Chapter 20
TWENTY
The Grindhouse—the campus coffee shop—was packed with stressed-out students cramming for finals, but Ava and I had managed to snag a table in the back corner. Our Consumer Behavior textbooks were open between us, and highlighters and notecards were scattered across the surface.
I’d avoided being alone with her the past three weeks.
Not because I didn’t want to have sex again.
But because I wanted it too much.
It wasn’t supposed to be like this. But while she seemed totally unaffected, sitting across from me, chewing on the end of her pen and frowning at a practice question, all I could think about was the smell of her shampoo, and remember what it felt like to be buried inside her in the library stacks.
One time.
We’d only had sex once.
And she’d fucking messed with my head more than anyone I’d ever been with.
“This one’s bullshit,” she muttered. “All of these answers could be correct depending on how you interpret the question.”
“Welcome to Professor Mandorelli’s exams. He gets off on ambiguity.”
She shot me a look. “You’re not helpful.”
“I’m extremely helpful. I’m helping you accept the inherent chaos of academia.”
Her lips twitched, fighting a grin, and I felt that familiar pull in my chest that happened anytime I got her to smile. The one I’d been trying to ignore.
Don’t, I told myself. Keep it light. Keep it simple.
The door to the coffee shop swung open, and I glanced up out of habit—then straightened when I saw Drew walking in, scanning the room until his gaze landed on us.
“Hey,” he said, dropping into the empty chair at our table. “I’d hoped I’d find someone I knew here. God, I desperately needed to get out of the house. I couldn’t concentrate for shit.”
This was fine. There was nothing weird about sitting at a table with my best friend and his twin sister. Nothing at all.
Except for the part where I’d had his sister bent over a bookshelf less than a month ago and couldn’t stop thinking about it on repeat multiple times an hour.
Fuck me.
“Thought you were on Rory duty,” I said, trying with all my might to keep my voice casual.
“Sam and Gordy offered to watch her so I could get some studying done. Harper’s studying with her roommates.
” He scrubbed a hand over his face, looking exhausted.
“I love my kid, but trying to memorize anything while she’s in the room is damn near impossible.
Single parenthood is not for the faint of heart. Anyway, what are you two working on?”
“Consumer Behavior final.” Ava held up her textbook. “It’s riveting stuff. Really. So riveting I can’t wait to put it behind me.”
“Sounds terrible.” Drew pulled out his own laptop and a stack of index cards. “I’ve got Econ. Kill me now.”
We settled into a rhythm—the three of us working in companionable silence, broken only by the occasional question or complaint. It was almost normal. Almost like old times, before Ava and I had complicated everything.
At one point, a group of guys stopped by our table when they spotted Drew and we got to talking about hockey and our hopes for next season. A few minutes later, a few more guys from the hockey team walked in and came up to our table.
“Hey, Drew. Liam. You guys ready for finals?”
“Hopefully,” Drew said with an affable smile.
They chatted for a few more minutes before leaving us to study.
And maybe it was because of how things had changed between us recently—and the fact that I was now hyperaware of everyone who looked her way—but I noticed something I hadn’t before. Ava was acknowledged, but never spoken to.
It happened twice more over the next hour. People coming to see Drew, people coming to see me, and Ava getting the “oh, hey!” tacked on at the end, or a simple up nod. People were always pleasant to her, but she was always secondary to us.
She never reacted. Just smiled and returned to her notes each time like it didn’t bother her.
But her lack of reaction told me everything. This wasn’t new for her. This was just her life. It wasn’t like she was invisible, but she wasn’t the focus.
And I don’t know why that bothered me so much, but now that I’d noticed it, I couldn’t seem to stop.
“Have you heard from Mom and Dad?” Ava asked after a while, her voice tentative.
The fallout with Drew’s parents over his relationship with Harper Tinsley had been far worse than I’d expected. The Dumontiers had always been a close-knit family. The fact that they’d let the Tinsley/Dumontier feud hurt their relationship with their son was crazy to me.
But Drew had made it clear he wasn’t giving her up, even if it meant not talking to his parents.
“Nope,” Drew said, popping the p like he didn’t care, but I knew he did.
“Drew,” Ava started.
“What?” He looked up from his flashcards, jaw tight. “They haven’t called, and I’m not going to be the one to break first. I didn’t do anything wrong.”
Ava sighed, setting down her highlighter. “I’m not saying you did. Are you still planning to stay here this summer?”
“Yes.” The word came out hard, making it clear it wasn’t up for further discussion. “I’m not playing happy family with people who can’t accept that I’m in love with Harper. I’d rather stay here and spend the summer with her.”
Drew had always been intense—about hockey and protecting the people he cared about—but this was different. This was a guy who’d drawn a line in the sand and refused to back down, even if it cost him.
“They’ll come around eventually,” Ava said softly. “They’re just stubborn.”
“Yeah, well. So am I.” Drew’s expression softened slightly when he looked at his sister. “You’re still going home though, right? Working at the dance studio in Meadowbrook?”
“That’s the plan.”
“Good. Someone should keep an eye on them. Make sure Dad doesn’t work himself into an early grave and Mom doesn’t redecorate the entire house out of boredom.” He paused. “Just—don’t let them guilt you into taking sides, okay? This is between me and them.”
“I know.” Ava reached across the table and squeezed his hand. “I’ve got your back. Always.”
Drew turned to me. “What about you? You doing the construction thing for my dad again?”
“Yeah, he offered and the money’s good.” I shrugged. “Tony at the rink also asked me to run the kids hockey camp this summer. It’s just a few days a week, like the camps we did as kids. Should be fun.”
“Wait, seriously?” Drew looked genuinely interested. “That’s cool, man. I didn’t know you were into coaching.”
“Eh, figured it’d be fun to give back, and it’s not like I’ve got a ton going on this summer. It’s just fundamentals—skating, passing, shooting. Nothing crazy.”
“I’d offer to help, but…” Drew gestured vaguely, and I knew what he meant. Because of this rift with his parents, he needed to work this summer at the gym, and all his free time would be spent with Harper and Rory.
“If you ever want to drop by, the kids would lose their minds. Campus hockey star showing up to teach them how to deke?” I grinned. “You’d be a god.”
Drew laughed. “Maybe. We’ll see how the summer shakes out.”
We all went back to studying for our finals, and I wasn’t sure how much time passed when my phone buzzed in my pocket.
Ava
Looks like it’ll just be you and me in Meadowbrook this summer.
I stared at the message.
Three dots appeared. Disappeared. Appeared again. I glanced up to Drew to see if he’d caught on that we were texting each other, but he was oblivious to anything beyond his own studies.
Ava
We should finish my bucket list. If you’re still interested.
I read the message twice, then a third time, my grip tightening on my phone.
This was what I’d been avoiding. What I’d been running from ever since the library. Because finishing the list meant more time with her. More excuses to touch her. More opportunities to forget that this was supposed to be temporary—a favor for a friend, nothing more.
But it also meant an ending. A finish line.
And I wasn’t sure what kind of man I would be by the time we got to that end.
Across the table, Ava was staring at her textbook like it held the secrets of the universe, but her shoulders were tense and her hand was still beneath the table, likely holding on to her phone waiting for my response.
She glanced at me out of the corner of her eye, and it was like a punch to the gut. She was afraid I was going to say no.
I was surprised she hadn’t figured out that when it came to her, I couldn’t say no.
Me
I’m still interested.
She read the message and instantly her shoulders relaxed.
Ava
Good. We can figure out the details later.
Me
It’s a plan.
She glanced up, and our eyes met for just a second. Fuck, but she had the most beautiful eyes of any woman in the world. They were their own constellation and I wanted to get lost in them.
Maybe I already was.
Then she looked back down at her notes, and I did the same, and we both pretended we hadn’t just agreed to spend the summer playing with fire.