10. Ten
10
TEN
R ex might’ve been bold and brash when it came to protecting the casino. He was a big baby when it came to telling his parents and my brother about his impending fatherhood, however. Because I was annoyed—although I did my best to keep it under wraps—I decided to take the bull by the horns so to speak and force the issue.
“This is a terrible idea,” Rex hissed as he looked around my suite. I’d decided to have a catered meal so we could tell everybody all at once. “We should abort right now!”
I jerked my eyes to him, stunned. “What?”
Horror had him immediately shaking his head. “Not the baby. I’m talking about the mission.”
“And then what?” I asked reasonably. “What happens if we abort the mission—not the baby—and do nothing?”
“I wasn’t talking about the baby.” He turned surly. “I didn’t mean that. Don’t think I meant that.” To my surprise, he pressed his hand to my stomach. I hadn’t put on any weight yet—not even a little—but I could feel changes happening inside my body. It was a very surreal experience. “Don’t ever think that, Rex Jr.”
I frowned at him. “Rex Jr.?”
“Only if it’s a boy. If it’s a girl—when do we find that out by the way?—I was thinking of Rexanne.”
I blinked. Then I blinked again. Was he being serious right now? It used to be easy to tell with him.
“It’s like Roxanne but with a Rex to start,” he explained. “I think it’s cute.”
“We’re not naming the kid Rex or Rexanne.” I hadn’t thought of any names yet, but I could easily rule those two out. “It’s not happening.”
“I like Rex Jr.”
“Well … it’s not happening.”
“What names do you like?”
Now really wasn’t the time for that conversation. “Let’s get through dinner first,” I suggested. “Then, once you’re over the verbal beatdown—because that is coming—we’ll focus on names. I need to put together a list.”
He snorted but didn’t say anything.
“What’s with the snort?” I demanded.
“It’s just you and your lists. You like them way too much.”
I shrugged. “There’s nothing wrong with having a list. It keeps you on point. I like an orderly life. That’s going to be helpful with a baby.”
“If you say so.” He patted my shoulder. In the days since he’d confirmed he wanted to be a father, we’d fallen into an easy routine. It started with him buying a few books—he went for the audio versions because he said he fell asleep when reading a paperback—and culminated with him adding my doctors’ appointments into his phone calendar.
“I’m being serious,” I insisted. “Everything I’ve read says that a schedule is key with a baby.”
“Okay, but you do realize that babies don’t actually understand about keeping schedules, right? They’re little mayhem machines.”
“How would you know?”
“I know things.”
“Yeah, yeah, yeah.” The knock at the door had me jerking up my chin. The food had been delivered to the kitchen ten minutes before, so everything was ready. “It’s time.”
He frowned. “They’re going to be suspicious about why I’m here.”
“I told them I just wanted to have a family dinner. They won’t be suspicious until your parents show up.”
He balked. “You invited my parents too?”
“I told you that.”
“You did not.” He turned belligerent. “I would’ve remembered if you’d told me that.”
“Geez.” I rolled my eyes and escaped from the kitchen. “Just … take a breath. Nobody is going to question why you’re here until your parents show up. Then they’re going to realize the truth before we even have to tell them.”
“What makes you say that?”
“Because everybody has been waiting for you to knock up a showgirl for ten years. They might be surprised that I’m the one you knocked up, but it’s not as if you have the word ‘responsible’ stamped on your forehead.”
His mouth fell open as I walked toward the door. “We’re going to talk about that crack later,” he warned.
“I’m looking forward to it.” When I pulled open the door, I found Mom, Pearl, Opal, Olivia, and Zach waiting for me. “Thanks for coming.” I ushered them inside, exchanging a heavy look with my sister-in-law. She was the only one who knew what was coming. “I appreciate it.”
“Of course we came.” Mom pulled me in for a tight hug. We weren’t touchy-feely in the Stone family, so it was a bit of a surprise. “How are you feeling? Are you still puking every morning? You should be escaping from that window within the next few weeks. Once I was past the fourth month, it was smooth sailing.” She pulled back and smiled. “Well, except for dealing with your father. He was a big baby about everything. You would’ve thought he was the one carrying the baby.”
“I—” Before I could decide what to say, two other figures appeared behind my incoming family. “Hey.” I let loose a nervous giggle. I thought I would have more time to prepare myself for their arrival. “How are you guys?”
I’d known Bill and Patty Carter for a very long time. Even though Rex and Zach were the ones who were friends, the Carters were always invited to holiday parties and even gifted comp tickets for big events for as long as I could remember. They were the calm and welcoming sort, which had me hoping they would take the news they were about to be grandparents well.
“We’re great.” Patty beamed at me as she walked into the suite. “Thank you so much for inviting us.”
Mom jerked her eyes to Bill and Patty, seemingly confused. “I didn’t realize you were coming too.”
“We were a bit surprised when we got the invitation,” Patty said. “We were too curious to turn it down, though.” Her smile was warm when it landed on me. “You look lovely, Ruby. You’re positively glowing.”
I cast a suspicious look toward Olivia, but her small, almost imperceptible headshake said that she hadn’t let the baby out of the diaper bag. Perhaps Patty was just being pleasant. “Thank you.” I moved to allow the door to shut behind them, but it didn’t close. Instead two more people appeared in the opening. Two people I wasn’t expecting.
“What the hell are you doing here?” I demanded of my father and his very pregnant mistress Claire. I hadn’t seen the woman in months. She’d been my father’s secretary—he never put a lot of effort into finding his bed partners—and she’d left the company not long after becoming pregnant. At the time, she likely thought my father would take care of everything and she didn’t need a job. When he’d lost his position and income, it had to have been a blow.
“I heard there was a family dinner,” Dad replied, tugging on the arms of his suit jacket. He didn’t smile in greeting. “Since I’m part of the family, I just assumed you were extending the invitation to me as well.”
“Well, you assumed wrong.” I moved to close the door in his face, but he extended a hand to stop me.
“Don’t be dramatic, Ruby,” he drawled. “I’m your father. We should start normalizing family events. I mean … that’s how other families work things during a divorce.” He cast Mom a superior look. “Cora. You look … old. I’m sure you remember Claire.”
Mom looked as if she was about to start chewing steel rods. “How could we possibly forget?” She tipped her head as she looked Claire up and down. “You look close to bursting. Are you worried that, given your background as a slut and Ryder’s background as a dog that you’re going to give birth to the antichrist himself?”
Claire seemed confused by the question. “It’s a girl. That’s what the ultrasound said.”
Mom rolled her eyes. “Utterly humorless, as expected.” She shook her head. “Does she even have three digits in her IQ, Ryder?”
“Who cares?” Ryder shot back. “She’s so hot she’s got three digits on the thermometer. That’s the only thing that matters.”
“Witty as always,” Mom drawled. Her eyes moved to me. “Are you rethinking a family dinner yet?”
“No.” I forced myself to remain calm, although it wasn’t easy. “I called everybody here for a reason.”
“You called Bill and Patty here for a reason?” Confusion etched across Mom’s features. “I don’t understand.”
I shot a pointed look toward Rex, who had remained in the kitchen, far away from prying eyes. “Would you like to chime in here?” I prodded him.
“Oh, I think you have everything under control,” he countered. “I mean … this is your place. You really should do the talking.”
The irritation I’d thought sated started chanting for blood. It didn’t help that Claire had flopped into my favorite chair and was eyeing the appetizers as if she hadn’t eaten in weeks. “Fine.” I steeled myself for what was to come. “Rex and I are having a baby.”
It wasn’t how I saw it going. I figured Rex would trip over his own tongue eight times before he got the information out. Then there would be a lot of “oh my god” and “how did this happen” exclamations. Dinner would’ve been uncomfortable, full of more questions than we were likely ready to answer, but by dessert everybody would have settled.
Now that my father was here, nobody was going to be settling. Dragging it out would’ve been cruel and unusual punishment for everybody concerned. It was best to just rip the bandage off. That was my way after all.
“Well, you could’ve been a little more subtle than that,” Rex hissed.
I merely shrugged. It was out. Now everybody was going to have to deal with it.
“Is that true?” Bill eyed his son with a great deal of disappointment. “Are you and Ruby having a baby?”
“No, we just thought it would be fun to gather both of our families together—add on Satan’s mistress for good measure—and throw everybody’s lives into turmoil,” Rex replied dryly.
“Nobody needs the sarcasm, Rex.” Patty’s expression was impossible to read. “Are you seriously going to be a father?”
Rex’s throat worked overtime as he nodded. “Yeah. Surprise!” He threw his hands into the air. “You’re going to be grandparents. Aren’t you excited?”
I had to hand it to him. That was probably the best way to go about things with his parents. They weren’t likely to dwell on it too long before accepting it.
I was not expecting what happened next, however. Bill dug in his pocket, came back with his wallet, and fished out a fifty-dollar bill, which he promptly handed over to his wife.
“Thank you.” Patty’s smile was prim as she slid the money into her pocket. To my utter surprise, she crossed to me. “Welcome to the family.” She pulled me into her embrace, allowing me to send a shocked look over her shoulder in Rex’s direction. What exactly was happening here?
“Um…”
“We’re not getting married,” Rex blurted. He was terrible when it came to serious discussions. It was a wonder he managed to be so good at his job. “I proposed, but Ruby said no, so we’re just going to raise the baby as friends. I’ve suggested Rex Jr. and Rexanne as names, but she shot me down. We’re still debating that I guess.”
I was incredulous as I pulled away from his mother and glared at him. “Now I see that I should’ve put together a script.”
He held out his hands. “I’m nervous. I say stupid things when I’m nervous.”
“Obviously.” I licked my lips. When I turned back to the others, I found a variety of expressions waiting for me. “We’re still working out the details.”
“Is this why you didn’t want to say who the father was when you announced you were pregnant?” Zach demanded. He wasn’t actually focused on me, instead shooting daggers in Rex’s direction. “How did this even happen?”
“Well, when a man and woman get really drunk at an engagement party that’s set after the couple have already gotten married,” I started.
Zach’s mouth fell open. “You got pregnant at our engagement party?”
“After,” I replied. “Rex walked me home.”
“Apparently, he did a little more than that.” Zach folded his arms over his chest and continued to scowl at his best friend. “I don’t ever want to hear another word about me marrying your sister. Not in jest. Not when you’re in the mood to poke me. Just never again. I mean … this is so much worse.”
Rex was appropriately apologetic. “I’m sorry. It just happened.” He lowered his voice. “I wanted to leave two hours before I did, but Ruby made me stay.”
“Yes, this is all on me,” I agreed sarcastically, my eyes doing somersaults. “Geez.”
“Actually, I’m pleasantly surprised,” Mom said out of nowhere. “I figured it was some random guy Ruby picked up at a bar. Rex is a far better prospect.” She looked him up and down. “What I don’t understand is why you hid this part of the story until now? It’s been almost two weeks since you announced you were pregnant. Why wasn’t Rex there for the initial info drop?”
“Because he needed time to think,” I replied.
Rex made a strangled sound when his parents swung their laser glares toward him. “It’s not as bad as she makes it sound,” he insisted. “She made me think about it. I didn’t want to think about it.”
“Unbelievable,” Patty muttered before retrieving the money she’d tucked into her pocket and handing it back to Bill, who looked smug.
“What’s going on with the money?” I asked. I couldn’t help myself from being curious.
“Bill and I have a few bets going,” Patty replied. “I bet that Rex wouldn’t be married when he knocked someone up. Bill disagreed. I also bet that Rex would immediately do the right thing under those circumstances, and Bill said otherwise.”
Rex opened his mouth, then shut it. He looked as if he might pass out at any moment.
“I take it you’re done being an idiot.” Bill’s tone was stern as he regarded his son.
“Yes.” Rex nodded. “I didn’t want to be an idiot in the first place. Ruby insisted that I think about it, though. She said that it was necessary.”
“Well, Ruby is a smart woman.” Patty glared at her son. “Other than being stupid enough to procreate with you.” I thought she was done but kept going anyway. “Really, Rex? You had to think about it?”
Before the conversation could spin out of control—and that’s exactly where it was going—I stepped between mother and son. “Since this is going to be an unorthodox situation, I wanted to make sure he was onboard. I’m fine raising a child on my own. Rex wants to be a part of the process, though.”
“Of course he does.” Patty shook her head. “I never doubted that. I just didn’t think he was going to be a moron before getting to that point.”
“Thanks, Mom,” Rex said dryly.
“You’re welcome.” Patty pursed her lips before darting her gaze to my mother. “We should probably put our heads together for a baby shower.”
“Definitely,” Mom agreed. She didn’t look all that surprised that Rex was the father. Perhaps, after the big truth bomb of the actual pregnancy, nothing was ever going to shake her again. “Let’s give it a few weeks to get settled—let these two idiots start figuring things out—and then we’ll clean up whatever mess they make.”
“Hey!” I was understandably affronted. “Why do you think we’re going to make a mess of things?”
Mom absently patted my arm. “Oh, don’t think that I’m worried about what kind of parent you’re going to be. You’ll be a terrific mother … eventually. Until you two get your heads on straight, though, this situation is going to be a mess.”
What was that supposed to mean? “How do you figure?”
“Don’t worry about it.” Mom made a clucking sound with her tongue. “Everything will work out.” She headed for the kitchen. “What did you order for dinner?”
“Italian,” I replied.
“Good choice.” Mom smiled, but there was something odd about the expression that I couldn’t pinpoint. She was up to something. What, though?
Rather than dwell on it too long, I turned my attention to my father. “Don’t you have something snarky to say?”
His eyes were red-rimmed, and he pressed a hand to the spot above his heart, throwing me. “I’m going to be a grandpa?”
He couldn’t be serious. “You’re not going to have anything to do with this kid.”
My icy response didn’t dull what looked to be legitimate excitement. “I want to be a Pop-Pop, Ruby. Grandpa makes me sound old. Is it a boy or a girl? It doesn’t matter. I’m going to spoil the crap out of him or her regardless.”
I glanced at my sisters, unsure what was happening. They looked as dumbfounded as I felt. Was this real? If not, it was quite the act.
“How come you’re more interested in Ruby’s kid than the one we’re having?” Claire asked, looking surly.
Dad merely shrugged. “I’ve already had four kids. This is my first grandkid. That’s way better.”
Was it? I had no idea what to make of it.
“So, what’s the plan?” Zach asked. He’d been pouting in the corner of the suite since the news broke. “Like … are you guys going to move in together?”
“No.” I refused to let others make demands on how we should act. “We’re going to figure out a way to successfully co-parent without being a couple.”
“And what’s that going to look like?”
That was a very good question. “I have no idea. Thankfully, we have six months to figure it out.”
That was more than enough time. Or, well, I hoped that was true. If not, we were in for a bumpy ride.