Chapter 17
Carnage
My phone buzzes, interrupting this peace with Rue. I told him everything last night and it felt fucking amazing. As much as I wanted to stay awake all night talking, we let ourselves give in to sleep. Waking up with him wrapped around me is nice.
The phone buzzes again, and I grumble, rolling over to grab it. It’s Shadow.
Shadow: Are you busy? I need a quick job taken care of and you’re the ideal man.
Me: I’m available. What’s up?
Shadow: Come to my office.
Me: On my way.
I kiss the top of Rue’s head and try to gently extricate myself, but he stirs, holding on tighter.
“I gotta go see Shadow. He has work for me.”
“Mm. Okay,” he mumbles.
“Keep sleeping. I’ll be back.”
“M’kay.” He pulls the blankets up, snuggling into them and tempting me to ignore the boss, but I force myself out of bed.
After freshening up, I throw on some sweatpants and hurry downstairs to find Shadow in his office. My blood is already pumping. I’m ready to do some damage and take my frustration over missing Leon out on someone.
Shadow’s behind his desk, sipping coffee. The house is still quiet, most of my brothers still asleep at this early hour.
“Hey, boss.”
He lifts his head, gesturing for me to enter. I cross the space, plopping down in a chair as he tosses me a folder. “Thought you might like this one.”
I open the folder and glance at the photo inside. He looks kind of familiar. “Do we know him?”
“Not directly. He’s been in the news recently.”
“For what?” I flip a couple of more pages, then find my answer. “Oh, this motherfucker.”
“Yeah. He made bail so he’s a free man until his trial date. My contact says he’s a flight risk and he’s got the money to disappear. He’s getting home around six this evening.”
I study his picture, realizing I’ve been seeing him in the news for weeks. I don’t watch it much, but Whisper and Boone do. We’ve talked about this asshole too. He’s been charged with possession of kid porn and accused of facilitating the abuse of minors.
“I can’t believe they let this fucker out on bail.”
“That’s why we’re involved. Crooked situation. Maybe a paid-off judge. The target has family in Greece and Turkey and a valid passport.”
“Wouldn’t they flag that if he tried to leave?”
“Who? The same corrupt system granting him bail in the first place?”
“Good point. What’s my order?”
“Devastation. Client isn’t interested in letting the justice system handle it.”
I nod, almost salivating at the idea of torturing a child abuser. I’ve met too many losers into this stuff to show even an ounce of mercy.
“Make it hurt,” Shadow says. “Your specialty.”
“With pleasure.”
Shadow nods. “How are things with your man?” An almost smile tugs at his lips. “He is your man, right?”
“Yeah.” I chuckle. “Never thought I’d say that.”
“It seems to be catching around here. One by one they all fall down.”
“Then it’s coming for you too.”
Shadow scoffs. “I doubt that.” He fiddles with a pen. “He seems sweet. Can he handle us?”
“I think so. He’s been through some shit too, he just carries it differently.” I exhale slowly. “He wants to be involved when I take out Leon.”
Shadow raises an eyebrow. “Involved how?”
“I don’t know. Present, at a minimum.”
“What do you think about that?”
Shrugging, I lean back in the chair. “I get it. I’d want to see it too. But Leon is sketchy, and now he knows what I’m willing to do. I need to keep Rue safe.”
“You’re not out here alone, Carn. We’ve got your back, and that means we’ve got Rue’s too.”
“I know. I’ll figure it out. First I need to lure Leon from the shadows.”
“If anyone can, it’s you.” He leans forward on his elbows. “I’m happy for you. You deserve love.”
“It’s not like that yet.”
“Maybe not, but it could be, and that’s good. Love doesn’t have to be this scarce resource, only reserved for the best of society, right?”
“Right. By that logic, that means you deserve it too.”
He chuckles. “Touché. I’m good though. I’ve got everything I need.”
He’s lying and I know it. His voice is tinged with a deep sadness that gnaws at my heart for him. Shadow is like the big brother I never had, and he deserves happiness as much as anyone.
“What about…” I stop myself. “Nothing.”
His jaw twitches as he tilts his head back. “I’m fine, Carnage. Bellamy is…” He sits up, fixing his gaze on mine. “A friend, I think. We’ll get there.”
I’m shocked he brought him up, but he must have known that’s where I was heading.
“And Stealth?” I bravely ask.
“What about him?”
“Your connection is… different from the one you have with the rest of us.”
He nods, but his expression is blank. Never play poker with Shadow. He’s impossible to read.
“It is, but it’s not anything.”
“You could, you know. If you wanted to. I know you have rules, but none of us would care.”
He narrows his eyes. “What the fuck does that mean?”
Shit. “Nothing, boss. I was just saying… if you and Stealth—”
“If me and Stealth what? You think we’re fucking?” He scoffs. “Come on.”
“I didn’t say that. It just seems like there’s more between you.”
“Not like that,” he snaps, clearly defensive. “Why do you think that? Am I treating him differently than the rest of you? Do you think my judgment is skewed when it comes to him? Is that what you guys think?”
I hold my hands up, shaking my head. “No, Shadow. Not at all.”
“Then what?”
“Dude, it’s not negative. We just want you both to be happy, and if that’s with each other, it’s cool. We wouldn’t want you to not pursue something because you were worried about how we might react.”
Shadow drags a hand through his hair, leaning back in his chair. “It’s not like that. It’s not. No one is resisting or whatever. We’re just trying to find a rhythm again after what happened. Okay?”
“Okay, boss. Sorry.”
He clenches his jaw and lifts his mug to take a sip of coffee. “We’re done.”
I grab the folder and stand, ready to get the hell out of his office after sticking my foot in my mouth. Just as I make it to the door, he stops me.
“Carn?”
I turn. “Yes.”
“Thank you.”
“For what?”
“Caring. Sometimes I forget that I’m not on an island.”
“That’s on us, then. You should always feel supported, because you are.”
He shakes his head. “Nah, it’s on me. I’ve got walls up to the sky. At least that’s what I’ve been told.”
I hear the hidden part. Stealth told him that. But I’m not stupid enough to go there again.
“We all have walls and our shit to deal with, but you’re not alone, and you can trust us with whatever you’re feeling.”
“I’ll remember that.”
He nods and I leave, walking slowly back upstairs.
At least I have a fun job to distract myself from everything going on.
I’ll catch Whisper and Boone later and make a plan for how to find Leon.
I’m afraid I might have to take Rue up on his offer to show us where the house is, but not until I exhaust every other lead.
I’ll start with Redlight and go from there. When I find Leon, he’s a dead man.
And I’m going to enjoy every second of it.
“Colson said he wants to introduce me to Chicago the movie.”
“Oh yeah?” I zip my jeans. “Is that one of his artsy films?”
Rue chuckles. “Probably, but he said we could watch anything I want next.”
“What’s your favorite movie?” I rest my foot on the armchair while I lace my boots.
“I don’t know. I like regency stuff, like Jane Austen.”
“Jane Austen?”
“Famous writer from a long time ago. I like Shakespeare retellings too. Guess I’m kind of a book nerd.” He grins, pulling a pillow against his chest. “I like disaster movies though too. Like natural disasters. Earthquakes, floods, ice storms. That kind of stuff.”
I glance up at him, smiling. “I do too. I haven’t watched any in a long time, but I did enjoy them.”
“Do you remember your favorite?”
“Hmm.” I tie my other boot. “Probably The Day After Tomorrow.”
“Oh, that’s a good one. Did you see Greenland?”
“No.”
“It’s so good. It’s about a comet hitting earth and it has Gerard Butler, so, you know…” He waggles his eyebrows.
“Is he on your celebrity hall pass?”
Rue giggles, shaking his head. “No. He’s just handsome.”
“He is.”
“Not like you though. He’s Hollywood handsome. You’re…” He pauses, inhaling deeply.
“Yes?”
“Godlike.”
“Oh, come on, Rue. I’m just a man.”
“Not in the looks department. You look like the man every renaissance or ancient Greek sculptor modeled their statues and artwork after.”
I’m stunned by his words. Sure, I know I’m not exactly ugly, but no one has ever said anything like that to me before. “Thank you. That’s… I’m speechless.”
Rue’s smile lights up his face. “I could stare at you for hours. I know that sounds super creepy, but it’s true.”
“Not creepy. Not to me.”
He makes a soft humming sound, tempting me to crawl back into bed with him, but I have a job to do.
“Where are you going tonight?” he asks.
“A house in Crestvale, on the north side.”
“Will you kill whoever’s there?”
“Just one guy if I can help it, but he might have security I have to deal with. He’s rich and shady. Those types usually have bodyguards, but not always.”
“Can I come?”
“What? No.” I approach him, ready to kiss away the cute pout on his lips. “I know you’re curious, but it’s not safe.”
“I’d stay out of the way.”
I cradle his chin in my hand, tilting his face up. “Do you understand how important you are to me? How necessary it is for me to keep you safe? You’re so precious, Rue. So unspoiled by what this world has served you.”
He searches my eyes as he nods. “That’s… nice.”
“It’s true.” I kiss him softly. “Enjoy your evening with Colson. I’ll be back before you know it.”
“Okay, Carn.” He bounces on the bed, tucking his legs under him. “Oh, he invited us to come to Segreto to watch him dance again. Can we do that soon?”
“Yeah, of course. It’s a nice club and he’s very talented.”
“Cool.”