Chapter Fourteen #2
“Make him come, baby,” Remy whispers, pinching my nipple. “Make him fill you up.” His words cause my skin to erupt in goosebumps.
“Yes,” I hiss, grinding down. Lawson’s roar fills the room as he comes, and I follow. I drop my head back as I fall over the edge, riding him till the very end of the wave. My hips jerk before coming to a stop, and I gratefully lean against Remy, needing his support.
“Stunning,” he rumbles.
I look at Lawson. His breathing is harsh, and his teeth are curved over his bottom lip. His eyes are bright, and his hands flex. I can hardly believe what we just shared, but his body is tense. I know what he needs.
“Lawson,” I breathe, and move away from Remy. I ease down, pressing my chest against his. I grasp his shoulders, moving up slightly, and he slips out of me as I hold my face over his. His wild eyes widen as I lean down and kiss the corner of his mouth.
“Perfect,” Remy whispers. He trails his fingers down my spine, backs away, and shuts the bedroom door behind him.
“Haven,” Lawson says, his voice rough.
“That was beautiful.” I kiss the other side of his mouth and lift my hand. Tracing his face, he calms, and his body sinks against the bed. I continue my touch, staring into his eyes. His teeth slowly recede, and his eyes relax. He holds me tightly to his chest and moves us up the bed.
“Thank you for that gift,” he whispers. My heart opens, welcoming him inside.
“You don’t need to thank me.” I touch his cheeks, his lips, and then his eyes.
They flutter shut, and a rumble vibrates his chest. His breathing deepens as I continue to caress him.
His arm loosens. My Lawson falls asleep.
I stare at him in awe. This powerful man hides so many demons, but all he needed was for me to trust him.
The problem is, he needs to trust himself.
I hope this was the first step in getting there.
Yes, being with him was about getting pleasure, yet it was so much more. I want to cuddle him and hold him close through the night. He needs to know he's safe with me, but first, I need to talk to Remy.
I ease away, and he doesn’t move. Crawling over him, I pause on the side of the bed and pull a blanket over him.
He looks so peaceful now. I step lightly as I slip into the bathroom and use the toilet.
I stare at my bright cheeks as I wash my hands and shake my head.
I’m trying not to overthink. If I let my brain rule my actions, I should be running away, yet my heart would break.
In a short time, the brothers have burrowed under my skin.
I have barely scratched the surface of their lives, but what I have learned makes me want to give them a safe place to be themselves.
I know they want me, no matter what ghosts I have in my past.
I grab Bane’s shirt and slip it on. With one more look at the bed and Lawson’s sleeping form, I slip out the door. I look around and see Remy leaning against the window, staring outside, a cup in his hand. As I walk closer, he turns his head.
“He doesn’t sleep well,” he says softly, looking toward my bedroom. “He has nightmares and wakes several times a night. I hope he rests well tonight.”
“You worry about him.” I stop beside him, and he looks down at me.
“Always.” He grins. “You did well. I think he’ll be alright tonight.” He tugs on my hair. “Did you enjoy yourself?”
“You couldn’t tell,” I say with a smile.
“Brat,” he mumbles, dropping his hand. “I should have explained beforehand; we can’t get humans pregnant.”
“We can’t have babies?” I ask, and my cheeks heat as his grin widens.
“We can, but not until we complete the bond,” he says. “Your human body couldn’t survive a shifter birth, so fortunately, the universe made it impossible.” I lean against the window. “Lawson needed your acceptance.”
“And you?” I ask.
“Of course, but I have more patience.” He takes a drink, his eyes crinkling.
“Am I supposed to feel like this?” I ask.
“How do you feel?”
“As if my past happened so I could meet the four of you.” I lick my lips, his body tenses, and he slowly lowers his drink.
“I don’t want to leave, and I feel as if I’m supposed to be with you, with all of you.
I’ve never had sex with a man so quickly.
I’ve made them work hard to earn it.” His lip curls.
“It felt right. I knew he needed me. This place…” I look out the window.
“The four of you…” I look at him. “Feel like the home I’ve wished for. ”
Remy steps to the side and places his cup on the coffee table.
“Our purpose is to provide you with a home.” He resumes his position, leaning his shoulder against the glass, and crosses his arms. “We live now to make you happy. Everything we do is to protect you, give you a family, and pieces of our souls. In the past, we haven’t been the most affectionate men.
Our lives have been rough. There were no gentle touches, loving words, or safety.
” My heart aches for them even though those moments were few in my life.
“We have shoved those emotions away, but hoped to find someone who would be willing to give us all of them. You are that woman.”
“It seems so impossible,” I say.
“For a human, yes. You're handling it well. For us, it’s the most natural thing in the world to share you.
I love my brothers more than anything in this world.
Seeing you with Lawson was heartwarming.
I felt no jealousy, only pride and gratefulness.
You can love him as he needs. It was beautiful to see how much you already trust him.
The mating bond is working. You're a human, yet you can feel the pull.” He smiles gently.
“I want you to give in to it. Let it guide you, and trust how you feel.”
“Trust,” I mumble. It seems to be the theme of our time together.
“Every relationship, a good relationship needs it. Don’t doubt, just fall. You will have four sets of arms to catch you,” he whispers, and I want to cry.
“I don’t remember a time I had someone besides Rylee who would.” I rub my throat, and his eyes flicker to my hand. “I want that. I want all of you.”
“Good. We want nothing but you,” he says roughly.
“I would never guess that you haven’t been together your whole lives,” I mumble, and he shifts.
“I wish that were the case,” he grits out, looking away.
“I thought I was the lucky one. My aunt Vivian adopted me. I’d never seen her before, but I could smell the relation to my mother.
I remember not wanting to leave my brothers.
She refused to take all of us, and my young mind thought it was wrong, yet my heart was broken, and I thought she could fill it back up.
” He laughs, but it’s filled with bitterness.
“I was very wrong. She took me to a big house, bought me new clothes, and gave me a bedroom. It was all for show. She was obsessed with appearances, and adopting a long-lost relative's son made her appear as a kind soul.” He looks at me. “They didn’t see what happened behind closed doors. They didn’t see all the times she slapped me or lectured me. ”
“Remy,” I whisper, my heart breaking for the little boy.
“I appear always in control, but I was trained to act like everything is perfect. She demanded it, and I learned never to disappoint her.”
“Or what?” I ask.
“Or I would be locked in the basement until I learned the error of my ways,” he growls.
I inhale sharply.