Chapter Seven #2
“Not in the way Law hurt Dan.” Bane walks toward her.
“Our animals are impatient. It takes more energy to control them. Every second, we're trying to give you time. If we're forced to be away from you, it would be torture. Having any male other than the four of us around you is nauseating. I was proud of Law for taking care of that man. He couldn’t be allowed to walk away without punishment.” He stops in front of her, grasping the hand on her neck, pulling, and placing her arm to her side. “We're part animal, but we try to act civilly. Sometimes we can’t.” He slides his hand to the base of her throat. “It’s our job to protect you. Keep you safe. Until you decide to complete the bond, we'll be close, watching. Waiting. Please don’t ask us to leave you. That would hurt us more.” Her lips part as he flexes his hand, his finger rubbing against her pulse.
He stares at her a minute more before backing away. “Where’s the bathroom?”
Haven shakes her head and points.
We stand in silence watching Bane walk away. Once he disappears through a door, I turn to her.
“I don’t smell your fear,” I say softly.
“So, you can smell everything? Every emotion?” she asks.
“Most. Why aren’t you scared?” Her scent is filled with curiosity and desire. She moves around the island and to the fridge. I bite back the groan as she bends to get some water.
“Want one?” she asks, shaking the bottle.
“Sure.” I move toward her, stopping on the other side of the counter.
“Do you think Bane wants something?”
“Bane?” I call out, and wait for his response.
“Yeah.”
“He’ll take one,” I say, and her eyes widen.
“Damn, I couldn’t hear that,” she mumbles, spinning back to get one. Bane leaves the bathroom and joins me at the counter. Haven hands him the water.
“Thanks, baby,” Bane says.
“When I was eleven, I wanted to join the circus.” She smiles.
“It was a small traveling one that I desperately wanted to go and see. I asked my father to take me. He said no and wouldn’t let me go.
Father thought he was too sophisticated to sit on a bleacher and eat food out of a paper container.
He lectured about the bad people who worked at those places.
I was so mad at him, so I snuck out. He worked a lot anyway.
I planned to be back before he got home.
It was the best day.” She leans across from us, her arms lying on the counter, resting her chin on her palm.
“My father would always leave his wallet on his desk at night. I stole some money from it the night before so I could get in and play some games. I remember watching the acts, seeing the camaraderie, and enjoying their talent. I ate popcorn and cotton candy and won a stuffed animal. There was a beautiful woman who wore flowy skirts and danced with fire. Her hair was wild and a bright, vibrant red. Her skin was tattooed from head to toe. I thought, ‘I want to be like her.’ She was free and owned her differences. Who wants to be just like everyone else? My father wore suits to work every day. He never had fun or laughed. What kind of life is that?” She drops her arm and traces the grooves in the bottle.
“The woman’s husband worked there, too. She finished her act, and I watched them interact with each other.
Man, the love they showed openly. A couple of other people joined them.
I can still remember the music of their laughter.
I wanted that. I wanted to belong somewhere because I certainly didn’t belong in the sterile house I grew up in.
“Life is dirty. Our pasts are filled with pain, and moments we wish could be changed. We feel guilt for the things we regret. Not every decision we have made has been a good one. Life would be boring without those things. I realize all of you are part animal. I’m sure there are aspects of your life you will find hard to share, but I won’t ever condemn you for them.
” She looks between us. “I’ve searched for a place where I can be myself.
Don’t try to change yourself or your experiences because you think I can’t handle it. I could surprise you.”
“Did your father find out?” I ask, her words hitting me in the chest. She's too good to be true.
“He did.” She licks her lips. “I got carried away and stayed too long. He wasn’t pleased.”
“What did he do?” Bane asks.
“He beat the shit out of me,” she says calmly. “I couldn’t go to school for a week until the bruises could be covered with makeup.”
“Fuck,” I grit out, and Bane growls.
“It was worth it,” she whispers, standing straight.
“It was still the best day. I healed, and I became more determined to test the boundaries and question everything he tried to teach me. I lived my life my way. He tried to stop me numerous times, and there were always consequences for my defiance, but I refused to be like him. That’s why Rylee means so much to me.
Father thought writing letters was ladylike and elegant.
She was my safe space. It was easy to believe her about the world she lives in.
I don’t care what she turns into. It doesn’t take away from our friendship.
” She puts the cap on her water. “There are blankets on the couch. I’m exhausted.
” She comes around the counter. “Sleep well, Lawson.” She grips my arm and stands on her toes.
I lean down, and am surprised when she kisses my cheek.
She drops down and repeats the action with Bane.
“Sleep well, Bane.” She smiles softly and walks away.
We sit in shocked silence. I take several deep breaths, trying to calm my racing heart.
“I want to kill him,” I whisper.
“I need to call Hunter and Remy,” Bane says, pulling out his phone. “They need to know.”
“Do you think your preferences could affect her badly?” I turn to face him.
“They might,” he mumbles. “Either way, they should be aware.” He nods and then walks away.
I roll my shoulders and push away from the counter. My body is tired, but my mind is a chaotic mess. She discussed being hit by a man who should have protected her as if it were just a fact. I hate that she grew up that way. She should have been loved and cherished.
So fucked up.
Bane opens the door to the balcony and slips outside.
He won’t rest until he talks to our brothers.
I take off my shirt on my way to the couch.
I'll rely on him to make things clear to them.
I move the blankets to the other side of the couch and stretch out, folding my arms underneath my head.
My jaguar is satisfied for the moment. At least we're close to Haven. She's safe, and I’m surrounded by her scent. I’m more determined than ever to beat back my demons and be the man she needs.
If I have to kill her father to make it better, I will.
I will gladly stain my hands with blood again.