Chapter 21 #2
Magdalena knows what happened better than Flora or me. She nods along with what Flora says, but it’s as though she’s waiting for her daughter to finish, so she can carry on with her side of the story.
“Once I had you, I was a single mother without a job. I relied on los Aguilar and my parents, so I wouldn’t have to get a nanny for you.
I wanted to be the one who raised you. That was more important than being independent and struggling to put a roof over our heads.
By the time you were old enough not to need me as much, it felt like I was too old to learn anything new.
And everyone knew my connection to los Aguilar. That’s when things began with Ernesto.”
“He provided for us, but at what cost, Mamá? My life. That’s what it would have come down to.”
“He told me you’d work in a lab. I had no idea it would be in the jungle.
He told me he was getting you a professional position.
But it wasn’t until the second time you went to the lab that I truly discovered what he was doing.
Believe me or not, but I argued with him.
He threatened both of us. That’s when I learned you’d met with Humberto directly.
Things were beyond my control, mija. I didn’t want to fill your head with ideas that you could disagree with Humberto or your abuelo because I knew they wouldn’t forgive you for that.
Ernesto lied to me about you not having protection.
He swore up and down you had guards going with you.
That’s why I thought they were just men at your place watching out for you.
After all these years—even as duplicitous and calculating as your abuelo has always been—it’s hard to accept he’d risk your life.
I knew deep down he would, but it’s far easier to blame los Diaz. ”
She shifts her focus to me. She observes how I hold Flora close. I believe she sees the genuine affection I feel for Flora. How I really am dedicated to her daughter. However, unlike the other men in their lives, I am not lying when I pledge to make Flora my priority.
Her shoulders droop as she sighs. Resignation makes her look older than she did a moment ago. She’s a beautiful woman who didn’t look her age until now.
“Mamá, can you accept Pablo?”
Her gaze bores into me.
“I can’t promise more than I’ll try. I need to see him with you longer.”
“We aren’t staying in Bogotá, Mamá. We’re going to New York.”
“Why? If Humberto’s dead and so is Néstor, the threat is gone.”
It’s time for me to interject with more truth that’ll only hurt her. But secrets at Flora’s and Magdalena’s expense got us in this mess.
“No, Senora, it’s not. Humberto didn’t have the money to pay such an expensive hit.
Neither did Néstor. Someone bankrolled that.
We still need to find out who. They may not kill Flora.
But if they let her live, it’s because they want her knowledge and the formula.
We have more resources at our disposal when we’re in New York. ”
“But in New York, you have more syndicates than just the Cartel.”
“That’s true. But like I said, we have more resources there than we do here. Flora’s also not as recognizable there as she is here. She can blend in far better.”
Magdalena assesses me, and I know she’s finally accepting what we’ve said is true and that Flora hasn’t exaggerated.
I don’t believe she’s a fickle woman who’s simply thrown up her hands in annoyance and given in.
I think we’ve cracked the shell she’s kept around herself for decades, that she knows the things we’re saying resonate because of how the men have been in her life.
I don’t know that she’ll ever fully believe in my innocence and Ernesto’s culpability, but it’s a start.
“Mamá, Pablo and I need to get going. We’ve already packed up my apartment. I didn’t want to leave again without saying goodbye. I don’t know when I’ll make it back down here, but I hope you’ll consider coming up to the States.”
Flora hedges her bets and doesn’t suggest Magdalena move there but at least come for a visit. I squeeze Flora’s waist.
“Once I’m certain you’re not in danger, I’ll bring you back down here to visit whenever you want.”
I’m careful not to say “if.” I leave it open to Flora saying never.
I don’t believe it’ll come to that, but my guess is it’ll be a long time before she’s comfortable here again.
Perhaps not until after Ernesto’s death.
As much as I’d like to hurry that along, he’s still Flora’s abuelo.
If most of our troubles stem from betrayal, killing her grandfather would hardly redeem me or prove my loyalty.
Magdalena nods. I know she regrets now that she spent this entire visit arguing with her daughter, but Flora wants to get away from here.
I don’t blame her. If it weren’t for Flora, I would’ve bolted ages ago.
I don’t want her to feel rushed and squeeze her waist again as she looks up at me.
I hope she understands we can stay longer if she wants.
Her gaze tells me she wants out of here fast, so I won’t push the issue.
“Senora Bautista, I wish we’d met under better circumstances, but I hope to see you again in New York whenever you’re available to visit.”
I’m just as careful not to say “us” as I was about “if.” Let her draw her own conclusions about Flora and me living together.
I don’t need to add insult to injury. I let go of Flora’s waist to offer Magdalena my hand.
She glances at it before extending hers.
While she squeezes hard to make a point, I’m careful not to crush hers.
Flora hesitates when I let go of Magdalena’s hand, then she hugs her mother. I watch as a couple of tears drip from her eyes. I want nothing more than to be the one hugging her now, but that’ll have to wait.
“Te quiero, mija. I’m sorry for all my mistakes. I hope one day you’ll believe I did what I thought was best. I know many of my decisions were selfish, but I never made them to hurt you.”
“I know, Mamá, and I don’t want you to think my relationship with Pablo is to spite you or Abuelo. It’s because he’s the only man who’s right for me.”
“I hate admitting it, but even a blind man can see that. I can fight you on this, but I’ll only lose you.
I can tell Pablo would encourage you to pick me, but you wouldn’t forgive me for putting you in that position.
I don’t want to. Pablo, please take care of my nina.
I’ve always loved her more than anything, even if it doesn’t seem like it. ”
“I believe that, Senora Bautista. We all make tough decisions in life, but when you live ones like ours, the ripples reach farther than for most people. I swear I’ll always do everything I can to make Flora happy.”
“I know you will, Pablo. When a man in your family commits to a woman, it’s forever. The only person whose marriage failed was Enrique, and that was his first one. He married out of duty to your family. But it was obvious from the start that woman was never destined to be his soulmate.”
“My tío’s met the right woman, and he’s with her now. You’re right that my family waits for the one person they’ve always been meant to be with. We’re blessed with that. Flora is my one person.”
“Pablo is mine, Mamá.”
If we were alone, I’d admit my feelings to her, but I won’t tell anyone else before her. When you know, you know.
Flora gives her mother another hug. “Bye, Mamá. Te quiero.”
“Bye, nina. Let me know you arrived safely, please.”
“I will.”
Magdalena walks us to the door and watches as we climb into the SUV.
I wish Flora and I were alone after all that.
I’d pull her onto my lap and hold her, but that’s not an option.
So instead, I draw her to sit in the middle seat so she’s close to me.
I wrap my arm around her shoulders, and she leans her head against my chest. My other hand takes hers, and she wraps both of hers around mine.
Her breathing is steady and deep, but I know she’s fighting the tears that threaten to come back.
Alejandro and Papá remain quiet, as do our driver and the bodyguard in the front passenger seat.
We pull through the gate and take our place in the motorcade.
You’d think we were some type of international delegation.
This is how the jefe de jefes’ family rolls when we need to make a point.
Flora agreed to lie down in the plane’s cabin.
She was exhausted by the time we made it onto the jet.
Once it was safe to move about, I suggested she go back there.
If my father and Alejandro weren’t with us, I would’ve stayed.
Even if we didn’t have sex, I would’ve lain in bed with her and held her while she slept.
Instead, I made sure she knew where everything was, then offered her a kiss before walking out.
I looked back over my shoulder as she climbed into bed.
Now I’m sitting with Papá and my cousin as we discuss Flora’s and my conversation with Magdalena. Alejandro scowls throughout, but Papá reasons with me about Magdalena’s choices. He doesn’t agree with them any more than I do, but he’s a parent, and I’m not. He tries to get me to see that.
“Papá, I’m sure you’re right, but it still wasn’t easy to witness that conversation. Putting aside the things she called me, it upset Flora, and there was nothing I could do about that.”
“And that’s part of being in a relationship. It’s accepting the things you can’t fix as much as you want to. I know you would’ve done just about anything to shield Florencia from the pain that went along with talking to her mother, but it was a necessary evil.”
“I know—”
My phone vibrates in my pocket. I pull it out and show my father and cousin the screen. We recognize the phone number, even though there’s no name associated with it.
“Hola Marcos. ?Cómo estás?” Hello, Marcos. How’s it going?
“Hola, El Tigre.”
The Tiger.
It’s one of several titles I hold as second-in-command.
It’s what generals are called in cartels.
I’m a four-star. I’m a jefe in my own right since I technically oversee our New York operations.
Nobody calls me that. Many call me el capitán.
Some even believe I’m el secretario—the jefe’s right-hand person—because I’m inline to inherit Tío Enrique’s position.
But that’s really more my father, since he has been Tío’s right-hand man longer than I have been alive. I respond to all of them.
“You probably won’t like this, El Tigre, but Ernesto’s already on his way to New York.
He didn’t know you’d come back to Colombia, so he took off to the States, assuming that’s where you went rather than to the estate or wherever else you traveled.
He plans to bring Senorita Aguilar back to Colombia. ”
In reality, Flora’s last name is Aguilar Bautista since the mother’s last name comes last in Spanish-speaking cultures.
However, her connection to the Aguilar family will always stand out among our men.
I’m certain those who know she and I are together doubt my decisions.
They know the open hostility between them and us.
With time, I’m also certain they’ll realize Flora is nothing like her father’s side of the family.
“Do you know when he will land?”
“In an hour or two. He left a little before you.”
“You’re certain he doesn’t know we came back to Bogotá to pack up the senorita’s apartment?”
“No, El Tigre, I’m positive he would’ve stormed over there if he’d known. Instead, he purchased a one-way first-class ticket to JFK.”
It’s not like my family never flies commercial.
We do sometimes, but it’s hardly our only option with two private planes at our disposal.
Ernesto has no private plane. And while it could sound snooty of me to think it, it just shows he isn’t playing in the same league as my family.
Though very few are. The only true rivals to our wealth are the Kutsenkos, Mancinellis, and O’Rourkes.
That last set of fuckers wish they had as much as the rest of us.
They trail behind. Sure, some of them have finally made it to billionaire status, but not all six of the men in that ruling family are there.
They’re barely more than knuckle-draggers.
The Kutsenkos are vodka-swilling meatheads.
They’re the biggest of all of us, but not by much.
And the Mancinellis spend far too much time eating pasta than hitting the gym.
They believe their history as Italian Mafia still holds sway in New York City.
They wouldn’t have to strike the other families so often and so hard if they truly mattered.
It’s my family that has a dynasty running an entire hemisphere. Nothing happens in the Western one without our knowing about it. That’s how we’re aware Ernesto’s on his way.
“Marcos, keep me informed about what’s going on. I want to know when he lands and where he goes, who he sees, and what he talks about. Please contact Tío Enrique and let him know what’s happening.”
“El Tigre, I already called el jefe. I know this is about you, but I still figured I should go to him first.”
“You made the right choice. Keep us posted.”
I hang up with one of our senior leaders and look at Papá and Alejandro. I had the call on speaker, so they heard the same thing I did. I shift my focus to the closed door, where Flora sleeps on the other side.
“I don’t know whether I should tell her yet. I don’t want to keep unnecessary secrets from her. I know she’d believe me if I said I kept it from her because it’s Cartel business as much as it’s about her, but she wouldn’t appreciate it. Papá, what do you think? Is it even safe for her to know?”
“I think it’s safe, but what will it gain you if you can’t answer all the questions she’ll have?”
Alejandro shakes his head. “It’ll piss her off if you tell her later you knew all along that Ernesto got to New York ahead of us.”
“It probably will, but will that upset her more than me not having answers to her questions? I’d rather her angry at me than scared about him.”
I look between my father and cousin, and they both shrug and nod.
Our family traits are so deeply ingrained into our DNA that it’s almost eerie.
The Diaz blood most certainly pumps through all of us.
Papá and I are mirror images of each other.
Our looks and our mannerisms. Alejandro looks the most like Tío Enrique, who looks so much like Papá.
Despite that, Alejandro sounds just like his father.
He has many of Tío Matáis’s mannerisms too.
“I think I’ll wait to say anything until I know who he’s going to for help. If I need to tell her before that, I will, but I don’t want to make her any more anxious than she already is.”
Papá looks skeptical, and Alejandro appears resigned. I don’t think I’ll win for trying on this one.