Chapter 26 #2
“Let me rectify that.” He stood and pulled off his waistcoat, then his shirt. It was strangely erotic to have her lie there and watch him, her eyes following his every move.
He stood naked before her and let her gaze wash over him as his had done to her. It was so exciting that his breathing felt labored.
She held out her arms to him. “Come to me.”
Released from the strange paralysis of her gaze, he climbed on top of her and groaned at the feel of her skin against his. He pressed his aching cock into her thigh in the hopes of alleviating some of the pain, but that only intensified it, and he groaned again.
She reached between them and took his cock in her hand, gently squeezing, causing him to gasp and the room to dim.
“Oh, God, yes,” he moaned, his eyes drifting shut as her fingers squeezed and then released. He pumped into her hand, unable to stop himself, but after a moment she stopped and he dropped his head to her shoulder, breathing deeply. If he wasn’t careful, this was going to end before it even began.
He rolled to her side and propped himself up on his elbow to keep temptation at bay. She turned her head to look at him, her expression still serious, but there was an answering need in her eyes.
He fingered the curls at the juncture of her thighs, lightly brushing his hand across them.
She opened her legs. He was far past teasing or playing.
He took the invitation for what it was and parted her folds to press his finger against the nub inside.
She gasped and raised her hips, pushing against his finger.
He slid another finger into her passage while moving his thumb across her nub.
Her eyes drifted shut and her hips moved with his finger, slowly at first. He was hard and aching, but he watched her expressions, fascinated.
She pressed her palm against the back of his hand, forcing his finger to rub harder as she emitted an approving hum.
Her hips thrust upward, forcing his finger deeper inside of her.
She moved faster, and a small line formed between her drawn brows.
She began to pant, her hips coming off the bed, causing the bed ropes to squeak in protest. He could only watch in rapt enthrallment as, pressing hard on his hand, she cried out.
Instantly, his fingers were wet with her juices and her passageway pulsed around his finger.
She lowered her hips and thrust up again, harder this time.
Her toes curled, her legs went rigid, and her hips bucked.
When the pulsing slowed, she lazily opened her eyes and smiled at him. Her cheeks were flushed and her eyes shone. The back of her hand skimmed the head of his penis and he nearly came undone.
Gently, she tugged on his arm and he rolled on top of her, sheathing himself. For a long moment he lay still, luxuriating in the tight, warm feel of her. But then she moved, squeezing her inner muscles.
“Ahhh,” he groaned, his body clenching to stave off his release.
“Don’t stop,” she whispered. “Don’t hold back.”
His brows cocked, he looked down on her in question. “Are you certain, lass?”
“Please,” she said.
He moved inside her. She clenched his buttocks with both hands, forcing him deeper, setting a swift rhythm that was hard to deny. “Don’t stop,” she repeated.
He continued to pump into her, not slowing.
His completion was coming too quickly, but he knew she didn’t want him to stop, so he didn’t.
It rushed up on him, overcoming him before he knew it, and all at once he was spurting inside her, his release so powerful that goosebumps rose on the backs of his legs.
He’d been afraid that it was over so quickly she wouldn’t find her release, but he’d been wrong.
She’d come just as quickly, crying out as she went stiff underneath him.
—
“Don’t go,” he mumbled, pulling her tighter against him.
“I don’t want to, but the entire house doesn’t need to know I’ve been in yer bed.
” She resisted the urge to snuggle against him.
She must be strong in this. She didn’t want to be known as Iain’s lover or mistress.
She’d worked hard to lead a quiet life free of drama and rumors, and she wanted to keep it that way.
With great reluctance, she slid out of bed and reached for her shift while Iain sighed and scooted up in bed to pull the sheet over his lap. “What does it matter if people know? Are you ashamed of us?”
She paused as she pulled on her robe. “I’m no’ ashamed.”
“But neither are you proud.” He was watching her with his dark eyes, and she found it disconcerting. “Your silence tells me all I need to know.”
“It has nothing to do with pride. I like my independence, and I like being left alone.”
“I want more, Cait.”
She sighed, wishing this weren’t the conversation he chose to have.
She was drained from her breakdown earlier in the evening, and even though she’d slept while Iain was gone, this was a bone-deep weariness.
She’d cried until she’d had no more tears left, and it had been cathartic, releasing all of her anger, but now her mind was fuzzy and she felt as if she could sleep for another three days.
She also needed time alone. There was much she had to think about; much had come to the surface that she’d pushed away for far too long.
Against her better judgment, she sat on the side of the bed and folded her hands in her lap. “I don’t know what I want, Iain. I like this.” She waved her hand between the two of them. “But I’m no’…I don’t know if I’m right in the head at the moment.”
He took her hand. “Don’t say that. Of course you’re right in the head. You’ve had a lot happen to you over the past few years, and you’ve never dealt with it.”
“Maybe ye’re right. But I need to deal with it. I need to think about all of this, and I can’t do that when I’m with ye. Ye make me want to believe that everything will be okay.”
“Maybe not okay, but certainly better.” His grin was lopsided and a bit uncertain.
She smiled back. “I’ve been by myself so long that sometimes, if I’m around people for too long, I get anxious. I need space, and I need my time alone.”
His jaw flexed, and she knew she’d hurt his feelings, but she wanted to be completely honest with him.
“Don’t be angry,” she said.
“I’m not angry. I’m frustrated.”
“I’m sorry I frustrate ye, but I think ye’re frustrated because I won’t follow yer commands like everyone else does.”
“I’m not commanding you.”
“Aren’t ye?”
He pressed his lips together and she sighed. Though she didn’t want their night to end like this, Iain was pressuring her, demanding more than she was willing to give at the moment.
“I care about you, Cait.”
She leaned over to kiss him on the cheek. “I know ye do, and I care about ye as well. But Iain, ye can’t be angry at me for being who I am.”
“I’m not angry at you, I’m—”
“Frustrated. I know.”
She stood and looked down on him, wanting nothing more than to crawl back into bed with him, but she resisted. Her reasons were convoluted, and even she didn’t understand the half of them. All she knew was that something was holding her back.
He snatched her hand. “How are you?”
She raised a brow.
“About Donaldson. How are you feeling about that?”
“I’m fine.” When she smiled, even she knew it was a brittle smile.
“You’re not.”
“I will be.”
He looked skeptical and she leaned over to kiss his cheek. “I will be thanks to ye. Thank ye, Iain, for everything ye’ve done for me.”
“I’d do anything for you, Cait.”
She smiled and touched his cheek before straightening. “Sleep well.”
It had been an exhausting, emotional day. Coupled with making love to Iain, everything was jumbled inside her. She was angry at herself for letting a man like Donaldson control her.
But wasn’t she also letting her fear of a relationship with Iain control her?
Did she really have any control over any of it?