do anything right. That I’m worthless. A waste of space. Different days, different shit.”
I gripped the steering wheel so hard it was a surprise it didn’t crack.
“Red, you are not worthless.”
“Yeah, well, if I remember correctly, you told me to get out of your sight. I wasn’t even worth looking at.
” She sighed again and with every word, her voice got even more dejected.
“Look, Cam, the Sip N’ Serv’s open still.
Just drop me off there, okay. You’ve done your good deed for the night, especially since you hate me so much. ”
I deserved that. Every word. But she wasn’t saying any of it to be malicious or make me feel like shit.
I did that to myself. She was saying it because she believed it.
Of course, I validated the emotional wounds her father inflicted on her on a daily basis.
If her mother died when she was six, then that had been maybe fifteen years of assholery on his part.
Which made me just like him.
I used my blinker and pulled off the road, put the truck in park so I could turn to face her. The only light came from my dash. She looked to me, her eyes wide, but filled with hurt.
She wanted me to drop her at the diner to… spare me?
“I have never been more wrong about anything in my life than what I said to you in the stable earlier. You are not the reason my father got hurt at the rodeo. You are not at fault. No one in my family blames you or is mad at you. In fact, the only person they’re mad at right now is me.”
“Cam–”
“No. I want you to hear this and then if you want to be rid of me, I’ll take you to the diner or a friend’s or wherever the hell you want to go.
But I want, no need, you to come home with me.
Because you’re mine. I knew it the second I saw you with your friends at The Roadside.
Knew it when you approached my table all nervous and bold at the same time.
When I heard your voice for the first time.
Breathed in your scent. Tasted you. Took your fucking cherry as you came. ”
My voice got more potent as I spoke. I had to make her see that I’d been wrong and I’d spend my life proving to her that I’d been a dumbass.
I couldn’t tell in the dark, but I’d bet my left nut she was blushing.
“My dad is fine,” I continued. “He’s gonna be fine. But I obviously have some lingering… anger about him getting hurt.”
“I don’t blame you. For any of it. It is my–”
“Don’t finish that sentence, red. It’s not your fault.”
A tear slid down her cheek. Fuck me, this was my fault.
I pulled her across the center console so she sat sideways in my lap. Her calves were across the console because there wasn’t that much room.
“Cam! What are you doing?”
Reaching up, I gently swiped the tear away with my thumb. “Repeat after me.”
“What?”
“It’s not my fault.” When she didn’t do as I said, I added, “Say it.”
“It’s not my fault,” she whispered.
“That’s right, red. It’s not your fault. You dated an asshole. Say it.”
“I dated an asshole.”
An asshole who she clearly didn’t fuck.
“Cam Wilder is a dumbass,” I said next.
The corner of her mouth twitched up.
“Cam Wilder is a dumbass.”
I grunted.
“I’m sorry. So fucking sorry for tossing those hurtful words at you. I want you to know I will never, ever, ever speak to you like that again.”
She nodded. “That’s a lot for me to repeat.”
I huffed. “Then repeat this: Cam is going to take care of me from now on.”
Her mouth opened and her gaze flew up to meet mine. I waited, pretty much held my breath for her to make the decision about belonging to me. Had she really been right there with me that night at the bar? Had she felt the same way? Had she run off because she was protecting me from herself?
Her, a pint-sized handful of lush curves and sweetness, trying to do what she thought was best for me, a big, gruff–dumb–cowboy?
This was the moment. Right now. My little red was debating whether to have me in her life or not. Just like she had been selfless trying to protect me, I’d be selfless and let her walk if it meant protecting herself from me.
No. That was never gonna happen. She was mine and I’d be patient and woo her. Date her. Take my time and make her see that I was it for her.
“Cam is going to take care of me from now on,” she whispered as she lifted her head to look me in the eye.
Or she could say that and move the rest of our life together along. FUCK YES.
“That’s my red,” I whispered, then cupped her cheek and kissed her.
When she gasped, my tongue found hers. Her hands settled on my biceps, her fingers curling around the cotton of my shirt.
We kissed and kissed in my truck like horny teenagers with no other place to go. But I was thirty-two and had a house of my own. A big bed. Privacy.
“Time to go home.” I stroked her silky, slightly damp hair. “Gonna make you mine for the first time in my bed. Our bed.”
“Yes, Cam. Hurry.”