Chapter 33
ESSENCE
I lay my head on Dante’s chest as he carries me out of the carnival. Here with him, I feel warm and safe and content for the first time in forever. Listening to the steady beat of his heart, and feeling the peaceful energy radiating from him—
“Essence!”
Well, that feeling was short-lived.
“Shit,” I hiss as Ebony comes storming up to Dante and me when we reach the main entrance. I push against his chest until he lets me down.
“Are you kidding me?” she seethes, looking between the two of us. I really hope I don’t look like I’ve just had sex. “Where the hell have you been?”
I clear my throat and look down at my feet to buy myself some time to think up an excuse.
“I, uhh, was just talking to… umm…”
My face flames from shame and embarrassment; I hate lying to my sister.
“We were just catching up,” Dante says from beside me. “I’m sorry we kept you waiting for so long.”
My sister eyes him warily, and it’s then that I remember his mask. I sneak a glance at him out of the corner of my eye and see that one of his hands is behind his back, but Ebony doesn’t even seem to notice.
Thank fuck.
“I bumped into him at the ring toss, and he helped me find my phone,” I say a bit breathlessly.
She lifts an eyebrow and reaches out to smooth my hair down. “Uh huh.”
Fuck.
“Essence, I understand you’re going through a lot right now, but keeping me and Matthew waiting just so you can get laid is fucked up,” she scolds me, then she eyes Dante up and down. She makes a sound of disappointment at the sight of his pants, which are still unbuttoned.
My face is on fire now.
“I don’t even know you and this is my first impression of you,” she says to him coldly.
“Ebony, you do know him. This is Leo’s dad, remember?”
To be fair, she’s only met him once; when Leo and Matthew would have playdates, she would bring him to my house so he could see Lunchbox, and she could have a few hours to herself.
“Let’s go.” Without acknowledging what I’ve just said or waiting for me to move, she grips my hand and drags me along behind her.
I look over my shoulder at Dante and mouth an apology. He smiles and waves a dismissive hand.
I’ll call you later, he mouths.
I nod and smile back, feeling giddy despite my sister’s fury.
The giddiness quickly dissipates, though, as soon as we get in the car. Ebony’s silent, but I can practically feel her anger coming off of her in waves.
“Eb?” I say quietly as she puts the car in drive and pulls away from the fair.
“I’m not going to scream at you, Essence.
Mostly because Matthew is asleep and I don’t want to disturb him, but you need to get it together, sis,” she says tightly.
“What you did tonight was incredibly inconsiderate. Having us sitting in this damn car waiting on you so you could get some ass. And at night, no less. The parking lot is practically empty now.”
I flinch at her sharp tone. “You said you wouldn’t yell.”
She scoffs. “I said I wouldn’t scream, and I’m not going to scream at you, but I want you to know how disappointed I am in you. Evan hasn’t even been buried yet. Don’t you even care? At least a little bit?”
My eyes fill with tears at the thought of him and at her words. “Of course I do, but you also don’t know the hell I’ve been through for the last two years.”
My sister sighs in disappointment. “No, I don’t know because you’re not telling me anything.
You never tell me anything, Essence. All those times I’d be on the phone with you, and you never once told me the extent of his treatment of you.
I’m trying to be understanding, honey, because I know everyone grieves differently, but do not ever pull some shit like this again. Do you understand?”
Even though Ebony is only a year older than me, she’s always had her moments where she’s more of a mom to me. I hate disappointing her.
I swallow and nod.
The rest of the car ride goes on in silence. I take Matthew out of his car seat and get him ready for bed so Ebony can calm down.
After I get him back to sleep, I go into the guest room to get ready for bed myself.
I immediately go to the bathroom to get my birth control out of my cosmetic bag—Dante’s comment about me not needing it after tonight reminded me that I haven’t taken it today—but it’s not there.
“What?”
Dumping out the contents of the bag into the sink, I literally take every single item out until it’s empty. No box. It’s thick and blue, so it’s not hard to miss.
I wouldn’t have forgotten to bring it with me since it was already in my bag when I went to get my stuff from my house the other day.
Then it hits me—somehow, some way, Dante must have beat us here and taken it.
Is he really that desperate to get me pregnant? I know that he’s mentioned us starting a family together, but tonight was the first time he’d alluded to actively wanting to knock me up.
I blow out a frustrated breath and put everything back into the cosmetic bag.
It’s fine. It’ll probably take a few months before I’m even able to get pregnant, which gives me enough time to get some more birth control. In the meantime, though, he’s not coming anywhere near me without a condom.
Of course, I’ve fantasized about having kids with him too many times to count, but I’d rather wait until I have a better paying job before that.
And it would be nice if Dante and I were married first…
Marriage? That’s insane. We haven’t even been on a proper first date yet.
After I put my cosmetic bag back underneath the sink, I gather my curls into a bun on top of my head before stripping out of my clothes and getting into the shower.
The hot water stings the cuts and knicks Dante’s knife left on me, but the sharp pain quickly turns to pleasure.
Not necessarily in a sexual way, but it just feels nice.
Despite the tongue-lashing I just got from my sister, my moment with Dante keeps replaying through my mind.
His strong hands forcing my legs apart so he could feast on me like he was starving, and the way his tongue felt on my throbbing clit. The way he choked me as I rode his huge dick... It’s crazy how he knows exactly where and how to touch me to drive me insane.
When I’m done showering, I dry myself off with one of Ebony’s fluffy towels, get into some comfy clothes, and get in bed.
Dante said he’d call me, but I can barely keep my eyes open now. I send him a quick, chastising text before I drift off to sleep.