15/Renee
I was so proud of my daughter. We had driven through our neighborhood and not once did I have to yell at her to stop the car.
About damn time.
I have been working with Tamara for almost four months and was starting to think that we were never going to get to this point. Now I could see that my work here was almost done.
She pulled into the driveway and the feeling of uneasiness returned momentarily until she put the car in park.
“Don’t worry, Mama, I’m not going to run into the garage again.”
“Uh-huh,” I mumbled as I looked out at my new garage door. I think she must have fallen asleep at the wheel that day. By the time I’d realized she wasn’t going to put her foot on the brake, she had already slammed into the garage door.
We went inside and I moved into the kitchen to make dinner while she went to her room to do her homework. Every day I picked her up from school and every day she drove us home. The hours worked perfectly for me and Tamara. Quinton had his own car. A big-ass Cadillac.
I reached inside the refrigerator for the ground beef because I was in the mood for spaghetti. While I was browning the meat, Danielle called.
“Remember that fine guy I met at the club?” She sounded too damn happy.
I had to dig through my memory bank for a second. “The dark-skinned one with a mouthful of gold teeth?”
“Yep, Chance.”
“What about him?”
“I just found out today he works at the hospital.”
“Where at?” Probably housekeeping. My girl has a thing for thugs and blue-collar workers.
“No, he doesn’t work in housekeeping or food service.”
She’d read my mind. I had to laugh.
“He draws blood.”
“Really.” That was definitely an improvement.
“I ran into him in the hallway and he called me at the nurses’ station and asked me out to dinner tonight.”
“Hell nah. And he’s paying?” Hey, I gotta ask because she’s usually the one who does.
“Yeah, he’s taking me out for barbecue.”
“Go ’head, girl!”
“I know. I can’t wait.” I could hear the excitement in her voice.
“You know Calvin’s gonna kick yo ass.”
Danielle sighed heavily in the phone. “I’m ready to kick him to the curb.”
“I thought you were feeling him.” For the last several months, all Danielle talked about was Calvin and how good he was at sucking her toes and shit.
“I like him a lot, but he’s boring. I wished he had a little thug in him.”
Why am I not surprised? “Don’t you think it’s time your old ass started looking for something in your life besides drama?”
“Girl, I can’t help it if I like a man that is a little rough around the edges.”
“Yeah, I like my men like bread—brown and a little crisp around the edges—but damn, the mothafuckas you pick are like got damn burnt toast.”
For as long as I can remember Danielle has had a thing for thugs.
Most of them are younger, unemployed, living at home with their mamas, and with at least one baby’s mama.
Now don’t get me wrong. John was a damn bore and I like a little excitement in my life as well, but if I’m gonna be with a thug-ass nigga, then you best believe he better keep my pockets fat, ’cause I ain’t giving this coochie up for free.
I opened the pack of spaghetti and put it in a pot of water. “So, what you gonna do about Calvin?”
“I’m gonna try and cool things off for a while, but he’s such a nice guy I don’t want to hurt his feelings.”
“You can’t have it both ways. Just tell him you want to start seeing other people.”
“That would have been okay if he hadn’t just told me how much he loved me and then I told him the same.”
My brow rose. “Do you love him?”
“I’m not sure.”
I had to bite my tongue. “Then why the hell you tell him you did?”
“Because it sounded like the right thing to say at the time.”
“I told you not to be playing with that man’s emotions.”
“You got a lot of nerve.”
True, I do have a tendency to make a brotha think I want him and then kick him to the curb, but we ain’t talking about me or the bustas I fucked with. “Just tell him the truth.”
“I can’t do that.”
“Then what he don’t know won’t hurt.”
She paused. “I guess, but I got another idea.”
“What?”
“Make a pass at him.”
I almost dropped the Ragu sauce. “What?”
“You’re starting to sound like a parrot.”
“And you’re starting to get on my damn nerves,” I spat back. I couldn’t have possibly heard her right. I was not about to make Calvin think I want his ass.
“I’m serious,” she began with a hint of desperation. “I need a reason to end our relationship so I won’t feel guilty.”
“Aren’t you jumping the gun? What if things don’t work out with you and Chance?” Danielle did have a tendency to fall in love way too fast.
“It doesn’t matter. I’ve been thinking about this for a while. I really like Calvin and might even love him, but he’s ready to take our relationship to the next level and I’m not. At least not yet. You’re the only one that can help me.” I heard that pleading tone and didn’t like it one bit.
“Why, because I used to fuck him?” My voice was dripping with sarcasm.
“Yeah, and you did want him back.”
“That was before I knew you were screwing him.” Hell, the last thing I wanted was her hand-me-downs. I dumped the Ragu in the skillet and stirred it into the ground beef. “Come on.”
Back in the day Calvin and I used to date, and when he started kicking it with Danielle I felt some type of way about it because her sneaky ass didn’t tell me they were dating.
When I found out I was pissed because friends have an unwritten rule not to mess with each other’s exes.
Come on. I used to ride that dick, and might I add, it was a nice long ride, but what makes her think I want her leftovers?
“You owe me,” she finally said in her defense.
“How you figure that?”
She smacked her lips all in my ear as she replied, “Do I have to remind you... Reverend Leroy Brown?”
I had to laugh at that one because she was right.
Kayla had been messing with the Baptist minister for years, and I got tired of him treating her like shit so I videotaped him with this gay dude I knew he messed with.
Unfortunately, the whole thing became a circus act with me and Danielle right smack in the middle.
“Okay, you’re right. I do owe you.”
“Damn right.”
I purposely blew out a heavy breath so she would know that I was not feeling her idea at all. “When do you want to do this?”
“Tomorrow night.”
While I made dinner, we spent the next hour coming up with a plan. I got off the phone with a bad feeling. Hopefully this isn’t another episode to come back and bite me on my ass.
I left the sauce simmering and moved into the family room and found that Tamara had left her shoes under the table.
How many times I got to tell that girl to clean up behind herself?
I moved down the hall to her room. Seconds after opening her door, I stood there shaking my head.
Nasty mothafucka. It don’t make no sense for a young woman to live like that.
Clothes in piles all over the floor. Soda cans lining her headboard.
Sheets and covers hanging off the bed. I don’t know where she got that from.
Must be her father’s side of the family.
Her grandmother had kept a cluttered house and when I met her father, his apartment was a pigpen.
“Tamara!”
“Yes?” she called from the basement where I guarantee she was on the computer.
“Get your butt up here and clean your room!”
“Mama, it is clean.”
“No, it’s not. Now get your ass up here!”
She came stumping down the hall and had the nerve to have an attitude. Hell, if anyone had a right to be mad, it was me.
I stood outside her room with my arms crossed. “You got homework?”
“I already did it.”
“Good, then you can spend the rest of your evening cleaning your room.”
“It’s my room. I don’t know why I have to clean it up,” she argued.
“Because it’s my house. That’s why.” One thing I can’t stand is for a kid to argue with me.
She stormed into her room and slammed the door.
I ignored it because Tamara knows I would snatch her little ass up in a minute if I wanted to.
Since I was making her clean up her room, I went to check on Quinton’s.
As usual, it was spotless. At eighteen, he was a neat freak.
Had been since he was a kid. He was at work and wouldn’t be home until after nine.
I went in the kitchen and almost broke my neck when I slid in a puddle. I reached for a mop and the smell hit me. Dog piss! Dammit, this was the third time this week.
“Nikki!” I called. I spotted my schnauzer in the living room, and as soon as she saw me she ran under the coffee table and lowered her head.
“I’m not mad at you, baby. Something must be wrong with you because I know you know better than to be peeing on my floor.
” I stroked her head as I spoke so she would know that I understood.
I decided to make her an appointment with the vet first thing tomorrow.
Maybe she had a bladder infection or something.
I patted her head one more time and was heading to the kitchen to finish dinner when I heard the doorbell. Before I got there, whoever it was leaned against the bell, ringing repeatedly.
First thing came to mind was one of the neighbor’s kids playing games. I flung the door open and there stood our friendly neighborhood bag lady. I quickly hit the lock on the screen door.
“I don’t mean no harm, but can you take me to the store to get some toilet paper? I’ll give you five dollars.”
She looked tired and sweaty, white spit was on her tongue and the sides of her mouth. It took everything I had not to get sick just looking at her. The way she was wagging her tongue, it was obvious she was cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs.
I quickly came up with an excuse. “I can’t leave. The baby is asleep.”
She nodded, then left to knock on the neighbor’s door.
I felt sorry for her but it was apparent she was going to be like a stray dog.
And as I said before, as long as I helped her, her ass was going to keep coming back.
But as I watched her walk up the street and head back home, I couldn’t help but to think that could be my mother and what if everyone thought like I did.
I rushed into the bathroom and grabbed three rolls of toilet paper, then went to my purse, pulled out five dollars, and hurried up the street before she got too far. “Excuse me!” I called. “Miss, excuse me!”
She swung around and appeared surprised to see me.
“Here,” I said and handed the bag and the money to her.
Her eyes got so wide you would have thought I told her my name was Ed McMahon and she had just won the Publisher’s Clearing House Sweepstakes.
“Thank you,” she said with tears in her eyes. “God’s going to bless you.”
I nodded and turned away before she could see the tears filling my own eyes. I’m a sucker for tears. Damn, now she’s never going to leave me alone.