Chapter 1 Present
ONE
PRESENT
ARNICK
I was a terrible boyfriend. And an even worse mate.
Theo's birthday was in five days, and I'd finally gotten up the courage to find out if the human man I'd been dating since I got to the human realm around ten months ago was my mate.
He was, which meant all my worrying these past few months had been for nothing.
When Kym, the soul collector who could command fire that could remove every trace of darkness and dark magic from a person, had revealed there was an old magic keeping demons from recognizing our mates, a magic he could free us from, I'd been hesitant.
Because what would I do if Theo wasn't my mate?
I'd already had strong feelings for the human at that point, and I couldn't imagine leaving him.
But what would I have done if I'd stumbled upon my mate?
The fear had kept me from letting Kym free me of the magic until now. But with Theo's birthday coming up, I'd realized I couldn't stay in that limbo any longer.
So now I knew. Theo was my mate, and he had no idea. He didn't even know I was a demon.
I needed to tell him, but I was afraid. We'd been dating for months. What if Theo was mad I'd kept such a big secret from him? What if he thought he couldn't trust me and decided to leave? What would I do then?
"Hey," Theo said, knocking into me and pulling me out of my feelings. I met his curious green eyes. "You okay? You looked deep in thought."
We were supposed to be making dinner. Right. I'd just been standing there with a bowl of veggies for who knew how long.
"I'm okay."
Theo took them from me, carrying it over to the sink as he glanced back at me.
"Were you thinking about our plans for my birthday?" he asked with a little smile, and I blinked. Telling him on his birthday would be the worst possible thing to do, right?
Unless... what if instead of just blurting it out, I turned it into a day? I could give him little hints so when I did tell him, it wouldn't be a complete shock. Would that work? It was as good an idea as any.
"Yeah."
"Really? What are we doing?" he asked as he started washing the veggies, and I walked up to him, hugging him from behind.
"It's a surprise," I said since I didn't have any concrete plans yet, and he made an excited sound.
"I can't wait!" he said, and I pressed a kiss into his red hair, squeezing him to me.
"Too tight!" He gasped, and I loosened my hold instantly. He placed the bowl on the counter, then turned in my arms with a chuckle. "You still haven't figured out the right amount of force to use, huh?"
I winced at the reminder of our unfortunate first meeting, and he grinned up at me.
"I wonder if we would be here if we hadn't met the way we had," he mused, and I raised a brow at him.
"You mean you wouldn't have asked me out if that day in your coffee shop had been the first time you saw me?"
Theo wrinkled his nose, then shrugged, and I laughed.
"I suppose that's fair. I did not make a good second impression. Or first," I added, and he smiled.
"And yet there was something about you that made me ask you out, and I'm glad I did."
"So am I," I murmured, then brushed my lips against his. He hummed happily as he went up on his toes, kissing me back.
Sliding my hands to his thighs, I placed him on the countertop, and he laughed into the kiss as he wrapped his legs around mine, pulling me closer as his tongue slid into my mouth.
"Food," Theo said when he pulled back. He placed his palms on my chest as he untangled his legs from mine, and carefully pushed me back. Or, well, I let him believe he pushed me as I took a small step back. "We need food."
As we cooked, Theo told me about his day.
He was part-owner of a coffee shop, though the other owner, a distant cousin of his, was more of a silent partner.
Theo ran the place, while his cousin only came in when there was a problem.
The setup worked for both of them, and I'd done some surveillance to make sure his cousin wasn't doing anything off, or anything that could cause Theo harm. Not that Theo knew about it, of course.
I'd told him I worked as a ghostwriter, since I couldn't exactly tell him I didn't have or need a job. That was another thing I'd have to come clean about.
Fuck. My demon-ness wasn't the only thing I'd lied about, was it? Our whole relationship was built on lies, and I didn't know if Theo would be able to accept that.
I didn't want to imagine a reality in which he couldn't, even though it was the more likely scenario.
Fuck. If only there was a way I could go back in time and find out we were mates sooner. Why hadn't I taken Kym up on his offer when he first told me about it? Why had I been such a coward?
Blowing out a breath, I shook my head. I wasn't going to chicken out again. Sometime in the next five days, I was going to tell Theo the truth. I was going to tell him everything, and hope to Fate he accepted me.
THEO
A year ago, I'd been determined to take a long sabbatical from dating because men were shit and couldn't be trusted. I'd gotten my heart broken one time too many, and I'd been done.
But then I'd met Arnick, and while our first meeting hadn't gone well, and our second meeting had been awkward as fuck, something had made me break my promise to myself and ask him out.
At first, I'd only planned to thank him for what he'd done the first time I met him, but over the course of the night, I'd realized I wanted to know him better.
Now here I was, about to celebrate my birthday with him, and I couldn't be happier. In fact, I was so happy I was planning to ask him to move in with me. Or me with him. I really didn't care about the location as long as we lived together.
"Damn, this smells good," Arnick said as he stirred the pasta, his nose way too close to the pan.
"Careful, you'll burn yourself," I warned, and he pulled back, giving me a sheepish smile. He did that a lot, put himself into almost risky situations without realizing how risky they were until I pointed it out.
Like the time I'd found him showering with water hot enough to make you blister, and he'd only turned the temp down when I'd tried to step in and almost boiled myself. Somehow, he'd gotten away without burning himself.
Then there was the time I'd been baking cookies and he'd taken the tray out without wearing oven mitts.
He'd gotten better at being careful over the months, but I still caught him doing shit like that every once in a while.
It made me wonder about his upbringing, but he never talked about his parents, and I sensed it was a delicate subject for him.
I hadn't brought it up, but if I wanted to live with him, I should know these things about him. Shouldn't I?
"What kind of food did you eat growing up?" I asked, starting with something simple. Easy.
Arnick stared at me, his lips moving without sound. "Uh..."
I looked at him, curiosity tugging at me. It had been a simple question, hadn't it?
"Just the usual stuff," he said in the end, which was such a non-answer. It made me wonder about his childhood even more, but it was clear he didn't want to talk about it.
"What's your comfort food?"
Arnick thought about it for a moment, then smiled. "The double chocolate muffins you make."
"Really?"
He nodded, eyes sincere, and I leaned up to kiss his cheek. His answer did make me wonder if he hadn't had parents. Maybe he'd grown up in foster care? That would explain why he never talked about his parents, and why his comfort food wasn't something his mom used to make.
Shaking off my curiosity, I turned off the stove as Arnick grabbed the plates, then carried the pan to the dining table.
Arnick started serving us as I sat down, and I thanked him with a smile as he slid my full plate toward me.
"How was your writing today?" I asked as I took a bite of the pasta, humming at the warm, cheesy flavor.
Arnick made a face, then shrugged. "It was okay," he said, then took a bite of his own food.
Sometimes, I wondered if Arnick was hiding something from me. Something about the way he talked, the way he acted, made me suspicious, but then I wondered if it wasn't just a reaction to my past boyfriends.
Arnick had never given me a real reason to doubt him. He was sweet, kind, and a perfect gentleman. Yeah, he could be a bit careless sometimes, but never with malicious intent. Even when he did something risky, it only put him in danger. He never did that crap when I was with him.
There was no real reason for me to think Arnick was keeping secrets. Not wanting to talk about his childhood was perfectly valid. I had no idea what he'd been through, and it wasn't my place to decide when the right time for him to tell me was. I had to let him do it at his pace.
"One of the characters, he's been keeping the fact that he is a demon a secret from his boyfriend," Arnick said, surprising me.
He didn't usually talk about his writing, something about it messing with his process.
I had a feeling the author he wrote for didn't want him talking about it to people, but it wasn't like I would tell anyone.
"That sounds like it could cause issues between them," I mused, and he frowned.
"Yeah. I mean, he had good reasons. It was against the rules to tell a human about the existence of magic or supernatural beings, and if he'd broken the rule, he wouldn't have been allowed to stay in the human world any longer."
"Was?" I asked curiously, and he nodded.
"He later finds out that his boyfriend is his fated mate, his soulmate, basically. So now the rules have changed. He can tell him, but he's afraid his boyfriend will feel betrayed and break-up with him."
I pursed my lips as I thought about it. On one hand, it was a pretty big secret. On the other hand, he'd had his reasons. He couldn't have broken the rules.
"I think he'd understand, once the demon guy tells him everything."
"Yeah?' Arnick asked, and he almost looked relieved. Had he been stuck on that long?
"If he explained everything, why not? If his boyfriend really loves him, he would understand. He'd probably need a minute first to process everything, though."
"That's a good point," Arnick said, though he sounded like he wasn't all here. He was no doubt already running the scene through his mind.
"See? You can ask me for help if you're ever stuck. I'm a whiz," I joked, winking at him, and he chuckled.
"Never doubted it. Now finish up. I'd like to cuddle and watch a movie before we head to bed."
"That sounds like a good way to end the evening," I said as I scraped up the last of the pasta and stuck it into my mouth, and Arnick gave me a soft smile.
"It does, doesn't it?"