Chapter 22
CHAPTER 22
Nikita
L ily looked so vulnerable sitting next to me, so lost and unsure. What she needed was security. She needed to know everything was okay, finally. And I had to be the one to show her.
I gently pushed her shoulders back until she rested flat on the bed, still looking up at me with a silent plea. I shifted on top of her, admiring her skin in the low light. I wanted to cover it in kisses, find every sensitive spot that made her shudder.
"Lily," I whispered, my voice rough with emotion as I leaned down, pressing my lips to the curve of her neck. "I want to make it alright. Everything."
She didn't respond with words—she didn't have to. The way her hands gripped my shoulders, the way her breath caught in her throat, told me everything I needed to know. Her body was speaking to me, answering my every touch, and for the first time in a long time, I felt something other than cold detachment.
I pulled back just enough to look into her eyes, my fingers brushing a strand of hair away from her face. "You need to know something," I said quietly, my heart pounding in my chest. "I never expected this. Never expected you to mean this much to me."
Her eyes searched mine, wide with uncertainty, but I could see the same emotions mirrored in her gaze. She had been through so much—betrayal, pain, and loss—and yet here we were, tangled together in a way I never thought possible.
"I'm not good at this," I admitted, my voice low as I trailed my fingers down her arm, feeling the goosebumps rise on her skin. "I don't trust easily. Hell, I'm not even sure if I know how to love someone without destroying them."
Lily's breath hitched, and I could see the vulnerability in her eyes. She wasn't sure if she could trust me, either, but I needed her to know that this—what we had—was real.
"But I want to try," I said, my voice firm. "I want to try to be the man you deserve. I want to build something with you, something that isn't tainted by all the shit that's come before."
Her lips parted, and for a moment, she just stared at me, as if processing my words. Then, slowly, she nodded, her hand coming up to cup the side of my face.
"I want that too," she whispered, her voice trembling with emotion. "I want us, Nikita. But I'm scared. I don't know if I can leave the past behind."
I leaned down, brushing my lips against hers, a soft, tender kiss that promised more than words ever could. "We'll move forward together," I murmured against her mouth. "One step at a time. No more lies, no more walls between us."
She kissed me, her lips soft and needy, and I felt the last of my reservations melt away. I had never let anyone in like this, had never allowed myself to be vulnerable with anyone, but with Lily, it was different. She made me want to be better. She made me want to give her everything.
I deepened the kiss, my hands roaming over her body as I pulled her closer, feeling the warmth of her skin against mine. Every touch, every kiss was a promise—a promise that we would move forward, together. That we would find a way to trust each other, to heal from the wounds of our past.
My lips moved to her collarbone, pressing kisses along the smooth line of her skin as I pushed the straps of her nightgown down her shoulders. Her breath came faster, her hands fisting in the sheets beneath us as she arched into me, silently begging for more.
"Tell me you're mine," I growled softly, my voice rough with need. "I need to hear it."
"I'm yours," she whispered, her voice breathless, her eyes heavy-lidded with desire. "Always."
That was all I needed. I claimed her mouth again, this time with more urgency, more heat. She responded eagerly, her body moving against mine as the tension between us reached a boiling point. I wanted to possess her completely, to make her forget everything except this moment—except us.
I slid my hand down her thigh and reached for the hem of her nightgown. I pulled it up and felt her squirm as the cool air touched the tops of her thighs. I smoothed my hand over her stomach, loving the silky feel of her warm skin, and started trailing my kisses lower, first claiming her collarbone, then kissing a line to her chest.
"Nikita," she gasped, her nails raking down my spine, sending a shiver of pleasure through me.
I kissed the soft mounds of her chest, one after the other, then teased a nipple with the tip of my tongue. "You're mine," I growled against her, nipping with my teeth. "No one else. Just me."
Lily's breath hitched, her body arching into mine as I sucked on her nipples, my fingers now dipping between her legs to stroke her through her panties. I could feel the way her body responded to every touch, every kiss—she was giving herself to me completely. And it wasn't just physical. This was something more. Something I never thought I'd find.
Lily's little mewls and twitches were driving me crazy. I rubbed between her legs with more force, listening for how she reacted. When her hips started to grind against my touch, I knew she needed more. I kissed a trail lower, down her stomach. Her fingers seemed to want to hold onto me, but at the same time, there was more I could give her.
"I've never felt this before," I murmured against her skin, my lips brushing over her lower stomach as my hand pulled her panties down. "Never wanted anyone like this."
Her fingers threaded through my hair, pulling me closer as she whispered, "Nikita…"
I raised up slightly, just enough to meet her eyes, my chest tight with the weight of what I was about to say. "I want you to know, Lily, that I'll protect you. No matter what happens, no matter what the future holds. But…" I paused, searching her face for any hint of hesitation, "you need to know I'm still learning. Learning to trust. Learning to let someone in."
Her eyes softened, her hand sliding down to rest against my cheek. "We'll figure it out," she whispered, her voice steady. "We'll learn together. But you have to trust me too, Nikita."
It was a simple statement, but it hit me harder than I expected. Trust had never come easily for me, and after everything that had happened between us—the lies, the betrayal—it was harder now than ever. But if I was going to build a future with her, if we were going to leave this violent world behind, I had to trust her. I had to let her in.
"I trust you," I said quietly, the words feeling foreign on my tongue but right in my heart. "I'm not used to this… but I trust you."
Lily smiled a little with relief. I lowered again, pulling her panties down her legs, and gently spread her thighs. Tongue first, I tasted my wife, parting her plump lips with my tongue as I moaned at the taste of her. Her back arched, her hips rolling slowly beneath my hands as she continued to give herself to me. I felt her hands snake back into my hair as she pulled me close, inviting me to feast.
I suckled and savored her juices. I licked her clit hard, softly, lightly, searching for what she couldn't get enough of. I alternated, telling her at once that I could do it all—I could take her roughly, I could make her come sweetly.
I could love her.
When she shuddered on my tongue, her fingers pulling my hair so hard it hurt, my cock reacted painfully. I was rock hard and aching to feel her walls wrapped around me.
When I made my way back up to her lips, she was starved for me. She kissed her juices from my lips, then sought more on my tongue. I couldn't position myself between her legs fast enough—she was reaching for my length, guiding me home with her gentle touch.
I slid into my Lily and groaned into her neck, unable to hide how badly I needed this myself.
"Oh Nikita," she cried, sounding almost close to tears.
"Lily," I murmured, starting to pull out, only to slide back in, deeply. "Fuck, Lily."
Her hips met me thrust for thrust, matching my speed, adapting to how I wanted to take her. She was so sensitive, crying out sharply as I plunged in deep to touch that spot. And I couldn't stop myself, couldn't help burying deeper, faster, harder.
Our rhythm filled the room, our breaths, our bodies coming together, her juices welcoming me. The world around us faded, and all that mattered was this—our bodies, our connection, our future.
"Nikita, come, come," she whispered.
"Fuck," I hissed, losing myself in her.
I raced toward the edge, feeling that I was bringing her along with me. Her pussy tightened, urging me on. I knew she wanted me to spill deep inside, like I had every time. Like I always would.
"I'm coming, Lily," I grunted. "Oh fuck, I'm coming."
I released it all and felt the crash make my body heavy. Lily clung to me as tightly as she could, our chests heaving, our mouths open and panting.
We lay tangled together, the sweat cooling on our skin as the aftershocks of our lovemaking still lingered in the air. I could feel Lily's heart beating against my chest, her soft breath against my neck. For the first time in a long time, I felt at peace.
But there was still something hanging between us, something unsaid.
"I love you," I said quietly, my voice low but steady. "I didn't want to admit it. I fought it for so long because I was scared of what it meant. Scared of letting someone in again. But I do, Lily. I love you."
She didn't say anything for a moment, but when she pulled back to look at me, I saw the tears in her eyes. "I love you, too," she whispered, her voice thick with emotion. "I didn't think I could after everything… but I do. And I want to build a future with you. I want to leave the past behind."
I nodded, my chest tight with emotion as I stroked her hair. "We'll do it together. I've already started making changes—legitimizing parts of the business. Stepping away from the darker parts of it all. It'll take time, but I'm doing it for us. For our future."
Her eyes searched mine, and for the first time, I saw real hope there. "Do you think we can really do it? Leave it all behind?"
I pressed a soft kiss to her forehead. "We can. I'll make sure of it."