Chapter 2 Alexander
TWO
ALEXANDER
The look in Emerik’s eyes when I handed him his fancy jar filled with a juicy glob of my spooge.
Priceless. I could tell he tried to stay professional, but it was all there in his eyes.
He was undressing me from the moment I stepped into his messy office.
Not that I would have minded. He’s a cute little bundle of nerdy magic, and I wouldn’t have turned down some help from him in the bathroom.
But no, those days of quickies are over.
I made my resolution, and I’m ready for something real.
And anyway, a talented magician isn’t going to want a happily ever after with a rapidly aging plumber.
“You’re really doing this?” my best friend Jessica asks incredulously as she lets Jill off her leash. “I would have pegged you as more of a skeptic.”
I throw the ball as hard as I can, and Max and Jill bound off as fast as they can, but Jill has him beat, as usual.
They’re both adorable mutts with some street smarts, but she’s the fastest thing on four feet and my sweet Max has a few years on her.
He’s a good sport, though, and he’ll happily play this game as long as my arm holds out.
“Don’t say it that way,” I answer as they speed back to us and Jill surrenders the ball, ready for another round. “It’s all your fault.”
“That’s not how I remember it,” she says, scrutinizing me like the sentimental fool I am. “As I remember there were tears—not that I’d ever reveal your dirty secret—and then you decided you needed something just as romantic.”
She’s right, of course. I don’t have a leg to stand on.
It started on New Year’s Day. We’d just finished our favorite romcom (you know the one—it’s everyone’s favorite and we watch it every year).
There may have been a tear or three, and I’m embarrassed to say I’d been grousing about my love life all day.
But damn it all, I want a real meet-cute just once in this miserable, gray life.
I want one achingly romantic moment, a story my friends will beg not to hear yet again, something we’ll tell the nurses at the retirement home.
“So sue me,” I answer, holding up the ball and trying not to sound as defensive as I feel. “I’m a closet romantic.”
She must see she’s hit a nerve, because she immediately backpedals. “I know, dear, and I love you for it. I know there’s a boy out there somewhere for you. But really, magic potions?”
“I know,” I say, trying not to sound too sheepish. “It does seem silly…but I’m desperate.”
I throw the ball and watch the pups speed off, full of canine energy.
That’s pure joy. They’re focused completely on their game, and nothing else matters.
When was the last time I felt the same? Hookups are fun and sexy, and I’ve certainly had a few, but it’s a transient joy.
I need someone I can hunker down with and build a lifetime of joy.
“Let me guess,” she continues, eyes dancing with gentle mischief. “You just watched Bell, Book, and Candle.”
“Um, well, yes. Guilty as charged.”
She bumps her hip into mine and says, “You know you’re adorable, don’t you?”
“Thanks for that. Maybe some guy will think the same someday, with the help of this potion. If magic is even real.”
“If not, it will be a fun experience. Sounds like you already have a good story to tell.”
“It’s funny you say that. An odd thing happened during my meeting with Emerik.” I need to run this by my best friend for a sanity check, just to make sure I’m not going completely bonkers. The whole magic thing, if it’s not simply a scam, is still a complete unknown, and maybe a bit terrifying.
“While you were doing the dirty, or after?” she asks, waggling her eyebrows.
“Before. Bloody hell, get your mind out of the gutter.”
“Why start now?” she laughs.
“Anyway, when I shook his hand, there was this little spark.”
“Let me guess,” she says, not at all unkindly. “You thought it was a sign from the almighty gods of romance.”
“Maybe?”
“Not to burst your bubble or anything, but it could be normal static electricity. Was his office carpeted?”
“No, but that’s not the strangest thing. I think I had a vision.”
She narrows her eyes and asks, “What other substances is this boy peddling?”
“Nothing like that. You know me—high on life and all that. No, it came out of nowhere when I touched his hand.”
“And…” She seems interested now.
“It was sweet. Just a quick glimpse of him on the beach. Max was there too, playing in the waves…”
“Sounds romantic?”
“...at sunset. So yes, it was romantic. It was the definition of romantic, but thinking back, it doesn’t seem real. Maybe I imagined it all. Maybe it was wishful thinking and my silly mind just slotted him into a daydream, since he was right there, shaking my hand. What do you think?”
“Who knows? I’m just as mystified about this magic stuff as you are. Potions? I never would have given it a second look. Is any of it real?”
“Honestly, I don’t even know, but I’m going to give it a try. What’s the worst that could happen?”