Chapter 19 #2
Dammit. I hoped he hadn’t heard me.
The feline smirk curving that mouth told me otherwise.
“There’s nothing wrong with admitting that I find you attractive,” I snapped. “It’s the fucking oath’s fault. And stay out of my head.”
Rykr’s lips threatened a chuckle, but this time, something softer lit his eyes. Amusement, yes, but also understanding—like he knew exactly how the oath was twisting our emotions and didn’t resent me for it. That made it worse somehow, made him harder to hate.
Seth rode up beside us. “What are you whispering about?”
Rykr, asshole that he was, tightened his arms around my waist. “Just how much I’m enjoying having her bouncing on my balls. That a problem, Seth? Or do you need a written account of everything that happens in our tent, too?”
My face flamed as Seth’s eyelids practically twitched. Even from here, I saw Amahle’s shoulders shake with laughter as she rode in front of us. I bit my lip, trying to keep a smile from my mouth.
“Dammit, Rykr.”
“Imagine how much he’ll hate it if he finds out we can have private conversations without saying a word.”
The exchange was so easy, so fluid, that I did smile, despite my best effort.
“There’s nothing to worry about, Seth,” I said, keeping my tone steady.
“We aren’t planning an overthrow at the training camp, and we certainly aren’t foolish enough to try anything with a host of Vangar watching our every move. ”
Seth didn’t seem convinced. “Just remember, Seren. The Vangar oath represents more than any individual loyalty to an encampment. If anything happens there, it won’t just be your life on the line.” His warning hung in the air like a sword over our heads.
Seth flicked his reins, simmering frustration evident in the rigid set of his shoulders, leaving only Darya trailing behind us—a silent reminder that we were far from trusted.
“Your taste in men is questionable.” Rykr pulled away from me. “If that’s who you were involved with before. Or has Seren had a long string of suitors?”
I sighed. Maybe this conversation needed to be had, given what Seth had implied about me at the council meeting, but I didn’t relish it. “The ten years we’re required to be in the Vangar, most Viori don’t get married. Everyone turns a blind eye to the amount of bedmates most people have.”
Lowering my voice a bit more, I said, “But Seth was my first—and only—lover.” I’d considered sleeping with others, just to forget him, but no one had ever appealed enough, and I’d spent my free time training instead.
“Being petite put me at a natural disadvantage in the Vangar and I had to work harder to keep up.”
And Seth had broken my heart.
Whether Rykr heard that thought or sensed it, he stiffened slightly. “Did you love him?” Rykr’s voice was surprisingly gentle, none of the judgment I’d expected.
“I thought I did. But I was naive. And clearly, he didn’t love me.”
Rykr gazed out at the forest, squinting as we went through a beam of sunlight. “Love and attraction are confusing, no matter what age. It doesn’t mean you were naive, just human. I’m sure a few years from now, someone else will make you much happier than he ever would have.”
I released a light, sardonic laugh. “How very reasonable of you, Rykr. But I don’t know about that.”
“You’re beautiful, obviously, and a force to be reckoned with. A little tornado of fury when you’re angry.” His lips teased a smile. “I’m willing to bet there are more than a few men in your tribe who’d happily sell their souls to be with you.”
He thinks I’m beautiful?
I pressed my tongue to the roof of my mouth, trying to swallow back the strange flutter of warmth that went through me at his words.
“I doubt it,” I said at last, with a taut smile.
He couldn’t know that my family had always had a tenuous position here, thanks to the twins and my parents’ love for their homelands.
Or the lasting effects this marriage would have on my prospects.
“What about you? Is there a woman in Pendara that’s caught your attention? ”
I’d wondered about his past several times, mostly because I’d been an interruption to it. While he’d assured me he wasn’t married, that didn’t mean he didn’t care about anyone, either.
He laughed lightly. “Are you asking how many lovers I’ve had?”
The thought of Rykr with other women made my stomach turn, but I’d be a fool to think he lacked experience. I gave him a flippant shrug. “You asked me.”
“What do you think?”
The evasive answer was good enough. I bit my lip. Rykr was handsome enough to have any woman he wanted. “Fine. Keep your secrets,” I said, nudging the horse forward. “But if you’re going to keep dodging my questions, don’t expect me to answer yours either.”
Rykr tilted his head, a half-smile forming. “Fair enough, thistling.”
I ignored the teasing. “If we’re supposed to trust each other enough to survive this, maybe it’s time you stop hiding things from me.”
“My family doesn’t do love matches,” he said abruptly, in a dry tone. “Marriage is strictly for breeding, according to my father. And pedigree.”
He’d dodged my question again.
His bound wrists caught my attention, reminding me of what Ciaran had said about his lack of a Bloodbinding mark. For Rykr to be without it meant something dangerous—either he’d escaped the rite, or he was hiding something far worse.
Even though Darya rode several feet behind us, and we whispered, who knew if she might overhear something if I asked him about it now?
Darya possessed spellcraft powers. Given that could cover many things, I didn’t want to risk discussing anything truly suspicious with her nearby, no matter how friendly she’d been over the last few days.
Then again, she couldn’t overhear mind speak.
“I’ve been meaning to ask you something.”
Rykr’s thumb tapped against his iron cuff. “Now who’s the one in the other’s head?”
“If you’re allowed, then so am I.” I smirked over my shoulder. “Why don’t you have a Bloodbinding mark?”
The fingers on his right hand curled slightly. “Who says I don’t?”
A beat of silence passed before he added, “Maybe you’re looking for something you’re not supposed to find, Seren.”
His words, simple and calm, sent a chill through me.
“I noticed this morning when I put on your irons. You don’t have one. I may not have noticed before because plenty of Unbound Viori don’t have one. But you should—you’re from Pendara.” Transferring the reins to one hand, I tapped my fingers on the iron above his wrist. “Right here, no?”
His hand slipped down, then grabbed my wrist. His touch sent a delicious sizzle of heat down my veins, and my fingers flexed. “Sometimes we can’t see what’s right in front of us, Seren.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” My breath caught, my body increasingly aware of the effect of his thumb brushing lightly over the sensitive skin of my wrist. His palm slid up the back of my hand, then his fingers interlaced with mine, curling down.
My fingers curled reflexively, my pulse speeding.
I leaned back against him without thinking, heady with mounting desire.
“Sometimes marks don’t mean what people think they do,” he murmured, glancing at Darya as if to check whether she was listening. His voice was too quiet, too careful.
My fingers tightened around the reins. What kind of secret was he keeping, and why was it important enough to hide even now?
The tension in his answer settled uneasily in my chest. Whatever it was, I couldn’t shake the feeling that knowing might change everything.
Rykr’s lips skimmed my earlobe. “Don’t ask questions you don’t want the answers to.”
I drew a sharp breath, then scowled, yanking my hand away. “Why don’t you make yourself useful and hold the reins? I’m going to read so I can prepare a defense at Emberstone to save your ass. Again.” I needed all the information I could get if I wanted any chance of living.
“Yes, because your last plot to save my ass worked so well. If I recall correctly, the death threats haven’t let up since then. Not to mention the deadly trial we’re facing. Maybe I should take over the plotting for a while.”
His teasing tone cut through my irritation. “I don’t need to plot. I could outsmart you in my sleep.”
His blue eyes sparkled with mischief as he took the reins from me. “You think of me while you sleep?”
I shook my head, struggling to keep the smile off my lips while I tugged a book from my satchel. “It’s more like a recurring nightmare, actually.”
He laughed and my heart squeezed, a strange mixture of pleasure and worry. I snuck a look toward my friends—my faithful allies—who might view every shared laugh and whisper as further evidence of my shifting loyalty.
But, dammit, even though we bickered, and he was deliberately giving me non-answers, using his tongue to alienate potential allies like my sister and friends, I liked his company.
I wasn’t sure we’d ever be friends like Ciaran and Amahle, but I was sensing that I didn’t only need him to live so I didn’t die. Somehow, I wanted him to live.
Every hoofbeat on the forest trail echoed with unspoken questions, as if the trees themselves were listening.
Shadows stretched long beneath the canopy, and with each passing mile, the weight of what awaited us pressed heavier on my chest. Something was coming.
Something I couldn’t yet name, but it was there, lurking just beyond the edge of sight. Waiting.